This is actually a very long chapter for me! Thank my new pocket computer! Writing on the move...

The main difference between this story and my other beyblade epic, 'In your prime, Rei', is that this is a more realistic portrayal of homosexual love. In this, it's only Tala and Rei- the two good friends- who are gay. While in the other one- everyone seemed to be gay. I tried to make it so this story would actually show what it was like to be a homosexual. This is why I've included the Miguel/Matilda and Tyson/Hilary story lines- showing everyone else is straight- and made Kai confused rather than excepting.

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I reached out for Kai, my fingers twitching and desperate. He looked back at me and sneered, he was disgusted by my intentions. He hated me and he didn't care about showing it.

There was a thudding sound and I was surrounded by the smell of blood and fear.

Copper fear on my trembling lips.

"How dare you feel you have the right to love me!" Feet stamped above my head and bright lights danced widely in my mind. Kai's eye's snapped open in front of my own, and jeered at me. "You aren't a woman. You may look like one, but at the end of the day- you're just some pathetic teenage guy. Why would I ever want you over a women? What could you, a member of the fallen house of Kon, ever offer a guy like me?"

Kai's eyes vanished and footsteps echoed. I raised my head in time to see doves flying up from gravestones, Kai's naked form obstructed by them both.

Hands grabbed at my own naked body and violated me completely. Kai laughed in the distance.

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Saturday- 1 DAY TILL X-DAY

"Rei! Please wake-up, Rei!" Tala's panicky voice actually was quite a comforting thing to wake-up to after a nightmare like last nights. I moaned slightly and opened my eyes.

"What's up, Tala?" I asked, still sleepy.

"Nothing," He sighed and smiled. Tala was standing over me fully dressed. "It just looked like you were having a bad dream." Tala stepped back a little and pushed his hand behind his neck. "You were screaming 'stop' quite loudly."

"What time is it?" I rubbed my eyes and sat upright.

"Nearly midday." Tala sat down on the bed. "There's a party tonight, are you interested?"

"Party? Who's is it?"

"Funny you need to ask. It's actually Tyson and Max's, but I think that other girl is taking the credit."

"Hilary? Yeah, that sounds like her..." I laughed privately, as Tala had no idea about Hilary.

"You had no idea about this party? I thought you got on with Tyson and Max."

"I do but..." I slipped my feet out of bed and searched around for clothes. "Ever since I've been skipping school and spacing out, we've kinda stopped talking."

"Good. Tyson's an asshole and Max should have been born a puppy." I frowned at Tala, and slid on his black shirt and trousers to protest.

"Don't steal my clothes, you bastard!"

Tala grabbed me from behind and I laughed while trying to escape his hold. He finally managed to get his hands under my arms, and he playfully (yet meaning it!) tried to get the shirt off. We both laughed and he proceeded to tickle me- forcing to give him better access to the shirt.

I became aware of his warm breath on my exposed neck, and without realizing what I was doing- leaned back into his hold and closed my eyes. To answer this, Tala stopped tickling me and let his hands roam over my stomach- pushing the shirt upwards.

"Rei..." Tala moaned into my neck, his voice heavy with musky lust. My eyes snapped open- suddenly noticing what was happening. But I didn't pull away...

Tala traced circles into my chest, and started to plant kisses down my neck.

Tala had never kissed me before.

"You better stop that now, Tala. This feels weird." Tala quickly drew his hands out from under my arms. "I'm sorry- I shouldn't have done..." Tala muttered.

"Don't worry about it. I shouldn't have let you get started in the first place."

Tala didn't reply, and when I turned around he wasn't there- the bedroom door open.

I raised my hand up and gingerly felt the places where Tala had kissed me. I caught myself wishing he'd kissed me properly...

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It was dark by the time me and Tala got to the venue of the party. We'd taken Tala's crappy old Honda as we didn't have enough money for a cab. Okay that sounds a little odd- but trust me- if you'd ever gone pinion on that bike with Tala driving, you'd pay all the money you owned to go by cab instead.

And to top it all off- even though I'm actually gay- it's still embarrassing being driven around by another guy. The amount of wolf-whistles we got...

Tala swung his leg over the handle bars and pulled off his helmet, shaking out his hat-hair. For once he'd done his hair like a normal person, and for some reason it reminded me of Max's hair style- but it was slightly more swept back.

As I watched him- it seemed like everything moved in slow motion.

"Yo, Rei! Quit spacing out and get off!" Tala smiled and clipped his helmet onto a saddle bag. I slipped off the Honda and handed him my helmet. "Hey, your hair wrap..." To my utter dismay, Tala handed me my torn hair wrap- which must have got caught on the helmet. Tala just laughed as I fumbled around with my loose hair.

"What the fuck am I gonna do now!" I whined, getting really worked up about it.

"Rei, I like your hair down." He grabbed hold of some bags which were flying about madly and tucked them behind my ear, stroking my face as he did so. Tala had always managed to have a good calming affect on me. "Are you sure you can manage this party? You did nearly have a mental break down yesterday."

"So did you."

"But you're the only person I have to answer to..." Tala said worriedly. "You still haven't seen K..."

"REI! TALA!" Hilary collided into Tala and began clinging onto and stoking him like a dog. "You look SO cute with your hair like that! And oh my God! Rei!" She bounded from Tala onto me and tugged at my hair. "It feels so nice! What shampoo do you use?"

"Hilary, do you always have to act so shamefully?" We all looked up to see Tyson in the doorway to the house, arms folded, looking very green-eyed.

"Sorry if your girlfriend has to look else where, Tyson." Tala laughed, and grabbed Hilary off of me by her wrist. She screamed in shock as Tala twisted her round, to eventually bump into his chest.

I forgot how much Tala hated Tyson...

But he really shouldn't play games with peoples hearts like this.

Hilary moaned a little (she was drunk if you couldn't already tell!), and tugged at Tala's shirt. My heart leapt when I noticed it was the same one I'd worn that morning.

"Tala..." Hilary raised her head upwards and rose onto tip-toes.

"Shit, Hilary! I was only jokin..." Hilary cut Tala off with a very drunken- yet scarily passionate- kiss. Tala's eyes jolted wide open and it looked like he'd frozen on the spot.

Both Tyson and I leapt foward at the same instant; he grabbed Hilary and I grabbed Tala. It was only after I'd grabbed him, I started to wonder why kissing Hilary should bother me anyway, and by the look on Tyson's face, he was wondering the same thing.

"Come on then you guys, you better get inside..." Tyson sighed. Tala seemed to snap out of it- and hastily started to wipe his mouth.

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Inside was practically pitch black- with trippy lights as the only light source. People lay around on the floor in small groups, drinking from various different bottles. Heavy metal music played loudly out of a number of speakers, a style I'd never been fond of. I looked back at Tala who was walking behind me- to find him smiling and nodding to the music.

Stupid Russian, what an awful taste in music!

I looked back a moment later, and found Tala had stopped following me. I searched around the room for him desperately, but it was too dark. I saw there was an open door leading to the gardenso I stumbled towards it, needing to get away from the light and music.

The garden was void of any other people and quite dim. I could still hear the music loudly- but I just felt better out here. I took a swig of the Alco-pop someone had passed me and wished it was something stronger.

"Hey, Kon. Didn't think you'd show," I instantly recognized Kai's voice and was unable to turn around. Tala's words before Hilary had showed up came back to haunt me. "Are you alright?"

"Err...Yeah, I'm fine."

"We've had this conversation," Kai sighed and stepped in front of me. "You're not fine are you?"

We both looked straight into each others eyes for a while, and I suddenly looked away, feeling awkward.

"I'm not fine...I-I'm sorry."

"Rei look...Everything's fine. We're friends, right! None of this matters..."

"Why are you still trying to talk to me?" I yelled still looking down- tears biting at my eye lids. "Why don't you hate me? Don't you at least resent me?" I found the courage to look up at Kai, to find him quite taken back. "I've done so many shit awful things to you Kai. I've told so many lies. Smiled when I wanted to die, taunted when I wanted to hold." Tears began to fall freely down my face now and Kai looked quite hurt for someone who never showed a shred of emotion. The sounds of the music behind me seemed to vanish, till all that was around was me and Kai.

"Did you really think that being nice to me would take us back to how it was before? Before when all we ever had was based on my lies and lust. Not that we ever had much..." I started sobbing loudly and held my head in my hands.

"Rei, don't do this to..."

"I'LL DO WHAT I LIKE!" I screamed. I swung my fist forward blindly- hitting Kai square in the jaw. Kai grunted and skidded back a little on the damp grass. He adjusted himself quickly and grabbed my wrists- holding them above my shoulders. His hands were clammy and his breath smelt strongly of vodka.

"You were always my friend, Rei..." I looked up at Kai who was inches away from me. His expression had become soft and calm, the beginnings of tears forming in his own eyes. I noticed how close his mouth was from mine- and how pink his lips were. I was shocked when the sight of those lips re-played the play-fight with Tala that morning in my head

"How can you trust me to do the right thing?" Kai dropped my wrists, sending my Alco-pop crashing to the floor. He almost looked disappointed, but I didn't understand why.

"I trust you. You're a good friend. My only friend really..."

"Why can't you just hate me and let me get over you? I can't stand this fantasy you seem to have of normality." I wiped my eyes and managed to stop crying.

"I don't really understand anything, or really what your problem even is- but I know I could never hate you." Kai actually wiped back a tear. "you're confusing me so much..." And with that, Kai ran back into the house, leaving me and his abandoned bottle of vodka, all alone...

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"Hey, babe, what are you doing out here all alone?"

"Drinking," I sighed and turned around. "And it's not babe. I'm a guy." I giggled drunkenly remembering that with my hair down, I did look like a girl from behind.

"Rei Kon?" He said sharply- almost threateningly. I could just about make out blonde hair and shorts, but I was too drunk to focus on his face. "As you look pretty shit-faced, I'm guessing you can't tell who I am, can you?"

"The tooth fairy?"

"No, it's not the fucking tooth fairy!" He snapped. "It's Miguel."

Oh crap. He's gonna want revenge for Matilda, and I'm too pissed to fight back!

"And apart from trying to pick me up before, what do you want?" I put my empty vodka bottle down and stood up in front of him so I could read his facial expression. He looked pretty angry...

"You don't even like her! Why would you do that? You knew we were dating!"

"Well, no, I don't like her, but then I honestly didn't know you two were dating." Miguel shifted awkwardly and jammed his hands in his pockets. "Tala said you'd broken up anyway- so why do you even care?"

"Why the hell should I tell you?" Miguel yelled looking away from me- his fists clenching in his pockets.

"Then don't tell me. See if I care..."

"She cheated on me," Miguel said softly. "Or- at least I thought she did."

"What happened?"

I'm not gonnna get beaten up! Yay! There is a god!

"We went to a bath house- you know- our team. Thought it would be a good holiday for us. We had a spring all to our selves but Matilda started to feel faint, so me and Aaron went to get her a drink- but when we came back..."

"Her and Claude?" I asked.

The music in the background seemed to start playing again, even though I knew it had been playing all this time. Miguel was looking at the ground, seeming rather hurt- so I automatically wrapped my arms around him. Miguel didn't move his arms to try and hug back, but I could tell he needed to be held.

"We came back and...he was on top. He had his hands on her bre...he was kissing her. I didn't think. I just dumped her a few days later. I never considered that she's just fainted and started to drown. Claude was just helping her...and I hurt him badly...and I must have hurt her badly too..."

"You love her?"

"So much..."

"If it helps..." I laughed and let go of him. "She called me Miguel the whole way through, she didn't even say sorry for it." Miguel blushed. "I know what it's like to be in love too. And she still loves you- a lot."

"Really? I've never seen you with a girl before? Who is she?" Miguel looked at me innocently for an answer- one which when I was drunk- I couldn't hold back.

"Kai." His eye's opened wide, but then he quickly tried to cover his shock. "I'm desperately in love with Kai."

"R-really?" Miguel's eyes shot about everywhere- apart from at me of course. "B-but...Kai's a guy."

"Yep."

"So t-then why do you...I mean...but you can't really...how can you...no, no, no...I don't mean like that, just like how...but...Rei! Kai is a guy!"

"Homophobic now, are we?" I couldn't help laughing watching Miguel squirm.

"No but, how can you like another guy like that?" I shrugged at him.

"Anyway, I better try and find Tala, he's propably dying in a bathroom somewhere by now...Thanks for sobering me up a little..."

"Don't mention it..." I walked towards the door only to stop when Miguel called back at me. "Hey, Rei. Were you her first time?"

No. I wasn't...

"Yep. Sorry, man."

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Just as I'd predicted, Tala was throwing up in the first toilet I came across.

"You're an idiot, Tala. Where the hell did you go off to?" I closed the door and locked it, after pushing some random drunk girl out first. "I haven't seen you all night, but you still managed to get shit-faced."

Tala raised his head out of the toilet to look me up and down, maybe to confirm that it was actually me. His eyes suddenly widdened and his face dropped back down into the toilet- gagging sounds following. I sat in the sink next to him, letting my hand dangle down onto his back.

"I spoke to Kai." Tala coughed a little- most likely from shock- and sat back up again.

"Kai's a bastard," Tala mumbled. "Always was- even when he was younger. I still don't get why someone like you could ever love a guy like him."

I didn't say anything back to that and just looked straight ahead- but not really seeing anything.

"But who am I fooling? Why would a guy like you, ever love a guy like me?" Tala dove forward and clutched the toilet again. I found myself rubbing his back. "It's not like there's anything about me you could ever love, is there, Rei?" Tala forced his head back and pushed my hand to one-side. He grabbed the towel rack, and very shakily, pulled himself up. We looked at each other in silence for a long time, and for some reason, I could hear wings flaping in my ears.

"Tala, I really do love you, but..."

"...but not like 'that', right? I'm your fucking brother, right, Rei?"

The music seemed to get slower and I became aware of every breath I drew. The alcohol in my system reared it's ugly head again, and I felt out of control and light-headed. The wings flaping in my ears kept getting louder.

"As well," I said gentally, fear seeping through. Tala raised an eyebrow. "Not as a brother. I love you as well." Tala slid back down the towel rack- sending a collection of towels flying over him. "I think I always have."

There was a loud hammering on the door and both of us jolted awake- completely sobered up. I noticed the music had stopped.

"Police are here. If you wanna spend a night together in jail- stay in there!" Came someones panicky voice.

"Shit. We better leave then."

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After escaping from the party, I bought Tala a coffee at a late night cafe, and we were forced to ride home again. The ride back with Tala was a lot different from the earlier ride. The headlights of cars going past were brighter and moved slower, creating lines of white and yellow across my vision. The sound of the Honda's engine was ghostly and felt like it was a long way away from me. My hands, arms and chest glowed with the warmth emitting from Tala- touching him for such a prolonged period of time had become intoxicating, and I was slowly getting more and more spent- wings flapping widely in my ears. The wings of butterflies or bats or angels or lust...

Tala pulled into the flat's car park and swung over the handle bars again- this time a lot slower. He took off his helmet- and then mine- and clipped them onto the saddle bag. Without a single word passing between us, he coaxed me off of the bike and picked me up.

He was still pretty drunk, so walking wasn't that easy, but I would never have let him put me down. He opened my flat's door and kicked back to close it again after we'd got inside.

Tala took me into my bedroom and lay me down on the bed, letting himself kneel over me.

"Rei, I love you. I've always lo..." I grabbed his shirt and pulled him down onto me.

Our lips gentally rubbed together, needing the contact between each others skin like never before. Tala slid a hand up the side of my chest, runching up my shirt- uncovering my trembling skin. His tounge slowly developed the kiss into something more, and I found myself moaning softly, gripping his back tightly.

Tala slid both of his hands around my back and pulled me closer to him, making my whole torso leave the sheets- supported purely by Tala. My hands despratly ran along his back- his shirt already far up his chest- and the skin contact felt fulfilling. It seemed a lot of sexual tension between us was finally being satisfied.

Tala lay me back down again and broke off the kiss. He sat up across my hips- and started to un-do the buttons on my shirt.

"I'll run away with you," I gasped huskily. "I'll be your lover."

Tala opened the shirt up and smoothed his hands over my chest. "I love you."

"I love you too, Tala." A hand lazily traced its way down my chest. "Please don't tease..."

"As you wish, master."

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...That was a very long chapter... .drops head onto keyboard... Loads to explain...

The 'flapping wings' thing is something I get when I'm around someone I'm really sexually attracted to. As my heart will beat faster, blood pumps around my body- and past my ears- a lot quicker. This creates a humming sound, similar to flapping wings, in my ears. You might get it to, but never really have noticed it before. I've given Rei the same thing as I think it's a good reaction to desire.

At one point Miguel asks Rei, "..how can you like another guy like that?". I actually got asked this once myself- apart from 'girl'- and I remember it really upset me at the time. But now homophobic people don't bother me- because I believe that I'm gonna love whoever I fall in love with and not care about their gender. Love is more powerful that expectations and rules.

Hope you enjoyed this chapter, and please tell me what you think!