Chapter 5: the plan.
So far: too much to summarize – but I'll try.
Hermione's curiosity is aroused by the strange behaviour of Snape. She investigates and finds that his younger sister, Stella, died. Feeling sorry for him inevitably leads to her focusing on him more which leads to a peculiar crush blossoming.
Hermione, blinded by this new feeling, sets up a four stage plan to "satisfy" her – but does not realise infatuation is not a thirst to be quenched. She "breaks" into Snape's chambers and takes a book, without thinking. Ginny turns out to have kissed and started dating Draco Malfoy. And Hermione and Ginny reveal each of their secrets to each other.
Then Hermione sets into action stage three of her plan and approaches Snape after class... and kisses him.
Before you read I would like to say one thing: Alan Rickman should be replaced by Johnny Depp! He would probably be great at the part! It would be a two in one dream!
Severus watched in annoyance as Hermione Granger decided to approach him. He was quickly forgetting any gratefulness he had had for her understanding his loss. She was still an annoying, pushy girl.
As soon as she was a close distance and stopped in front of him he sneered at her "Well?" He was surprised to find that her eyes were glazing and showed rapid thoughts crossing her mind.
And then... she had suddenly leaned forward and pressed her lips against his, wrapping her arms around his neck as she did so.
Severus froze in shock. What the hell was she doing!? Why? The questions rolled and he found himself unable to think properly for the first time in his life. He was in a state of disbelief. He was numb and he was almost unaware of her petite body pressing against him.
Hermione was nervous as hell. She found herself wanting this to end because it was not half as sweet a kiss as she had imagined. It was uncomfortable. But leaning against him she felt at home and wondered if she was meant to belong in his arms. She hoped so.
When finally he came to his senses he pushed her frame away from him. His brain was starting to work properly again. He gave her a look of confusion and astonishment.
"What the hell was that, Miss Granger?!" But before he could get a reply Hermione had dug a hand into her pocket and pulled out her wand. She lifted it hesitantly and pointed it towards him.
Natural reflexes kicked in. Without even thinking about it he had his own wand out before she could open her mouth to say the spell.
"Obli-" but Severus cut her off.
"Expelliarmus." Once her wand was on the other side of the room he lowered his own to look at her.
"Now," he hissed with more confusion then anger, "Explain to me Miss Granger, what the hell was that?" he was irritated to find that she merely looked at him with big guilty eyes for a short time.
"Well," she started walking slowly towards where her wand had landed. "I was planning on not having to tell you, because of a stupid miscalculation of mine..."
"And what was that?" he was absorbing everything she told him like a sponge before processing it.
"I forgot that you would almost surely pull your wand on me too," she said nervously as she shuffled ever closer to her wand.
Severus shook his head, he could not understand. "Why?" But he was angered to find Hermione just ignored him and bent to pick up her wand.
"I have a proposition to make," she started, although her heart was racing, she remained cool on the outside, "I think it would be easier for you and for me," she fiddled tensely with her wand between her fingers, "if I obliviated you..." When Severus looked furious at the proposal she hurriedly continued. "Then things would go back to normal, because this is going to affect a lot of things if I don't..." she finished.
Severus thought her argument was poor but when he weighed the positives and the negatives, it would be nice to just forget what had happened.
"On the condition you explain," his voice was devoid of any emotion. Hermione paused, nodded and started to head back to her original position in front of him.
She sat down on the surface of one of the front row desks opposite him. She looked at him.
"What do you want to know?"
"Why?" he asked for what seemed like the millionth time, he glanced up at his doorway. "Is this some sort of twisted prank, or dare?" Hermione blushed and shook her head. He frowned.
"I-I..." she fell silent and she hoped he would not make her say it aloud. He just stared at her for five long seconds before his frown deepened and she thought maybe he had figured it out.
This was confirmed by a disbelieving shake of the head. "This is not possible," he was muttering to himself and her at the same time, "How did this happen?" He looked up at her and she looked away.
The cold of dungeons was beginning to close in on her and suffocate her, she wanted to leave.
"This was a bad idea. Can we please get this over with," she begged, she was having trouble breathing normally. Severus frowned harder. He could tell she was getting uncomfortable and did feel a little bad for her but that was strongly overridden by a need to know.
A thought came to him.
"If I were to look in your bag, would I, by any chance, find a copy of The Magic of the Ancients?" he said softly but the tone scared her more than any other.
He was not too surprised to see she gripped the bag tightly. Her eyes shone with guilt. He shook his head again and folded his arms. This was way too much for him to take in.
"I cannot handle any more of this. Feel free to Obliviate and leave," he sighed. Hermione was starting to see huge flaws in her plan. She wished she had never ever thought of what she had done. But it was over now and she felt more humiliated and embarrassed than she had in a long time.
She did as she was told and pointed her wand at him. She looked up and saw him staring into her eyes, into her soul. She stared back. His black eyes captivated her and for a moment she almost stopped regretting her moves. She had, despite the uncomfortable vibes, relished the kiss.
She found herself hesitating before she whispered "Obliviate." The spell hit him in the chest and she got up to leave.
She walked numbly along the corridors, her steps slow and her feet heavy like lead. Her mind felt empty and soggy like a wet rag with no ability to hold anything more.
She had to find Ginny, now. She was the only one she could talk to.
She knew though that Ginny would be in the common room and to see her would mean having to see Harry and Ron first and right now they were the last people she wanted to see. They would have a lot of questions about what kept her and whether she was alright. She determined talking to Ginny was not worth it.
She decided to go and sit by the lake.
She dragged herself outside and when she reached her spot she pulled out her wand. A couple of spells later she had her blanket and pillow.
She slumped down and snuggled into the pillow. She felt drained. She wanted to sleep and forget about what had just happened. It had been a full blown disaster.
As she pinched her eyes shut she unwillingly recalled the warm fuzzy feeling in her stomach when she had leaned forward and kissed him, the feeling of pressing up against him. It had been better than she had imagined but what had happened after had cancelled out any of the good sensation left.
But she was incredibly grateful that he allowed her to obliviate him. If he had not, she was sure she would not have been able to come within a hundred feet of the dungeons.
She sighed and shifted position.
Her growing calm was abruptly ended with the sound of footsteps approaching. Oh gosh. Please no. She panicked. Please not Snape. She knew that right then she could not handle looking at him, even if he did not remember. Her crazy liking for him was pushed away for the moment.
She refused to open her eyes when the footsteps stopped next to her. Go away, go away, go away, go away, she kept wishing.
"Hermione?"
It was not the voice of a man but of Ginny. Hermione was so relieved. She looked up at her and gave her a weak smile.
"Hello, Ginny," she said with a large amount of exhaustion. Ginny frowned. She moved forward and sat down next to Hermione on the red blanket.
"What's wrong?" she asked, concerned, "What happened with Snape?"
At his name, Hermione let out a large groan and shook her head. She turned away from Ginny.
"Oh dear," Ginny muttered quietly. She bent over and hugged Hermione briefly, comfortingly. "You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to..." Hermione knew that that sentence was eating her up inside because Ginny really wanted to know what happened.
"No, it's ok..." she said forcing herself to sit up. It was not ok but she wanted to get it off her chest. She turned to Ginny, striking a story telling pose. "It was going according to plan... I kissed him-"
She was cut off by a loud "Ooh! Details!" from Ginny. Hermione rolled her eyes.
"Umm...ok..." she started unsurely, "Well, he sort froze which is predictable but," she thought for a moment, "it was a really nice feeling... Wait! That is not the point! After I kissed him something went wrong-"
"What!?"
"I was getting there!" snapped Hermione irritably. "When I pulled out my wand he pulled out his too. I definitely underestimated his reflexes. He blew mine out of my hand and forced me to explain!" Ginny squeaked nervously.
"Oh my gosh! So you didn't get to obliviate him? He knows!?" she gaped. She felt so bad for Hermione.
"No." She had lost all will to explain further.
"No? Why not?" Ginny sat up straighter.
"He decided that after an explanation, to be obliviated was the best option. He also figured out that I was the one in his chambers. The thing is, I don't know if he already knew that before the kiss because I did not use a strong spell... what if he still knows I have his book?"
Ginny didn't know what to say. She laid a comforting hand on her arm as she thought of something.
"But he doesn't remember that you like him?" she asked. Hermione shook her head. "Well then, that's ok. He can be as pissed at you as he likes for taking his book and nothing will change because he will probably think you took it because you simply wanted to read it and his was the most accessible of the eleven."
Hermione looked up at her and smiled, "Thank you Ginny. You always know what to say."
Ginny shrugged "It's a gift."
They sat silently in front of the lake together until the sun started to lower in front of them.
Severus paced his study. His long black robes flowed behind him sinisterly and he kept abruptly swivelling to retrace his steps. His long black hair curtained his face and sharp features. His eyes flickered over the ground he was tracing.
He could not sleep. He could not stay awake, however, without thinking. Thinking was what was destroying him, what had destroyed him before and probably once again.
He was also plagued by a blank spot in his memory. He could not remember about ten minutes of the day after class. That had not happened to him in a long time. Something must have happened. He tried to remember but couldn't.
He took a deep breath and stopped pacing and glided over to his chair in front of the fire. When he sat his robes draped over the edges of the chair and he propped his chin on his fist in thought.
Pushing that idea aside, he wondered who possibly could have his book. He had wondered that all day but now, after that blank spot, he felt an itch in his brain when that subject crept up.
He rubbed his temple with his fingers.
Hermione closed Severus' book at two that morning. She was tired but she had been so absorbed in the book that she had totally lost track of time. This had been happening every single night since she had taken the book, which made it five days. She decided that the next night she would go to bed at a normal time.
She got up way too soon for her liking and went through the early morning motions. She tried very hard to forget what had happened the day before last, even when Harry groaned and pointed out they had potions later that day at breakfast. She could not face him.
Severus walked up and down the desks, placing papers on each one in turn, keeping his back straight and his posture threatening even though the students had not arrived yet.
He felt especially pissed today. He wanted to make his class suffer for every moment he had to endure of teaching. Maybe it was lack of sleep that had put him in such a bad mood. He did not know and did not really care.
He slammed the last paper down gracefully on the last desk and was approaching his desk when the door opened. The seventh years filed in then dispersed to their seats. They all looked questioningly at the papers on their desks but did not say anything, knowing he would explain.
He waited coolly for the last person to sit down then took a couple of steps their way.
"As you know," he started in his usual menacing yet lazy tone, "NEWTs are only a month away," nervous groans from the class, "Silence. If you have been studying properly, then you should have no problem with this surprise test." The whole class gasped.
Hermione's head snapped up. Test? She had been so absorbed in her book she had not studied in her scheduled amount. She was so tired that she found the nervousness draining into an urge to take a nap.
"Quills out," he sneered softly. There was a shuffle for quills from bags and ink bottles. Hermione plonked hers on the desk and sighed. She felt really bad. Her eyes were stinging progressively. She rubbed them in vain.
"You may begin." There was a collective sound of all the papers in the class being opened and then the sound of scratching quills.
...
Hermione finished in twenty minutes. She slowly looked around. Most of the class was a little under half way. She breathed a sigh of relief. She could take a well earned nap now.
She looked up briefly at Severus, he was fully occupied, grading papers at his desk. Good. She shuffled herself into a comfortable-ish position. She folded her arms and put them on the desk. With a grateful smile she laid her head down on her arms. Her cheek rested on her right elbow.
She slowly closed her eyes, the last thing she saw was the left side of the class working hard at their papers in the dim light of the dungeons.
It seemed like she had closed her eyes for only a second when she was pulled out of her daze.
She blinked and looked around the class, lifting her head dreamily. They were almost done. She realized she must have slept a little while. She was aware of something else too. She turned to look to her right and found what she had expected. Snape was looming over her with a look of pure outrage etched onto his features.
She blinked twice more to clear her vision. As things came into focus she became increasingly conscious of his icy stare. She normally was not affected by it any more but now she felt the shivers run down her spine.
"Miss Granger," he hissed. Even though his voice was soft it shook with rage she had not seen from him for a while. "Kindly clarify why you are sleeping in my class. During a test." He leaned forward to threaten her. His long, shoulder length hair fell beside his slim predominant cheek bones. She gulped.
She tried very hard to suppress the thought 'Damn, he looks good' and managed to.
"I-I..." Severus frowned harder, the itch in his brain had returned. "I haven't been getting much sleep lately... I am really sorry!" she added, honestly hoping the apology would help some. It didn't appear to.
"Miss Granger," he sounded less angry and more bored of having to constantly tell students off, "I will speak to you after class." He looked sternly at her and she nodded solemnly. "If there is one mistake on this test..." she looked up at him "then you will have a detention to serve." The class looked at her in suspense but everyone knew she had not got one mistake and Severus knew it too.
She stared at him with tired eyes. He noticed they had red rings underneath and he wondered why she had been missing her sleep. If it was NEWTs, which was what he strongly suspected, he pitied her some. He remembered how much time he had spent on studying, himself.
"Fair enough," she said and picked up her test to hand it to him, defiantly.
He noted her boldness, how Gryffindor of her. The corner of his mouth lifted into a cross between a sneer and smirk. He took the paper from her hand sharply. Taking his eyes off of her face he opened the first page of her test with a rattle of paper.
His eyes glided over the answers and he abruptly turned the page. The whole class waited to see, forgetting their tests.
When he was on the fifth page his eyes fell to rest on one question. There was nothing wrong with her answer but he had a powerful urge to unnerve her. He looked up at her slowly over the paper with a cold smirk.
He placed it calmly on her desk and she glanced at it briefly, wondering what he was doing. He explained himself.
"You may have one final chance to look over the test before you hand it in," he was expecting to see her snap upright and hurry through her answers to find her mistake. But to his astonishment, she gave the test a long sleepy look and laid her head back down in her arms, closing her eyes.
Severus could feel the eyes of the entire seventh year potions class on his back. He whirled around swiftly and immediately everyone bent down and the silence was replaced by the scratching of quills under his cold black stare.
He gave them all a reproachful look before turning back to Hermione, cat napping in front of him.
He knew he should be boiling inside with rage but he was irritated to find that he could not call up such feelings at that moment. And although he glared at her with all the spite he should have felt, inside he was void of any emotion which was enough to trigger his curiosity.
He suddenly turned and left, leaving her to sleep. His robes billowed behind him as he walked up to his desk as they always did.
Severus glowered to himself. He wished this lesson to end.
And end, it eventually did. The time crawled by until the bell rang.
As soon as the glorious sound was heard there was a bustle as people got up to hand their tests in and leave. He collected each of them roughly from their hands and once every other student had left, apart from Hermione, he was not surprised to see her in a deep sleep on her desk.
He gave her a long gaze before gliding over to her and he picked up her test, never taking his eyes off of her. He could not see her properly because her hair flopped over her face and the desk. But he could see the relaxed look on her face and felt it would be crueler than was necessary to wake her yet.
He took the paper up to the front of the class, flicking through it as he did so. He would mark it first before he would have to wake her.
Carefully sitting in his chair he focussed on her test, eyes narrowing in concentration. His raven eyes scanned her answers for the slightest mistake.
He knew it was hopeless but he proceeded nonetheless. It would buy him more time to let her rest. He did not understand the reasons for his sympathy for her. He felt that it was not necessary to be so cold hearted towards her at the present time because she was already suffering from exhaustion.
He sighed when he finished and closed her papers. He sat them on the desk in front of him then rested his elbows on the desk, crossing his fingers and looking over them at Hermione, putting off the moment he would have to disturb her.
He did not move from that position for a possible half hour, like a wild cat poised to leap.
His thoughts drifted and as he watched her. He was surprised to realise he admired her bold character and her intelligence... and the curve of her face. He shook that thought out his head and abruptly stood.
He buried the thought deep into his mind and a moment later he found himself forgetting it. He strode over to her desk with his robes dragging behind him.
He towered over her and looked down his nose at her, hesitant to speak.
"Miss Granger," he said sharply and she jumped before him. She slowly pulled herself upright and he waited for the sleep to leave her eyes entirely.
"Mm?" she said dreamily. A millisecond later she realized where she was. She straightened her back and replaced her relaxed expression with a concentrated one. He wanted to smirk but didn't.
"No need to get so tense," he said airily with a vague wave of his hand. She looked befuddled but did not speak. She did as she was told and he could see her shoulders slump and she leaned back thankfully against her chair.
She looked down at her desk and noticed her paper was gone. "Do I have to serve detention?" she asked, gazing up at him. He shook his head.
"No. However, I do not appreciate students falling asleep in my class," he hissed and Hermione nodded lazily, already sure of what he was going to say. "See to it that it should never happen again." He leaned a little closer to catch her stare and she was rendered unable to blink.
He straightened up again, feeling his point was made. As he turned to walk back he talked over his shoulder.
"If you really needed to stay awake in my classes and are not willing to give up study time, then I am surprised to find that you have not already taken a simple potion to wake you up properly. I am strongly against a student destroying herself with the misuse of potions before an exam. You should remember that sleep is vital and without it you cannot expect to get as good a grade as you normally would."
He reached the blackboard and whirled around to face her across the room. She felt, despite the distance, that he was staring into her soul. His voice, though soft, carried easily.
"If I should ever find you asleep in my class again, or even anywhere else during the day, then there will be hell to pay," he finished effectively.
Hermione had not moved, her fuzzed brain was not taking what he said to her full potential. She just nodded. Her eyelids were struggling to stay open. He seemed to notice.
"You may go," he nodded shortly to her, "go straight to sleep and do not study tonight." Hermione tilted sideways and picked up her bag.
She stood and slung it over her shoulder. She nodded briefly in reply then stumbled dozily over to the door.
He watched her leave and felt something. He tried to figure out what that something was but it didn't have a name. Was it interest? Was it care? He could not tell. But he now felt the need to make sure she did not overwork herself.
Hermione had not been overworking at all. She was surprised and ashamed of herself to think so but when she studied she found she could recite everything of her notes before she even read them. She knew it all and it frustrated her and she would study but the book had higher priorities at the moment.
Ginny raced over to her the moment she saw her enter the common room. She almost slammed into Hermione.
"Hermione! Where have you been!?" there was a look of anticipated excitement gleaming in her blue eyes. "Harry and Ron said Snape kept you back after class!" Hermione shushed Ginny and looked around the common room, nobody was looking at her but she preferred privacy.
She gestured Ginny should follow and went over to the girls' tower. She was closely trailed by her. They went up together to Hermione's dorm and when she saw her bed she wished she did not have to explain, instead she just wanted to sleep.
"Here we go," she muttered under her breath. Then she spoke in a louder tone, "I fell asleep in his class, during a test. That's all. He made me stay behind to speak with me." She said it trying to show Ginny that it was nothing.
Ginny reacted in the total opposite way. "Ooh! He kept you back after class! What did he want to talk to you about...?" She was starting to irritate Hermione in a way she never had before. She did not understand why. She sincerely hoped this was not a result of her Snape fad.
"Just that I should never fall asleep in his class again or "there will be hell to pay" and that I should not take potions to keep myself awake because misusing them would only further any damage-"
"That is so sweet!" Hermione was taken aback.
"Why?!"
"He was looking out for you. He was, in his Snape-ish way, praising you for not having already taken them. He was also warning you of their dangers-" she said convincingly but Hermione cut her off at her last word.
"It's his duty as a teacher!" what Ginny was saying was absurd but at the same time, she wanted it to be true, deep down inside.
"Yes but he usually "conveniently forgets" to warn anybody other than the Slytherins..." Hermione was starting to follow her line of thought. Ginny could tell by the comprehending gleam in her eyes.
"So, what your saying," she started slowly, "is that there is hope?" Ginny grinned and nodded. Hermione raised her eyebrows as she considered the possibility.
"I don't understand what you see in him, really but it would make sense that you would. His is the only mind I think capable of matching yours," Hermione blushed at the compliment but it made perfect sense to her. She had a similar mind to him. She thought way back to her first year, the final test to get through to the Philosopher's Stone. Severus' test had been the easiest to her because it was what she was best at; it was also what he was best at.
"We do think alike, in some senses..." she said more to herself than Ginny. Ginny nodded feverently.
Her eyes lit up as she came up with an idea, "Hermione, I know exactly what you need to relax..." Hermione looked up questioningly, "this Saturday there's a PARTY!" She grinned at Hermione, expecting her to be excited too.
She tried to force a smile on her face. She did not particularly feel like being shoved into a room crowded full of people and forced to talk about unimportant stuff just for the sake of it and having to dance when she could be studying. "Alright," she said with a smile but it was very resigned.
"Great!"
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Luv, Snakecharmer