A/N: Here's chapter 3! I'm really sorry that it took so long to update! U can blame my high school. Anyways, you know the routine, read it, and review! ….Yay!! ^.^ I hope ya enjoy it!
~~~The Torture Begins~~~
Duo and Heero wiped away their tears as much as they could and were forced to embrace to truth: they had to wear those hideous baby GIRLY outfits. The girls wouldn't have it any other way and the boys would give anything to see the Perfect Soldier and the God of Death in pink and purple baby clothes. The laughing slowly ceased and the tears gradually dried.
"Are you ready to be transformed, little ones?" Hilde asked the infants with a wide smile and a wink. Duo violently shook his head and Heero gave Hilde the death glare. Ignoring the glare, she handed a package of diapers over to Quatre.
"Well, what are you waiting for?" Hilde questioned Quatre, who had a confused look on his face.
"What do you mean?" he inquired. Relena slightly blushed.
"We can't change them," she finally said.
"Why not? Isn't this a woman's job?" Wufei mocked.
"So, you want us to clothe the naked Heero and Duo?" Hilde intervened. Duo and Heero get the picture and practically beg the boys to change them. Duo folded his hands in pleading mode to the guys and Heero waved his arms about in protest and anger towards the girls. To sum it all up: There was a lot of loud noise coming from the toddlers going in both directions, causing their screams and rants to echo through the rooms and hallways.
"Cant' you guys show a little sympathy??" Duo beseeched the guys.
"Why are you always trying to humiliate me!!" Heero yelled at the girls.
Finally, Wufei couldn't take it any longer. He let out a loud shriek, pushed the girls out of the room, slammed the door shut behind him, forcefully laid the toddlers on their backs, grabbed the diapers, threw the diapers at Trowa and Quatre's face, and stormed back to his seat. ((Whew!)) "There! Now it's your problem!" he concluded with a thunderous yell. The boys were shocked by his earsplitting reaction, Heero and Duo laid there stunned, and the girls stood outside the room with confused expressions on their faces.
"Uh…well, should we get started, Trowa?" Quatre cleared his throat.
"What other choice do we have?" he sighed. The boys plodded over to the infants and readied the diapers. Trowa hesitantly situated himself in front of Duo and Quatre skittishly took position in front of Heero.
"…What do we do first?" Quatre had no idea what he was doing.
"I guess we remove the blankets," Trowa responded. But do you honestly think Trowa knows what he's doing?? I'll let you decide…
The blankets were removed and placed comfortably underneath the tots. Duo felt extremely uncomfortable. First of all, he didn't like the fact that he was naked and secondly, he didn't like being place on his back like this. To fix these problems, he just simply rolled over and lay on top of the blanket on his belly. He didn't mind too much of his rear end being exposed and he didn't mind lying on his stomach. Problem solved and everyone is happy!! Yeah, right! DUH!! Of course not! Trowa didn't like being mooned, especially by Duo…
Heero wasn't any easier. Quatre's worried and panicked look of "I have no idea what I'm doing" was not pleasing at all. So, he turned over on his right side. Much better! Right? Wrong! Heero was definitely NOT expecting Duo's bare bottom to be facing up. It was quite shocking and disturbing. He let out a high-pitched yelp and quickly with intense speediness rolled over on his left side. Good! Now, all Heero had to do was stare at the wall. Perfect! Or was it? Quatre's hopes of successfully applying the diaper just went from bad to worse…
Duo lay contentedly on his stomach, and slowly let his eye close and go into sleep mode. Trowa's eye twitched. Not only was he being mooned, but he was also being completely discarded and ignored. He grabbed the blanket from underneath him and snapped it away like the tablecloth trick sending Duo twisting and rolling in mid-air and landing hard on his back. Duo rubbed his head to try to soothe the pain, but that wouldn't stop the throbbing soreness or the dizzy spells. He finally focused his attention to Trowa who had his arms crossed. Duo greeted him with an awkward chuckle and continued to lie uncomfortably on his back while Trowa tried to figure out which side of the diaper was the front. But, Duo was getting too uncomfortable and he continually tried to lie back on his stomach as Trowa continually snapped the blanket while Duo continually spun in the air…
Heero's ears perked up when he heard all loud THUD's coming from Duo, but decided to keep his back turned to him. He had at least hoped that whatever happened to Duo was painful. Quatre winced when he saw Duo's unintentional stunts. He refocused his attention to his real obstacle and carefully thought for a solution. First he tried being polite and asking him.
"Uh, Heero? Could you turn over and lie on your back so I can put this diaper on you, please?" Quatre weakly smiled after asking. Heero turned his head and stared at Quatre, puzzling over his unexpected question. He considered obeying his plea, but then he thought: "Me? Wear a diaper?? No way…" Heero turned his head away and resumed starring at the wall trying to envision Duo's pain. Quatre sighed at his defeat and pondered again, aiming for another solution. He watched Trowa performing his trick tablecloth routine and then looked at Heero's blanket. Quatre grabbed the tip of Heero's blanket and slightly tugged at it. Heero rapidly turned his head and stared at Quatre with his narrowed eyes and a "Don't even think about it" expression. Another defeat. Back to square one, Quatre began to think again…
Finally, Wufei couldn't take it any longer. He let out an earsplitting roar, pushed Trowa and Quatre out of the way, forcibly turned the toddlers on their backs, swiftly wrapped them up in their diapers one after the other, and stomped back to his seat.
"Must I do everything for you weaklings?!!" he hollered. "You can't even handle a woman's job!"
"Well, are you proud to say that you just preformed a woman's task with womanly ease?" Trowa shot back. Wufei's pride fell hard as his left eye twitched. He growled and began to sulk and pout with his arms crossed.
While Wufei and Trowa shot insults at each other, Duo and Heero laid there stunned for a while, not comprehending what just happened. Duo struggled to sit up, but his plushy, weak body disobeyed him. He kicked his feet and waved his arms, but alas… it wasn't working. Heero sighed heavily at Duo's pathetic attempt to get up. That is…until he tried to get up. It sure wasn't easy, but Heero was determined and was not going to let this new body slow him down. He grabbed hold of his blanket and lassoed it to the nearby chair. A light bulb hovered over Duo's head when he saw Heero's efforts to sit up. He was going to prove that he was more "creative" than Heero; actually, since Wufei discarded Duo's blanket off the table in order to prevent further twirling, Duo was forced to find an alternative solution. And with that, Duo lassoed his braid onto the same nearby chair. Heero tilted his head and stared at Duo, who responded with a goofy grin and perky wink. Together they lifted themselves up off of the table and grabbed hold of the chair with a death grip to keep their balance. Duo's legs quivered and Heero's legs trembled. They, once again, stared at each other. "Uh… now what??" Duo finally said. Heero had no idea what to do. He never thought that he would actually get this far and even if he did, Duo was right: what next? Heero's eyes lightened as he got another idea. This would leave Duo behind. Perfect! Heero grabbed his faithful blanket and held onto it tightly. He looked down to the floor. It wasn't that far of a jump, but for a one-year-old baby it may look rather threatening. So, Suicidal Heero took a dive and used his blanket as a parachute. He landed lightly on his butt, but he was ok. Success! Duo ogled at the distance between the floor and to the table. Only Heero would do something that daring. But Duo wasn't about to give up just yet! He held onto the chair a bit longer and pondered over a plan. Presto! Another light bulb! But this light bulb had to be a 3-watt. Or perhaps you'd prefer: "a wet match in a dark cave". So, Duo unleashed his "well-thought-out" plan into action… he jumped. Just bluntly jumped. Duo landed hard on his butt with a THUD, but was uh… sort of ok. At least he was alive, but his rear end didn't feel good. Only Duo would do something that—how should I put this—stupid! Heero shook his head in disbelief and pity, and sighed heavily. "Baka…"
Quatre rushed over to the other side of the table when he heard the loud noise only to discover two babies on the floor, one sitting arms crossed and the other rubbing his bottom. He scooped them up and placed them back on the table.
"NNOOOO!!!" they protested. All that work and effort and butt rubbing was for nothing. At that moment, the girls burst through the doors.
"What's all that noise? Is everything ok?" Relena asked worriedly.
"Everything's fine," Quatre reassured, not noticing Duo's pain.
"Wow! I'm impressed! The diapers are on them perfectly!" Hilde praised.
"Wufei did it," Trowa added while pointing to Wufei and receiving a death glare from him.
"Really?" the girls were shocked and astonished. "You must have a natural mother's instinct!" Hilde beamed.
"I do not!!" Several veins popped out of his forehead. Suddenly, out of the blue, THUD! Everyone looked down and saw Heero and Duo back on the floor.
The girls hurried over and hoisted the baby boys into their warm, soft arms. This comforted them very much. It must've been to their baby liking. Either way, it was just what they needed. Ah… silence. Duo and Heero let their eyes droop and drift into daydreaming and out of reality. Suddenly, the warmth left and the miniature gundam pilots felt a hard surface underneath them. They opened their tired and frustrated eyes only to discover that they were back on the table (again!). This nightmare was far from over. Relena and Hilde stood over them, starring with wide smiles, and held up the baby clothes right in front of their faces.
"AHHH!!! NNOOO!!" Duo screamed, and Heero flinched and twitched. The girls went in for the kill, but the infants kicked and struggled. That is… until Trowa, Wufei, and Quatre assisted the lovely ladies. Quatre held onto Duo's hands and feet while Heero (who was being more of a hassle) was overpowered by Trowa and Wufei. In no time at all, the pocket-sized pilots were all dressed. The teenage boys were busting their guts while the girls were overwhelmed with "aww's" and giddy laughter. Duo and Heero looked at each other.
"You look like a pansy!!" Duo was laughing uncontrollably at Heero's new getup. "And pink really matches your skin tone!" he mocked and teased.
"Look who's talking?! Those purple frills really bring out your complexion!!" Heero shot back.
"Well, at least I'm not wearing pink TEDDY BEARS!!!"
"Well, at least I'm not presenting lavender BABY LAMBS!!!"
"So?! MY lambs are cooler than YOUR teddy bears!"
"No, there're NOT! MY teddy bears are—" Heero paused in mid-sentence. "You can keep your lambs and you can take my teddy bears," he concluded calmly, sticking up his nose.
"But, I …you can't…I didn't mean…" Duo stammered realizing how stupid he was.
The argument was settled, victory was claimed, and the truth was reluctantly grasped. In other words: the squabble was solved, Heero defeated Duo, and they both looked like sissy girls. Relena picked up Heero once again and hugged him.
"You look so cute, Heero!" she affirmed. Heero was in no mood for hugs, nor was he in the mood for Duo's grinning and smirking. He tried to push away, but Heero wasn't as strong as he use to be. Duo laughed at his attempts to get away. The laughing stopped, however, when Hilde came out of nowhere, snatched Duo up, and squeezed him beyond the point of reason. Heero became content again once he saw Duo's eyes popping out.