Guest Ki: Chapter 38
Amazon Days
(Dmp, dmp, dmp, dmp, dmp...)
Barry ran the last twenty meters to Ryoga's door cursing the fact that she hadn't checked the weather forecast before leaving the house. In the gray light of early morning, she hadn't paid attention to the fact that the overcast was clouds, not fog or mist. Now she paid for it. She pounded on the front door then fumbled in a pocket for a key. They had agreed early that, if time were short, Barry should come looking for Ryoga rather than waiting for him to find the front door. With a jerk, she swung the door open and flung herself inside. She bounced off a muscular chest and back out into the street.
"Damn! He musta been right inside the door for a change. Ryoga, don't move! I'll..." She took in the tall, broad shouldered figure before her. "You're not Ryoga." Barry rolled and came to her feet, prepared for trouble. This guy had better... He did look familiar, though. "Do I know you?"
"I doubt it." The light baritone voice sounded a bit like Ryoga, too. She scowled at the face, the green eyes and coarse black hair, the mustache and small neat beard. The man looked her over in return and smiled lopsidedly. The fang at the corner of his mouth clinched it.
"You're Ryoga's dad?"
"Yes. You're not part of the hired help, are you?"
"Nah! I'm..."
"Ryoga's girlfriend?" This was asked hopefully.
"Nah, just a friend. I'm gettin' him ta school," Barry said. She smiled and received another smile in return.
"Is Ryoga here, then?" asked the older Hibiki looking around hopefully. He started to come out the door, but Barry took him by the arm and drew him back inside. He looked at her in surprise.
"If you're Ryoga's dad, let's not lose ya before ya get a chance to say 'hi'," Barry said, releasing him again. "Akari was bringing him in Monday night from the university. We all signed up for a martial arts competition there. If he wins his form, it could mean a scholarship. Sit there!"
The older Hibiki colored a little and looked uncomfortable. "Oh! Come on." Barry dropped him off at the bathroom and walked to Ryoga's room. Miraculously, he was there. Barry regarded the curled up form. In his dreams, Ryoga was still in his tent.
"Yo, Ryoga! Time to get up!"
"ZZZzzzzzz… ZZZzzzzzz..."
Barry shook him a bit and sighed. When Ryoga was like this, only immediate threat or 'pigging' him would wake him up. She really didn't want to 'pig' him. She leaned close to his ear. "Ryoga, because of you, I've seen hell! Prepare to die!" She dodged the punch that came her way, set herself and…
He was still asleep?
"Ryoga! Yer dad's here! Ya don't wanna miss him, do you?"
"ZZZzzzzzz… ZZZzzzzzz…"
"You asked for it," Barry sighed and leaned in close to his ear. This time the tones were not warlike and threatening. "Oh, Ryoga. Last night was... wonderful!" Sultry, husky, Barry cringed a little inside even as she said the words. She watched in fascination as every hair on Ryoga's body stood up and took notice. He thrashed awake, holding his nose.
"Dambit, Barwy!" Ryoga swung at her as she ducked away. "You have no idea... Wadja do that for?" he finally demanded after Barry continued to dodge his half-hearted swipes.
"Yer dad's here, P-chan! I thought ya might want ta say hello!"
Ryoga stopped. "M-my Dad?"
"'Bout yer height, same green eyes, same fangs, same black hair, same lack of direction," Barry ticked off. "One a yer family, anyway."
"Where?" Ryoga looked pole-axed.
"I'll get ya there, P-chan," Barry said dragging him to his feet. "Do you have ta sleep in yer clothes all the time?"
"Don't call me P-chan," Ryoga growled. "What would you do if you tended to turn a corner and wind up in the middle of the Ginzu stark-naked?"
Barry shuddered. "Ya got a point."
They knocked at the bathroom door. "Uh, Mr. Hibiki? Ya still in there?"
The door popped open. "Sorry, I was looking on the wrong side of… Son?"
Barry turned away at the reunion. Hibikis apparently made up for the infrequency of interaction through the intensity. She found herself tearing slightly. Ryoga, however infrequently, knew the love of a family. It explained a lot about his basic decency, as well as his intense depressions. Barry could sympathize about the grief and frustration of separation. Mr. Hibiki broke the moment and roughly told his son to get a bath.
"But, Dad, I haven't seen you in six years!" Ryoga complained. "I want to catch up, tell you what's happening in my life; find out what's happening in yours! I..."
"Son! Hibikis must take advantage of every circumstance. Having a steady way to get to school should not be wasted and you seem to have one friend, at least, who is willing to go out of her way to help you." Mr. Hibiki's eyes ran over the girl-type body appreciatively. "You should appreciate her more."
"Um, Dad, she's not..."
"It's very modern of you to have a friend who's a girl, Ryoga, but she is pretty. She seems nice."
"Trust me, Dad," Ryoga said shuddering. "It wouldn't work."
"Come on, lover boy," Barry said easily, grabbing him by an elbow. "I'll explain to yer dad while you get washed up." She shoved Ryoga into the bathroom and shut the door. "I'll be back in ten minutes! Don't go out any doors or windows," she yelled. She took Mr. Hibiki by the arm and led him to the main room.
"I'll make some breakfast," Barry offered. "Just stay put."
In the kitchen, she turned on the hot water, picked up the phone and dialed the Tendo's. She got Kasumi and told her what was happening. Kasumi, predictably, thought it was sweet that Ryoga was seeing his father after all this time. When asked, Kasumi told her Akane had already left for school. Glancing up at the clock, Barry cursed, profusely apologized to Kasumi for using such language and said her good-byes. She ran a hand under the hot water and turned to open the pantry.
She didn't change. The water was still cold. With a groan of exasperation, she put a kettle on to boil and then opened the pantry, planning to start something cooking while she went up to rescue Ryoga from the inevitable 'pigging' this situation would cause.
"Hello?" Barry said surprised. A woman with long brown hair pulled back in a dark blue bow, stood facing into the cupboard. Startled herself, she turned around, blinked and smiled a little uncertainly. Though an older woman, possibly older than Barry himself was, she was obviously in trim condition and carried herself like an athlete. Barry caught the familiar Hibiki fangs and smiled back.
"Um... I'm terribly sorry about this," the woman said guardedly. " I thought I was in… I'm terribly sorry."
"Mrs. Hibiki," Barry hazarded. The woman met her eyes again, startled. "Ryoga's mom?"
"Why, yes!" After a second she added, "Do I know you?"
"No. But I know someone you might want to see." She took Mrs. Hibiki by the arm and led her out to the main room.
As Barry had observed to himself just before Ranma's disappearance, some things are too intense and private to be witnessed. She literally shoved them into the master bedroom and went looking for Ryoga.
"Squeeeee!"
"Yeah, yeah. I know yer hot water's out. I think today may just be a very good day for ya, though." Barry toweled the little black pig off and picked up the clean clothes that had probably been laid out by Akari before she left Monday. "I got a kettle on in the kitchen. Let's change and talk. I don't think you're goin' ta school today."
Barry didn't make it to school, himself, until the middle of lunch.
Ukyo saw him first. "Where the hell have you been?" she snapped. "You missed Assembly! And where is Ryoga?"
"Last I saw him, he was getting a big smooch from a brunette with a dark blue bow in her hair." Barry shrugged off assembly. Missing one was normally a good thing.
"Oh! He was what?" Barry noted clinically that Ukyo was keeping her mega-spat very sharp.
"That wasn't funny, uh... Ranma!" Akane said after looking around. There were too many people who were too attentive as a result of Ukyo threatening his throat with her 'big gun'. "Boy are you in for it!" she hissed, "and where is Ryoga? You were supposed to-"
"Takin' his time gettin' ta know his mom and dad, I hope," Barry answered carefully. Ukyo's spatula hung at his throat another heartbeat, then dropped away. They gaped at him.
"His folks?" Ukyo gasped.
"His parents?" Akane said slowly. "Omigod! When was the last time he saw them?"
"I don't know about his mom, but it's been six years since he last saw his dad."
"Six... years..." both girls said, tearing emotionally. Ukyo recovered first and placed her hand in what seemed to be a friendly manner across Barry's shoulder. "So why did it take you till lunch to make it to school?" she grated.
"The hot water tank broke over there and they needed someone ta stick around till it could be replaced," Barry said easily. "Also, I had to explain about my curse. Mr. Hibiki was settin' up ta marry me off to Ryoga. Wouldn't take no for an answer, until I showed him and assured him several times 'I am not a girl'!"
Ukyo snickered and shook her head ruefully. "Fate seems to try to set up Ranma and Ryoga quite frequently, doesn't it?"
"If so," Barry retorted, "Fate has a twisted sense of humor."
"Ryoga's not coming today, then?" Akane asked to confirm.
"Nope. His dad was gonna throw him out and make me take him ta school but, uh... he got a bit distracted."
"Oh?" Ukyo and Akane looked puzzled.
"Fer cryin' out loud! I ain't gonna go inta detail about things like that!" Barry blushed, remembering the ki readings that had glared from the master bedroom. They hadn't wasted opportunity at all! Ryoga had blushed and found his way to a seat by the table to wait and Barry had checked on the hot water heater and rescued some documents stored in cardboard boxes nearby. "Hell! Who knows how long it's been since Mr. and Mrs. Hibiki have seen each other?"
The girls boggled at him.
"And you know this how?" asked Akane with a glare.
"I'm not a Peepin' Tom, dammit!" Barry snarled. "Just don't go there..."
They pestered him through the remainder of lunch, of course.
History class continued the discussion Barry's report raised a week ago, as Mrs. Morisato's class examined the Wa and the Yayui in greater detail. They were a collection of small kingdoms ruled by priestess-sorceresses described by the Chinese almost two thousand years ago. In most cases, these powerful women were surrounded by bodyguards; fierce warriors who, also, were women. One, a certain Pimiko, was said to have a bodyguard of a thousand women warriors, but also one man, to help her communicate with her subjects. The general consensus among the males in the class was disbelief and some snide comments wishing to be that lone male. Akane, Shampoo, Ukyo and Kodachi, obviously taking umbrage at some of the perverted comments, rose and asked if anyone present was willing to take them on, individually or in mass.
Barry found himself the center of the men's attention. "Oh-ho, no! Don't look at me!" he said, when it became clear what they wanted. "I don't hit girls, unless it's trainin' or somebody's life is at stake!" He suddenly snapped his fingers. "Besides, isn't today the first of October? I gotta listen to these gals, now, just like you do. I have a feelin' a guy hittin' a girl would be a really bad idea right now."
"Very bad," Shampoo confirmed frostily. She turned back to Barry. "You in big trouble, Ranma," she whispered. "You not at assembly this morning when Shampoo confirmed as Temporary Council President. Why you insult me this way?"
"Uh… Sorry?"
"If that all you miss it bad. But just you wait, Ranma!" Her chin rose and his stomach sank. "You really wish you were there, come end of day," she added cryptically.
Barry hung his head. "Oh, man! I am sorry, Shampoo," he whispered back. "With the weekend, then Ucchan's on Monday and Happosai turning up..." The perverted little Master had returned from wherever that maniac bicycle-girl had chased him and splashed Barry in the middle of his training with Kuno. The equipment, sized for a much larger frame, had so hampered him (now her) that Tatewaki had gotten in several solid strikes. Tatewaki had been in shock at the discovery of his pigtailed goddess writhing within his opponent's equipment in an attempt to regain her breath. Happosai had been caught by an enraged Akane and booted into the stratosphere. "...then Ryoga's parents this morning... I totally forgot what day it was, till a few minutes ago!"
"You forget head if not fasten to shoulders," she returned angrily.
"Shampoo?" Mrs. Morisato's voice rang out in the silence following the Amazon's whispered rebuke. "Do you have something to share with us?"
Shampoo rose to her feet. She nodded her head in respect. "I apologize for disrupting class, Mrs. Morisato." She walked to get her buckets.
Barry rose then and nodded to Mrs. Morisato. "It was my fault, Mrs. Morisato. I should get bucket duty as well."
Mrs. Morisato smiled and waved her hand. As he moved toward the door, she spoke. "Miss Hinako wants to see you as well, Ranma. I believe you were absent this morning from classes?"
Barry winced. He could feel the ki-draining coming. He nodded to her and ducked out. As he left, he heard Mrs. Morisato asking the class about the reasons for Empress Jingo's expedition against Korea.
"Ranma, what you do out here?"
"Grammar, Shampoo, grammar." Barry sighed and shifted his buckets. "I should have remembered. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to insult you. I know how important this is to you."
"You typical empty-head male," Shampoo huffed. After a moment though she asked, "What you say about Ryoga's parents?" She listened intently as he explained and her hard eyes softened. "You also big marshmallow," she said, sniffling. "I forgive you for this morning, though maybe Miss Hinako not do so."
Barry shuddered again. "Uh, Shampoo, what did you mean that I would really wish I had been there this morning?"
Shampoo dimpled, though she also managed to look pensive. "Oh, you find out later. You know Great-grandmother! Not want me to spoil surprise." She rolled her eyes.
"Boo!" Water sloshed and Kogara laughed as Shampoo-cat hung by her claws from girl-type Barry's shirt. In his hand was a hall pass.
"Jerk!" Barry's return smacked Kogara back through the classroom to slam into the registers below the windows. Face contorted, she stood there trembling with rage and, most assumed, the beginnings of a Nekoken fit. Akane and Ukyo, who knew better, relieved her of Shampoo and hurried off to the bathroom to change her back. Mrs. Morisato walked delicately over to the redhead and leaned over to gaze into her eyes.
"I understand why you are angry, Ranma, but it is not within your authority to punish Mr. Daibunmasatsu. Please report to the Principal's office. We'll speak with you shortly."
"Yes, ma'am," the redhead said. She turned and walked away.
"Now, Mr. Daibunmasatsu," Mrs. Morisato said, returning to the interrupted class, "what you did was very impolite." The kendoist had risen and was dusting himself off. He glanced at her with some irritation. "It seems that in your case, I must be firm." Her hands rose and slid gracefully through the air, which rippled in their wake. She spoke something that almost sounded like a haiku.
(BZZZZAKT!) Kogara toppled, spasming, singed and blackened by the powerful, if low amperage, electrical event. With wild eyes and trembling limbs, he staggered to his feet, shaking and wild-eyed. The class all stared at the mild, pleasant looking teacher. Most of them had forgotten that the principal did not hire teachers based on credentials and good manners.
"Mr. Daibunmasatsu, I hope you take this chastisement in the spirit in which it was administered and understand that such behavior cannot be tolerated. Please take your seat now. Your hall pass privilege is temporarily suspended."
Cabana Man laughed, strummed his ukulele and left Barry to stew in girl-type till the end of the day. When Miss Hinako wandered in, she was ready to take on everyone and hell with the consequences. It was a shock as Miss Hinako, instead of berating her or yanking out a coin, simply giggled, poured hot water over her, then led him to the auditorium.
"Miss Hinako, what's goin' on?"
"You'll find out, Ranma," she giggled. "Would you like a lolly? I find them calming..."
"Uhhh... No, thank you."
He was led up on stage before the entire assembled school to face Shampoo standing beside a lottery barrel, a device used to draw winners for contests. Seated behind a table on the stage were Mrs. Morisato, Mrs. Satamiya and Cologne, their 'Matriarchs'. The palm-treed fruitcake lounged in the wings. After placing him center stage, Miss Hinako skipped to her own seat beside the old ghoul and watched expectantly.
"Ranma," Shampoo acknowledged the pigtailed martial artist with a nod. "At the Assembly you miss this morning we establish how rules are enforced, how Student Council act like Amazon Council of Elders and how members of Administration will act as Matriarchs." Barry noted she was being very precise in her Japanese. "Amazon custom is founded on ancient traditions and laws based on those traditions and on experience. Like the Student Council, the village elders are older respected members of the Community. Not all are female, but most are. That beside point – is beside the point." She frowned at her slip then went on. "The Matriarchs are former Elders, more than 70 years old and always women, who are masters in at least three respected traditions. Elders are men or women, older than 50 years, and are elected for life or until they give up duty. Unlike here, there is no set number that can be Elders. Elders make the laws and act as judges. Matriarchs mostly act as teachers to the Community, but also have power to…" She paused searching for the concept. "Can veto new laws they do not like. That way any law must meet with approval of elders and approval of tradition." Barry's ears perked up at that. The political device for making or changing Amazon law had not been discussed in the booklet. "This is how tradition is defended."
'And unless a law was very well received, it is how tradition is forced on the younger generations,' thought Barry, interested. 'And how a stupid law like the kiss of marriage might drag on into modern times.' Shampoo held up a finger. "You notice I say Elders act as judges?"
He nodded impatiently.
Standing tall, Shampoo raised her hands toward the ceiling, palms up in supplication. "Hear me goddess and revered ancestors! Hear me honored Matriarchs of Fu-rin-ken and elected Elders. We stand in your presence that all may hear the decision of this court." Barry twitched and looked around. "Before you stands a member of this community, accused of acts of discord, property damage and disharmony."
"You mean me?" he demanded pointing to himself.
Shampoo didn't answer. "Some have accused Ranma of discord. He does not obey the rules demanding conformity of dress, respect for authority and it is alleged that he sleeps in class."
There was a nervous titter from the assembly. From the wings, Principle Kuno called out, "Da wahinis have it in fo' you brudda! Yo gonna get it now!"
"Ranma," Shampoo said, turning back to address him. "What say you?"
Barry thought fast. "I… I can't wear a regular uniform; it would fall off when I changed shape and a naked or half-naked girl would cause more trouble than wearin' stuff I can adjust. As for authority," he glared at Kuno, "I'll respect the respectable."
"And the charge of sleeping in class?"
"Urgh!" Barry grimaced. What had he gotten into? "Guilty… In the past, but I've been better, lately," he added. 'Damn! That sounded lame.'
"The Council of Elders will confer." Shampoo declared before retreating into a huddle with the other class officers.
Barry sweated. Principle Kuno sidled out and leered at him. "When you found guilty, guilty, guilty, I gonna snip, snip, snip yo hair little keiki!"
Barry snorted at him. "Feh! You'd need a tribe of Amazons ta hold me down, asshole. Don't make me hurt you." They both looked up as Shampoo returned.
"Ranma," Shampoo nodded to him. "Of the charges of discord, you are found not guilty of dress code violations, and not guilty of disrespecting authority."
"Hey, hey! What am I?" The tree-bearing Hawaii-phile protested. He wilted as Shampoo regarded him scornfully, then ignored him.
"You are found guilty of sleeping in class, but almost everyone agree you are doing better. You must consider yourself warned, however."
Barry tried to hide a sigh of relief, but tensed waiting for the 'other shoe' to drop.
"Do not forget you are also charged with property damage and disharmony," the Amazon reminded him. She abruptly cut him off with a raised hand as he began to protest. "Evidence and testimony say property damage caused by others…" Shampoo winced here, "Or in self defense when attacked. No one report Ranma damage something, otherwise."
Barry tensed a little more. Ranma's memories held a few items – he wasn't lily white in this regard but apparently had lucked out, witness-wise. Still, there was still one other charge – what had it been?
"What about me!" insisted Principle Nut-Job. "He kick me through roof assembly befo' las' an' break up all my sweet, sweet vis-u-al aides, yah! He do plenty damage, huh?" He danced in place like a little child needing to go yet wanting to stay.
Shampoo sighed pensively and rolled her eyes before going on. Ignored again, Kuno crashed to the floor in a massive face-fault of irrelevance. "Last charge is that of disharmony."
"Yeah! What's that about?" Her look said more than words. "I'm shutting up."
"Disharmony is about four women chasing one man."
"Hey! I never asked-" The look came his way, again. "I'm shutting up till you're done."
"All parties considered at fault for disharmony."
"All parties? Does that mean you girls-" Barry raised his hands defensively at her look. "I know! Shut up, Ranma!"
"You want to go back to discussing disrespecting authority?" Shampoo growled. "Otherwise, Don't interrupt!" She took a cleansing breath. "All students are upset by actions of Ranma and fiancées. It sets a bad example. Disharmony is not, however, strictly speaking, a violation of law. It is instead an affront to custom and tradition."
She glared as Barry, or Ranma to her eyes, as he opened his mouth then thought better of it. Barry was becoming intrigued despite himself. Shampoo looked like she was sucking lemons. "Also, because it matter of tradition, it custom of Matriarchs to find solution." Barry froze. That wasn't a good thing. Especially since…
"And that means me, sonny-boy," Cologne cackled, po-going over. "Your teachers and I discussed this at length. And you know? They agreed we could take you back to China with us." She looked up at Ranma's affronted glare and grinned. "That was a joke, sonny." She cracked her knuckles. "Actually, we're offering you a choice; the easy way is to choose the girl you want and the other three can get on with their lives." She smiled. A hair-raising sight under the circumstances.
"Yeah?" Barry growled. "And if my choice didn't suit you it might be unfortunate for someone, huh?" Damn it, he liked the old woman, but something about the way she was acting; He felt his aura flicker in instinctive response to a threat and fought it down. Ranma may have fought Saffron to the death and won, but Ranma knew very well that it had been luck more than skill that he had succeeded. Ranma might have taken on the old woman himself, but Barry lacked the experience and control. Mixing it up with Cologne would probably end up fatal for somebody.
"Why, whatever do you mean, son-in-law?" she said with big puppy-dog eyes. "Can't blame an old gal for trying," she added in a cheerful tone. "In that case, you could try option number two."
"And option two is?"
Cologne didn't answer directly. "You're very popular with the girls, sonny-boy. One of the opinions expressed at the Assembly was that your little harem didn't deserve you." She shrugged. "Of course, they don't know you like we do. In any case, option two is what we call back home the 'Grandmother Rain of Gentle Plum Blossoms' strategy." Cologne continued to smirk and even went so far as to pull out her pipe to begin tamping in tobacco. "It's a time honored technique for socializing young men too shy or to distracted by other affairs to the important business of noticing the opposite sex." She patted the lottery barrel which Barry now noticed was full of folded notes.
"You aren't serious." Barry growled. "There ain't no way! They can ask, but I can always say, n-"
"As this was a disciplinary action, your parents were contacted," Cologne spoke over his protests. "Your mother thought it was a lovely idea."
Barry froze. His mother? Ranma's mother? Nodoka of the silk-covered sword? "You gotta be kidding me."
"You can always choose…"
"I choose not to choose," Barry groaned. "Now how the hell is this supposed to work? And is this gonna affect our little deal?" he added a little disingenuously.
Cologne nodded. "Very thoughtful, Ranma. Here's how this goes. We're going to pull 22 names from the barrel. Each day you will treat that girl as if you were courting her."
"Courting her! I don't know how-"
"Trust me, we know. You may actually learn something other than martial arts for once! You will meet the first girl selected after assembly and take her on a date – she buys, as that's how it's done among Amazons. You will however, carry her books, help her with homework, walk her home…"
"Are you kidding me? I have other obligations!"
Cologne nodded. "And you will order your schedule, so that you can meet those obligations." She smirked. "True, It'll be a full schedule… But, don't you think you can handle it?"
Barry leaned forward aggressively. "I can handle anything!" Inside, he shivered. Where had that come from?
"You better watch what you handle, Ranma!" Shampoo warned, eyes snapping. "And who!" Barry frowned as he heard similar sentiments from three other individuals.
"Are you challenging me?" he said icily. He wondered what would happen if someone really tried to order Ranma not to date someone?
Shampoo blanched. "Um… No! Not that way! Just… hope you be gentlemans and not take advantage of silly girls who…" She let her jaw snap shut as her grandmother glared.
"We'll all trust in your honor, Ranma," Cologne added smoothly. She smirked as she heard three other voices mutter dangerously. Now, if her great-grandaughter could control herself, they might get somewhere.
"Oh, hell!" Barry muttered. If it hadn't been for Nodoka… Barry glared at the old woman suspiciously. "And there ain't no guy's names in there?"
Cologne laughed. "Not a one. Mind you, it had been suggested…"
Principal Kuno stepped out of the wings, learing. "I still say why let the keiki off so easy? I say as Big Kahuna, you go all de way!" The Principal struck a pose. "Make de keiki date every day of the month. AND put de keiki' names in de barrel, too. Saotome then date appropriately!" He grinned and danced in glee as the red-faced young man at center stage clenched his fists in rage and took a single aggressive step toward the idiot.
"Why, you palm tree pervert..."
The older women behind the table conferred and Mrs. Morisato nodded and rose. "Ranma, please stay where you are." She then spoke in a language that tickled the ears with familiarity. There was a flash. In the audience, Kogara flinched and ducked for cover.
Principal Kuno stood, balanced on one foot with a rictus-like smile present in a blackened face. Slowly, his palm tree split down the center and floated aside. His ukulele seemed to crumble into dust. He toppled face down, spasming. "Owie!"
Barry wasn't paying attention to his fallen adversary. His startled eyes were fixed on Baradandya Morisato. He had seen the flash of the static charge that dropped Principal Kuno. The ki flash, though, that had accompanied it had been unique with characteristics he had never observed in free electricity before. But even that was not what was so interesting. Mrs. Morisato aura had not given off any sign of performing a ki technique. There had been no buffering or focusing of her ki. The pretty Kasumi-like woman came across to both ordinary and ki senses as a perfectly normal, untrained human being.
Given what he had just observed, she had to be anything but.
"Ranma?" Shampoo's voice broke into his thoughts. "Ranma?"
He shook himself. It looked like he'd have to hold that thought. "What?"
"We draw now for dates. Twenty-two women get date by lottery." She looked like she was going to cry.
"I don't mean anything personal by it, Shampoo," he reassured her. "Is everybody's name in there? You know?" His eyes asked.
She nodded.
"Well, good luck, then!"
Shampoo stepped back and nodded. Surprisingly, her face had cleared at his words. He hoped he hadn't encouraged her. The 'Matriarchs' stood up from the table and advanced to the lottery barrel. Mrs. Satamiya turned the handle and tumbled the tickets over and over. Barry judged there were a couple hundred tickets in there. Miss Hinako and Mrs. Morisato took turns drawing names from the barrel.
Hiroko Watanabe was the first pick. The slender dark-haired girl with glasses came up on stage beside Barry and shot him an indecipherable glance. She was not from Ranma's homeroom, and looking at her, Barry decided she must be a junior or freshman. Barry didn't recognize very many of the names.
Barry heard the name of Sayuri Jijumatsu, one of Akane's friends, when it was pulled and wondered why she would want to date Ranma. He suppressed a smile when to her delight, Shampoo's name was picked.
Moments later, the name Mio Saratalova came up. Barry was really puzzled over that one. The girl was into the occult big time and transferred out of Ranma's homeroom when a prediction she had made had not gone as expected. She was, unfortunately perhaps, not a popular girl in the school, her Russian-sounding name and peculiar activities keeping others at a distance. She found Akane's group more understanding of her strangeness, until Happosai crossed her path and she found seclusion to be preferable to molestation.
The twenty-first pick was Ukyo, who looked totally unimpressed. Barry found himself holding his breath. Akane's name had not yet been picked and this was the last chance. He glanced toward her to see how she was reacting to the whole situation. He found her sitting tensely in her seat between Kodachi and Ukyo. His eyes flipped back to the hand coming out of the barrel.
"The twenty-second name is... Sora Engleton."
Barry managed to school his expression to neutrality. In his mind, only Ukyo was a safe date. Then he looked down at the audience again and saw Kodachi's sly smile. Forget what he thought. None of the dates were going to be safe. 'Ranma,' he thought to himself, 'because of you, I'm seeing hell!'
"Where would you like to go, Watanabe-san? Hey! Are you related to Mr. Watanabe who used to teach here?" he asked suddenly, making the connection with Ranma's neurons.
"Yes!" It was said grimly.
Barry looked down at the thin face behind large glasses. He could tell this 'date' was not going to be much fun. "Your father?" She nodded. He wasn't certain of the source of her animosity, but would not be at all surprised if fallout from one of Ranma's problems hadn't caused the timid and excitable instructor some grief. He regarded her and nodded again. "Let me see some folks and then we'll go somewhere to talk, okay?"
She nodded again tightly and he walked to the front of the stage.
"Well, that was strange." He knelt and spoke as the fiancées joined him at the center stage. Ukyo looked angry; Kodachi, unconcerned. Shampoo looked both fearful and exultant. Akane was pensive and wouldn't meet his eyes.
"I really wish there were another way out of this."
"There was, Ranma," Kodachi said. "You could have chosen one of us."
"I won't be pushed, Kodachi," he said sternly. "I'll choose when I'm ready." He met each one of the girl's eyes. "I want yer promises not to interfere."
"Ohohohohohoho!" Kodachi answered.
"What!" exclaimed Shampoo. "Why should we interfere?"
Barry glared at them. They shifted uncomfortably and looked at one another.
"You better not have any plans," warned Ukyo.
"I don't. But do you believe me?" They all exchanged glances again. They looked at him. Only Akane didn't involve herself in the discussion.
"Of course we trust you, Ranma-darling."
"Certainly!"
"You be a good date to the other girls. Not too good date, but..." He noticed Ukyo did not include herself in the discussion either, but watched him with narrowed eyes. He smiled as if accepting the assurances and walked back to the 'date'.
"Oh, well," he breathed.
"Something wrong?" his date asked. He looked sidewise at her then back at the fiancées.
"Don't be surprised if our date isn't the nice chewin' out you wanna give me," he warned.
"Are you trying to chase me off?"
"Nah," he said. "They probably won't do anything too bad."
"Why would they do anything at all?"
He gave her a surprised look. "Have you been hiding under…? Sorry. Look, Watanabe-san, I have two top-level martial artists who want to marry me, regardless of what they have to do to their competition. Two more tend to be violent to me because they blame me if anyone else acts affectionate, whether I asked for it or not. There are any number of other martial artists, kami, ghosts, ninja, and so on, who would like to see me dead on the off-chance I might threaten them someday." He grinned. "If any of 'em show up, head for cover. I'll hold 'em off."
She stared at him for a long time. "You have a weird sense of humor," she complained finally. "No one has that weird of a life."
"And lives to tell of it?" Barry finished for her. "Sure they do. Until somethin' catches up with 'em and they don't live to tell about it. That just hasn't happened yet."
"I..." She hesitated. "I was going to bring you over to my house. After I chewed you out, I mean. I wanted you to apologize to my dad."
"That'd work real good, provided we don't get ambushed because someone misunderstands what ya had in mind," Barry finished. "How 'bout I write him a note? Ta be honest, though, I don't know that I ever did anythin' bad to him... aside from fallin' asleep in class."
She glared at him again.
"Okay, okay! What did I do?"
She continued to glare.
"Hiroko, I'm not gonna have a prayer of makin' amends if I don't know what's wrong."
"Let's just go have a snack at a shop near my house," she suggested. "Maybe your memory will be a little better with some food in your stomach."
The coffee shop was one Ranma frequented, almost always in girl-type. They had good meals and great desserts. Barry's mouth watered as he viewed the offerings but sighed and chose a bowl of ramen as default. Ranma came here for the ice cream. Barry didn't have the option of going in girl-type to really enjoy it. He looked about. Same customers, same counters, booths and tables… The paint on the one wall covered the patch where Shampoo burst in after him, and there was still a dent where Ryoga smashed Ranma's head against the wall during an abortive date with Akane. The owner didn't recognize him. Ranma's boy-type hadn't been in often enough to cause him trouble …yet.
"Okay," Barry said slurping his ramen, "we're here. I'm supposed ta have a big revelation, right?"
"Yes!"
"Sorry, I'm not."
"I don't believe you," she said angrily. "It was right here at this table! You were in girl-type!"
Barry pointed over to a line of booths along a wall. "I usually am when I'm here. I sit with Akane over there. As for girl-type..." His lips twitched. "Ice cream tastes better for some reason, and they have these great sundaes and ices here." His eyes grew distant. Hiroko smacked her head in exasperation.
"Dammit, Ranma!" she said and clapped a hand over her mouth. Apparently she didn't use harsh language very often. "About a year ago, you were in here. My father and my mother were having an argument and my mother walked off to the washroom. When she came back, you were finishing off her ice cream and making eyes at my father."
"What?" Barry said. "I was not!"
"Do. You. Remember. Meeting. My. Father. Here?" Hiroko demanded, staccato.
Barry thought. He ransacked Ranma's memories. He hunted down the various pathways. And came up empty. It was the first time he had done so when really trying. He looked at Hiroko Watanabe and shook his head. "Sorry. I really don't remember it, Hiroko. I might have, I admit. If there was a loose sundae goin' to waste, well... When yer used to eatin' stewed roadkill, the fact that someone nibbled a little..."
"You did what?" she asked horrified.
Barry looked at her uncertainly. He was sure her horror had nothing to do with stolen or conned sundaes. "Hiroko, ya heard the reason that Shampoo and Ukyo are fiancées is because Pops and I ate the wrong things at the wrong time?"
"Huh?"
He sighed. "I really don't wanna go inta all that. All I can say is I mighta done what ya said. I don't really pay much attention ta faces if there's food around."
"How can you live like that?" she asked aghast.
"It's better'n dyin'," he answered simply.
Hiroko Watanabe regarded the young man across from her with extremely mixed emotions. Here was a handsome young man, devilishly so when he smiled and innocently so when his face was grave or sad, which he was at the moment. It occurred to her that it could just be an act. But… She shivered. She was not here to add to the confusion. She reached across and laid her hand on his.
(Crack!)
Hiroko gasped at the suddenly hard expression on Ranma's face and the silk ribbon he had caught in his hand. She looked over her shoulder to meet the eyes of Kodachi Kuno. She gulped.
"'Dachi, she wasn't makin' a pass at me! Knock it off!"
"I'm sorry I cannot agree with you, Ranma-darling. Obviously, she plans to add herself to your following."
"Give her credit for some common sense!" He jerked to get some slack in the ribbon and twitched his wrist, wrapping several loops about the black-clad woman.
"Oh, Ranma! How forceful!"
"Can it, Kodachi," Ranma said. "This is exactly the kinda stuff I was talkin' about. How do ya justify goin' after a little girl like this?" Hiroko scowled at the 'little girl' comment. "She can't defend herself against you. Actin' like this just make ya look like a bully."
"Oh, come now, Ranma. Amazons duel all the time! I've heard Shampoo talk about it often enough."
"Didn't ya read the handbook?" the pigtailed boy retorted. "That's Amazon warriors. Hiroko's not a warrior!"
"How long would it take to become one?" Hiroko grated. She really didn't like the way she was being evaluated and would have loved to plant one on Kodachi's sneering face. She had been a bit in awe of Kodachi's grace and poise, but that initial impression was rapidly going down in flames.
"Oh, pu-lease! Don't be ridiculous," Kodachi exclaimed, acknowledging Hiroko's existence for the first time. "It takes years of constant practice! The top martial artists in Nerima have trained from the time they could walk! You will never..."
"That's enough, Kodachi," Ranma snapped. Another twitch and the Black Rose spun dizzily like a top. He caught her arm to keep her from tipping over. "After ya get your balance back, meet me at the dojo. We're gonna have a long talk about this... and other things." Turning, he scooped Hiroko up and shot out of the shop like a bullet. It took the girl almost a minute to realize she was being carried over the rooftops of Nerima. She barely stifled a scream.
"How are you doing this... carrying me?"
"Huh? Yer not heavy. I carried my old man. Now that's a load!"
"My bookbag," Hiroko said, looking back the way they had come. She really didn't want to meet Kodachi any time soon.
"I got it," her transportation grunted as he ran up a particularly steep roof. He launched them into space.
"It's like flying," Hiroko squealed, beginning to enjoy the ride. Then they seemed to ricochet off walls and glided across two more rooftops, before landing in a garden. She laughed. She had never enjoyed roller coasters, but she was going to try them again after this.
"Mrs. Morisato and her little sister helped lay this out," Barry said, pointing to the Tendo pond and garden. "This is Akane's house, by the way. The dojo's around the other side."
"Ranma? If you haven't chosen Akane, why do you stay here?" Hiroko asked suddenly.
Barry 'urk'ed and turned, thinking fast. "It's an arranged situation, Hiroko. We weren't asked. First I knew about it was half an hour before I met Akane. I was just a couple a weeks from my dunkin' in Jusenkyo and all I wanted was ta find a cure. I guess things didn't get off to a good start." He ran a hand nervously over the back of his head. He didn't want to get into a situation where he was answering for Ranma or for himself on something like this. "Why don't we go inta the dojo—!" The opening of the shoji interrupted him.
"Oh, Ranma," Kasumi stood in the doorway. "I didn't know you were out here." She saw Hiroko and bowed politely. Hiroko nervously returned the gesture. "Who is your friend?"
"This is Hiroko Watanabe, Kasumi. Hiroko, this is Kasumi Tendo. Kasumi, Amazon Month seems to have turned into 'Date Ranma Days', and Hiroko's ticket was pulled for today." Kasumi sighed at him in exasperation. He hurried on. "Did you have Mr. Watanabe as an instructor when you were in school, Kasumi?" Barry had never seen Kasumi provoked and didn't want to start.
"Why, yes, I did," said Kasumi brightening. "He taught English before Miss Hinako. Is he well, Hiroko-san?"
"Yes, thank you, Kasumi-san." Hiroko looked at her again. "You look an awful lot like Mrs. Morisato. Is she a relative?"
"Thank you, Hiroko, but no, Baradandya Morisato is not a relative. She is sweet and I consider her a friend." Kasumi smiled then waved them in. "Please be welcome in our home. May I fix you some tea?"
"I feel dirty," Hiroko complained as Kasumi went into the kitchen.
"Kami, why?" laughed Barry. "It ain't like she held her nose or asked ya ta take a bath..."
"No. But her little sister is your fiancée and I helped push you into taking the other girls, including me, on dates."
"Hiroko, the dates mean nothin' ta me. There's only three girls with any hold on my honor — Akane, Shampoo and Ukyo."
"What about Kodachi?"
"She sorta glued herself ta me and I can't convince her ta let go."
"Oh."
Barry grinned, then looked distant. "And there she is comin' over the wall to the dojo." Hiroko looked around, trying to see how he was 'seeing' Kodachi.
"You're joking. Aren't you?"
"Nope! She's in the dojo right now."
"Who is, Ranma?" Kasumi inquired, coming back with the tea.
"Kodachi is, Kasumi."
"Oh! I'll make some of those muffins she likes. Could you invite her in, Ranma?" Kasumi turned and headed for the kitchen again. Hiroko gaped after her.
"Kasumi's like that; she's the nicest person in the world. But she ain't a carpet ta walk on. Nobody messes with oneechan here." He rose to his feet. "I'll get Kodachi. Just ignore what she did earlier. Yer safe here. She won't try nothin' around Kasumi."
Kodachi performed a kata of her Art in the center of the dojo. Barry felt the dark roil of her emotions and watched her use of a hoop carefully. Rhythmic Gymnastics is a beautiful demonstration of the flexibility, coordination and strength of the female human body. In many respects, it is unmatched by any other sport in the demands it makes on its performers. The martial arts version of the sport was artificial to Ranma's eyes, but he had nothing to say about the skills it taught its practitioners. With her weapons, she was every bit as lethal as Ukyo and, while Ukyo was faster and tougher, Kodachi had a degree of flexibility approached only by Shampoo. Even Akane admitted that Kodachi moved like silk, and both she and Barry used Kodachi as a template to improve their own flexibility.
Barry watched her cartwheel and spin. The hoop, not her favorite weapon perhaps, seemed to flow with her from side to side, sometimes used like a weird circular club, sometimes a shield she flowed through like water. He noted she was doing her work barefoot, a practice she had only recently begun, her elegant toes occasionally gripping the hoop with dexterity and strength, spinning and tossing it accurately through a routine she had devised herself. Someday, if she got a little saner, he'd like to see what she'd do with nunchuku or Chinese short swords.
Suddenly, her body twisted and the hoop shot horizontally like a huge throwing star, which, with its suddenly protruding saw edge, it was. Barry noted she had flung it while inverted, using her foot as the launching engine. It ripped through the air, through a straw target set at the end of the dojo and sank inches deep into a wooden beam beyond. Barry winced, but applauded as if untroubled. He learned early on that to show concern for her lethal abilities was to encourage her to use them. She finished a smooth backward somersault and rolled to her feet. She smiled and blushed with pleasure, and Barry felt the turmoil in her aura subside. It was too bad it wouldn't last. What she did earlier had to be nipped in the bud.
"Nice work, 'Dachi. Little hard on the dojo though."
Kodachi laughed depreciatingly. "If I must, I must." She walked with him to get the glue and sawdust they mixed to patch wood. After the initial argument, she was quite faithful in repairing damage she caused, even when her own body had been the cause of the damage.
"Where is the little tram—! I mean… the lucky winner?"
Barry got down to business at that point. "Kodachi, that was uncalled for."
"What was?"
"Attackin' Hiroko. She ain't a martial artist, she ain't interested in me and, more important, I ain't interested in her."
"Why did she put her name in then?" snapped Kodachi, yanking her hoop out of its seat in the beam.
"Her father is a former teacher. She wanted ta bawl me out for givin' him a tough time." He met her surprised look and let her run that concept through her mind.
"I've made a fool of myself, haven't I?" Kodachi said, turning away and beginning to apply the sawdust-and-glue filler with strong swipes of an old spatula of Ukyo's Barry liberated. Barry refrained from sighing with relief. Kodachi was a far cry from her original self-justified violence, but still had to be treated with careful applications of positive and negative reinforcement. If only they could find someone for her who could live up to her expectations.
He laid a hand gently on her shoulder. "Kodachi, ya know ya ain't in the runnin' fer me. I said it often enough. Whydja torture yerself like this?"
"Ranma, I treasure every moment I have with you. I wish you felt the same way about me," she said, smoothing the patch she had made. "It is so hard when I watch you with the others. When my name failed to turn up in the lottery..." A single tear ran down her cheek.
"Kodachi," Barry did sigh then, "part a the problem is that yer so damn sneaky I don't know if yer showin' me yer heart or fakin' it again. But ya just can't do this any more. Someone'll get hurt or killed, the way you play, and not even the Kuno name will keep ya from payin' the legal price."
"Do you worry about me so much?" Kodachi said dramatically.
"I worry about everyone, 'Dachi." Barry said. "And if yer gonna try to hurt or kill anyone who touches me, I'm gonna hafta gift wrap ya for Sasuke and Dr. Whosit. I don't wanna do that, especially if he's as big a jerk as he seems. But if yer gonna hurt people who can't defend themselves, I gotta."
"I understand." Kodachi's eyes were on the floor.
"Kasumi's makin' muffins." Barry said softly.
Her eyes came up suddenly, startled.
"If yer nice to Hiroko, help with homework maybe, ya can stay fer dinner."
"So that's it," Kodachi said looking at him down her nose. "You don't want to be shown lacking in your scholarly pursuits." She turned and marched into the house. "And you call me sneaky!"
Barry followed along, just to be sure, and hoped Kodachi hadn't figured out that he was trying to find ways for her to interact with her peers instead of intimidating them.
As Kodachi marched down the hall and past the entryway, Akane came in the front door.
"Good afternoon, Tendo," Kodachi said pausing.
"Good afternoon... Kodachi, what are you doing here?"
"I followed Ranma-darling home. Can he keep me?"
"What? No, he can't! I thought he was out with the Watanabe girl?"
"Well, I was, "said Barry, following Kodachi in, "but I got a little nervous about goin' to Hiroko's house. I think Mr. Watanabe had enough of me when he taught us in school."
"Oh, that Watanabe," Akane said, her hand clapping over her mouth. She glanced suspiciously at Kodachi who smiled too innocently. "You were trying to break up the date, weren't you?" she accused.
"Guilty!" sang out the Black Rose as she passed into the main room.
Akane glowered after her.
"It went better'n expected," Barry said quietly. "But I figured it'd be safer ta bring her here, so no one could say I was up ta somethin'."
Akane turned, looked at him and guiltily turned away.
"Too bad yer name wasn't picked, tomboy," Barry said. "It woulda given me a break..."
"I... didn't put my name in," she muttered, her eyes on the floor.
Barry looked at Akane and dropped out of Ranma's character. "Do you want to talk about it, sweetheart?"
"I... No. Yes! I don't know."
"How about tonight on the roof," Barry suggested, "after everyone's gone home?"
Journal: Ranma's Guest — Tuesday, 01 October 1991- Day 38
Wow! What a day!
Ryoga's parents showed up. I think it's the first time they've all been in one place in six years. The hot water tank was broken, so I helped clean things up and found something interesting in the process. Did you know Ryoga's rich? I don't just mean he's well off. I mean his immediate family could buy the Kunos about five or six times over! All of their stuff is in investments handled by trusted long-term firms. How do I know? The hot water tank flooded the storage area where they kept their old records. True, my information is about ten years out of date, but what I saw is awful hard to disperse when the whole family wanders around all the time. Lord! If Nabiki finds out, she'll be after him for sure! I really wish I didn't need to write this down, but I promised I would faithfully record everything of significance, in case you couldn't remember what happened when you weren't here.
Let's see: Mrs. Morisato did something funny with ki and fried Principal Kuno. It was also the first day of Amazon Month. The 'Council' decided to require Ranma to chose one fiancée or date all comers. Since they invoked your mother's name I went along and chose to date all comers. I don't want to choose for you, even if I do know whom you would choose. The first, today, was Hiroko Watanabe, Watanabe-sensei's daughter? She wanted to chew you out about an incident with ice cream...
Barry sat on his futon and detailed what he surmised about the incident.
Apparently, Mrs. Watanabe thought her husband was trying to pick up a student and very nearly divorced him over the incident. Hiroko nearly ran afoul of Kodachi, who was acting jealous again. The Black Rose is getting better, but still has her moments. I spoke firmly with her and then with the others, just to be sure we were on the same page. I visited the Watanabe's once it was clear we weren't going to be attacked by one of them and spoke with Mrs. Watanabe, demonstrating your curse and explaining that we're just not interested that way. She slapped me; a good, solid right cross that Akane would have been proud of, and ranted at me for nearly ruining their marriage. We are, of course forbidden ever to see their daughter again, so I didn't have to worry about dodging a good night kiss, even if Hiroko had wanted to give one.
Akane is having trouble with all this. She put in a blank entry because she couldn't bring herself to 'date' me, not that I blame her. It would have given me a safe night; but what's done is done.
We talked about her fears. Apparently, Ukyo wasn't quite as good a confidant as we might have hoped. She's deathly afraid I mean to take your body and strand you wherever you are. She keeps feeding Akane's doubts. Ryoga is a good listener; but as a reassuring presence, he's less than ideal. He doesn't dare offer a shoulder, in case Akane misunderstands... or he does. I don't think he's quite over Akane yet, mostly because Akari, sweet as she is, just doesn't really click with him. I'm working dinner rush at Ucchan's. Your mom's covering the lunch rush, now that Konatsu is handling the yatai at the university. More about that later.
Anyway, I ended up promising to draw some pictures of my family for Akane and she ended up crying on my shoulder. I hope that you either read this or have full memory, so you understand my motivations and hers. Don't stick your foot in it, okay? All I did was lend a shoulder; all she did was cry and work out some of her fears. We haven't had a chance to do that since all the gang got involved in the ki-thing. Our nightmares have been interesting. Akane has a pole beside her door now, too. It's much safer than shaking her out of a bad one.
Her biggest fear is that you won't come back. Her second biggest one is, I think, that you'll have taken the opportunity to gain some 'worldly experience' and won't care for her anymore. There, I can't help her. I don't believe you'll take advantage of the situation, but you also hate to confide. My wife can be very persuasive, as I'm sure you've found out, if you haven't told her you are there. Worse for Akane, though I haven't told her, is that Gwen is very similar in many respects to Ukyo. On my end, maybe it's a good thing Ukyo is hostile; reduces temptation.
Please! I hope you haven't broken up my marriage. I can forgive practically anything else.
Also! Maybe I should suggest to Akane that she write letters to you as if you were in another town visiting. It might help to reduce her depression at the daily delays.
Oh, yes… We will get you back. Baka!