Disclaimer: We do not own anything related to or in Angel.
Authors Notes: This fanfiction was inspired by our own stupidity and twisted minds.
Based on: Our own cookie making experience, er, exagerated a bit.
Set in: Season 5 (Assume Cordelia isn't in a coma). Angel and Gunn are house sitting for Cordy, while keeping an eye on Dennis. Wesley had an allergic reaction and ended up in Wolfram&Hart's sick bay, so they're watching Illyria as well
10 Minutes Later
The stove timer went off.
"Time to get the cookies out!" Gunn hopped up and ran over to the oven, Angel cut infront of him and grabbed the oven mitts. Gunn crossed his arm's and Angel pulled the cookies out of the oven and started putting them on one of the metal racks.
"I get to scoop the cookies out this time." Gunn said grabbing the spoon, Angel went back to the table to make sure the cookies were cooling properly.
"Angel, do you want a large or a medium?" Gunn asked grinning from ear to ear.
"Uh, large." Angel said absently mindedly looking over the instructions.
"Okay!" A few minutes later the oh so familiar 'Thud' came from the oven.
"What are you doing." Angel said not taking his eyes off the fifteenth 'combined' on the page.
"Putting the cookies in the oven..." Gunn quickly started to slam the pan into the oven.
'CRASH' This time Angel noticed.
"What happened?" He got up and headed towards the oven.
"The 'Slam' pan 'Slam' won't fit 'Slam'." Angel stared at the extremely large cookies that were placed a few inch's from each other and then concentrated on the problem at hand.
"What do you mean it won't fit!" Angel grabbed the pan and started to shove it violently into the oven.
"It fits! It just fit!" Gunn grabbed one corner and looked at Angel.
"You're going to break the oven, it's already dented." Angel tried again and now they were ticked off.
"You grab one corner, I'll get the other." They each grabbed a corner and pulled back to shove it into the over, The pan was pulled from their hands. The pan turned itself sideways and then slid carefully into the oven.
"Um..." Angel said staring as the oven door closed.
"I knew that..." Gunn said walking away from the oven and muttering embarressedly.
5 minutes later
"ANGEL THEY'RE MATING!" Angel jumped over the couch and ran into the kitchen, closely followed by an excited Illyria.
"What?" He asked running over to the oven and peering in.
"Move!" Gunn shoved him away from the oven, He grabbed the oven mitt and yanked it open to reveal to very smooshy cookies sliding together in the oven.
"Oh." Angel said calming down, Gunn however wrenched the pan out of the oven and began using the spatula to press the cookies apart and flattening the sides in the process.
"Put them back in, the oven's still running and if worse comes to worse you can just hack them apart." He said and put the cookies back in the oven.
"That sounds painful." Gunn said grimacing at the thought.
"If we can battle a grinshlar demon, we can cut cookies." He put the oven mitt back on the counter.
"But they're mating!" Angel rolled his eyes and the three of them (Gunn, Angel and Illyria) went back into the living room to watch the cooking channel.
"6 minutes later and now we take the cake out of the oven." The television chef demonstrated and set his perfectly shaped cake on the table, Gunn&Angel stared in awe.
"Don't you have to take your cooking out of the oven?" Gunn shook his head.
"Not 'til the timer goes off." He said and continued to watch this cooking master frost the cake.
20 minutes later 'BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP'
"What's that smell?" Illyria said, her face looking confused. Gunn sniffed the air and his eyes went wide, he turned to Angel and they both shouted in unison.
"COOKIES!"
Authors giggle maniacally. Oh how we love to torture them. It is quite fun actually. Please review!