Jon sat on the park bench every day for as long as he could so that the woman would know where to find him in case she changed her mind about the date. At first, Garfield had to be dragged away from his bed and the fridge but when Jon bought him enough food to shut him up he was more than willing to come along.
Jon sprang off the bench as soon as he saw her walk by again.
"Changed your mind?"
"What? Oh – it's you," she said.
Jon puffed up his chest and deepened his voice. "I knew you'd be back. No woman can resist the charms of Jon Q. Arbuckle. So, pretty lady, what say you and I paint the town red tonight?"
"Please," she said. "I liked you better when you weren't doing your macho posturing."
Jon instantly reverted to his normal self.
"How long have you been waiting on that park bench?" she asked.
"Three weeks," said Jon proudly. "But I'd wait longer than that just to get a date with you."
Jon thought that she would swoon into his arms, but she only looked at him with pity. "You really waited that long?"
"Of course," said Jon. "You said you'd look for me on the park bench if you changed your mind, so that's where I've been. I didn't want you to miss me if you came looking."
The woman looked stunned, then burst into laughter. "You poor man – I didn't mean for you to wait!"
"So you weren't going to reconsider, then?" asked Jon, crestfallen.
"No," she said – but she said it slowly, as though she had indeed reconsidered it.
"Well then, will you at least tell me your name?"
"My name?"
Yes. Please. Any name. Make up a name, I don't care," said Jon desperately. "So I know what to call you in my daydreams."
She laughed. "Jon, I can't decide whether you're incredibly creepy or incredibly sweet."
"It's the last one," he said. "Please?"
"My name – my real name – is Lisa Lynne."
"Thank you," said Jon, relishing his tiny victory.
"I've got to be going. See you around. But for God's sake, don't wait for me on any more park benches!" she quickly added.
Jon watched her go, wondering how much lower he could sink. Going from begging a woman for a date to begging a woman just to tell him her name. And celebrating when she finally did!
Jon heard whimpering. He looked down and saw Odie amidst a sea of empty wrappers and plastic cups. Odie's tongue was tied to one of the legs of the bench and he was struggling to free himself. Far away, a fat orange blob was chasing a gaggle of frightened geese, leaving a trail of mangled daisies in his wake.
"GARFIELD!"