It's All Relative
Chapter 10: Disastrous Homecoming
By Teala373
When Bruce reached the last step and walked into the den, he wasn't surprised at the scene that lay before him. He had to remain calm and be the voice of reason.
Tim was confused. He had been throughout his investigation. It had been a devastating blow to him when he concluded that Mary was not Barbara. He was furious with himself for making such a horrid error.
'Had I been wrong to think they weren't one and the same,' he thought as he watched the scene unfold.
Terry found himself rooted to the spot he had skidded to a stop in. His eyes darted back and forth between the two figures in front of him. They were staring at each other very intently. In Terry's mind, this should be the first time either had seen the other, but they weren't acting like it.
Dick was shocked. He was ecstatic and pained, confused and enraged. He was so many different emotions that his spinning mind eventually just started shutting down.
Mary McGuiness, the woman who had recently discovered she was in fact Barbara Gordon, stood defiantly, masking her fear and apprehension.
Ace sat back on his haunches, watching all the players carefully. Though by their scents, he didn't deem any of them a threat, he was picking up on the sizzling tension in the air.
"I've come for my son," she announced, more to Bruce than to anyone else, yet her eyes stayed locked with Dick's.
Clearing his throat, Bruce stepped forward. "Perhaps we should all sit down and discuss this."
"There's nothing to discuss," came a cold reply.
Terry swallowed a lump in his throat. "Mom? What's going on?"
She noted the strange emotion that briefly flickered across Dick's face when Terry had addressed her. She tore her eyes from his and looked at her son.
"You were never meant to come here," her voice fell low, losing the hardened edge, "the irony of it all…"
Terry shook his head slightly, trying to make the surreality of the moment go away. "What are you talking about?"
Her eyes steeled slightly. "My memories have… been reinstated. I remember who I was and then realized who you had become."
"Wait, wait," Terry held out his hands in a defensive gesture, "you mean you don't have amnesia anymore and that helped you realize that I was helping Mr. Wayne and his friends clean out the basement…"
"Stop," she spat, narrowing her eyes, "no more of your cover stories. I know!"
He shrugged, trying to act unfazed. "Don't you even want to hear my rationale for why the door is behind the clock?"
She shook her head disapprovingly. "Where you learned to use humor in such situations is beyond me."
"I guess this is the part where I figure out you're Barbara Gordon," Terry lowered his eyes and tried to stop the million thoughts racing through his brain, "the Batgirl and the Oracle."
Bruce stepped forward again, forcing himself into the center of the odd circle there were standing in. "And this is the part where we talk." He motioned towards the living room.
She locked eyes briefly with Tim before turning to walk with Terry into the living room. Tim followed silently, calculations still running in his head.
Dick numbly began to move forward, but a firm, yet somehow gentle, hand caught his elbow and pulled him back further in to the den.
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Terry's left leg bounced up and down with a nervous energy as he watched his mother and Tim Drake exchange empty pleasantries while they all waited for Bruce and Dick.
He hadn't immediately recognized Tim Drake's name or face when he first saw him, but now he knew who he was. He had been a very close friend of his mother's, one that Warren hadn't approved of. He had disappeared when Terry was young, but he had left something behind.
"I came here to confront my past and gain closure before I came to see you," Tim emitted a nervous cough, "I didn't realize how much closure I'd be getting."
The red head smiled knowingly and reached over to take his hand. "No matter what happened, you and I will see things through."
"So, you were the second Robin," Terry began, quick to change the subject. He felt oddly uncomfortable with his mother's last statement.
Tim nodded. He began to say something, but Terry cut him off.
"And you just quit doing that so you could follow my mom around while she had amnesia. That's pretty weird," he clipped out with biting sarcasm.
"Terry!" came his mother's reprimand.
"No, it's okay," Tim began calmly, " it is all very weird. Your Mom and I were very close. I didn't handle it well when she disappeared and was presumed dead. I took off to try and rebuild. Staying in Gotham hurt too much. I met a girl," his face darkened then, "her name was Cassandra Cain. It was love at first sight. We moved to Washington and that's where I stumbled across your mom. I thought for sure she was Barbara, but none of my research showed that. In the meantime, though, we had developed a strong friendship. I began to let go of my hope that Barbara was alive. I began to live only for the present. Then… everything went downhill… and it turned out I was wrong. Mary and Barbara were one and the same…"
Terry hung his head as low as his neck would allow it. He hadn't meant to be so defensive, he was just afraid. His parents had always provided him with security. Even after Warren died, he wasn't afraid, only angry. This was the first time that he could remember ever truly being scared for himself.
A gear shifted in his mind and began to turn, spinning others as it went. Terry closed his eyes and tried to stop it, but they kept turning… Warren McGuiness wasn't his father. Barbara Gordon was the true identity of his mother. Someone in this house could be his father. The most likely candidate was Dick Grayson.
Bruce and Dick walked in then. Bruce took a seat next to Tim while Dick continued walking towards the far wall. He leaned up against it and glared at the back of Tim's head.
Terry watched Dick intently, trying to catch his eye. He had immediately liked Dick Grayson and bonded with him instantly. Now he knew why. He wanted him to be his father. He needed him to be his father. He sunk back into the cushions of the sofa and remained silent.
Barbara closed her eyes and pinched the bridge of her nose as Bruce began to patiently ask her to reiterate her story. She was going to have to flub and edit it a bit to avoid hostile confrontation. She needed to do what was necessary to get herself and her son out of there.
Dick couldn't believe how calm she was acting as she told them her story. His mind was reeling. He just wanted to grab her and hold her – never let her go so she couldn't slip through his fingers again. He wanted to scream. She had been married to someone else. She had two sons…
But she had woken in the hospital already pregnant with Terry. He wondered if Terry was his son or if there had been someone else…
He had received a stern, though sympathetic lecture from Bruce. They had to discover the truth and not scare her away. The only way he could keep his mouth shut was to brood over in the corner of the large sitting room.
She told them how she awoke in the hospital with no memory. She was told her name was Mary McGuiness, she was married to Warren and she was pregnant. Because she had to keep her stress low and concentrate on the baby, Terry, she did not worry about the past, concentrating only on the present and the future.
"Why was your name changed to Mary?" Bruce asked, trying to hide his frustration with her simple story.
"I guess there were people after us and we had to be protected."
"What people?"
"I don't know," she was starting to become visibly agitated. "Not all of my memories are back. All I know is it had something to do with a case that Warren, Ted, Wonder Woman and myself were involved with."
Bruce narrowed his eyes. "Warren and Ted?"
"Yes. Warren worked for Ted at Kord, Inc. That's how I met him."
The eyes stayed narrowed. "Barbara, that doesn't make any sense. You didn't know Ted Kord as Barbara Gordon. You only knew him as Batgirl and Oracle."
"Well, I guess the cat came out of the bag at some point."
Bruce rose, using his cane to help him. "None of this was in the case file Diana gave me when you disappeared."
She rose to meet his eye. "Listen, I'm still not square on exactly what happened. I vaguely remember bits and pieces from the year of my disappearance. A lot of this was told to me by Diana."
"You've seen the princess?" It all was becoming clear to him now.
"She's the one who reinstated my memories."
Dark eyebrows slightly streaked with silver threads furrowed together.
Seventeen years may have passed, but Dick still knew the woman who stood not ten feet away from him. She was shielding something. She was afraid. She was angry. She was also devising some sort of plan, but for what, he didn't know. Bruce had warned him to stay silent and let him handle it. Taking a deep breath, he pursed his lips together.
"The point is," she continued impatiently, "is that I never wanted this for Terry. I remember talking to you distinctly about how I wanted a more normal life," her eyes hardened, "I need to talk with my son and sort things out with him and I need to pick up Matt."
Tim was also remaining quiet. This woman wasn't acting like the happy-go-lucky Mary McGuiness he had come to know over the years, nor her former self as Barbara Gordon. She was acting like a completely different person. He understood that all of this couldn't be easy for her to digest, but there seemed to be some other force driving her actions.
"Why don't I go with you to pick up Matt?" Tim asked as he also rose from his seat, "I should have never let it go as long as I did…"
"Tim," Barbara began sympathetically, the anger and frustration melting off her face, "it's not your fault. It was a difficult time and you made the best decision for him you could. You shouldn't be ashamed that you weren't able to give Matt the same life that I could."
Dick picked himself up from his heavy leaning on the wall and walked towards the group. "What are you two talking about?"
Tim turned to face him. "Matt McGuiness is my son." He sat back down as he briefly told them his tale. He told them how he fell in love with Cassandra and married her, but she had died giving birth to Matt. He couldn't raise Matt alone and relied heavily on Mary McGuiness for support. When he had a nervous breakdown, Mary sent him to a clinic and took Matt in. He realized he couldn't be a good father to Matt and worked out an arrangement with the McGuiness family before trying to piece his life back together. After years of therapy, he decided to confront his demons in Gotham before reconnecting with his son.
"It all started to catch up with me," he continued, his voice thick with emotion and his breathing becoming more labored. "I had never known my mother. My father was murdered in front of me. I had become a teenage vigilante with no sense of normalcy. I couldn't handle Barbara and Alfred's deaths. I began to think I had no future… that I would die in that costume… so I left. When I met Cass, she took all that pain away. I began to feel… normal. I told her about Barbara and she even helped me do some research on Mary. I was so hurt when I thought they weren't the same, but Cass helped me through it again. But when she died… I crashed again. I couldn't take care of Matt. I was afraid something horrible would happen to him. He was safer with Mary…" He covered his face with his hand, unable to say any more.
Barbara turned her eyes towards Bruce. "This is why I don't want my son here. I wanted to save him from this. Nothing good comes from being a hero."
Terry looked up at his mom. "I… I've got my own ride. I just need a minute and I'll meet you back home." He wanted to talk to his mother away from the others. He could also see she was holding much back.
Nodding, she walked over to Tim and placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "Whenever you're ready," she murmured before heading towards the door.
Bruce fell back in his seat and did his best to comfort Tim. "I'm sorry, Tim. I should have been there for you more," he whispered.
Tim raised his tear washed eyes. "No. It's not your fault. If I hadn't left, I would have never met Cass… and I needed to have met Cass. Everything happens for a reason. I'll never understand that reason, but I just want to move forward. I didn't come here to blame you. I came here to ask you to help me do that."
"Why don't we take a break," Bruce offered, rising again. "I want to show you something that you might find interesting."
Nodding, Tim mutely followed.
"I don't know what I'm more shocked at," Dick came to sit next to Terry, "everything that Tim went through or that Bruce is finally acting like the father we always wanted."
Terry didn't say anything for a moment, his brain sticking as he tried to formulate sentences. "It's kind of crazy, ya know. My brother is the son of Robin." He scrunched his face, embarrassed that was all he could come up with.
Placing a hand on Terry's arm, Dick looked at him very seriously. "Now it's time to find out if you're the son of a Robin, too."
Neither said a word for several moments.
Dick finally rose. "No matter what happens, I think you're a damn good Batman."
"Hey, wait!" An odd jolt of boldness sprung up from within Terry as he realized Dick was headed off to talk to his mother. "My mom was never… really in love with my dad… Warren… It was almost as if she was waiting for someone else, waiting for you, but she just couldn't remember. I think she's just scared or something now."
It had come out disconnected and not as smooth as he had wanted it too, but Dick got the message.
"It was never easy with your mom and me," he murmured before heading towards the door.
Terry closed his eyes and fell back into the couch. He felt like he was trapped in a very bad movie.
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He found her out in the driveway, fumbling through her purse.
"Babs!"
Her head jerked up at the sound of his voice. She looked like a deer caught in headlights. They stared at each other for a moment.
Swallowing a lump in his throat, Dick began rambling. "The last time I saw you, you said you loved me and I believed you. I can totally buy that you had an accident and had amnesia, but you were living with some guy because they had to protect you from a mission? I thought that you and Ted had been working on something routine? And I never heard of Warren McGuiness before? What the hell, Babs?"
He hadn't meant to be accusatory.
"I still don't understand myself… that year isn't clear to me." She was trying to be brave and calm, but she was beginning to slowly crumble.
He took a deep breath. "Walk with me in the gardens for a minute. Please? I just… I just want to talk to you."
Nodding numbly, she slowly walked with him to the garden path that Alfred had so lovingly attended to all his years in Wayne manor. The garden had since been in the care of a service. Barbara had once loved roaming among Alfred's beautiful creation, but now, the path seemed devoid of warmth and feeling.
"You're not going to like what I have to tell you," she began.
"So there is more to the story."
She avoided his eye. "Dick, I…"
Her words were lost as he crushed her against him. Her face found the hollow in his neck and collar where it fit so well. He was as warm and as dizzily intoxicating as she remembered. She had been fighting it so, but as she pressed against him, with his arms secured about her, she couldn't. A sob escaped her throat, chokedly. He brought up his hand to stroke her hair.
"I missed you, dammit," he whispered hoarsely.
Her lips trembled. She wanted to tell him she missed him, too, but the words stuck in her throat. Instead, she wriggled out of his grasp and stepped back.
"Things are not as they once were," she rasped, tears stinging in her eyes.
He looked in her with hurt and confusion. "Barbara… I can't lose you twice… don't do this…"
She squeezed her eyes shut. She thought she could handle this, but she was wrong. No matter what Wonder Woman had told her and made her remember, she still loved Dick Grayson.
Opening her eyes, she tried to harden herself. She had once dreamed of a beautiful life with the man in front of her, but that dream was long since dead.
"It started with the Ogawa case," she began. "Bruce worked on it with me."
He remembered that case. It was the second to last case she worked on before she disappeared. That was when he first had gotten wind that Ted Kord had some sort of twisted crush on Barbara. He remembered pushing her chair so it wheeled far away from the keyboard. He quickly made the Oracle interface tell Ted Kord that it came as a complete surprise that he had detached himself from Wonder Woman's tit long enough to say something witty. Barbara had swatted him soundly for it.
"Bruce and I had been spending a great deal of time together," Barbara continued. "We spent so much time together, that Bruce began to notice something different about me," her voice began faltering, "I tried to avoid him until I could figure something out, but he was relentless… and then the threats came." She paused to bite her bottom lip briefly. "He confronted me about the pregnancy before you returned from your trip to New York. He told me living a normal life wasn't an option. He reminded me he had warned me when I so stubbornly insisted on being Batgirl there was no turning back. My options were abortion or adoption. If I kept the child, he would only be subjected to the same fate. There was no other way. I didn't think he could be so cruel, but…" her eyes hardened, "I need to get Terry out of here."
"I knew it."
She turned in surprise at his harsh admission.
"You told me it was a crush that ended," he rasped.
She looked at him in disbelief.
"I've felt empty without you all these years. It's finally revealed that you've been alive this whole time. I should have known it was too good to be true," he continued.
"Dick, what are you talking about? Aren't you listening to me?"
His eyes blazed. "Listening! I heard loud and clear how Bruce knocked you up and then tried to cover it up!"
The two soon began screaming at each other, not really hearing what the other was saying. Dick finally became so frustrated, he stormed off.
She threw here hands up in the air. "I'm glad to see we're picking up right where we left off…" She pulled out her cell phone and dialed the latest number she had programmed into it. "Can you grant me immunity?" she asked of the person on the other end of the line.
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Terry had shrugged on his jacket and was heading down the front walk to his bike. He had finally decided he needed to get home or he was going to go crazy sitting on the couch with his thoughts.
He was surprised to see Dick Grayson stomping towards the walk from the gardens. Every movement Dick made alerted Terry that he was terribly vexed. It didn't take a detective, or a Batman, to guess that it had to do with his mother. After a quick pause to rethink what he was about to do, Terry jogged over to Dick.
"Hey… How's, uh, it going?" He was trying not to sound lame, but it wasn't working. He was beginning to wonder what his original point was of going over to Dick in the first place.
Dick turned abruptly. He was surprised to see Terry there. He had been so blindingly filled with rage and purpose that he failed to notice his surroundings. That only made him more angry, but he swallowed it as best he could in the face of the young man before him. Terry was innocent in all this. There was no need to take it out on him.
From their first meeting, he had felt a connection to him, something tugging at his heart towards this stranger. Now he was beginning to realize exactly why. This boy was a part of Babs. He loved her, so naturally he would feel something towards his son.
'Her son…' the thought fueled his anger all over again. He cleared his throat and swallowed the giant lump forming there. Unknotting his brow from the seething frown, he tried his best to be at least civil to the innocent young man.
"Hey, Terry. I… I have to see Bruce about something."
Terry shifted uncomfortably. He could sense the awkward tension between them both and he wasn't quite sure why it was there. He wanted to know what was wrong with Dick. He wanted to know what was going on.
Most of all, he wanted to continue connecting with the man he so desperately wanted to be his biological father. Warren had been so wonderful to him, but in hindsight, he saw how flawed the McGuiness family really was.
"I have to go home, now."
Dick nodded and turned to walk back towards the door. Terry turned and began walking again towards his bike. He hadn't gone many steps when he felt someone gently take his arm. He looked up to see a sorrowful, concerned, troubled expression on Dick's face.
"Be careful, ok?" A softness took over his eyes and he released Terry's arm so he could reach up and ruffle his hair. "You're a good kid, you know that? I wasn't quite sure what the old man was doing when he took you in to where the suit, but I… I see now. You'll go far. Stay focused. Don't let your emotions get in the way… like I do," Dick paused and a few small lines appeared on his brow, as if he were trying to sum up in a few short words very intricate, important advice to give the young man before him. He gave up with a short puff of air and gave Terry a small pat on the back. "I… you know… it's too bad… I wish you were my kid. We would've made a good team: you, you're mother and I…" His face twisted and he quickly went back to stalking into the house, slamming the great front door.
Deciding to abandon his trip home, Terry felt a few moments of eavesdropping would help him patch together a story that was, thus far, not adding up at all.
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Tim was shocked by the file Bruce showed him.
"But… but it makes no sense," he began as he continued staring at the words displaying on the screen. "What's the motive?"
Bruce grimaced. "That might prove to be the real mystery."
Shaking his head, Tim let out a sarcastic laugh. "I thought I was going to be coming home to something so straight forward and that I was going to make sense of everything. Now… I don't know what to make of anything anymore."
They silently walked up the cave stairs and into the main living room. Bruce still needed more answers to the daunting evidence he had already uncovered on the mystery surrounding Barbara's disappearance. First, he needed to make sure his sons were okay. Settling in an old armchair, he began a long, much overdue conversation.
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Bruce and Tim had been enjoying a very nice conversation. Tim began to feel better…
They stood and headed towards the kitchen to make hot chocolate – a tradition that started when they found themselves in those father and son moments on nights long ago. They were nights when they tried to make sense of it all.
They hadn't gotten very far when the whirlwind that was Dick and his infuriating anger stormed into the manor. The slamming of the door alone – that mammoth, heavy door that was hard to slam – alerted them to his mood long before he entered the room, his face black as thunder.
"Y-you!" he sputtered, pointing an accusing finger at Bruce. "How COULD you! You're supposed to be my father, damn it! What is wrong with you!" He paused then and seemed to be gasping to catch his breath. "The-the minute my back is turned, you jump into bed with the woman I love more than my own life! And then you don't even learn from your mistakes with Tim and I! You just go right ahead and throw your only biological son into the batsuit the first chance you get."
Tim, who had been standing somewhere between Bruce and Dick, opted to silently sidestep out of the line of fire. He had learned a long, hard lesson many years ago about trying to referee between those two when they went at it.
There wasn't much to cause Bruce to be taken aback, but Dick's accusation, and the force of his anger, came as a shock. Dick had always been emotional. There had been many times when he had been angry. But this was different. He had never seen him this enraged…
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Terry, who had gone undetected in the emotional intensity, sank back against the kitchen wall. For several moments, nothing happened. Time seemed to stop. Nothing moved. Even his mind seemed to stop. Suddenly, his body went into an automatic mode as his mind slowly began calculating again. He was vaguely aware that he was heading back outside, but mostly he was aware of what he had just heard.