A/N: Thanks again to Tzaryn for more of her help, and to everyone who reviewed. It might be getting a little weird soon, just to warn you.
Disclaimer: Not mine, Star Wars is. George Lucas' also, Yoda-talk is. Not mine either, Barbies are. Patricia Wrede's, sour cream and onion ice cream is. Also someone else's, Wolfman is.
"Cake we must have. But cake Wookies do not eat. Dilemma, this is," Yoda complained. Everyone else ignored him, caught up in their own preparations.
It seemed the more reunited the dead Jedi and their random living friends got, the more confused Leia got. Her father and Obi-Wan were bickering over proper attire, while Qui-Gon tried to sort it out. Of course, since he hadn't seen any of them in years, this particular dead Jedi was no help whatsoever.
Mace Windu, Lando and Han were complaining about Leia getting married to someone that wasn't them. In fact, it had been Windu who had convinced Leia to marry Chewbacca, when she realized that the only other choice was him.
Luke and Jar Jar were in the kitchens, trying to cook. Leia hoped someone would shoo them both out before they finished something and expected people to eat it. Padmé was contemplating doing just that, but first she had to find the recipe she was looking for.
The other Jedi were all sitting around joining Anakin and Obi-Wan's argument or Windu, Lando and Han's complaining session, or having arguments and complaining sessions of their own. Except for Kit Fisto who was alternating between helping Leia calm down and sitting there with an amused look on her face.
"Would you all just go away?" snapped Leia loudly. There was a long pause as everyone tried to digest that request, and then Obi-Wan said calmly "no," and everyone nodded and went back to what they were doing, ignoring Leia's cry of frustration.
"They're always like that," explained Kit. She rolled her eyes. "Come on; let's go kick your brother and that stupid Gungun out of the kitchen so your mom can look for her recipes in there."
Leia smiled gratefully at the older (and deader) woman and followed her towards the kitchens.
Several hours later, Padmé had found her recipes and enlisted Leia and Kit to help her cook, while Luke and Jar Jar sat around and sulked at their lack of helpfulness. Anakin came by and told Padmé to let the pair cook, but she ignored him, and considering the dishes they had been distorting for Leia's wedding, it was no wonder.
Luke and Jar Jar had made and burned: double apple brownies (ordinary chocolate brownies with apples inside and applesauce on top) pasta/pizza (pizza with cheese sauce instead of regular sauce, and noodles stuck on top) sour cream and onion ice cream (do you really want to know how they did that?) fruit and vegetable sauce (applesauce with crushed cherries, oranges, tomatoes, onions, carrots, green beans and all other fruits and veggies they could find) and for a cake, they had begun baking their own little concoction. Cake mix and ice cream ground together, glued in place with suspiciously sticky applesauce (do I sense a theme?) and given form by pizza dough. The whole thing had been 'iced' with real ice, and was now melting all over the kitchen floor.
Unfortunately, Luke and Jar Jar had used up all of several foods, so different Jedi had to be sent to the grocery store for each one, Kit having stated that they would probably forget what they were supposed to buy if it was more than one item.
Anakin was sent to pick up four boxes of cake mix. Obi-Wan was getting all of the applesauce in the store, Leia liking it as much as her brother. Qui-Gon, one of the more intelligent Jedi, was told to get as much ice cream as he thought they would need, although Kit whispered the number to him on his way out of the kitchen. Yoda got stuck with buying salad items, since he would have just eaten anything else on the way home. In fact, Ani had to go back for the cake mix twice before he learned to avoid the small Jedi. And Mace Windu had to go to a different store to buy decorations, which began the rumor circulating that he was getting married.
Finally, the food was ready, and Padmé, Leia and Kit took the Padawans out shopping for things to wear. When they returned, they discovered that nobody else had done the same, so Padmé left it up to Leia, Kit and the younglings to set up while she took the others out on her favorite errand.
"No, put that down," Kit shouted in alarm as a Padawan Force-lifted the alter, just to show he could. The little boy dropped it and began to cry, earning the Jedi evil looks from the older Padawans.
Leia sighed and calmed the younglings down, while Kit busily arranged some flowers, trying to look innocent. Leia gave her a look and muttered about idiotic Jedi under her breath, but everything was as close to back to normal as possible.
Finally, everything was ready. Padmé and the others still weren't back, but at least it was all good on their side, Leia reflected. She had barely finished thinking this when a Padawan ran up.
"Princess Leia, what about the cake?" asked the boy.
"What about the cake?" Leia retorted. Luckily, the boy was old enough not to really mind her snappishness.
"Where is the bride and groom Thingymawhatsits on top?" he answered. Leia followed him into the kitchen, and sure enough, the bride and groom Thingymawhatsits were missing. Leia groaned. "Now what are we going to do? We'll never get a Wookie Thingymawhatsit in time."
And so she sat there moaning and groaning with nobody to comfort her, because her husband was out buying a tuxedo, and her mother was helping him, and her friend Kit was still arranging flowers and trying to look innocent.
And as for the Padawan boy who had pointed this out to her, well, he and the other Padawans were busy doing what Padawans to best: looking at each others toys. But in this case, they were doing it with a good cause.
"Does this work for the Princess?" asked a girl. The boy who had pointed it out to Leia, and was their leader this time, shook his head. "The dress is alright, but the hair is all wrong," he said. "Since when do they make bald Barbies anyway?"
The girl squirmed. "I sorta ripped off her hair to make my Master think she was growing a mustache. It was funny, but now the Barbie is missing her hair."
That would have been completely out of the running, but two other girls whipped out their own Barbies and swiftly began cutting off the long brown hair, gluing it to the other girl's Barbie, braiding it, and twining it around non-existent ears. (The boy didn't even want to know where those had gone.) "Tada!" exclaimed the girls, holding up the finished doll, which did look quite a bit like Leia.
"Good," their leader nodded. "Now, we just need Chewbacca."
"That shouldn't be too hard, anyone got a Wolfman action figure?" a boy asked.
"In a tux?" another retorted.
But someone did have a Wolfman, and boy who had a Wedding Ken figure was willing to donate the clothes. It didn't take the two girls who had gotten Leia's hair much longer to fit a tuxedo for her new husband. A third boy even got a nose off of his doggy figure and glued it onto Chewbacca's face, which everyone admitted, now looked more Wookie than Wolfman.
And so they did have Thingymawhatsits for the cake, although Leia was now taller than Chewbacca. But everyone said that was a metaphor. After all, she did talk more, and if voices were inches, we'd all be giants. But especially Leia.
Suddenly, Obi-Wan rushed back from the store. "Padmé just thought of something, and she sent me to ask you."
There was a long pause, and Leia snapped, "Well, what is it?"
Obi-Wan blinked. "What is what?"
"What you were going to tell me. What is it?"
"Ummm…."
Qui-Gon raced up. "Obi-Wan was going to ask if we had a flower girl, ring bearer, best man, maids of honor, flowers, rings, and special clothes. She wants to know who's what so she knows what to buy for whom."
Leia sighed. "It always has to be last-minute, doesn't it?"
"Well," put in Obi-Wan, who had caught his breath. "You did only get engaged like, yesterday evening."
Leia glared at him, but before she could reply, Kit walked up. "Hey guys," she said. "Which flower arrangement do you like best?" As she held up the bouquet, Qui-Gon sneezed.