A/N see bottom note

Padawan #1, Tim, grinned loudly. Please don't ask how he did that, he just did.

"Will you be quiet?" demanded Padawan #2, Joe, grumpily.

"What, don't you like your new name?" teased Tim.

"I don't like having to decide each line," retorted Joe.

"Ahh, yes, the curse of the named. Being able to say something apart from 'yeah'," joked Padawan #3, Joanne.

"Shut it, Jo," snapped Padawan #5, Peter, grumpily.

"Joe didn't say anything, Pada- Peter," said Padawan #4, Leslie, fairly.

"Wow, I thought I was the overly fair one," commented Jo.

"I wasn't talking to Joe," answered Peter. "I was talking to Joanne."

"Why do you both have to be named Joe?" asked Ronald, formerly Innocent Bystander #27.

"Because we wanted to," said Jo and Joe at the same time.

"They're just kids," said Patricia fondly, smiling at them.

The Padawans grinned grumpily back at the former Innocent Bystander #38.

"We're here!" announced Mace Windu, formerly Mace Windu.

"Good," said Anakin Skywalker, formerly Anakin Skywalker. "I'm starving."

"Boosa to yousa," exclaimed another voice.

"Jar Jar!" shouted everyone exasperatedly.

"What?" he demanded. "Mesa here to tellin' yousa that the wedding thingy's movin' to da beach!"

"Da BEACH!" shouted everyone, running inside the Jedi Temple to pack their swimsuits and towels.

A few hours later, the former Padawans #1-5, Innocent Bystanders #19-45, and the real characters had arrived at the beach. Apparently, the wedding preparations had been set up without the knowledge of the formerly mentioned people whose story we were just telling/writing/listening to/reading.

An alter like thing had been placed by the water, with a priestess (Innocent Bystander #18, who had just missed going, but was now called Tiffany) standing behind it. The idea, Tiffany explained, was that the alter was placed next to the beach, but so that the beach was to their right, and the people watching were staring at them from an angle, any pictures getting the bride and groom over a background of water, that Anakin said must have been to make Gol-Smé look a little less hideous. Padmé slapped him.

Since the guests were on the left of the alter instead of in front of it, walking down the aisle would mean going as completely in another direction as one of Anakin's shortcuts. So, there was no aisle. Instead all of the chairs were packed together in a way that Tiffany explained meant the unity of the two families, instead of them sitting on opposite sides of the aisle, but really seemed to represent the chaos of the two 'families'.

Most of the wedding was ignored by the guest, who were still trying to find their seats, move them to a new location so they could see, then change the whole order around again so that they could sit by their friends. Naturally, Tiffany good-naturedly ignored all of this, so as a result, nobody paid attention until Gol-Smé started dancing around in circles having just obtained the ring.

"You may kiss the bride," said Tiffany, a bit dizzily from watching the creature dance around in circles. Everyone was so shocked when Gol-Smé kissed the ring instead of the innocent bystander (Girl #8, now called Bobette,) that they didn't even notice Tiffany fall over until she began screaming "Help, I'm drowning! Help! Help! I can't swim! Help, I'm drowning!"

All of the Jedi automatically jumped to her rescue, only to find that since the water was to the right, and she had fallen backwards, she was lying in the sand with her arms and legs flailing about, screaming her head off. Not literally, of course. That would just be gross.

Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon disgustedly reached down and grabbed one arm each, pulling Tiffany out of the sand. One of the non-humanoid Jedi who had been rejected before Leia's wedding gasped and pointed at the imprint.

"It's an angel!" shouted Anakin stupidly. Sadly, it took exactly three minutes of running around screaming before anyone realized that it wasn't.

"It's a sand angel," explained Qui-Gon. "You know how in winter, you make snow angels? Well, this is its summer equivalent."

"So we can make sand angels just by doing what Tiffany did?" asked Joe.

"Yep," said Qui-Gon, pleased to have figured it out.

"Cool!" shouted Tim, falling backwards and screaming that he was drowning. Everyone else stared at him for a moment, but when they helped him up, there was an imprint just like Tiffany's

Quickly, every Jedi, Padawan, Innocent Bystander, or miscellaneous person began to do exactly what Tim and Tiffany had done. Sadly, nobody had the intelligence to cut the screaming, so it was with lots of background noise the Qui-Gon approached the non-humanoid Jedi who had spoken earlier.

"Thanks for pointing that out," said Qui-Gon. "It caused a lot of noise, but it kept them occupied for a while."

"Oh, it wasn't the sand angel I was pointing out," said the other Jedi, who went by the name of Jango Fett (just a coincidence.) "I was pointing out a terrifying atrocity."

"Oh. What terrifying atrocity would that be?"

"This!" exclaimed Jango dramatically, pointing in the general direction of a crumpled up towel lying on the beach.

"Huh?" asked Qui-Gon. "I don't see anything."

"Can you not see this horrible thing?" demanded Jango. "Can you not see this towel that has been so horribly mistreated?"

"A towel?" asked Qui-Gon with barely disguised disbelief.

"Yes. Can you imagine what terrible person would have committed an act of violence such as this?"

"What, crumpled up their towel?" asked Obi-Wan, coming up behind his master, having finished with his sand angel.

"Yes! This sort of thing is, sadly, all too common."

"Is that a problem?" asked Obi-Wan, who was looking more and more confused.

"Of course it is! Imagine if you were a towel. How would you feel about being treated this way?"

"I wouldn't," replied Obi-Wan. "Towels are inanimate objects. They don't feel."

"Sadly, that is what all too many people believe these days."

"You mean people didn't always believe that?" asked Obi-Wan.

"Once upon a time, many more people followed the belief of sentient towels. And that made our job much easier."

"How can people believing that towels are sentient make protecting the galaxy easier?" asked Anakin, finishing his own sand angel and coming up behind the other two Jedi.

"Protecting the galaxy?" asked Jango blankly. "Why would we want to do a thing like that?"

"Because you're all Jedi," said Qui-Gon, gesturing at the other non-humanoid Jedi gathered behind Jango.

"Not at all, my dear fellow," said Jango laughingly. "We are PETT!"

"You're what?"

"People for the Ethical Treatment of Towels," explained Jango. "PETT."

"Oh, do you have a pet?" asked Jo, coming up on them. "Can I play with it?"

"No, no, my dear girl," laughed Jango. "People for the Ethical Treatment of Towels."

"Wow," commented Jo. "There's an organization for everything these days."

"So what exactly do you want to accomplish with your umm, 'People for the Ethical Treatment of Towels' thing?" asked Padmé in confusion.

"We want to gain towels the rights that are so tragically forgotten," explained one of Jango's friends.

"Which are what?" laughed Anakin.

"The rights to not be used by you," retorted Leia.

"Why?" asked Jango.

"He sweats like a pig," explained Obi-Wan.

"Oh," said the non-humanoid Jedi. "Well, that's not what we were talking about."

"What were you talking about?" asked Qui-Gon with phony interest.

"The rights to reach their full potential," said Jango cryptically.

"Which is?" asked Anakin.

"Their potential to take over the world!" pronounced Jango dramatically.

"Uhh, right," said Anakin.

Jango turned to Kit Fisto, who was leaving disgustedly.

"You look familiar," she said. "Do you know my friend, Leia Amidala Skywalker?"

"I think we're related," said Jango dismissively. Realizing that this person would be of no help, he turned to another.

"You, my lady," he said to another woman. "Would you sign a pledge to give your consent to be controlled by towels?"

Padmé gave him a look of disgust. "Shut up," she said.

THE END

Real A/N: a whole bunch of thanks to Tzaryn, for helping me with the ending, and coming up with the beach wedding, and PETT. I know I didn't use all your ideas, but I just couldn't fit Harry Potter in with the plot.

Hope all of you liked the story. If you know Spaceballs, you might want to read The Revenge of the Dink Dinks, but I'll shut up about the other stories I've written for now. Thank you very, very much to all of you who reviewed, you encouragement makes me happy. I love all of you in the vaguest sense of the term.

Thank you happy and nice readers and reviewers. And sad and mean readers and reviewers, just because I'm in a good mood and will probably proceed to read something sad so that I don't bounce off walls. Goodbye for now,

Me.