MK25:Welcome back, and
prepare for another weird prank call, starring Kouichi!
Grady:What's in store for
us this time?
MK25:Well, (MK whispers
something in Grady's ear)
Grady:Are you serious! I
can't believe you're dragging in-
MK25:SHUT UP!
Grady:Well, the disclaimer
for this chapter says..
Disclaimer:Digimon, crank yankers, fox news, and ebaumsworld are not mine.
Grady:...that!
MK25:now, on to the
laughs.
Chapter 2:"How do you like the smell?"
Kouichi was getting ready
for his turn of prank calling. By this, I mean he was going to
and finding a soundboard, but he also demanded that
everyone lefted the room.
Kouichi dialed a number
that he found in the phone book and it started to ring.
A man that sounded like he
was in his late thirties answered. "Hello? Fox news" the
man said.
Kouichi, with near inhuman
speed, clicked one of the phrases on the soundboard "Hello?"
"Hi." The man
replied.
Kouichi, again, with
lightning speed clicked a phrase "How do you like the smell, is
it good
"What?"
"Does it smell good
enough for you in there?"
"Yeah, it smells fine
in here. Who do you want?"
"Jack the ripper."
"He doesn't work
here, jackass. who is this?"
"Michael Jackson"
(with the others)
they barely could make out what Kouichi was saying and braced themselves for laughing. They could barely make out "Machael Jackson" and nearly fell off the stairs, which was very close by.
(Back to Kouichi)
The man started right
where we left of after being speechless for a few seconds. "Right,
Michael Jackson. And I'm the Pope""It's Michael
Jackson."
"Whatever, Michael.
What are you calling about?"
"I see the face of
god! I see god!"
"Alright, Bitch. Why
are you calling here?"
"I can't believe
you've never heard of me! I'm a very popular enterainer. When I was
your age I had 6 gold records!"
"Yeah, I'm sure you
did, idiot. So, should I just hang up on you, or get to the end of
this phone call?"
"Well, how about
this?" The soundboard then started to sing the chorus to the
song "Billy Jean".
"Why the hell are you
calling us, we're just a news channel, and this is the assignment
desk. So, who do you want?"
"Can I stay with you
tonight?"
"The hell...hell no!"
"What's wrong with
sharing your bed? I can't sleep at night."
"There are very many
reasons why. One, I don't know you. Two, you're a child molester.
Shall I continue?"
"That I'm not! It's
people with a dirty mind that think that."
"Oh. Well then, what
do you call it?"
"My mind doesn't work
that way. Just because it's in print dosen't mean it's gossip. I'm
not going to do anything sexual to a child."
"Whatever! your a
child raper and you know it. I'll never let your ass in my house."
"I, um...hmmmm."
"See, my frickin'
point exactly, you dirty motherfucking pedophile."
"A pedophile? That
I'm not! you'd be amazed how often I hear that. No, that's wrong!"
"Well, so is sleeping
with children,sicko! why do you sleep with them?"
"When I see children,
I see the clean sex. That's why I love them so much. I am going to do
anything sexual to a child, In a pure, loving, fun way. Give 'em hot
milk, cookies, handcuffs, elephants and giraffes and crocodiles and
tigers and lions, Peter pan, bumper-to-bumper, I could do something
like that."
"Yeah, you filthy
pedophile. go call a day-care center or something rather than us.
Shit!"
"No, I'm afraid not."
"Well, what's the
reason raping was found at your little neverland rape house?"
"I'm not aloud to
talk about it."
"That's all to
typical of an excuse."
"My children sleep
with other people all the time. That's how we were raised!"
"Well, you ain't
sleeping with my kids, so fuck off."
"One time, I asked to
use the restroom, and it stuck so bad! there was doo-doo and feces
thrown all over the walls. I was outraged!"
"Listen, I'll make it
real simple. keep calling me, and I'll call the cops. Come down here,
I'll rip your boys off if you have any left and shove them down your
throat, hows that?"
"I would never hurt a
child. I've helped, many, many, many children, thousands of kids,
Sick children, busloads of kids!"
"Oh, so having sex
with little kids is what you call 'helping them'?"
"For sex! they enjoy
it. that's what I see. I would slit my wrist first, I love them so
much!"
"Your an idiot. quit
calling me, jackass."
The man on the other line hung up and Kouichi hung up shortly after and everyone came back in. when everyone was in, everyone started to laugh till they cried.
"Kouichi," Zoe
started, still chuckling. "I can't believe you went there."
"I know, Zoe!"
Tommy said. "I may not have understood it all, but it still was
funny."
Koji managed to regain
himself enough to say "Don't ever tell anyone about the stuff
we did today, okay Tommy?"
"You bet!"
Then, Zoe, J.P., Takuya
shot a glance at each other and then the phone. They all made a mad
dive for it and Zoe ended up victorious. "Yay! My turn!"
Grady:And so ends this
chapter. MK, I can not believe that you brought Micheal Jackson into
this.
MK25:I know that there are
Micheal Jackson fans out there-
Grady:and you know who you
are.
MK25:But, this was just a
joke. and I know you people can take a joke if-
Grady:Don't say it! just
listen to the music and shut up.
MK25:Yay! FF6 battle!
Grady:For those who don't
speak gamer, he said "Final fantasy 3 battle music" and we
will get back with another chapter soon, I hope.
MK25:'Cause school starts in 3 or 4 days!
