Author's Note: On and on and on we go. When will this tale end? Heck, I don't know. I do know that I own no places or people featured in it. Those all belong to Tim Burton, Danny Elfman, Henry Selick, and Disney/Touchstone or Jhonen Vasquez, Kevin Manthei, Steve Ressel, and Nickelodeon/Viacom. I'm a fangirl. I own myself. At least, I hope I do.
"How much meat does this guy eat?" Barrel asked Lock and Shock, opening Zim's refrigerator to find steaks just lying inside.
"Tell me about it," Lock said. "There's meat in the cabinets and under the sink too."
"Don't forget the toast," Shock said, pointing to a toaster that was currently sticking out of one wall and shooting toast slices across the kitchen.
"Oh, Zim doesn't eat any of that," said the voice of the Base's computer.
"What do you do, follow us around the house?" Lock asked the ceiling.
"I am the house."
"So you're a ghost?" Barrel asked.
"No. Just wires," said the voice, now coming from a monitor that floated from the ceiling.
"Well, what is there to eat?" Shock asked the screen.
"I dunno. GIR likes the Acne Blast cream. Oh, and he orders from Bloaty's all the time too."
"Bloaty's?" Lock, Shock, and Barrel asked.
"It's a filthy pizza place. I'll dial them up, GIR has a tab there anyway."
"Why are you being nice to us? What's the catch?" Lock asked.
"No catch, none at all."
"Good," Shock said. "Let us know when it comes."
"Where are all of you going?" the computer asked.
"To see if there are any other animals we can launch into space," Barrel said.
"Don't forget," Shock said to the computer as the three scampered off, back into the depths of the Base.
"Finally," the computer said to itself, its monitor changing from the red Irken insignia it usually had during broadcast to something that strangely resembled a profile of Zim.
Meanwhile…"It goes to the left of the screen, you dolt!" the screen carrying Doctor Finkelstein's personality yelled at Zim.
"You are the dolt! A gasquiggasplorch could program this better than you!" Zim yelled back at the screen.
"What's a gasquiggasplorch?" Oogie Boogie asked offhandedly.
"Your mamma!" GIR exclaimed, breaking into a fit of giggles and banging on the sides of Doctor Finkelstein's inactive head.
"I didn't ask you, trash can," Oogie Boogie said to GIR.
"A gassquiggasplorch is a dull-witted beast from my home planet, but not as dull-witted as this excuse for a scientist," Zim said, pointing to Doctor Finkelstein's screen.
"Fine, put that button there and blow yourself to smithereens. You'll be doing everyone a favor," Doctor Finkelstein said.
"Geezer's got a point, Zim," Oogie Boogie said.
"Quiet, Oogie!" Zim exclaimed before he felt a transmission coming in from his PAK.
Zim allowed a metallic rod to slither its way out from his PAK. It projected a holographic screen of his "living room" on Earth. There was no one there. That of course meant that the computer itself was making the transmission. But why?
"Computer? What is the meaning of this?" Zim asked in an arrogant tone.
"Zim?" the computer's voice asked.
"Almighty Invader ZIM."
"Good. Because I got Skoodge by mistake a few seconds ago and he sounded like he was in a lot of pain."
"Get to the point, Computer."
"Yeah, uh, there are these three kids running amok in the Base."
"WHAT?"
"They won't leave. Minimoose ran off and I'm stuck cleaning up all the mess. It's really annoying. They break a wall or blow something up every hour."
"Computer! Don't just slack off, kill them!"
"They can't be killed," Oogie Boogie said proudly. "I know exactly who you're talking about."
"Who is it?" GIR asked.
"They're-"
"Who?" GIR asked, interrupting Oogie Boogie.
"They are-" Oogie Boogie said, clearly irritated.
"I wanna know!"
"SHUT UP!" Zim yelled at both of them.
"Finally, that big mouth of yours is useful," Doctor Finkelstein said.
"You are one step from being unplugged, Otherworldly Stink Monkey," Zim said to the screen.
"As I was saying, they're Lock, Shock, and Barrel. You can't kill them, they're already dead," Oogie Boogie said.
"Oh. They touched your antibacterial meat," the computer told Zim.
"They tainted the meat? Great! Now when I do go back I'll be germ-filled. Disinfect the Base, Computer. And if you can't kill them, then maim them or fuse them to the weasels."
"Oh no you don't. You leave them alone. They work for me. I'll gladly have them back here once we get Zim and his trash can here home," Oogie Boogie said to the hologram.
"Ok. Besides, they used up all the weasels," the computer said.
"That's it! I am rewiring you when I return! Good-bye, Computer!" Zim said, forcing the mechanical leg to snake back into his PAK.
"Awwww, I wanted to say hi to Pig," GIR said, slightly tearing up.
"You can say hi to Pig when we go back to Earth," Zim said to GIR before turning to Doctor Finkelstein's screen. "Hurry with the device!"
"Gladly," Doctor Finkelstein said to Zim as he began directing him on where to place certain buttons.
Oogie didn't have anything to add. So his henchchildren were slowly but surely ruining everything Zim owned? Ha. He taught them well. For a moment, he wondered if Zim could stay a bit longer, just so Lock, Shock, and Barrel could completely wreck his belongings by the time he and GIR went back. Then, Oogie glanced over to GIR, who was having way too much fun riding around in Doctor Finkelstein's empty head. No. These lunatics had to go before they drove Oogie crazy too. Besides, they could have a grand time driving Jack insane once Oogie made sure they were all stuck there. All he wanted in the first place was to lure Jack into another world and entrap him there. Somehow, this little detour would turn out just as well.
Meanwhile…"What took you so long?" Gaz asked Dib as he, Jack, and Sally entered the house.
"Hello to you too," Dib said to his sister in a sarcastic tone.
"Shut up and make the popcorn," Gaz said to Dib, who made his way into he kitchen with the box of popcorn. "You too, Bone-" Gaz started before opening her right eye in wariness. "Who's she?"
"Oh, this is Sally," Jack said to Gaz, Sally waving shyly before putting her hand down.
"Good, another servant. You can get me a soda, this one ran out," Gaz said.
"Gaz, you drank the last soda," Dib's voice said from the kitchen.
"I did, didn't I? Dib, go and buy a bottle of soda."
"But we just got home."
"You said you'd do anything, Dib. Remember?"
"Sally and I will go," Jack said.
"What?" Sally asked.
"Alright. Be back in less than ten minutes or I'll have a ghost trap waiting for you."
"Got it," Jack said to Gaz before dragging Sally out of the house.
"She's horrible," Sally said to Jack as they walked back towards the place they had just left. "That poor boy."
"I know," Jack said.
"Poor you, having to deal with her for a day."
"She beat me up with a baseball bat. Well, it was my fault for sleeping on the couch without notifying her, but it still hurt."
"That's no excuse. It's good Lock, Shock, and Barrel haven't met her or else there'd be a Terrible Quartet."
"I doubt it. She'd probably have them doing her chores too," Jack said.
"Probably," Sally said.
"Sally?"
"Yes?"
"About before… sorry if I scared you. I don't have it all under control yet. I didn't mean to."
"You didn't scare me, Jack. What are you talking about?"
"You had your arm around me like this," Jack said, left arm reaching around Sally and landing on her left shoulder. "And then you kind of jumped back," Jack said, demonstrating that as well.
"Oh, I wasn't scared, just realizing my boundaries," Sally said.
"Boundaries?"
"You're the Pumpkin King. People can't act touchy-feely with you, it's disrespectful."
"But you're not just any person, you're my best friend."
"Jack, we have soda to pick up."
"There you go, changing the subject. You do that a lot too."
"Jack, just drop it!" Sally exclaimed, gasping slightly after she had done so. "I'm sorry. I don't know where that came from."
"It's alright. You're new here, still getting used to things. I'm not helping by nagging you. I'm sorry too," Jack said as he reached around Sally again.
"Is that the place?" Sally asked, pointing to a convenience store just ahead.
"Looks like it. Hold on, I'll be right back."
Before Sally could ask Jack what he was doing, he entered the store. In a few minutes, he returned with about four bottles of assorted sodas. He handed two to Sally and made their way to Dib's house once again. Only, when they got there, there was another person waiting for them. Well, not exactly a person.
"Guys! Glad you're back, listen, I think I know where the kids you're looking for are," Dib said to Jack and Sally when they entered the house.
"Wait! Drop the soda here first," Gaz said, smiling slightly at the four bottles of soda Jack and Sally gave her. "Not bad."
"Quick, to my room," Dib said as he walked ahead of Jack and Sally.
"Where are they Dib?" Jack asked.
"Zim's Base, they have to be, or else he wouldn't have shown up here," Dib said, opening the door to his room and pointing to a small purple moose hovering over his bed.
Minimoose squeaked in a frightened tone upon seeing Jack and Sally. He even glided under Dib's blanket to hide.
"We won't hurt you," Sally said.
Minimoose squeaked again, peeking a little from beneath the blanket.
"Here, this will help us understand him," Dib said, taking out his laptop and entering a translation program. He then attached a cable to the laptop and put the other end in Minimoose's mouth "Ok, Minimoose, squeak away."
"Yeah right, your futile human technology will never- whoa!" Minimoose's "voice" said from the laptop.
"Alright, Minimoose, why are you here?"
"Listen, Big Head Dib, this doesn't change a thing between us. I still serve Zim, got it?"
"Fine, just tell us why you're here."
"There are these three bad kids in the Base. Really bad kids. They're breaking stuff and now they want to beat me up."
"That sounds like them all right," Jack said. "So that means it was them in the machine. They are going to get it when I find them."
"Anyway, I'm probably safer here than anywhere else. But if you even think of dissecting me, I'll blow you up, Dib. I'll do it! I have the power in my nubs!"
"Enough of that," Dib said, taking the cable end out of Minimoose's mouth, causing the moose to squeak angrily.
"What do we do now?" Sally asked Dib and Jack.
"Sleep on it. We're definitely heading to Zim's Base tomorrow," Dib said. "Once we get those kids, you can all go home and bring Zim here to meet justice."
"I can't wait. I'm so excited, I doubt I'll sleep," Jack said.
"Someone fluff my cushion!" Gaz yelled from the living room.
"Well, goodnight, everyone," Jack said, fake yawning and about to lie down on Minimoose, who squeaked in his highest pitch yet.
"Oh no you don't," Dib said, grabbing Jack's hand and dragging him out of the room.
"This is Pumpkin King abuse!" Jack exclaimed.
Sally shook her head and giggled. She knew Jack was kidding, for he could have turned intangible the minute Dib grabbed him. She gathered her breath and followed the pair. Something told her that Gaz wouldn't be too enthusiastic about letting them rest for the big day tomorrow.
To Be Continued…