"Ruminations"
By Ana-Misa
"This is a happy moment. The happiest of my life."
I rejoice in his words and melt against the pressure of his lips on mine.
Five unendurable months of longing for his touch,
If only we could stay like this forever.
Alas, fate is fickle and one man's joy
Often precedes a woman's infinite sorrow.
"I'll save you, Padme. I promise you."
My love, always afraid of losing me,
As if I would ever leave him.
He cradles me in his arms.
I press my ear to his chest.
To hear his heart beat,
Like waves pounding along the lakeshore.
"He turned to the dark side."
I want to scream at Obi-Wan for saying such slanderous words,
But all I do is stare at the ships flitting across Coruscant's skyline.
Is my life, my love, a lie?
How could it come to this?
Even as he leaves,
Obi-Wan's pity envelops me.
Oh, my Anakin, why didn't you tell me?
"Liar!"
Unbearable pressure on my neck
Attempts to pull away fingers that aren't there, fruitless
Panic slowly overcomes me as I plead with my love.
Please, Anakin,
I'm sorry.
I love you.
My feeble words are caught in my throat in an endless mantra.
Fiery lava lights his face as a red haze gives way to darkness.
"Is Anakin all right?"
A croak escapes my mouth; my voice sounds strange to my ears
Obi-Wan's calloused hand grasps my shoulder.
Does he want to reassure me that Anakin is fine?
Where is my love?
A fluttering heart betrays me
And once again I sink into nothingness.
Cool, sterile lights greet me as pain shoots through my body.
Pressure increases before it fades away,
But the bursts of pain grow closer together.
Obi-Wan is once again at my side
With his kind and soothing words penetrating the tumult in my mind,
I clutch his hand and fight through my labor.
Another hard push and a burning sensation leaves me weak,
As a thin wail fills the operation room.
Obi-Wan cradles my son in his arms.
With a gentle brush of my fingers on his forehead,
I name Anakin's first born – Luke.
Joy gives way to more piercing pain,
Then her cries join her brother's wailing – Leia.
Oh, Ani, you should be at my side.
Tears mingle with perspiration on my face.
What comfort will my broken heart bring my little ones?
Soon I'll join the others, who lost their lives for our shattered dreams.
Perhaps one day, Luke and Leia, you'll learn the truth
And only one man I trust could deliver this gift to you.
"Obi-Wan, there is still good in him. I know this."
As I exhale my last breath,
He accepts my boon.
Sorrow for my lost love overwhelms me,
But a new hope lives in Obi-Wan's arms.