In Britain, Bush is portrayed as an idiot. Let us see what happens when he meets our resident Joey. For the purposes of the Fanfiction rules let us call him Mr President.

Why The President Should Never Go To Domino City

One day Mr President was cruising around in his limo, on the way to visit his favourite Texan restaurant…in Texas. He must've told the driver to go the wrong way because he ended up in the streets of Domino City.

Lost, and downcast, he stepped out of the limo and sat down on a bench, trying to decide what to do next. Then he met Joey.

Joey whistled as he strolled down the street, hands in his pockets. He felt lucky. The world was going to throw something at him, and he knew he could take it on and throw it right back! Yeah, dat's right, Joey thought, I'm feelin' lu-c-ky!

"Say kid, you wouldn't happen to know where Texas is, wudya?"

"Wha?" Joey jumped. "Holy Ra, you're da President!"

"Yes, indeed I am," Mr president said, after he turned around to see who Joey was talking to.

Joey's eyes narrowed. Maybe he could try something here…"You know, if ya wanna find out where Texas is, why don'tcha hire a hot air b'loon n' we can take to da skies!"

"Wow, that's a mighty fine idea!" Mr President's eyes lit up. If he had considered buying a map, none of the rest would've happened.

A while later, the two were riding up high in the sky. Both were feeling lucky- Joey had scammed a free ride, whilst the President had forgotten to bring his bodyguard and thought himself blessed no one had tried to assassinate him today.

"You know, is it true you own all this land?" Joey asked, as they gazed out across the desert.

"Yep," Mr president answered happily. "And the whole of Fairyland as well!"

"What? You can't like, own Fairyland!" Joey exclaimed.

"Yes I can, ever since I was a kid, all the fairies and dinosaurs told me I was their leader! I've always owned those shining gates…" his Texan accented voice trailed off as he slipped into his childhood memories. "And playing with the pixies, skipping in the grass…"

"Since when do you own Fairyland?"

"Since the day I owned this great country…state…states! No, I was right the first time-"

"That's neutral territory, that is. You're stupid!"

"Hey, I'm the President here, the most powerful man in the Yoo-Ess-Eye, no one calls me stupid!"

"I just did, stupid!" Joey flicked Mr President's nose. "Yeah, Mr I-choked-onna-pretzel!"

"Now let's not bring that up-"

"And whose mother is-"

"Listen, let's not talk about my mother."

"Why not?" She's your mother after all," Joey said sweetly.

"I know that, I'm not that stupid!"

The argument was getting pretty heated.

"Oh yeah, den prove it!"

"OK, ah will! What do you want me to do?" The President drawled, puffing out his chest.

"I bet all the Leprechaun's gold in Fairyland that you can't jump out…no, won't jump outta this balloon an' survive!"

"Oh yeah?" The President said. "But that's dangerous, that is. Ah could die."

"Even this peanut could fall faster than you!" Joey stared at the peanut sorrowfully, before he reached to drop it out. "Oh man, I can't do dat! It would be like killin' a parta me," he said sadly, and ate it.

"Ha! You ate the peanut, now you gotta jump!" The President jumped up and down happily.

"I will, and I will still fall faster than you, cause I'm Joey Wheeler!" Joey said with a hint of pride.

"Yeah, and I'm…I'm…" Mr President frowned, and concentrated.

"Mr. President?" Joey said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Yeah, that's it!"

Suddenly, without warning, the two jumped.

"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" Joey cried as he tumbled through the air.

As the ground rushed up to meet him, Joey realized that he was going to die. Then the wind blew him a few metres to the right, and he landed in a stack of hay. The President was more unfortunate; he landed in a steaming heap of manure.

"Oh man!" Joy cried, as the President emerged from the heap like a creature from the deep. "No fair! You should be dead! I should've won Fairyland!"

"Ha! It takes more than that to kill the President of the Yoo-Ess-Eye!"

"U-S-A, dufus," Joey muttered as a lone assassin reared up from a cactus and shot the President in the back with happy-darts. The assassin ran off, cackling like a madman as the President slumped forward, a happy smile on his face.

Joey could've sworn the assassin had a starfish shaped head as he disappeared into the horizon.

And the moral of the story is: Some people are just too stupid to die.

Or: Never put Joey Wheeler or the President within five miles of each other.

To all President lovers, he was just shot with tranquillisers, OK? Yugi just got fed up of hearing them argue!

This is based on a sketch that I did with a guy in Drama for English, although I had to change it a lot so it would fit, otherwise it would be way too political! And I made up the last bit! For a full account of what really happened in the sketch, just send me an email! So, what do you think?