And Komali burst into the cabin, eyes alight with avian fury, an image of winged righteousness. This effect was only slightly spoiled by the cooing sage clamped onto his arm, having a one-sided discussion on how many children they would have. He glowered at Tetra as though his feathers were about to combust with rage.

"What are you doing to my cuddlemuffins, you despicable sea-wench!" He howled, pointing at her accusationally.
"I'm going to gut him like a fish, and then I'm going to string his lifeless corpse from my mast, and..." The pirate's voice dropped to a mumble, her face still scarlet.
"I SHALL GIVE YOU WHAT FOR, DAUGHTER OF A DERANGED OCTOROK!"

And with that, the bird-prince lunged, tackling Tetra and trying to claw her eyes out. Medli squawked, startled, as she was launched into the air by the unexpected movement.

"WHAT THE NINE HELLS ARE YOU DOING, YOU STUPID CUCCO-BRAINED TWIT-" The pirate twisted, kicking up into the Rito's stomach. He made a rather interesting "glurk" noise. Medli stood up, horrified and slightly disoriented.

"I'LL SAVE YOU K'MLI-KINS!" She cried, launching herself into the fray.

Link, meanwhile, had slipped free of his bonds. Tip-toeing cautiously past the confused brawlers, who were now moving too quickly to distinguish one from another for more than a moment.
Slowly he pushed aside the curtain, while Tetra's voice howled a series of deadly insults against the parents, relations, and pets of anyone in a 10-foot radius.

He was greeted by a puzzled cluster of pirates, several of them sporting bird-like footprints on their faces.
For a moment they stared at him, and he at them, and...

Then Link ran for all he was worth, launching himself through the door, leaping off the side of the ship, and... finding himself in a blank stretch of ocean with menacing, turnip-like Seahats all around.

He screamed.
And screamed.
Inside Tetra's cabin, several bottles broke.
The fighters sat on the floor, blinking.
And Link continued screaming at the top of his lungs. Tetra cringed, plugging her ears with her fingers, and rushed out of her cabin.

And then Link gasped for air, inhaled seawater, choked... and slipped under the waves.

From the deck, Tetra watched, horrified, as he bobbed up and down like a cork wrapped in a windsock. Komali raced up, opening his mouth to speak, and shrieked in horror.

"LINKYPOOOO! NOOOOOO!"

The Rito prince leapt onto the railing of the boat and dove into the waves, surfacing and gasping like a fish out of water. Or in this case a bird out of air.


Miles and miles away, Makar was slowly advancing on a Boko Baba.

"...n-nice planty thing... pleeease don't eat me..." He whimpered, inching nearer... nearer... and stabbing it viciously with his violin bow.

The monster squealed like a photosynthetic mouse that had been trodden on and snapped at him. Makar shrieked and stumbled backward.

"I'm doomed..." He mumbled, jabbing at it again. This time the carnivorous, glorified daisy swallowed him.


A/N: Holy crapdoodles I haven't updated this in over a year. That took me way too long. I hope this chapter's good enough.