Disclaimer: Don't own it, never will
AN: Huh...Well, I'm feeling a little irritated from a review I got. I can understand if you guys are annoyed if I don't update often, but I DO have my reasons for not being able to update. It's not like I mean to torment you! –sighs- Well, that's all that I want to say. Since I have some free time and I'm not under undue stress due to the IB program and colleges and I haven't had any bomb threats from terrorists lately... Here's another chapter of Incidences of Madness.
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At midnight, when everyone was already asleep, Vegeta sneaks up to the roof of Capsule Corps where he finds his son staring out at the starless sky of West City, never moving from the spot since he had retreated hours before from Bulma's lab. The city lay out before them like a bed of stars, the huge field of lights nearly extending to the horizon. Truly massive, it over-awed the young saiyajin, whose face is cast in the dim light from below.
Without a word the elder prince kneels by him and tosses a small handkerchief wrapped package onto his lap. Blinking down at the package, Goku opens it and finds two large oniigiri sake and one oniigiri ume leftover from the dinner they had without him. "Thanks," Goku mumbles and begins to eat. Nothing more is said until he finishes and even a long time after that. When the words do some, they seem to struggle past Goku's lips, timid and unsure. "I – I don't know who I am anymore, Dad. This morning... I was just Prince Goku. Now I'm suddenly an insanely intelligent super genius father with psychic powers who used to be 50 years old or something and who may or may not even be your son."
"You are." Goku looks up at the prince with a start. "They're having a hard time accepting the fact that you're my son. They just received proof of it right after you left. Real proof. Gohan collapsed on the floor when he heard. He hasn't woken up since then," he adds with a scowl of disdain.
The younger saiyajin snorts and then expectedly bursts into fits, laughing at the idea of the bottle eyed dweeb fainting dead away. Vegeta glared at him in annoyance. "Oh you go ahead and laugh! But now I have him for a grandson! I'm too young to be a grandfather!" The declaration only makes the nearly-suffocating saiyajin choke on even more laughter. The prince just sulked.
"Oh Dad," Goku says in exasperation, when he finally had enough control of himself. "Don't worry about it. They're simply going to have to accept I'm not the Goku that they know anymore. I'm Prince Ximitar Goku."
"It's supposed to be Prince Vegeta Ximitar," Vegeta mutters, sitting down next to the boy. "There was never supposed to be a Prince Goku in the official name. Then on Bejito-sei, you would have simply been known as Prince Vegeta to the rest of the commoners. Now... it's a bit more complicated. Depending on the situation I could call you Ximi, Goku, Vegeta or even Kakarot."
The younger saiyajin blinks. "Kaka-what?"
All is quiet for a while.
"Never mind. It's ancient history." But then unexpectedly, Vegeta stands up as he feels a very familiar ki approach them. "Ximi, go inside," he whispers harshly.
"Dad, what-"
"Don't question me now," Vegeta snaps, looking over at the young teenager. "Just go to my room. It has your things in there already." Goku stares at his father for a moment, wishing that he's allowed to read what is going on in his mind. But what he can feel is...concern? "NOW!" his father yells again, his eyes trained above the city. Reluctantly, Goku nods and goes into the window of the highest floor to search out his father's room.
Meanwhile, Vegeta stands ready to face the visitor. The wind makes the newcomer's cape flutter gently as his soft boots pad on the roof of Capsule Corps not five feet away from Vegeta. The prince smirks, "Piccolo." The Nameck stares back, though it seems that is completely unfazed by the prince's sudden return from the dead.
"Vegeta," he replies, in the exact same curt tone as the saiyajin.
"Should I even ask what brings you here?"
Making a small huff, Piccolo glares at the saiyajin. "We all felt two monstrously large ki ever since this morning. The other warriors have gathered at the Lookout to prepare for battle while I scouted ahead."
Already amused by the Nameck's reference to those pathetic humans as warriors, Vegeta sighs with a mocking shake of the head. "You make such a subtle scout. Good job."
"I knew it was you from the beginning," the green fighter twitches, suddenly not so enthusiastic about the prince's return. "But I wasn't going to say anything to the others until I made sure."
"And the verdict?"
"You're the same asshole as before."
Vegeta smirks widely. "Damn right."
Not amused, Piccolo grates out, "Vegeta what about Son? I know that he's the one downstairs, so answer me straight."
The prince's smirk falls instantly, "Nameck, I don't want it getting out that he's their precious Goku. He's not. Bulma and I already decided that he is to pose as my half human son."
"What kind of reasoning is that!" Piccolo demands, his ire flaring as he clenches his fists.
Hn. As if that's intimidating, Vegeta thinks holding back a derisive snort. "...Would you like to see?"
In a moment, the two are outside of the prince's door, Vegeta knocking lightly on the wood. A young voice comes through startling the Nameckian warrior. "Come in!" When they enter, Piccolo is further assaulted by the sight of a young boy on the floor, wearing the prince's clothes, namely the navy blue spandex suit and armor which are almost loose on his ridiculously jaunt frame. In hand is a large, dry clay slate, encrypted in strange markings. Goku blinks and looks up at Piccolo with eyes as green as his own skin. There is no recognition in his eyes as he blurts out, "Dad, he's green!"
Vegeta snickers at Piccolo's speechless mouth, turning to the young saiyajin and pulling him to his feet. "Kakarot, this is Piccolo. He tried to kill you when you were a child."
Goku blanches, while Piccolo glares at the prince in irritation. "VEGETA!"
"I'm just ruining your first impression," the prince says with an innocent expression that should NEVER belong on his face. He lays a hand on Goku's shoulder and says, "Actually, green bean here will be your psychic sensei."
"Say WHAT!" the two of them exclaim simultaneously.
"You need to learn how to control these powers of yours, Ximi, and the cucumber is probably the best teacher that you can find."
Frowning in confusion, Goku begins to ask, "Wait...Is he a cucumber or a green-"
Piccolo twitches and interrupts the boy before he can make a fool of himself. "Vegeta, I'm flattered, but Goku doesn't have the mental capacity to-"
"He does now."
"But when can we-"
"We'll move up to the Lookout with you."
Grimly, the Nameck's lips thin as he regards the...mandate as a business deal. "...This is going to cost you," he finally says when he's done pondering.
"Fresh spring water imported from the Kiyomizudera temple in Kyoto."
...There isn't much else that a Nameck can say to that. "Done!"
Goku frowns at the exchange, while Vegeta starts to shoo the warrior from the room. "Go on, Cucumber-"
"So, he IS a cucumber!" the younger boy exclaims.
"-you should report back to those faithful warriors on the Lookout," the saiyajin no ouji continues, casting an entertained look at the young boy. With a look that threatened to grow worse with each passing second, Piccolo slammed the door as he left.
"So..." Goku starts once they are both alone, "did you tell Bulma-san we're moving?"
At that, Vegeta keeps his face carefully blank.
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In only half an hour, Piccolo had rounded up the confused fighters and brought them and their families to Capsule Corps for an impromptu get-together. Ever, careful in his ways Vegeta tries his best to disguise Goku, namely vigorous brushing of the bangs to make it resemble Trunks' and tying his crazy hair into a pony tail. From high atop the stairs to the ground floor, Goku peers down at the shadows of the gathering cast against the stair wall somewhat apprehensively. He doesn't recognize any one down there... Except for Bulma and her boys and Gohan and Piccolo, but they don't count.
Meanwhile Vegeta is still fussing with his bangs and a comb and a large bottle of gel. "Damn, this stupid hair of yours! It refuses to change!" Goku shivers when he feels yet another round of gel poured onto his scalp. "When you're down there, I'm going to be referring to you as Vegeta."
Goku blinks. "Let me get this straight. When it's just the two of us, you're going to call me Ximi or Ximitar. When it's in the family, it's Goku. And with everyone else you're just going to call me Vegeta?"
"...Yes."
"That's just so confusing!" the boy exclaims, his voice carrying to the group down below and making a few heads turn.
Tossing aside the comb and gel, finally satisfied with the boy's look, Vegeta smirks and starts pulling the saiyajin down the stairs. "Come on Vegeta. Time to meet your former subjects."
Nodding his head gravely, Goku descends the stairs and rounds the turn down to the heavily lit living room, decked out in spare Christmas decorations courtesy of Bulma's mother. Two immense stacks of pizzas lay on the table, ordered in from a 24 hour pizza restaurant. As well as plenty of bottles of sodas, especially for the fighters who had been on high alert ever since early in the morning and are now feeling the delayed stress. And for the first time in his memory, Goku sees his flock.
The senshi turn when they sense the two coming down and eyes wide they stare at the prince who has not changed a day over the years he had been gone and the strangely familiar teenage boy behind him. Vegeta's eyes surmise the group as well. Krillen changed, now sporting a mustache, which frankly to the prince looks like a hairy caterpillar. 18, by his side, had not changed a bit. And Marron looked on the brink of 12. At least she grew a nose though. Yamcha and Tien look much the same, if not a bit more refined by age, though the former bandit had grown a goatee and has a rather skanky little thing clinging on his elbow. Gohan doesn't look well at all, just recovering from his faint.
And ChiChi... ChiChi had cut her hair quite short, sporting light brown highlights, and clothes that look like they belong to a well off doctor's wife. But more importantly...she brought someone with her. Vegeta's eyes narrow as he regards the man. He looks a rather scholarly fellow with gold rimmed glasses, a brown tweed suit and a similar jaunty frame to Goku. Square chinned, dark hair and a goatee like Yamcha's though it was much trimmer.
And of course, the very first thing out of everyone's mouth is; "What happened to Goku?"
Gohan, the poor boy, can only blanch when everyone is blind to the obvious, but with a hard look from Bulma he clenches his mouth shut, looking very irritated. Vegeta coughs into his fist, looking up at the sorry bunch of hopefuls. "I'm sorry to say," he says, which is the very first indication that the fighters shouldn't believe him, "but Prince Goku never recovered from his coma and he wasted away."
Bulma gives him a hard kick to the shin. "All right, woman!" Vegeta snaps at her, annoyed that she ruined the fun before he could see the group's shocked expression. He sighs and winds out the story that the scientist thought would be acceptable to their ears with a resigned tone. "We both were whisked off to the dragon's realm and held as hostages and Prince Goku became a god, while I got sent back down here again."
The senshi look about themselves and say a collective, "That sounds about right." Vegeta rolls his eyes, exasperated that the fighters would take in the much more unlikely story.
Meanwhile ChiChi purses her lips and comes over to the teenager by Vegeta's side. "You look…very familiar. Just like my son." Goku's eyes widen just slightly. What? What does that mean? Isn't this woman supposed to…his wife? …His…mother? It's too much to even –
Vegeta's arm quickly comes up to sweep the younger saiyajin behind him. "That's MY son!" he growls, hiding the boy away before the harpy can get a good look at him.
Yamcha's mouth drops when he hears the slight commotion, "You dog! He's younger than Trunks is! I thought you said you'd die before having another half-breed mongrel!"
The prince's eyes flare in anger, his rage taking over him as the pathetic human not only manages to insult Goku but his other two sons as well. "I'll make you pay for that!" he roars, wresting the front of the bandit's shirt and pulling him down to come nose to nose with him. "I have never said that! He is no half blood mongrel!"
Perhaps Vegeta could have gotten away with that remark…if only he didn't freeze up and look like he said too much. Catching, the look across the prince's face, Krillen frowns, "What do you mean he's not a half-blood?"
"W – well, do you think I would give my namesake to just anyone?" He ignores Trunks' indignant glare and Goku's smug look.
Then Tien decides to put in a cent. "Who's the mother?"
"…What?"
Krillen nods as well, "Yeah, who's the mother? You say he's a full blooded saiyajin, but he's younger than Trunks is. So you're either lying or you managed to find some other saiyajin to impregnate."
To say it is unprecedented would be the understatement of the millennia…but Vegeta is at his wits end. "I – well, I-"
Suddenly, Goku speaks up. "Goku's my mother," he says quickly, managing to train every single set of eyes on him. Sweating profusively at all the looks, especially the utterly scandalized one on his father's face, one stuck between mortification and pure rage, Goku takes off the band holding his hair into a pony tail and then ruffles the sharp mold of the gel in his hair, letting it go back to its natural muss. This makes more than a few people gasp, especially ChiChi who looks like she's about to faint and her…whoever that is…is the only thing that is keeping her from falling to the floor. Gulping, the young saiyajin turns to his father, his eyes pleading for forgiveness. "I'm – I'm sorry about this Father, I know you wanted to keep this a secret."
Goku turns back to the shocked congregation, wringing his hands together as he flounders for words. "W – well, um, you see…Ever s – since my m – mother defeated Furiza, m – my father harbored a deep seeded obsession with him…that g – grew into a complete unadulterated desire for…my mother."
Strangely enough, the more hullabaloo that comes out of his mouth, Goku finds it easier to spit out some more. And so he goes on to spin the tale of Vegeta's undying passionate love for Goku which includes an elaborate yarn about how Vegeta went off into space in the futile attempt of finding his unrequited love and how the prince had dreamt of his obsession every night and would wake up screaming 'Kakarot!' The teenager doesn't even know where he's pulling all of these names and places and events from, but the group looks pretty convinced, so he decided to stay with it.
His audience is enraptured. Vegeta, however, looks ready to burst into tears. He actually does when Yamcha attempts to comfort him.
Then the story is finally ready to draw to an end. "And then… on the last night of the six days before Cell's death tournament… my father finally went to my mother in the very middle of the night and confessed his love to…him. Of course, my mother already knew that. I mean, it's kind of obvious when someone is THAT obsessed with you. That was the very night that I was…conceived…"
And then Vegeta faints.
Trying to ignore his unconscious father, the teenager continues, "But then when Goku died the next day, I died with him. But my mother was still pregnant when he went up to Heaven. That's why he didn't want to be wished back because he didn't want to have an abortion."
Goku nearly can't stifle a laugh as he finds it very amusing to watch some sort of enlightened expression sift through the fighters' faces at this hogwash. "So I was born in the Otherworld and raised there, even after my mother returned to Earth – a trip that was supposed to last a DAY – I might add. Then when my mother and father got whisked off to the dragon's realm I came to Earth with my father when he returned. And now – here I am."
The senshi are speechless.
That is until Yamcha snaps his fingers and declares, "I knew it! I knew there was something queer about someone who wore spandex day and night!" Then the party erupts into chaos.
ChiChi bursts into tears, pounding on her poor…something's unsuspecting chest, crying, "Oh, that evil hound! On the very night that Goten was conce3ived! How could he betray me like that!" Then she spies Bulma who is in fits on the ground, "Bulma! This is no laughing matter! Vegeta cheated on YOU, too! And they had a LOVE CHILD!" The scientist only laughs harder.
Meanwhile Krillen looks Goku over, studying him now, trying to discern the likenesses to his "parents." "Well, I definitely see the Vegeta in your expression. But aside from the hair, I don't see much Goku in you at all." The boy blanches.
And Vegeta, the poor prince, is put on the couch to be comforted by Marron and the woman who Yamcha brought along with him, which is not helping mattered at all. Gohan tries to comfort his mother, while both Trunks' try to stifle theirs. The rest of the party engage in reminiscent memories of the times when Vegeta had shown that he had a fancy for the only other saiyajin alive and quite surprisingly there are quite a few of them.
Piccolo, the only calm one in the group, pulls Goku away from Krillen's scrutiny and starts tugging the teenager up the stairs. "Hey! Where are you taking me?" Goku demands as they start for the private wing.
"I'm taking you to the Lookout early," Piccolo answers gruffly. "It's the only chance at survival you've got when Vegeta comes to."
