A/N:Hey there! Another new chapter! Geez, I'm just blowing through these! I know, I should be updating my other story, but... when inspiration hits, you gotta just let it flow. So, I don't know how good this chapter turned out... I think that inspiration I talked about has just about expired itself. But I wanted to introduce Inuyasha and Shampoo into the story. Too bad I had no idea how. Anyway, sit back, relax, and enjoy the show!

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ranma ½, Inuyasha, or Mark Twain, though all of the above are great subjects to consider. I love Mark Twain... such a funny man.

Chapter Three - Dogged Ties

"Clothes make the man. Naked people have little or no influence in society."

- Mark Twain, More Maxims of Mark, Johnson, 1927

Damn, it reeked. The smell of death hung about the air like a phantom. It was six-thirty in the morning, and there was nothing he hated more than working before ten a.m.. Well, that may be a bit of an exaggeration. If there was anything he hated more than getting up early in below freezing weather to spend hours of his time sucking up the nauseating odor of rotting flesh... well, it had to be spending the entire lovely experience wearing a damned Armani suit.

It wasn't the Armani, per se... it was the fact that he had to wear a suit at all. At least when he was investigating a case. Or when he had to hang around at the headquarters and look reasonable for his boss. And what a bitch she was... Why did he hate his job so much? Out of all the shit that came with being the man he was... it was the fact that he was so bored with his life that really nagged at his mindNothing happened. Despite what they lead the common citizen to believe... being a special agent is not all it's cracked up to be. It sucked.

So what was he currently spending precious Sunday hours doing, you might ask? Well, identifying a dead body, of course! What else? That and helping with the investigation... obviously. But that mainly consisted of giving the few police assigned to the case a good verbal lashing in order to get them really motivated. If he had to work his ass off all the time, so did they. At least while he was around.

He sighed, taking a slow, lazy walk around the entire expanse of the park. He had already identified the body. One of their agents. Now the FBI was involved, and he was the lucky son of gun that got to survey the situation.

The relatively young agent's thoughts drifted in and out of his cynical self pity, occasionally growling out his frustrations to himself. He had almost completely circled the park, when his foot bumped a heavy object that skittered away from his toes at his kick

"What the...?" He asked no one in particular as he pulled on a latex glove he carried around in his pocket for this specific purpose. Obviously, no one had inspected this side of the park yet. He'd just picked up a fucking gun! How could they miss this? He dropped the weapon into a ziplock bag which he also remembered to keep handy on a crime scene, and began his lazy saunter over to an idle police officer nearby.

"Hey lazy-ass, take this evidence to the officer in charge. It's important, so make sure he gets it." The man before him gave him a narrowed, dangerous glare. His dark hair was long and kept up in a ponytail, and he reeked of wolf. This man was, obviously, a yokai. Swell.

Their gazes locked briefly, each sensing the other's discomfort and unprovoked hatred. Kouga let out a mean growl from deep inside his throat, his eyebrows furrowed in anger, as if to say, 'Who the hell are you?' It was funny, the territorial instincts of their animal personalities that naturally carried into their daily human-like lives.

"What's going on, Kouga?" Akane questioned as she strode up to the pair. After overhearing the other's rude demand, she figured she had better step in before things got ugly. She waited several moments, allowing some open hostility between the two, before calmly snatching the bagged gun from the agent's clawed fingers.

"And you are?" She directed the question toward the seemingly silver-haired yokai. The said man turned violently on her, his golden eyes sparking with unspoken rivalry from his previous encounter. Obviously, the two men weren't going to become fast friends. Akane smiled, encouraging him to speak.

"Who are you?" He asked suspiciously, loosening his silk tie as he glared down at her. Akane's friendly smile abruptly turned sour. She stuck out a hand forcefully, knowing that politeness was the easiest way to deal with self-assured jackasses like the man before her.

"My name's Akane Tendo. I'm in charge here." She added, waving the evidence bag in front of his gawking eyes. He continued to look at her in an openly stricken, disbelieving way, until Kouga interrupted. By then, Akane had let her hand drop back to her side.

"Hey, the lady asked for your name. Don't be such an ass." Akane smiled at him, bemused, and gently scolded, "Kouga!" Initiating a warning growl from Inuyasha. The hanyou looked between the two, before settling his gaze on Akane.

"The name's Inuyasha. I'm an agent for the FBI. I'm here to supervise." He returned, gaining some semblance of intellect back. The woman was so... tiny. Delicate. Innocent. She obviously hadn't been on the job long. Akane nodded in acknowledgment, giving the hanyou a good once-over. He would have been annoyed if he hadn't done the same thing to her seconds earlier. They were sizing each other up, just as a good pair of crime fighters should do. Inuyasha scoffed.

"May I ask why you carry a sword, Inuyasha? A little behind on the times, are we?" Akane asked, grinning. She lifted a lazy hand in order to wave vaguely at the old sword attached to the agent's hip. Inuyasha scowled.

"It's a long story. You're so busy, I wouldn't want to distract you from your work." He added mock-sweetly eyeing the mess of an investigation before him. She was definitely new on the job. Akane scowled for a moment or two, before lifting her sunny face and replying with a false smile, "My men are confident enough on their own. But you're right - I have better things to do. So I'll see you around, Inuyasha." She turned her back on the two men, strolling back to her borrowed car to grab the coffee resting there. They regarded her silently, Inuyasha scowling deeply at her smugness, Kouga even more smug than Akane herself.

"She's one tough cop, that girl." Kouga laughed. Inuyasha gave him a dirty glare, muttered a "feh", and turned to re-examine the area where he had found the gun. By now his tie was so loose, it hung about his neck like a slack noose. Stupid job.


Shit. Just what he needed. Ranma sighed, surveying the park from a nearby rooftop. He slumped against the short brick wall surrounding the edge of the roof, and tossed the binoculars onto the ground so that they skittered to a halt in front of a heating system. The only microphone bug he had had with him the night before had been invested in the recovery of the disc. He had placed the minuscule machine in a jacket pocket of Akane's while she had struggled against him. He had heard everything from his perch on the roof's wall. Thus, the dread settling uneasily in his stomach.

Inuyasha, huh? And this Kouga guy was obviously a demon as well. A yokai with a good sense of smell was definitely not what he needed right now. But he being the lucky guy that he was, got not one, but two fucking hound dogs sniffing around his disc. What he needed was to get that damn information back into his possession before his boss figured out that the contact had been murdered and Ranma had screwed up. And that posed a whole other shit load of unanswerable questions and problems that Ranma really could have done without.

Who was that last night? How did they sneak up on him like that? There had only been two times in his entire career that Ranma had ever had to use a gun. The first time was against some lunatic named Saffron that tried to bomb Furinken Highschool. The second time was obviously... yesterday. Which led to yet another problem. He realized only too late that, although he had disposed of the mystery attacker's bullets from the tree trunk, he had forgotten about the two shots he had fired towards the unnamed assailant.

Now that FBI idiot - who was supposed to be on his side - was sniffing around the very spot he didn't want him to check. All of the unfortunate events of the past few hours seemed to crash down on him at once, and he was almost tempted to ask, "What else can go wrong?", but was beaten to it when he felt the familiar vibrations of his phone from deep inside his pocket. There was only one person that would dare contact him when he was on an assignment...

"Hello?" He groaned, his stomach turning over with dread.

"Nihao Airen! (A/N: is that how you spell it?)" Shampoo bubbled into the phone. "Shampoo call to ask how job go! Airen have time for date?" Ranma almost cried. His life sucked. He replied evenly, willing his voice to remain calm.

"Shampoo you're my partner, not my fiancé. I'm not gonna marry you. Got it?" The line remained silent for only a moment before she began sobbing into the receiver.

"Ranma so cruel to Shampoo!" Ranma sighed again, lifting a placating hand even as he realized she couldn't see him.

"Calm down Shampoo. I'm on an assignment, remember? But I have a favor to ask you, alright?" He heard nothing in response, and took it as an affirmation, so he continued.

"I ran into some trouble last night, and my contact was murdered. Now the disc is hidden in a tree at the crime scene, but the place is swarming with cops. I need you to pose as an officer and grab it for me. Can you do that?" Shampoo hesitated. How could she use this situation to her advantage? She smiled to herself schemingly, and answered, "Of course Shampoo can. But Ranma will owe Shampoo. Understand?" Ranma sighed again, this time with relief. Whatever the consequences, they were completely worth her saving his ass.

"You got it Shampoo. Anything you want." He added enthusiastically, too overcome with relief to realize what he had just gotten himself into. Shampoo laughed giddily.

"Anything?" She asked sweetly.

"Anything." was his happy reply. They said their goodbyes quickly, shifting into professional mode.

"I'll be right over." She chirped. Ranma nodded to himself. It was a good thing he had asked her to stick around her hotel for an extra day.


"Now where'd that wench go?" Inuyasha ground out irritably, His eyes scanning the park and it's occupants briskly. That woman was like a magician. Akane always seemed to disappear when he needed her. Oh well. None of his concern. He'd just turn over his findings to his lab, along with the gun he had found earlier. He knew it to be secured inside one of the officer's cars. It wasn't theft exactly... he'd just be saving the station some extra work.

The impatient hanyou pulled a small phone out of his designer pocket, and flipped the little piece of technology open, dialing buttons jerkily with one clawed finger.

"It's Inuyasha. I have some stuff I want you to analyze at the lab. Yeah, I'll get it to you right away. Okay, thanks." He replied breezily, snapping the phone shut and returning it to his pants.

"We do have a lab conveniently stationed just around the corner for the very purpose of analyzing evidence, you know. And I have reason to believe Akane has no idea you're planning on taking evidence from the crime scene... but that's just ridiculous - that would be stealing And obstruction of justice. You're obviously not the kind of lying, scheming man that would do something like that." Inuyasha winced, turning slowly to come face to face with yet another young woman on the job. His stomach sank with dread.

"Kagome. Nice to see you again." He added weakly as she continued to look him over with eyes that burned with repressed anger. She smiled sweetly at the young agent, tilting her head to the side until everything about her demeanor screamed 'cute'. Inuyasha froze in his spot, anticipating a very unfriendly welcome by his former co-worker.

"Oh, Inuyasha, don't look so tense." She sang out through her false smile. She continued, "There's no reason to be so formal. We're still good friends, eh?" She took several steps toward him, and Inuyasha was powerless against her advances. She lifted a dainty hand to his neck, fingering the beads that hung there. He cringed at the coolness of her fingers as they brushed his skin.

"My, it's been a long time since I've seen these. That was a rather rewarding experiment, don't you think?" She asked, tugging lightly on the beads for emphasis. She mumbled to herself, "Never thought I'd get so much use out of them." Inuyasha remained deadly quiet, afraid to speak.

"Aren't you going to say anything, Inuyasha?" She asked angrily, all pretenses of sweetness dropped. Kagome withdrew her hand quickly, as if it had been burned. She turned away from him, hiding her sorrowful expression as best she could behind the curtain of her hair. She never thought she'd see him again. It was just what she needed to end a perfect day of futile analyzing in a hopeless job. An old ghost from her past, coming back to haunt her. With a vengeance. And an Armani suit.


Shampoo strolled languidly into the midst of the frenzy... or crime scene, if you will. Her purple hair blew dreamily in the steady breeze, whipping around her flawless facial features and exotic violet eyes. She was clothed in a very professional ensemble - a dark knee-length skirt, beige button up blouse, and a pair of designer glasses that were sleek and intelligent. If there was one thing she enjoyed the most about her job, it was dressing the part. Too bad the blouse was a little tight around the chest area, and the opticals she wore held glass instead of lenses. It was also a shame that the slit along the side of her skirt reached just a bit too high on her leg for professionalism.

But, so long as she got the job done, Ranma was all hers. She smiled keenly to herself. Now to pull off a convincing act. She studied the officers around her, deciding which to approach. All seemed either very engrossed in their work, or very idle. She sighed, unsure who to propose her lie to, until her shrewd eyes caught sight of a quarreling couple halfway across the park, next to a rusty picnic table. Perfect.

She strolled up to the woman casually, looking very meek and embarrassed. Or at least, she hoped that's how she looked. She cleared her throat, keeping her eyes plastered to her stiletto heels, and smiled to herself as the woman continued bantering and yelling at the silently guilty-looking man in front of her. She was being completely ignored By the woman, but the man in front of her seemed quite aware of Shampoo's presence. Good. She took a step toward the frightening woman, tapping her lightly on the shoulder and clearing her throat once more. The engrossed woman halted in her tirade, giving Shampoo an irritated glance before straightening and smiling kindly in embarrassed surprise.

"May I help you?" Kagome asked, somewhat guiltily. Shampoo smiled back warmly, relief flooding her pretty features. She nodded shyly, reaching into the bag she carried with her, and pulling out a camera and other odd tools.

"Yes, Sh- I came to study bullet holes. Is tree here? With bullets, I mean." Kagome looked for a moment as if she didn't comprehend, but quickly donned an understanding expression. She exclaimed, "Oh yes! That tree over by the burnt trash can is the one. Hold on a moment and I'll come with you." Shampoo struggled to keep her expression pleasant. She didn't want the woman's company, she wanted her permission to leave.

"That not necessary." She reassured the analyst, who was about to wave off the comment, when she saw Inuyasha giving the woman an appraising look. Shampoo winked suggestively at him while Kagome's back was turned, and his cheeks flushed a light pink. Kagome looked between the two, before angrily dismissing Shampoo with a, "You know what? Maybe you should go on ahead. I'll be right there."

As soon as Shampoo had exited the scene, Kagome stomped her foot violently, catching Inuyasha' attention quite effectively. Her eyes burned contemptuously, and she growled in frustration.

"Inuyasha, you are so - Uh! You're such a pervert!" Inuyasha's ear twitched as her voice rose higher and higher. He turned his head away from her smoldering glare, embarrassment causing his cheeks to grow pink once more.

"Well, you're - you're a control freak! And a bitchy one at that! You act like it was my fault you left the agency!" That stopped Kagome in her tracks, and her expression grew darker. The air grew tense, Inuyasha grew more and more anxious with dread. He knew what was coming now...

"Inuyasha..." Kagome began, her voice dangerously low, "... Sit! Sit! Sit! SIT!" She screamed, allowing her frustrations to become evident in the venomous tone of that one powerful word.

"You're such a jerk!" She cried, referring to years past, when she was no more mature than a child. She fled despairingly after administering her wrath upon him, and all he could do was lie face down in the collapsed ground surrounding him. He ground out through a mouth full of grass and dirt, "That wench..."

But the abused hanyou knew one thing was certain - he had hurt her again. The only thing he had promised himself he would never do again... he promised he would never make her cry. So much for avoiding past mistakes. And he had lost his tie.


A/N: Yeah, okay. There you have it. Inuyasha has entered the story. I'm not sure how in character these guys are because, well, there are so many of them... I just can't keep track. I still have more people to introduce, dammit, and I think I'm getting a headache. Let me know how well you think the characters are... meshing... or if you don't think they are, let me know anyway. Thanks a lot.

Author's P.S. - did anyone catch the double meaning to the title? Or am I not half as clever as I think (or wish), I was:)

Author's P.P.S. - The more you review, the faster I update... hint... hint... yeah. Okay.