Once upon an evening in Midgar
Reno and Rude slowly walked down the street.
They were men of the Turks
And their job had its perks
But there was no challenge left for the elite.
With their enemy floored
They were really quite bored
So Reno said, "Hey, let's get something to eat."
-
Without saying a word
Rude just shrugged and continued his gait.
The stoic of the pair
He really didn't care
And figured most places near empty this late.
It was not very far
So they went to the bar
Therefore accidentally sealing their fate.
-
There was no bartender, even
As they entered the room and Rude found he had been right.
Just a woman was there
Playing with her hair
Sitting alone beneath one swinging light.
Reno ditched food
His expression turned lewd
And he strolled over, commenting, "Ain't you a sight."
He attempted to flirt
But it didn't quite work
As she said, "I won't stand with that shit. Not tonight."
Still bored beyond belief
He only gave her more grief
And she eventually angrily rose to full hight.
Reno was taller by far
But her gaze clearly said, "Rawr!"
So he held up his hands, saying, "Listen, babe, I don't want a fight."
-
She scoffed at this
And her eyes seemed to glow as she said, "Too late.
I'm in a bad mood
And you've been up to no good
So maybe on you I can take out my hate."
Reno blanched at the thought
As he knew that he ought
For he knew womanly wrath to be great.
-
She stepped back
And, cackling, threw her arms in the air.
With a puff of green smoke
Causing Reno to choke
She disappeared with the words, "Now try to get out, if you dare."
"Good job," said Rude.
"Hey, shut up, dude.
But, man, that chick can go out with a flair."
-
Reno moved to the entrance
And tried open the door with no luck.
Rude smirked, then frowned.
"Well, what now?"
Reno shrugged and was promptly attacked in the face by a duck.
"Oh, come on."
The duck was then gone
And replaced with a layer of muck.
-
"Okay, that's just gross."
Reno tried to wipe the stuff out of his hair.
The junk on his head
Rather smelled like the dead
But before much could be done he was glomped by a bear.
"Hey, that's my face!
What's up with this place?"
All Rude chose to do was stare.
-
Reno wrestled with it.
"Come on, Rude! Get her off! Get 'er!
I have no clue
What she's trying to do
But whatever it is, don't let 'er!"
Rude's tiny smirk grew.
"She seems to like you."
"That seriously isn't much better!"
-
Rude sighed.
"The only person to blame is you."
"How could I guess
She'd give me such a mess?"
"It's not like it's anything new."
Then down Reno fell.
"Ah, what the hell?"
He pulled out an orb. "Fire 2!"
-
"You realize that's arson."
"Who cares?" Reno shrugged as they walked from the crime.
"Not like it's my fault."
At that, Rude came to a halt.
He turned. "Reno, you cause stuff like this all the time."
"Okay, I fess up
But this is messed up.
I mean, why the hell is this whole thing in rhyme?"
A/N: It just came to me. I was totally making it up as I went along, so don't ask, because I don't know, either. I can't believe I wrote this...
