Candace throws her physics textbook across the room in frustration and screams into her pillow. Her hand darts to her cell phone, and she presses a speed dial icon. Before the person she called even has time to finish saying "Hello," she interrupts.

"Your dad's physics class is literally going to kill me."

"I know," agrees Vanessa. "I barely made it out alive myself. Who knew the evil streak would come out in the classroom?"

"It's not like it's an honors-level class. And when am I going to need physics, anyway? Physics has zero to do with my actual life."

"Well, it actually has a lot to do with your life," says Vanessa, "but probably not in a lot of ways you'll need to get into law school."

"Exactly! Whereas a big 'F' on my transcript will not increase my chances to become a lawyer."

"Why don't you ask Ferb for help?" Vanessa suggests. "He tutored me when I was in physics last year."

"If I were a mind reader, sure."

"What do you mean? Just ask him. He likes tutoring."

"But not speaking."

Vanessa laughs.

"What?" demands Candace.

"You're joking, right?" asks Vanessa. "My only problem with tutoring was staying on task and not going off on all the conversational tangents."

Candace blinks at the ceiling in confusion, then relaxes as she realizes Vanessa must actually be the confused one. "Ohhh, you mean Phineas tutored you."

"Nooo. I know which one of your brothers Ferb is. Green hair, British accent, lots of science knowledge, well-versed in the classics but not opposed to new forms of art?"

Candace shakes her head. "I seriously don't think we can possibly be talking about the same person."

"He helped me with my perpetual motion project, too. You saw it at the science fair."

Candace is glad to know that Ferb had a reasonable excuse to be standing around Vanessa that whole evening.

"He kinda reminds me of my dad, though he's certainly not that talkative. In fairness to my dad, though, I guess you have to pick up all the conversational slack when your best friend is ahhhh..."

Candace waits, but Vanessa doesn't continue. "Is a what?"

"Uhhh, is not, um...super chatty."

"Ugh, fine. I'll ask Ferb. I don't think he's finding middle school all that challenging, anyway."

"From his grasp on physics, I highly doubt that he is."

Candace says her goodbyes and hangs up, marveling at the mysteries of the public school system and wondering why she couldn't have gotten some of the science genes, like Phineas did. She gets up and walks down the hall to the boys' room, but although the door is ajar, she is met with resistance when she tries to push it open.

"Hang on!" yells Phineas. Flashes of light come from behind the door.

"What are you two doing in there?" she yells back. "Do I need to go get Mom?"

The flashes of light stop, the door swings open, and Candace is yanked into the room by her arm before the door is slammed shut behind her.

"We're actually getting an early start on Mom's Christmas gift," Phineas says, by way of explaining the partially-completed structure in the corner of the room, where Ferb is dressed in full welding gear.

"What is that supposed to be?"

"It's gonna be a self-cleaning birdbath, when we're done with it."

Candace looks at it from a few angles. "It looks like a modern art sculpture."

"That's Ferb's influence for you," Phineas says proudly. "He's quite the Renaissance man."

"Actually," interjects Ferb, "it's more futurism meets mid-century modern."

"Mom is...going to love it," says Candace. "Except for how it's going to freeze over as soon as she puts it outside."

Phineas snaps his fingers. "Ferb, I forgot to pick up the heating coils. I'll be right back. Thanks for the reminder, Candace!"

Ferb flips up his visor and surveys Candace silently when she doesn't leave with Phineas.

"Vanessa said you're a great physics tutor."

He shrugs, but he looks pleased. For Ferb.

"Can you maybe help me?"

He casts an eye back to the birdbath.

"After you're done," she offers. "I'll do your chores in the meantime, so those will be out of your way."

He throws her a thumbs-up and an emphatic head nod, so she knows they have a deal.

Maybe when they sit down for physics tutoring, she'll also ask him some questions about the classics.