Disclaimers: Final Fantasy VII © under Square-Enix, as well all other Final Fantasy references. Everything else under their respective owners.
Through Forest and Grove
Jason M. Lee
Chapter 12: That Which I Choose...
How much of a dark void can one person take?
She felt as if she had been floating for a very long time.
Rain, running, spells, something striking her, a familiar yell of despair...
'Sou ka...'
Moving, she winced when hot fire raced through her right side.
THAT. HURT.
Then, she wanted out. Out of this place of nothingness.
Determined, skinny legs began kicking toward the small prick of light above and one hand just touched it...
Eyelids that felt like cement blocks cracked open onto an unfamiliar ceiling.
Muffled beeps from a machine monitoring her vitals emitted its annoying sound at regular intervals, telling anyone who had a medical degree what her condition was at the moment.
The plain walls she had been expecting were not of the whitewashed kind but with actual coloring of a sky blue with birds in flight. Chairs that weren't the cheap type, looking cozy to sleep in it without waking up with a crick in one's neck. A TV with extra accessories hung from the corner at a comfortable angle, easily reachable from below. All indicated that she was in a room usually reserved for the higher-ups.
Turning her head, lilac caught sight of many flowers overflowing the windowsill and a nearby desk, some still in buds while others in full bloom. A couple of the containers were several types of wood found only in Wutai and she recognized most of the arrangements doubling as the pyramid of get-wells cards in its own corner. A single bamboo vase sat apart from the others, holding a red geranium in full blossom with a white plum branch.
One more sweep toward the opposite side revealed a mass of red hair on her sheets, the owner still save for the chest rising up and down.
She had seen him asleep before but never this peaceful. He always kept an ear and eye out, even when dozing at home.
Now, he looked more like a young boy than the Turk he was as the edges of dawn crept in. Messy locks were a bit longer and even wilder, the ponytail now nearly to his waist. The scars under both eyes seemed even more pronounced along with the dark rings. What the wrinkled shirt didn't cover a more muscular frame revealed wounds faint from a time long ago, other new ones scattered across pale skin carried an angry red of healing. Apparently, he had been at her bedside for a very long while.
Her lips twitched a bit at her iinazuke's devotion, touching somewhere deep inside her. This memory, she'll treasure it for the rest of her life.
As slender fingers weakly reached out, a warm hand grasped hers strongly.
"Hey, Turkey." Her voice was somewhat hoarse from lack of usage.
Dim sea-blue literally lit up.
"Morning, Princess."
Struggling to remember the date, she gave up.
"Did I miss anything?"
A smile unlike his usual smirks. More gentle.
"Nothing really, 'cept maybe a couple days of clean up."
A feeble chuckle.
"You'll have to tell me sometime."
Lavender blinked when he drew in close, blushing at his proximity.
"Remember what you said about you falling and not being able to get back up?"
She nodded weakly.
Rough digits slipped a ring that wasn't gold onto her ring finger. The bright sunlight caught and reflected the different colors, creating a rainbow against the walls.
"If you're falling," he rested his forehead against hers, voice soft, "then I'll fall with you and we'll fly back up. It doesn't mean anything anymore if you're going to fall by yourself."
Fighting back tears and failing, she let them fall.
"Baka Reno. Baka, baka, baka..."
He smiled wider, letting her arms wrap around him tightly.
"That's who I am, Yuffie."
x x x x x x x
"He'll be tried and if not the death penalty for attempted manslaughter, I'd say life."
"That's good. The rest?"
Clunking of a can falling from a vending machine, then a pop.
"Put their rap sheets together and you get enough legalese to make you dizzy." He winced as the bitter flavor hit his taste buds. "I like green tea better..."
"I think you're turning Wutai," Tifa teased, poking him in the side. Several days of full rest at the insistence of doctors when they found out she had nearly exhausted herself bought back some color to her skin. The martial artist/barkeep still got tired when she tried to do any real strenuous activities, and said physicians wanted to keep her in just to make sure.
"You won't catch me writing with a brush any time soon."
Stretching, Tifa looked out over Midgar, sunlight replacing clouds from nearly a week of wet stuff. It was as if nothing of a street war or battle between titans had occurred.
"I wonder what's going to happen now?"
Luminescent river looked over.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean about you and Reno." Calloused fingers grazed yellow hair that was spikier than ever. "Both of you have changed so much and so little, it's kinda scary."
Setting down his can, Cloud silently mulled over what she just said. Truth be told, he WAS frightened by what had just happened to him and his older sibling. Stronger, faster, enhanced senses, and the power... Sweet power right at their fingertips, ready to use at almost any time wherever they pleased to do so. That first time, they didn't know control but both wanted to do it one more time.
Hot blood rushing through their veins at electrifying speeds...
The painful thrill as powerful wings and tail sprouted out...
Talons gouging through reinforced steel and concrete like hot knife through butter...
Heat from a fully charged Mega Flare...
"Cloud!"
He blinked, snapping out of the reverie he had fallen into.
Worried burgundy eyes focused onto his face.
"Your eyes..."
"...gold?"
She nodded. "Tell me?"
Cloud clenched his fist, then opened, staring at his palm as if he could seek all the answers.
"Earlier, there were these voices in my head that kept going about doing something but I shrugged it off because I was concentrating on Reno at the time. As we fell, the only thing running through my mind was to live and that's what probably triggered it. When I... we... changed, it was one of the most exhilarating and painful thing that has ever happened to me in my life. I didn't had to worry about anything at all... nothing."
His back still itched, especially where his shoulder blades were.
"To feel the wind beating beneath my wings, crushing concrete like it was just a snowball, and letting loose Mega Flare... It was as if parachuting from the Highwind and pulling off Omnislash at the same time. I don't know, it's kinda hard to describe but that's as close as I can think of. Wild doesn't even match it. The feeling... it's intense. Much more so than the time me and Zack were subjected to the infusions. Like fire burning inside of me. Despite all that, it still scares me. Reno as well but he'll never admit it out loud, save Yuffie."
"And the voices?" 'Please don't let it be like before...'
"Disjointed, screams, demanding," he replied, sounding hollow. "The only thing I could barely make out was pain and revenge. It was so loud in my head, so many yelling at the same time. Different from then."
Tifa plucked the cold coffee can from its spot, sipping some. "Those poor souls."
"Most wanted Reno dead more than me. In the end, they wanted both of us to suffer as they did."
Sable laid against him. "Are they at peace now?"
He sighed, shifting to make her more comfortable. "The majority were sent back to the Lifestream. We might need Reiko to perform a ritual just to make sure but, yes, most are at peace."
Silence, except the usual hospital sounds.
"How is it like?" Her eyes closed, enjoying his warmth again. "To fly?"
"To fly..."
"Cloud?"
Straw locks shifted, a ring of six hues settling onto her finger.
Surprised garnet-mahogany orbs widened, looking into Mako sapphire.
"To fly alone, it's nothing." He smiled. "To fly with someone else is worth more than anything on the Planet."
Strong arms around his neck nearly caught him off-guard, sending them crashing to the floor and the empty can clattering about. He returned the gesture (not as violently), stroking her hair protectively and tenderly. Soothing, quiet nothings were whispered into her ear as she silently poured her emotions out, tightening her hold.
"Never forget. Don't ever forget."
He brushed his nose with hers.
"Then we'll create new memories, together."
x x x x x x x
"Let me out."
"No."
"Let me out."
"No."
"Let me out."
"No."
Angry pale purple, matching still pale skin.
"LET. ME. OUT."
Amused glowing aquamarine, a fanged grin.
"No."
"Fraggit, Turkey, I want out of this be--GACK!" A multitude of coughs halted her mid-sentence, leaving her breathless for a moment.
"That's why, Princess," Reno cheerfully answered, helping his fiancée with a glass of water. "Doc says you're still not ready to be back on active duty. Don't even think of trying to get that cast off either, no matter how much it itches or annoys you."
"Whyzat?"
To that, he stayed silent.
"Cuz the last time Mr. It-Clashes-With-My-Hair here tried it, he needed TWO casts," Elena quipped, poking her head in with a bright smile and a box.
Yuffie perked up. "Laney! What'd he do?"
The blonde Turk grinned widely, closing the door behind her and settling herself on the bed. Reno had moved toward the window, waiting the inevitable.
"Nearly wasted his left forearm after Sector 7. When the doctor said pink was the only color they had left, Sparky here bolted, dislocating his shoulder by running into an ambulance."
"It's the morphine, I tell ya," he muttered. "Somebody screwed up the morphine..."
Elena nonchalantly waved her senior's grumbles off, mirth still in her eyes. "After Rude and I found out (and had a good laugh), Reno tried to get it off. Oh, by the way, Reeve says hi and he sends his regards, along with a visitor that security would probably kick me out for." A furry head popped out from the box, meowing in relief after landing on the hospital bed and curling up.
"Heya, Sith-chan." Long fingers stroked the black and white cat purring like a motor in her lap. A look of glee was on the younger woman's face. "What'd he do? Scissors?"
"He's more of a leftie than ambidextrous, not to mention he wouldn't even be able to cut through the fiberglass. Mako enhanced or not."
"Would've shot the piece of shit off..."
"And raise our health premiums again? Yeah right! Anyway, Tseng later took a jigsaw away from him. Had he not, Reno here would be like Wallace today. Rude also confiscated one of those small hacksaws when the dummy tried it again."
The young Wutaian looked at her male counterpart. "What WERE you doing?"
"Paperwork," Reno grumbled. "Gya-ha-ha wanted me back on active duty immediately but Boss-man got me with desk work instead. I HATE desk work."
"Then, lunchtime rolls around. I don't know where he went exactly but Rude told me that what he thought was hydrochloric acid turns out to be just pine-scented detergent! Tried to melt the cast off his arm."
If she could, Yuffie would've burst out laughing but the cast (thankfully a light blue) and her weakened state prevented her doing so. Instead, she settled for just grinning broadly at the mortified redhead, who was doing his best trying not to remember the upcoming incident.
"Did Turkey get it off?"
An 'are you kidding me!' glance from Elena. "As if! Reno did something so stupid I still can't believe he pull it!"
"Say it! C'mon, Laney!"
'Not gonna change right here, not gonna do Mega Flare... Not gonna change right here, not gonna do Mega Flare... Not gonna change right here, not gonna do Mega Flare... NOT gonna strangle Laney...'
Sith flattened his ears when a small, blue spark flickered from Reno.
"Snatched his nightstick right off of Tseng's desk, ran back to his office, charged the sucker all the way up, and--"
"Laney..." came out in a growl, more irritated than angry.
A plastic cup bounced off of his head, Elena being quite proficient with handguns. "Save it for later, senpai. Tseng found the moron on the floor with his other arm in the wrong angle. Someone forgot that fiberglass isn't good at insulating against electricity."
Yuffie had to clamp down her mouth to keep any of the medical staff from bursting in. "Another cast!"
An evil grin. "Guess what color."
"...gonna kill that doc..."
"Pink, again."
"Oh, Leviathan! Thanks a bunch, Laney. Need that. I am SOOOOOO getting sick of hospital food! And those needles, I hate needles. And those annoying nurses (What I wouldn't give for my Materia). AND the AC (What's with it?) they constantly keep on."
Winking of one light brown eye. "Don't worry, Yuffie. I had a quick look at your clipboard and you'll be getting out of here in a couple days. You'll still need to keep the cast on for another week or two, so take it easy."
A loud whoop sent Reno plugging his ears and Reeve's cat scrambling back into the box, Elena hastily leaving before security could arrive.
A sudden grin popped onto Yuffie's face as she turned toward her fiancée after a moment's silence.
'Ah, shit...'
x x x x x x x
'How odd with the calm after the previous days' mess.'
The anxious activity was now dropped to its usual slow pace, although one can see medical staff and interns alike napping in places where it looked comfortable enough.
Checking in at the front desk, Thau thanked the blushing receptionist and made his way to the elevators. He had to share the ride with two nurses, both looking as if the world was on their shoulders and all they wanted was the Sandman to put them out of their misery, if only temporary.
"Long night?"
A bleary eye opened. "You have no idea, sir. It's almost as crazy when the Sector 7 plate dropped and the head staff order supplies to be rushed over to Sectors 6 and 8."
"At least it wasn't as bad as Meteor," the other nurse mumbled sleepily. "That was close to pure hell."
"First day?"
A yawn that nearly split his face. "Just got started on my internship, and then--BAM!--chaos all over the place. It was so much quieter back in Mideel..."
Thau nodded and stepped off with a wave at the exhausted students. Heels clicking softly on the floor, he began counting the numbers on the doors of the private wing. Most of the rooms were empty, considering this wing was reserved mainly for those that could afford the lavish treatment but a few held long-term patients, all resting peacefully.
Reaching the nameplate bearing Yuffie's surname, he was about to swing the door open when slow breathing reached his sharp ears. A small smile broke onto his face when he peeked in.
Yuffie was now sleeping again but with Reno alongside her on the bed, mindful of the tubes and wires leading to the various machines. His shoes had been kicked off apparently, one in the small washroom and the other on a chair. The overhead TV was on but the volume turned down, the remote near the redhead's hand. One arm had snaked itself around her waist in a hold that spoke of possessive and protectiveness.
Quietly leaving those two alone, Thau checked in the next room. Reeve had thankfully requested that both Tifa and Yuffie's lodgings be right beside each other. Despite his past ties with ShinRa, the hospital staff were all too happy to do so for two people who had helped saved their existence.
Again, the same scene of sleeping for Tifa and Cloud, except he was resting his head on the sheets, one hand holding hers. Surrounding the desk were cards with childish scrawls as well vases of flowers from various well-wishers.
Figuring that he wasn't needed, a quick trip down to the hospital cafeteria along the way to the gardens. Outside, a cup of steaming java mocha sat in front of him, half-lidded gold orbs watching patients and visitors walking in the crisp November air.
"Gil for your thoughts?"
Looking up, Thau noticed a man a little younger than his age, book tucked under the arm with a filled mug. Dark mullet matching Mako eyes that noticed almost everything with calculating skills. The stance was relaxed, most likely once with the ShinRa SOLDIER program. A bit of stubble that wasn't neglected but on purpose for image.
"Seat taken?"
"Help yourself."
"Hope you don't mind my intruding," the other man started, sitting down, "but I've noticed you had something on your mind for a long while."
"And you know that how, Mister..."
A flash of white teeth. "Call me Snake. I read people. You don't seem to be of the type to be brooding often. Not unless you royally screwed up something before."
"Would abandoning your own children before they knew you count?" Thau spoke lowly. He didn't mean to spill it out but it had been kept inside for so long, he might as well tell it to a stranger. "As well two different wives?"
Snake raised an eyebrow. "Depends on the situation. If you left for reasons that wasn't necessary, basically the usual ideas, then you're a scumbag. If you left because there was something that had to be dealt with immediately and you can't find your kids after it's done, then I suppose it's not so bad."
"Then what if they hate you? Just because you left before they knew you? I... I had to leave for reasons they understand but we're still having difficulty getting along. The reason was that it more or less directly involved them."
"That, I wouldn't know. Although, have you tried seeing it their view?"
Confused light honey blinked.
"Thought so. Look it at from your kids' perspective: they've never seen or met you properly until just recently. The only thing they can go by are the stories from their mothers' memories. Their moms always hoped that you would return so all of you could be one big family. Unfortunately, Fate decides to be, pardon my language, a bitch and decides to screw up both of your wives' happy little lives. One kid winds up this way, the other that way, worrying their moms and you to no end. Along this messed up road of life, you find out what they've done ties into what YOU were working on to protect them."
"How did--"
"Told ya, I read people. Anyway, once everything is all done and that (dust settled, etc., etc.), you find out that your wives have left for the next world and both kids somewhat hate your guts once all of you met. Now, the three of you are at a point where you don't know where to go or it's along the lines of 'two steps forward, one step back' kind of thing. Although something tells me that the brats have significant others, smacking some common sense into them with the proverbial slap to the face."
Thau had to chuckle a bit at the whole revelation. Only a few comments and this guy has him pegged down almost all the way.
"You're good."
An indifferent shrug as Snake took a long drink. "Used to be one of the top interrogators in SOLDIER before old ShinRa went belly up. Now, I'm teaching rookies that want to be with SWAT in Sectors 2 and 4."
"Why so interested in my case? You're no psychologist or a psychiatrist."
Snake hesitated. "Personally or professionally?" He rarely hesitated.
"Personally," Thau bluntly replied. If this truth was going to hurt, it'd be no different than the rift between him and his sons. Not to mention lack of psychological hassles with psychiatric appointments.
"You asked for it." A soft clink as the mug sat down and dark Mako bore into bright gold. "Because I see a complete idiot who is about to pull one of the stupidest acts I have seen one too many times in this life. I am damn sick of seeing it so listen carefully.
"YOU, were starting to go on this guilt trip of not being there for your kids. You go down that path right now, you'll be literally facing hell."
"Ah..."
"YOU, were going to turn into a goddamn, fucking pleaser. To which I think for a guy is one of the worst things to turn into." A pause. "Then again, there are others."
The larger man winced. It wasn't as if he was consciously considering THAT...
"Another thing, you're acting selfish."
Surprise. "Selfish?"
"Yep. Selfish as in wallowing in all of your self-pity, which leads back to the guilt trip and pleaser issue. Ignoring those surrounding your kids' circles as a best example. What about their friends? They might want to know you as well, so climb back up that wall. If their buddies trust you, then maybe they'll start trusting you."
"But--"
The mug raised threateningly. "Don't make me pour this coffee over you, buster. I've said it before and I'll say it again: find alternatives to close that freakin' rift between you morons. Best option now, talk. If you haven't been regretting it since then, they will eventually. I should know, I've been there."
Not for the first time had Thau been silenced by such simple words. The last time had only been by two other people he held very close to his heart... and they're already gone. He had to admit, the three of them had made a bit of progress in the past few weeks but the animosity was still there.
Sudden beeping brought him out of musings, seeing Snake answering his PHS.
"Yeah... Nothing really, just having a chat... Squirt'll be fine, then... Again? Gotcha..." A bright grin got onto his face. "Roger that, ma'am. Seeya."
A wistful look. "Wife?"
"Easy to tell, huh? I'm here because one of my boys broke his collar bone and arm. Crazy really, tried to fire one of the confiscated WP5 and nearly blew his limb off. Better teach them the ropes when he gets out."
If Snake noticed the wide-eyed stare on the other man's face, he ignored it.
"Gotta go, kid's causing a ruckus again. Don't forget what I said." Tucking the book under his arm, the ex-SOLDIER snapped off a salute and left.
Thau continued sitting while holding his chin, coffee all but forgotten.
A/N: Reno's pink casts of Pretty in Pink and health premium joke courtesy of Zeng Li, in which the latter is from her webpage. The "falling" reference to Jess Angel's Falling with Madness. Both can be found on ff (dot) net.
Snake is under Hideo Kojima's Metal Gear Solid series. Which Snake? I'll let the readers pick but I'm more fond of Solid than Naked, despite the two of them having ties relating to each other. And there we go, some more inspiration to my madness, as well some spoiling for fans who haven't played the series yet (I read/watch/play too much for my own good). Thanks a lot, Kojima-sensei.
"Unfamiliar ceiling" from Neon Genesis Evangelion of creator Hideaki Anno and GAINAX.
