A/N: Wow that took a long time to write. That there is twelve pages which makes it the longest chapter of this story. Sorry for not updating this sooner but I recently got my muse Pandora back. I hope you like this chapter! Now shoo! Quit reading this ramble and read the story… SHOO! LOL

Ambrosine thought

"Riku…" thought of what someone said

"Sora…" normal talking

Riku sat at the foot of Ambrosine's bed staring at her as she slept. She looked semi-peaceful and in the moonlight, she looked like a goddess. A sigh escaped his lips as he thought of the three weeks that had passed since they came back to Hollow Bastion. Nothing much had happened except for Ambrosine telling him that she wanted to act as though nothing had happened. She did a pretty good job of playing off the old Am, but at night she'd be plagued by nightmares and would wake up screaming.

Looking next to Ambrosine, Riku saw the sleeping form of Morrigan curled up with a pillow. Morrigan offered to sleep in Ambrosine's bed in case something happened. Aeris also offered to share a bed with Yuffie for the same reason. The girls were in good hands, but Riku had to occasionally check on Ambrosine for himself. This was one of the many times when he'd just stare at her wishing her pain was all gone. Shaking his head he turned to walk out of the room only to have a sleepy feminine voice stop him.

"Riku what are you doing here?"

Looking over his shoulder he saw that Ambrosine was sitting up in her bed staring at him with what seemed like empty eyes. No matter how much she tried to play it off, Ambrosine no longer had a gleam in her eyes. The only thing he could see was a void, but at times he'd see fear or sadness appear in her eyes. Every time he saw that look in her eyes all that came to his mind was:

Gods how I want to take your pain away…

Smiling softly at Ambrosine he quietly went back to his former place on the bed, and in a low whisper he spoke to her.

"I just wanted to check on you."

"You didn't have to. I've been doing better now."

She gave a soft smile but Riku saw through her exterior.

"You know me babe, I gotta check for myself… Oh don't forget Ansem's friends are coming tomorrow."

The smile faded from Ambrosine's face as she nodded. She said goodnight to Riku before lying down again, and watching Riku leave the room. Tomorrow was notgoing to be fun at all.

♣ ♣

It was the next day and everyone was in the main hall awaiting the arrival of Ansem's friends. Riku was leaning against a wall looking around for Ambrosine, but she was nowhere in sight and neither was Morrigan. At that second though, he saw both Ambrosine and Morrigan entering the room in a haste pace. When they met up with Riku, they both leaned against the wall beside him and sighed. They stared at each other having one of their silent arguments over who knows what. Unknowingly he put a hand on Ambrosine's shoulder, but didn't realize he had done it until he felt her tense up at his touch. Cursing to himself he told her who it was and she slowly calmed down. He was about to ask her what she and Morrigan were arguing about, but decided against it when the main doors opened.

In the doorway stood Ansem in the middle of his friends who were behind him in two diagonal lines. Left of him there was Larxene, Vexen and Marluxia while in the right diagonal line stood Axel, Zexion and Lexaeus. Everyone bowed in welcome as Ansem and his friends entered. As they walked in, Larxene stared at Ambrosine and when Ambrosine caught this, she glared at the blonde girl causing Larxene to smirk as she stopped before Ambrosine.

"Sleep well Am?"

"Like a lamb." Ambrosine said now standing with her arms crossed over her chest.

Larxene raised an eyebrow as she and Ambrosine just stared at each other for a few moments before Larxene hugged Ambrosine out of the blue. Putting her lips to Ambrosine's ear she whispered something unknown to everyone around them, but they were shocked to see Ambrosine push Larxene away from her knocking the said girl on her butt. Larxene had a look of shock on her face as she looked up at Ambrosine who now had her hands clenched into fists. Ambrosine stood glaring at Larxene for a few moments before turning her back on the girl and walking away. As she walked off everyone stared at her trying to register what had happened.

"What the hell did you do to her Larxene?" Riku demanded when Ambrosine was finally out of sight.

"N…nothing. I just hugged her for a few moments then she threw me off. Can someone say anger management?"

Riku glared at the young blonde as Axel helped her up. He then looked at Ansem before walking off to find Ambrosine followed by Morrigan and Sora.

"Well… that was an interesting way to be welcomed wouldn't you say Ansem?"

Looking to the source of the voice, Ansem saw that Vexen was the one who spoke up. In reply, Ansem just nodded as he led his friends to the library telling everyone left that they were dismissed. The remaining people just stared at Ansem as he left cursing him in their heads since they had to get up very early only to see his friends and say hello then be on their merry ways again.

"Well who's up for breakfast? I need something to keep me from running to Ambrosine's room… so we're all hungry? Good I'm off to the kitchen…"

They didn't even get a word in as Aeris started making her way to the kitchen. Yuffie was about to walk in the direction of Ambrosine's room when far off she heard Aeris call her into the kitchen. Mumbling, Yuffie made her way to the kitchen followed by Cloud, Squall and Cid.

♣ ♣

Ambrosine ran into her room slamming the door behind her and leaned against it. The nerve of that… BITCH! Sliding down to the floor she brought up her knees to her chest, wrapping her arms around them before replaying in her head what Larxene had said.

"You make a lie look beautiful since you are a beautiful lie yourself. You were so beautiful during your show that I wouldn't mind seeing it again. Although I'd prefer to be in the show with you rather then him…"

That was when she pushed Larxene away. Not only had she seen Ambrosine raped but she wanted to do it herself! Shaking her head she walked over to her window and opened it letting the fresh morning air consume her mind. Sitting on her ledge she stared out at the mountains far away and sighed. She should have just ignored Larxene but what she was said was just-

"Ambrosine, you ok?"

Turning away from her window, Ambrosine saw Riku in her doorway with Sora and Morrigan behind him.

"I'm fine."

"Then what the hell happened back there with Larxene?" he asked walking up to Ambrosine.

"She got too close. If you don't remember, I don't like people touching me much. I can handle a hug from you but barely can I handle it. She has no right to wrap her scrawny arms around me and it doesn't help much that I hate her fucking guts!" Ambrosine said yelling the last part.

Riku flinched a little at Ambrosine's yelling but didn't show it. Instead he looked over to Sora and Morrigan.

"Can we be alone you two?"

"I wanna talk to Morrigan first. Alone."

Morrigan entered the room and stood by the door as Riku walked out of the room, closing the door when he left. Ambrosine turned back to the window letting a silence fill the room as Morrigan made her way to her best friend.

"What's wrong Ambrosine? Did Larxene do something or say something or-"

"Oh she said something the little wench… But that is not why I wanted to talk to you alone."

Now Ambrosine turned around to face Morrigan in the eye. Something in the silver eyes made Morrigan scared of what was about to be said. The silence was unbearable and Ambrosine just stared Morrigan in the eyes before looking to the ground.

"I want you to be with me when I see the Fairy Godmother… She's supposed to be coming today I want you with me when she's here."

Morrigan let out a breath she didn't know she was holding and glared at Ambrosine.

"You had me scared for a minute there! I thought you were going to tell me something horrible!"

I'm afraid that what I might hear will be horrible…

"Sorry about that…" Ambrosine said softly smiling.

"Can I ask you a question? What was that between you and Riku?"

"I don't know… I just lost it. It seemed like he was trying to lecture me about her when he doesn't even know how that little wench really is."

"He wasn't. He just wanted to know what had happened and he's worried about you."

Sighing Ambrosine walked over to her bedroom door and opened it to find Riku sitting on the floor a few feet away.

"I know… Okay Riku lets talk. Morrigan, I'll talk to you later…"

Riku entered the room and Morrigan left closing the door behind her. Ambrosine looked at Riku who was already sitting on her bed and sighed. She felt really bad for yelling at him but when it came to Larxene, she couldn't contain her anger.

"I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to yell at you it's just that-"

"I know. I'm sorry too. I'm just worried about you."

"Why do I feel as if I've heard this before?" Ambrosine asked with a scoff as she sat beside Riku.

"Why are you doing this? Pushing me away?"

"Because it's what I'm good at. I don't like people getting too close especially now after all this has happened…" As she said the last part, Ambrosine put her head down averting her eyes from Riku's.

Riku put his hand under her chin and slightly lifted her face so he could look at her. Her eyes were still looking down but they came up to meet his when he brushed a strand of hair away from her face.

"Don't look away from me. I want you to look at me with your eyes because you have done nothing wrong in mine. Also they are beautiful and I like seeing them. Nothing should stop you from looking at me. If anything I should avert my eyes from you because I could have helped you… I-"

"Could a, should a, would a. Riku you could have done nothing that I didn't try to do. I fought my way through them once and even if it costs me my last breath I will fight my way through them again if I have to, even though last time I wasn't so successful."

"But that's just it Am. I don't want you to waste your last breath on them. You shouldn't have to do it anyways. I wasn't there last time but if they come again they will have to get through me to get through to you. Hell they would have to get through Cloud, Squall, Morrigan and even Aeris to even glance at you and Yuffie. I know you don't like it but I want to protect you. I want to be the one you can turn to when-"

"I can turn to you. I do turn to you. I can't believe I'm going to say this, but I feel safe in your arms. In Destiny Islands I felt as though I was home and that nothing could touch me. It was just you, me, the paopu tree, and the waves crashing softly against the island. I know this might sound like something from a horrible romance novel but I felt as though-"

A knock on the door stopped Ambrosine from finishing her sentence. Mentally she cursed the timing. She was actually about to tell Riku her feelings instead of being the heartless little bitch she had been for a while. Sighing she walked over to her door and saw the Fairy Godmother when she opened it.

"Fairy Godmother you're early. Um, I'll be right with you."

Looking over to Riku, Ambrosine smiled softly as she asked him to leave so she could talk to the elderly woman. Riku agreed and told her they would finish their conversation later. Nodding Ambrosine saw to it that Riku was gone and went to fetch Morrigan before talking to Fairy Godmother. When Morrigan was finally with her, Ambrosine closed her door and told the elderly woman to make herself comfortable. When both Morrigan and Fairy Godmother were comfortable Ambrosine finally spoke of the reason she called Fairy Godmother.

♣ ♣

"Again I would like to apologize for Ambrosine's behaviour earlier. She normally doesn't act that way but recently we've had some trouble and she hasn't been the same since."

"We know she isn't that way which is why we're shocked…"

"Yea normally she's delicate, soft and…sweet." At the last part Larxene licked her lips before smirking.

Vexen rolled his eyes at Larxene before looking at Ansem.

"We've met her before and last time she was very friendly."

"I thought she put up a struggle last time…" Lexaeus mumbled under his breath.

Glaring at Lexaeus, Larxene smacked him on the arm telling him to shut up. Lexaeus glared back at the girl who was now smiling at Ansem. Axel, who was sitting beside Lexaeus, wondered what the said male meant by her putting up a struggle. Last time they met, Ambrosine had talked to Axel and they became fast friends. Then again Axel had been away for a few months doing some business in Twilight Town and just recently he had returned in time to journey to Hollow Bastion with the others.

"Anyways back to the reason we came all this way. We have-"

The talking was stopped by the library doors being thrown open. Looking down the group saw that Ambrosine was walking their way and that she was beyond pissed off. Walking up the stairs, Ambrosine's eyes seemed to glow as she stepped before them when she was finally upstairs.

"Ambrosine what is the meaning of this?"

"Oh nothing Ansem. I just thought I'd come and apologize to Larxene. Can I speak to you alone Larxene?"

Smiling Larxene stood up and excused herself as she walked toward Ambrosine then down the stairs.

"Sorry for barging in like that. Please continue."

Ambrosine then walked down the steps and lead Larxene out of the library where when the doors closed, she pushed Larxene against a wall.

"Oh first you want me alone and now you treat me roughly… I like it."

"You sick bitch. Not just you but your friends are fucking sick too. You guys raped me not once but TWICE and now guess what? I'M FUCKING PREGNANT!"

Larxene didn't flinch when Ambrosine yelled at her. Instead she leaned against the wall and smirked.

"Oh really? I never would have thought that. I mean they raped twice so I think that's what they wanted. Unfortunately I couldn't be part of the festivities. Only Vexen, Marluxia, Lexaeus and Zexion could do it because they're male. You didn't think just one guy did it did you? Oops there went the surprise…"

Ambrosine slapped Larxene hard across the face as she pushed the girl against the wall clenching her shirt in a fist as she leaned in so close her she could feel Larxene's breath against her face.

"Just like when you were about to be raped the second time around and I was leaned in close to you."

"You're gonna pay for what you did. Even if I die while trying I will get you back and believe me Larxene, you aren't going to like it. Or maybe you will since you are sick like that. You'll get what's coming to you soon. Very soon."

With that, Ambrosine let go of Larxene's shirt and walked away down the hall to the lift stop. Rolling her eyes Larxene straightened out her shirt before walking back into the library with a smile on her face.

♣ ♣

"I need to know if I'm pregnant."

"What? Why are you asking me this?"

"Because I need to know. Just work your magic on me and tell me if I'm pregnant or not."

"…My dear child I'm sorry to say that you are in fact pregnant…"

"How did I know you would say that?"

Morrigan still couldn't believe what had happened when the Fairy Godmother visited. To Ambrosine's horror she found out that she was pregnant with her rapist's baby. Of course Ambrosine didn't take it too well as she broke down crying holding her stomach. Morrigan tried to comfort her but she couldn't come up with any words to make her friend feel better so instead she held her friend stroking her hair as Ambrosine continued to cry. The Fairy Godmother took this as a sign to leave and Morrigan thanked her for coming before going back to her friend.

They sat together for a good while with the only sounds being Ambrosine's sobs and Morrigan's hums trying to soothe Ambrosine. After a while Ambrosine's sobs had stopped but they still sat together with Ambrosine's occasional hiccup.

"You know Am, you're gonna have to tell Riku about this. He's going to notice your stomach growing."

"I know… But first I need to deal with something. Gather up Riku and the gang then meet me in the kitchen ok?"

Nodding Morrigan watched as Ambrosine wiped her eyes and left the room.

It had been a few moments after Ambrosine left and Morrigan still couldn't register what had happened. She was now on her way to the kitchen but as she walked she kept replaying what had happened in her head. Never in the years she has known Ambrosine did she ever see the girl break down crying. It was a pained sight she never wanted to see again.

Shaking her thoughts away Morrigan walked into the kitchen only to see everyone already there. They were about to eat breakfast which consisted of eggs, rice and bacon. Aeris who was about to sit down quickly went to the stove and made a bowl telling Morrigan to sit so she could eat. Grabbing a chair Morrigan sat next to Yuffie who was staring at her bowl with hungry eyes. As she looked across the table she saw Riku but he didn't seem to be in the kitchen in mind since it was obviously elsewhere.

"Will Ambrosine be joining us or no?"

At the sound of Ambrosine's name, Riku looked up from his daze and glanced at Morrigan awaiting an answer.

"Um… yea she'll be here in a few."

As if on cue, Ambrosine walked through the entrance of the kitchen only to stop in mid-step as everyone stared at her. Aeris, who already had a bowl for her, smiled as she told Ambrosine to sit and eat her breakfast. Ambrosine did as she was told and took a seat next to Riku and Squall.

"So, um… What happened back there with Larxene?" Aeris casually asked as she took a bite of her rice with her chopsticks.

"I was just shocked over the hug. It's still uncomfortable to receive hugs from people. How about you Yuffie? Are you feeling better with people touching you?"

"I'm better then I was before. I probably would have done the same thing to Larxene though if she hugged me. The way she looks at me is enough to make me wanna smack her."

Aeris and Morrigan nodded in agreement before laughing at the sight of Yuffie smacking Larxene. Morrigan's laughing was cut short though when she saw Ambrosine playing with her food obviously trying to figure out a way to tell the group her news.

"So what did the Fairy Godmother want?" Riku asked as he took a bite of his breakfast.

"Nothing. She just came to see how I was doing. She gave me some medicine to give to Yuffie in case she was still having bad dreams. I left them in your room Yuffie ok?"

Yuffie nodded as she stuffed rice into her mouth. She ate as though it was her first time eating. Then again she didn't really eat after she was raped but it seemed as though her appetite was back. Ambrosine smiled at the girl but that smile faded when she was kicked in the shin by Morrigan's foot. Ambrosine kicked her right back telling the auburn haired girl to drop what she was thinking.

When everyone was finished eating, they washed their bowls before putting the back up. They all thanked Aeris for her breakfast before heading out in their own directions.

Ambrosine walked into her room closing the door behind her and sat on her bed debating on what to do. She wanted to tell the gang her news but she was afraid of what their reaction might be. Glancing over to her side table she saw her solution to her problem.

♣ ♣

"Axel!"

Axel was walking down the stairs of the Entrance Hall when he heard his name called by a feminine voice. Turning around he saw that the voice belonged to Ambrosine who was at the head of the stairs looking down at him. She quickly walked down the stairs to meet him and looked him straight in the eye.

"Hey Ambrosine. What do ya need?"

"Were you with your friends about a month ago?"

"What?"

"Just answer the question. Were you or were you not with your friends about a month ago?"

"No I was doing some business in Twilight Town. I came back yesterday only to find out we were coming here today."

"So that's why Larxene left your name out…" Ambrosine whispered to herself looking away from his gaze.

Looking at Axel again she nodded before running upstairs and coming down with two suitcases. Axel gave her a strange look as she walked past him to the doors and attempted to push them open with her luggage in her hand. Seeing this Axel helped her open the door receiving a thank you from the girl as she walked down toward the stop that would take her to the Rising Falls.

"AMBROSINE!"

Turning around Axel saw Morrigan running down the stairs with her own suitcases. Stepping aside, he let her walk through the doors so she could get through.

"Could you be any louder?"

"Yes I could. Wanna see?"

"Do it and I swear-"

"What? You'll smack me? You already know I'd smack you right back. You're lucky I'm even coming with you."

"I didn't ask you to. You invited yourself so don't try to threaten me with the best friend might leave thing. I can do well on my own."

"Oh shut up and let's make our way to the Gummi ship."

Axel watched the argument between the two girls and shook his head. Walking out of the castle he closed the doors behind himself and ran over to the girls.

"What the hell are you two doing?"

Ambrosine turned her head slightly to look at Axel before looking at Morrigan.

"We're doing nothing. What you are seeing is an illusion. Now go back into the castle and act as if this never happened."

"She's running away from her problems and I'm going with her to keep her ass in check and make sure she takes care of herself."

"I can't run from my problem. It's with me. It's inside me, remember? And by the way I can take care of myself. Thanks."

The lift stop finally arrived and the two girls were about to step onto it when Axel spoke.

"What are you running from? Or trying to avoid?"

"Riku." The two girls said in unison.

"Can I ask why?"

"You can ask but you won't get an answer. I'm sorry Axel but we really need to go." Ambrosine said getting on the platform.

"Do you wanna join us Axel?"

Ambrosine glared at Morrigan as she asked the question. Yes Axel was a friend but she didn't trust him on account of it was his buddies that raped her. How did she know he wouldn't contact them so they could take her baby and raise it to be something horrible like them?

"Morrigan, no. It was his friends that did it. No offence Axel but I don't think I could trust you even though you weren't there."

"I don't know what happened but I can keep them off your tail."

Morrigan looked at Ambrosine who rolled her eyes and agreed.

"But I swear if they are even in the same world as me, I'm going to kill you. Understand Axel?"

Axel agreed and helped Morrigan onto the platform before getting on himself. When they reached the platform below the made their way to the Rising Falls then to the Gummi ship. Axel boarded their luggage as Morrigan started up the Gummi. Ambrosine turned around to look at the castle she once called home and was surprised to feel a tear fall onto her hand. She was crying… Wiping her eyes she thought about Riku. About the first time they met, their first kiss and touched her lips feeling his touch there. She was doing the right thing. They would never let her have the baby if she stayed. She had to do this for herself and Riku. But if it was the right thing why did she feel so…empty?

"Ambrosine? Are we going?"

Turning back to the Gummi entrance she saw Morrigan and nodded. Looking back at her former home she waved goodbye before running into the Gummi closing the door behind her. Morrigan saw her tears and hugged her friend telling her everything was going to be fine. Axel, seeing that both girls were a little emotional, told them to buckle up as he walked to the driver's seat and buckled up himself. Making sure everything was ok, he looked back at Ambrosine and Morrigan before looking ahead and blasting off into space to an unknown world.

♣ ♣

Riku walked over to Ambrosine's room and knocked on her door. He wanted to know what she was going to tell him before the Fairy Godmother arrived. Seeing that she didn't answer the door or that he didn't hear her voice, he opened the door and stepped inside looking for her. He checked her bathroom but seeing that she wasn't there, he was about to walk out of her room when he noticed something on her bed.

Walking over to her bed he saw that it was a piece of paper folded in half that had caught his attention. As he got closer to the paper, he saw his name handwritten by Ambrosine. Picking up the paper, he unfolded it and read what it contained.

Dear Riku,

I don't know how to start off this letter. I don't know where to begin at all. Well I guess I could begin with when Fairy Godmother arrived. You see I asked her to come over here for a very important reason. I thought I was pregnant and asked her to make sure and sure enough… I'm pregnant. Now before you stop reading this and start looking for me I want to tell you that by the time you read this letter I will be off to the unknown.

Gods that sounds horrible… I left. Where I'm going I have no clue whatsoever. The reason I left is because I don't think having the baby there would be all that great. Also I don't think you and the gang would agree to me having the baby. Whether I'm going to keep it when it's born is still unknown to me.

I'm sorry for leaving like this and I know I should have said goodbye but I could never say goodbye to you. You're my light. Crap I'm crying now… Okay… I know I never told you this but I love you. Yes I, Ambrosine Callisto, am in love with you Riku Amuro. That is part of the reason I left as well. I don't want you to see me give birth to another person's baby. I'm afraid of what you'll see when it's born so it's best I do this. Reading over that sentence it seems as though I'm saying that to reassure not only you but myself.

I hope you don't hate me but I can understand if you do. It's cowardly what I'm doing but I think its for the best. (Again trying to reassure myself.) I love you my aqua blue-green eyed angel. Don't forget me and I hope you will find it in yourself to forgive me if not now but later. Dammit I'm crying again… Give Sora, Aeris, Yuffie, Cloud and Squall my love. I'll miss you all but you most of all.

P.S. Morrigan is with me so don't worry about me being on my own. See ya around Riku.

Riku placed the paper down beside him and put his head in his hands. He wasn't surprised when he felt tears running down his cheeks. How could she tell him that in a letter? How could she tell him she loved him in a letter that would break his heart. Standing up he walked over to her window and looked down toward the Rising Falls. As he looked down he saw someone standing before the Rising Falls before turning around and disappearing. Knowing it was Ambrosine, he ran out of the room as fast as he could and went down the lift stops until he reached the entrance of the castle. He had to tell Ambrosine everything would be fine. She could have her baby and if she wanted to keep it, they could have a family. He wasn't going to stop her from having the baby. She could have it in Hollow Bastion where she'd be surrounded by loved ones.

Taking the platform down to the Rising Falls he hoped that Ambrosine was still there and that he wasn't too late. He hoped she was delaying but all his hopes were crushed when he ran into the Gummi Garage only to see her Gummi take off. Falling to his knees he called out her name with all his might but it was too late. She was gone and he could go after her but they were too far now.

After regaining himself, Riku stood up and started walking back to the castle only to stop and turn around to where Ambrosine's Gummi once was.

"I love you too Ambrosine…"

With that he continued walking back with only one thing flowing through his head- Why?

The End

:sees readers with torches and knives:

I know, I know. I made you guys wait all this time only to write a long chapter which resulted in the end of the story. This story was my baby… Please don't kill me! I felt that this needed to end so I ended it, but don't worry I am working on a sequel. I hope you enjoyed reading this story and I hope to have the sequel up hopefully before the year is over.

I would like to thank the reviewers for reading this and I wanna thank the people who read this but didn't write a review. (Darn you!)

Also Phoenix Archangel I'd like to thank you for the idea of Ambrosine's outfit since I 'stole' it. :P See ya when school starts babe. GO JUNIORS:P

Anyways the sequel will be called 'Starting Over' or at least that is what I have in mind for now. Hope to see you all soon and… Please don't hurt me!