Author's Note: Completely off the wall, but I just had to write it.
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"May I come in?"
"Come in." Jareth put down his book and stifled a sigh. He wasn't in the mood for another serious discussion. All he wanted to do was read about someone he didn't care for going through a sufficiently amusing amount of trouble and then he wanted to go to sleep.
Toby came in and shut the door, just looking at him.
Jareth was prepared for anything. He was even prepared for his ward to burst into tears and start proclaiming his love for Luka. Only, Toby didn't look as if he was particularly distraught. He looked a little drained, a little pensive, but even as the clocks ticked down the seconds those blue eyes seemed to grow brighter.
"I spoke to Luka," Toby finally began, "He is willing to talk. He says he will tell you anything you want to know. And he says that you are a bastard and he hates you with all the passion of his soul."
"Good to know." The Goblin King reluctantly discarded his book and got out of bed. "Well, if he is in the mood to talk I suppose I should go and… why are you mooing at me?"
Toby bit his lip but couldn't hide the smile as he stopped 'mooing' and moved Jareth back to the bed. "Tomorrow," he allowed, "You can talk to him tomorrow. He is hardly going to run away."
"Yes, but I will get more out of him now. Let me go, you insane man!"
Toby pushed hard and smiled sweetly when the fae glared up at him. "Tomorrow," he repeated, "You can talk to him in the morning. For now, you need to sleep. I demand that you rest."
"You demand? What gives you the right to…"
Toby cut in fairly easily. "Call it brotherly concern."
"Good God!"
"I thought the Underground didn't believe in God?"
"Humanity is catching," Jareth snapped. He sat up and tilted his chin, trying to read those perfectly open blue eyes. He wasn't really interested in Luka at the moment and Toby gave him the excuse to put it off for a while. He really was more interested in his bed. "Is that all?"
"Well, all of what concerns Luka, yes. Lie down. Have you eaten?"
"Yes, mother."
"Hush! Lie down!"
Jareth raised an eyebrow but complied. Wondering just how pure Toby's intentions were and then congratulated himself when the mortal joined him. "I see you have other work for me to do," he commented dryly.
Toby looked as guileless as a child. "Not at all," he protested, "I wanted some company tonight. I just ended a relationship. I could cry." There was not a tear to be seen.
"Ah." Jareth nodded sagely, his own humour waking up. "I recommend mindless rutting."
"You always recommend mindless rutting. If I were dying you would recommend mindless rutting."
"Would you want to die without one last night of pleasure?"
"No. But do you not fear that I might- what was the term that Dr. Beck used- transfer my affections?"
"Transfer… what are you talking about?" Jareth was completely at sea. The Underground mostly called a spade a spade. While the Goblin King was more accomodatingthan most, even he had a hard time understanding why mortals excused anything on the grounds of psychological disorder. He personally believed that most of what was wrong with humans was refusing responsibility for their own actions.
Toby shrugged. He didn't understand very much of it either. But Dr. Beck had been a huge phenomenon amongst the younger adults of the Underground because of his magnanimous dispensation of psychological verse to all and sundry. It was like fortune-telling, but more exotic. "Something to do with healing your hurt from one relationship by falling headfirst into another."
Jareth snorted. "It is called desperation," he said plainly, "When a person cannot have the cookie in the jar on the top shelf, he settles for the crumbs left on the plate on the table."
"Humans are a curious breed," Toby nodded.
"You are human."
"Not really. I am human, but I act like any from the Underground. That makes me not-human."
"Inhuman, in fact," Jareth teased.
"Hah! Jest if you must, but we both know who the most empathetic person is."
"Sympathetic, Toby, not empathetic. Empathy implies that you share another's emotions. You do not. You just feel sorry for someone else's plight."
"I feel sorry for you," Toby pointed out, "You were almost on the path to having very good sex tonight. But now I think I shall lie here and sulk."
Jareth chuckled and curled around him, all silken skin and hard bone.
Toby smiled when he began to feel the heat pour from the fae's skin to his own. He put his arms around the slender waist, tilting his head invitingly. It was still such a new thing, this attraction. True attraction, not like the resigned coupling of the previous months. He wanted Jareth, felt reasonably convinced that Jareth found something interesting in him. It was easy with Jareth. It didn't matter what they felt; in the bedroom, it was always a friendly romp that usually ended with a laugh.
It was strange, this, wriggling under Jareth as the fae alternated a mocking insult with a kiss. Laughing when Jareth began a monologue on the stupidity of mortals and how bad they usually were at seductions when the fae's nimble fingers tried to undress him without actually having the space to do so.
"Stop, stop," Toby begged, laughing so hard he got a stitch in his side, "Let go. You'll tear it." He scrambled around until he could get his shirt off. "There. Better?"
"Mmm… let me see." Jareth pressed up close and slithered. There was no other word for it. It was all just muscle stretching and twisting and contracting as he set limb to limb and hip to hip. The sizes were wrong, but he managed it somehow. "Much better," he complimented.
"Good. What about these?" Toby tugged at the waistband of the breeches Jareth hadn't bothered to take off. Most people wore loose, thin trousers to sleep in but not Jareth. Jareth either slept nude or couldn't be bothered undressing.
"I was going to leave them on."
"Oh no, you won't! I will have a lot to say about that!" Toby tugged harder. "Come on! Off or I shall tear them."
Jareth resisted and winked mischievously. "I have a better way. Shall we play a game?"
"A game? No! No games! I know you and you will find some way to make sure you win."
"I like winning."
"Good."
"And when I win I usually feel very magnanimous and happy. I also usually feel more open to being- what did you once call me- a whore? Yes, that."
Toby softened and twirled the lock of light blond hair in his fingers. "I never meant it," he murmured, "Not in the way it sounds."
"Forget and forgive. Besides, it was not quite an insult." Jareth grinned, knowing full well that Toby didn't believe him. But in all seriousness, what would be the point of protecting his virtue. It had vanished some many lovers ago! Jareth had heard worse said about his ways behind his back. "You look ashamed."
"I was rude. And I was stupid."
"I have always said so."
"Hey!"
"Horse."
Toby pinched a lean flank in revenge. "Evil, evil creature," he accused, "You are being deliberately provoking."
"Yes, but I am still waiting for a reaction. What are you thinking of? We're both half naked in bed and talking about sex and all you can do is offer platitudes about some fight we once had? You're worse than a female!"
Toby rolled, trapping the Goblin King beneath him and tilting his chin up. "A female, am I? I am not the one who spreads his legs at a moment's notice as ready payment," he growled, "Not a whore? A courtesan, perhaps- one who pays for his upkeep with his body?"
Lids flicked down coyly over mismatched eyes, sharp cheekbones staining red with a flush of anticipation. The deep voice was ragged at the edges, too soft and too breathy. Hot,capable hands let go and lay passively just above the light blond head. "I owe you no payment," Jareth commented.
"And I ask for none. Call it a shared pleasure." Toby let Jareth up and shrugged ruefully at the enquiring look. "I like to feel equal when sharing a bed. Power games are not a part of my enjoyment."
The Goblin King smirked and gathered himself into a crouched position. Then he pounced. Toby yelped in shock but the fae wouldn't cease. Long fingers dug into ribs and snuck around all those places on the human body that were said to be ticklish. Toby squirmed, true enough, and tried to get away as he choked on his laughter, but it wasn't until Jareth accidentally slid his fingers along the back of the mortal's left knee that Toby begged him to stop.
"Enough," the mortal gasped, struggling away, "Enough."
Jareth sat back and looked very pleased with himself. "You relented first," he boasted, "Therefore the breeches stay. As a sign of my magnanimous pleasure in winning the game, you may keep yours on as well."
"Thank you," Toby said dryly, "You are indeed merciful, Your Majesty."
"Ah-ah-ah! Equals in this bed, Toby. Out of it, of course, I demand the proper respect as your guardian and King. And elder brother too, now I think of it."
"Good God!"
"I thought the Underground did not believe in God?"
Toby whacked the fae between the shoulder blades. "I am not yet one of you lot," he sniffed, "Keep this up and I might even decide never to be."
"How will we survive. Well, brat? Am I to infer that you really will take citizenship?" Jareth propped himself up against the headboard and folded his arms comfortably. "It is a forgone conclusion with the adoption, you know. There will be a lot of outcry if the law permits a non-converting human to profit from the death of one of the Underground. I would be called on to send you back where you belong. Truthfully speaking, humans belong up there unless they are given to me."
"The Lady said that I cannot be forced to convert. Why is that? Vinni never did explain."
"You chose, Toby. I was given no power over you because you kept it by making your own decisions. Everyone else that I bring down here is sent by someone else that has power over them. That power is transferred to me and as I cannot have a bunch of humans running wild in the Underground, they convert to one of the Underground races. They have no choice in that either because I make the decision for them, using the power that I was given. I let them choose what they will become. No point turning someone into an elf if they have no natural aptitude for it. But as I said, I cannot force you."
"I am presuming not many people wish themselves away very often."
"None in my time. None for King Hayle either."
"Why not?"
"For one thing, I cannot answer any wish from the Aboveground unless it directly calls upon me or the goblins. As I am their absolute monarch, I own the wretched little things. Anything wished to them comes first to me. For another, not many humans really believe in the Underground. There must be a certain amount of belief for the wish to penetrate the barriers between the worlds. How else am I to hear it?"
Toby nodded slowly and absorbed it all. Most of this he knew, but asking Jareth directly made it seem a lot more real. At any moment, a human from the Aboveground would call and ask that he take someone they did not want. And like Sarah, they would either want him or her back, or like that nasty little brat from two years ago, they would be very happy to be rid of whoever it was. Tragic, but then immature people were selfish like that.
"Is this really why you came to my room at this time of night?"
"Would you prefer I left?" Toby asked seriously.
Jareth shrugged. "I was hoping to get some sleep," he admitted, "Or at least, some rest."
"Ah. I should leave then."
Jareth watched him get up and pick up the shirt. Toby didn't look very unhappy about being asked delicately to leave. But Jareth was no longer in the mood to read that book again before he fell asleep. He was restless, and he was morose. What he needed, he realized, was a good laugh.
Toby barely opened the door when Jareth grabbed him by the arm and tugged him after him, grinning like a devil with an obvious plan dawning in that busy brain of him. "Do you remember that first night?" Jareth tossed over his shoulder, moving swiftly up the stairs, "The bath?"
"Yeah. Why?"
"Hurry, hurry! Someone might see."
Toby raised an eyebrow but continued without question. Jareth's excitement was infectious and the mad part of his mind couldn't help but wonder gleefully what reckless scheme his guardian had come up with. It didn't take long before he realized that Jareth was taking him up to the suite they had shared so painfully before. The doors were both firmly shut, but Jareth strode into the library and snatched up a stack of paper from the desk before slipping lightly out again. "Bathroom," he said shortly.
Toby was now bewildered. The suite he could understand. Jareth kept bringing him there for privacy since no one else would ever dare enter those rooms without the permission of the Goblin King. Jareth was never around to give his permission so they were safe for the most part. But privacy apart, why the bathroom? That was a puzzle. And why paper? What in all the possible worlds would Jareth want to play around with paper in a bathroom for?
He found out when a sheet was thrust into his hands and he was sternly told to make a boat. He stared at Jareth's perfectly serious face.
"Have you never made a paper boat before?" Jareth asked in astonishment, "Surely someone taught you!"
"Er… no, not really."
"Oh. Well, it is quite simple." Jareth swiftly ran through the various steps- chattering all the while- and then laughed out loud when Toby tried it.
There was something very weird about sitting on the cold tile of the bathroom, still not fully dressed, with a lively fae telling one how to make a paper boat. Jareth was at his animated best, laughing and talking and joking all in one breath. Very frequently, his fingers dived in between Toby's to stop the mortal making a mess, only to confuse everything up and make a thorough muddle. Then they would both laugh and the unfortunately torn or crumpled paper would be tossed aside and kept for another vague purpose. Toby even found himself relaxing enough to enjoy this juvenile activity.
"Dieter and I learned from Franja. For a whole six months, we left a trail of paper boats behind us everywhere we went," Jareth told him, "When we were finally forbidden from wasting any more paper, we resorted to using cloth, leaves and various other highly unsuitable materials. Here! That should be enough."
They looked proudly at the six boats sitting on the tile between them.
And then Jareth snapped back into action. "Three each," he commanded, "And now for the play."
The play? Toby opened his mouth to ask but thought better of it. He'd never seen his lover in such a mood. He'd never heard of his lover in such a mood! No one had ever mentioned Jareth sitting on the tile beside an enormous bathtub and preparing to play with paper boats. Nothing had ever- and Toby had been through a lot in the past nine months alone- hinted at that. Toby's only predicament was whether he wanted to play along. On the one hand, it wasn't something the adult side of him found very appealing. On the other, how many other times in his life had someone offered to sail paper boats in a tub with him? It would be an experience, to say the least.
"That is your navy," Jareth told him, jealously separating the two of them, "And this is mine. Name your troops!"
"What?" Toby was laughing before he even realized it.
"Believe me this is fun," Jareth assured him, laughing as well, "Go on. Think of a name."
"Kersel?" Toby suggested.
"You named your navy after a flower? What kind of navy is that?"
"Alright, alright." Toby remembered stories from the Aboveground dealing with pirates. And it gave him an idea. "May I change the story a little? Thank you. Now, you can be the King's Navy- all fair and aboveboard- and my boats will be a band of bloodthirsty pirates trying to get the treasure that you are transporting to another country. Say it is a shipment of precious stones for a trade of carrions."
"Why do I want creatures that eat the dead?" Jareth questioned.
"Because of your Labyrinth. You are going to turn them loose to frighten the challengers. And this," Toby set his first boat in the water, "Is the all-important battle between your ships and mine."
The Goblin King shrugged and nodded. "Agreed. But I have another suggestion. You can be the King's Navy and I want to be the Pirates."
"Why?"
"Call it a change of pace," Jareth teased, "Or do you think you haven't the wit for a Kingship?"
Toby popped the other two into the bath. "Have not the wit, have I? On your guard, you rogue traitor to crown and country! How dare you steal from your King?"
Had anyone else passed by the room they would have been startled to hear peals of laughter from the open doors of the suite at such an unsuitable hour of the night. As it was, only Ezreeka heard it. She philosophically put the note she had been instructed to deliver back into her pocket and went away very quietly. There was little enough laughter as it was in the Castle that night. As an elf, she could not say she wanted the happiness gone from the stone walls.
She went back the next morning to find Toby had left and Jareth peacefully asleep in the bed. There had been two, however, and the indented pillow bore the signs of an early departure. She slipped into the bathroom, not sure what she expected to see. She certainly had not expected to see soggy paper boats that had been sailed so long they had finally sunk in the bathtub, or a discarded shirt in the puddles on the tile. There was water everywhere, as if two people had been splashing happily around and then decided to throw it at each other when the friendly battle moved from boats to playful shoving.
Jareth left the next morning, as serious as he had ever been and as mature as was befitting his station. Ezreeka stifled the giggle at that twinkle in his eyes when she demurely told him she would clean up the mess in the bathroom.
