Author's Note: Sorry that it's been so long, kids. Well, actually, it's only been three months, and I have stories that I've left for a far longer period of time than that. Of course, that's not the point. Well, I'm back for now, and school will be ending in a few weeks. I can't believe that it's been almost a year since I started this epic. ((Sigh)). Thanks to Julie (trip hazard) for all her help. Enjoy!
"Roger," Mark began. His voice had already begun to tremble; this wasn't something that he wanted to know. This was something that he needed to know. However, this was something that Roger might not be able to talk about.
The other boy bowed his head, letting his chin slip into the hollow of his throat. He didn't look scared, but Mark knew that he was. His eyes were darting in every direction, not unlike they had the day after they'd met. Hesitantly, Mark extended his hand towards Roger's shoulder.
"Roger..."
Roger flinched as Mark touched him.
"Roger, please. Look, I know that you don't really want to talk about it, but you h-"
"My dad died when I was twelve." Roger's voice was calm. "Annie was a baby, you know? And Adam wasn't that old either. He had cancer, my dad. None of us really understood. Mom just said that he had gone on a trip when he was in the hospital. I didn't even get to say goodbye."
He paused, letting his eyes settle on Mark's. "So, you know, I had to be the man of the house. I wasn't ready for it, I guess. Adam was sort of lost for a while, and Mom... I don't know what happened to her. She started working at the diner, and we never saw her. I just sort of took care of Annie and Adam; stopped going to school for a while. And then, she met him.
"He hated me right from the start. I mean, I wasn't exactly nice to him. He was sort of- well, no. He was replacing my dad. That's the only reason she married him. She wanted us to have a father. I guess the money was part of it too. We were living in the city at the time, and it's really hard to keep everything up there. That's why we moved here, I think. He lost, like, his fifth job since they got married because he showed up smashed. Mom was pregnant, so she wasn't working.
"That's when everything started to happen, I guess. He was pissed about losing his job, so he took it out on her. He started smacking her around a little bit; I didn't notice, I guess. I was so busy hating him- I- I..."
Roger trailed off again, shifting his gaze back to his hands. "He was too rough one night, and she lost the baby. She was at the clinic... Adam was at a friend's house, I was trying to do homework, I guess. I heard Annie crying- and... God, it was so- no, I don't... she was so scared, Mark. He was... touching her. I mean, she was two! Two-years-old and some bastard was..."
Mark bit his lip.
"I went to stop him. I just barged in there in the middle of it, and he was standing in front of my baby sister. She was screaming- I pushed him away from her. I just shoved him as hard as I could. It didn't do much.
"He broke my arm that night. He flew off the handle and started smacking me, and then he just kept twisting it, and twisting it. It wasn't like this time. This time I went in to stop him- I've spent the last two years doing that- and he was going to kill me. I swear to God, he would've. I don't know what made him stop."
His voice died, having steadily descended to a whisper through his story. He turned away from Mark, not wanting the other boy to see the angry tears that had collected in his eyes.
"I'm so-"
"Don't be sorry, Mark," Roger said pointedly. "It isn't going to change anything."
"But-"
"When Mom got back from the clinic, I was gone. I was in the hospital- but no one came to visit me. I was so scared. I didn't know what that son of a bitch was doing to her- there's nothing I could have done to stop it. Not from there. I don't even know if my mom knew what had happened. He came to get me, told me that he had told her that I had landed the wrong way when I was playing basketball or something. He said not to even bother with- he said he'd kill me. In a way, I guess he did. I didn't talk for months. I couldn't look at them, look either of them in the face. But I kept protecting Annie. If I knew something was going to happen, I'd take her into my room. Let her sleep with me for the night.
"When we moved here, I thought it was going to be different. Mom got a new job, and Matthew took a swing shift at the plastic factory. He wasn't supposed to be home nights and I thought that it would be okay.
"It hasn't been, so far. He's broken that arm again, and gone after the other one; my jaw... Annie doesn't know. She doesn't understand, Mark. She really doesn't. I mean, she came in here and tried to 'kiss it and make it better.' She knows that what Matthew's doing is bad, and that if she calls, I'll stop him. I always get her back to her room before he goes off. I don't want her to see me- to see him... I just want her to think that I'm brave and that I'll always be there to save her. I don't want her to blame herself for anything. None of it's her fault. None of it."
Mark sucked in a nervous breath. "What about your mom? How can she not-"
"She's blind. Or scared. I mean, he doesn't go after her too much anymore. She's in love with the idea of being in love, and she hates herself. She doesn't think that she can find anyone better- and even if she could, if she told anyone about what Matthew does, she's scared he'll do worse. Like revenge or something. She doesn't blame herself or anything; she just can't see what's really going on."
"But what does she tell people? I mean... you look better than you did, but they'll know when you get to school. They'll know it wasn't an accident or some sort of... I don't know," Mark broke off, scared that he might be going too far.
"I won't go to school again until I start to look normal. That's what I've always done," Roger answered matter-of-factly. "Look, Mark, you don't have to feel like you're asking too much. I've never talked about this with anyone, and it sort of feels good to let it all out. But, I guess, I don't want to burden you with all this crap either."
"No, just... talk all you want," Mark replied cautiously. "I'll listen."
"I don't know how much else there is to say. I mean, I could be a lot worse off. I could be dead, and then there'd be no one there to protect her- them. Oh... oh my God. Adam's there. Alone. What if Matthew's tried something? No, this can't happen. He's too little; he couldn't do anything. Matthew'd kill him. Mark, I can't stay at my grandpa's house. There's too much that can go wrong."
"You have to. You said that your mom doesn't want you at the house."
"But-" Roger began. He stopped, letting his head fall. "This is really bad."
Their conversation was interrupted by a soft knock on the door. Muriel walked in, a Tupperware container with Jell-O in tow.
"I'm sorry, boys. Visiting hours are up for the day, and the doctor is making rounds with some of the med students. Y'all better wrap it up, or Mark won't have any Jell-O to take home in the future."
Mark was about to protest, but Roger pasted on a plastic smile. "Sure, Muriel. Look, uh, Mark... I left some stuff at my house. My... baseball cards! Yeah. Could you bring them for me tomorrow?"
Mark grimaced. Roger was asking him to check up on things at home. He paused, wanting to refuse, but after everything Roger had just told him...
"Sure, Roger."
