I still don't own the rights to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. (However, I just bought the book from my school bookshop with a $5 voucher and 20 percent off discount, which added up to me paying exactly only half-price for it.)
In keeping with the time-honoured H2G2 tradition of none of its incarnations being loyal to each other, this poem will not always follow canon exactly.
So here goes...
The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Poem: Bit the Fourth
A crashing sound approached the pub, and Arthur got a fright
Glancing out the window, he sensed something was not right.
"What was that?" "Your house, I guess," said Ford with extreme calm
The words sank in, and Arthur whacked his forehead with his palm.
"Ford, what am I doing here?" "You're drinking beer." "I see."
Dent ran out of the pub's front door, hands waving frantic'ly.
Ford bought some peanuts.
Then he went after his friend.
Hitchhiker's haiku. ;P
Dent stumbled madly through the grass, up to the hill where lay
Remains of Arthur's house, which had been bulldozed down that day.
"PROSSER!" Arthur yelled, "I swear I'll murder you for this!
"And chop you into tiny bits and dunk them in my piss!
"And all the rest of you as well! I'll... hit you... very hard...
"And dice you into little cubes and JUMP on them! ...Oh, crud."
A shadow fell, and it could not quite get back up again
Thus darkening the landscape of that peaceful English plain
"What the -beep- is that?" he hollered, pointing at the sky
Staring at huge yellow things that screamed real loudly by.
Around the world the people ran about the place in panic
Dashing into homes and out again with motions frantic
Screaming at the sky and at the ground and at the air
Then running off real fast to do it all again elsewhere.
Their actions, though, were pointless, for they wouldn't help one bit
There's no escaping mankind's fate when Planet Earth gets hit
By the ruthless force of bulldozers, sent down from outer space
And it's really sad, the way I keep on rhyming 'space' with 'race'.
To be continued.
To killer zombie girl (Okay, I did), Deranged Lunatic (Thanks! ;P Wish DNA were still here... he used to read fanfic), HyperCaz (thanks for reviewing!), Demus (all right, more here!), nevermore wish (boycott Harry Potter fanfics? Why? Not that I read them much...) and Faceplant 02 (Heheh. Nice idea for that line.), thanks for reviewing!
