A/N: hey thanks for all the reviews everyone! Okay, before you read this chapter I would just like to say that Lupus is a real disease, but that even though before I did this chapter I read about the disease I'm not sure if everything I have down is exactly factual. In fact if any of you know what lupus and could tell me if I left anything out or if I put something up that's not true or something it would be nice if you could let me know. ;)

I hope you enjoy this chapter:) And once again thanks for the reviews!

:Chapter 14:

Landon led Julia down into the basement of the hospital, a place she had never been before. Wrapping her arms around herself she tried to take her mind off the news she would soon be hearing about Nick. She eyed the long dimmed hallways that passed room after room, office after office, feeling more like she was in a prison as she carried on.

Landon said nothing as he took her to his office, not even sure how he was to break the news to her at all. Julia was only growing annoyed by the silence.

"Alright, I'm sure you have a lot of questions about Nick," Landon stated the obvious as he sat in his office chair, pointing to his daughter to take a seat in the only other chair that could fit in the tiny room that was a pathetic excuse for an office.

"No shit," Julia said icily, watching her father intently. She was growing nervous by the second, was Nick dying? Was she destined to relive her father's trauma by falling love with someone who had cancer and was going to die young? She closed her mind toward the thought and by ignoring the look of hurt in her father's eyes, waiting as patiently as she could.

"Okay," Landon finally began, "Let's start with the basics. He has systemic lupus erythematosus, but it's really called lupus for short. It's an autoimmune disease that may affect many of his organs. Today it just happened to be his lungs," Landon sighed heavily, "something that he has been having trouble with."

A long silence filled the air, while Julia let it sink in. A disease? She thought desperately, its not cancer then? He's not going to die? The words were suddenly forming on her lips and said, "Not cancer?"

Landon twitched from the question, only to leave Julia suddenly feeling uncertain about it. "It's a deadly disease," he replied slowly, calmly—too calmly. "His life is definitely not going to be as long as the average life span." Julia shook her head slowly, her eyes wide with fear; Tearless, fearful.

Julia wanted desperately to ask whether or not Nick could die soon, but she couldn't even handle the possibility of hearing her father say yes. She let her father continue. "Lupus primarily affects the immune system and makes it hard for the patients to live completely normal lives—but it's not impossible." Landon took in a deep breath. He had never had to have one of these conferences with his daughter before. It was hard.

"Normal? Dad he has a disease!" Julia spat. Why she was feeling all her of anger lash at her father she didn't know.

"Well, although Lupus is quite deadly as long as you keep up with it and aren't too strenuous on yourself most patients live until there at most thirty." He paused a moment before adding, "Julia, to be honest, with Nick I don't know if living to even as old as thirty is even possible."

The heart pounding thump in her chest seemed to have frozen within that instant, she wasn't even sure if she was still drawing breath. What did that mean?

"His lungs seem to be where his body is attacking. If he gets too worked up over stress or something as simple as running or walking to fast, he has problems with breathing and his lungs," Landon kept on talking, his voice detached, too calm, too steady. His eyes that glanced at her from time to time were emotionless, blank.

Julia began to wonder how many of these conferences he has had before. Suddenly knowing a portion of what it must feel like sitting and hearing about a loved one having cancer and only living for a short amount of time. Only, Julia didn't know how long Nick's life was too be savored. She didn't want to know.

Landon ranted on and on, telling her more about the disease and how Nick was slowly, steadily getting better until today. Today was one of the worst Julia had ever lived through. And now, not only was she showered with guilt, pity, and carebut fear.

"Dad, I need to go," she mumbled right in the middle of her father's sentence, "Nick needs me."

She pushed back her chair and rushed out of the room before Landon could stop her. Salty tears stained her face as she ran back down the narrow hallway, seeing the vacant operating rooms and offices looming back at her, gaping nothingness. Emptiness. She strained to keep her eyes from drifting toward the rooms as she ran toward the elevator.

"Nick," she breathed when she took up the only chair seating next to him. He didn't respond at all, with only the machine next to him that gurgled out signs of life. From the lively flowers and cards on his bed side table she knew his parents had come in to see their son, of course not the first time they found him hooked to a machine and IV. Julia eyed what was next to him and couldn't help but let herself scan over a trophy.

It was made of gold with the picture of a runner carved into it. The runner was frozen in the trophy, as if someone had pushed the pause button. She knew that must have been how Nick felt when he looked at it and knew he couldn't run anymore. That his dream and joy of feeling the wind brush across his face as he ran, was over. Julia let her mind drift off toward the conversation she had over heard from her father talking to Mrs. Brookes. Nick must have really enjoyed running…

She reached out and let her fingers glide against the trophy, outlining it carefully letting her fingers trace the runner. Then she leaned over and read the engravings of the trophy.

This first place metal trophy is presented to:

Nick Brookes a dedicated and talented runner

"Julia," a short rasped whisper filled the air. Her eyes immediately feel on Nick, but he looked just as lifeless as he had when she first laid eyes on him. The only slight change was his eyes were open just enough to make out her figure, but then they closed again.

"I'm here," she choked, gently resting her hand on his.

"I'm sorry," he rasped out again, she wanted to cry hearing how different his voice sounded now. Barely even making it above a whisper. "I—I shouldn't have brought—brought you into this."

Julia didn't know what to say. Her mouth became dry and her lips would not shape any of the words she wanted to say—she wished she could say. A silence drifted between them, either bringing them closer or farther apart, Julia couldn't tell. All she knew was Nick was sitting stiller over the next few minutes. No more words were said.

Eventually the tears she fought to keep from slipping past her eyes came despite her desperate tries, and for the first time in years she felt her true feelings coming together. It was as if things suddenly made sense in a world of confusion. Her eyes fell on Nick and she remembered the night they had shared together.

It was so perfect, with the setting and the fireflies and—and the kiss. Yet, it was the connection between them that Julia could never forget. They had shared something special that night, something deep and – almost sacred. Julia then did something she had never thought she would ever do outside of church.

She slowly dropped herself down onto her knees, bowed her head and prayed. It was the strangest place to be praying, yet she did. She even found herself bawling to the openness that was supposed to be God listening. She mumbled prayer after prayer and at one point or another reached up and took Nick's hand as she prayed.

"Julia," Nicked rasped out, but this time his voice sounding a little more like his own. She immediately looked up and found him propped up on the hospital pillows, his eyes more aware and open. The joy of seeing him full of more life and awareness brought tears to her eyes. Without warning and with no words spoken, she reached up and pulled him into her arms. Tears leaking freely down her face. "Ju—Julia?"

"Oh God," Julia breathed gripping her arms around him so tightly she was sure she could never let him go. Eventually she felt Nick's arms form around her and hold her tightly, obviously unsure of the situation but not entirely ready to give it up. "You're alright! I thought you were going to die, Nick. I thought you were going to die." Her tears suddenly came out in shuddered sobs as she clung to him, holding him as if he she feared by letting him go he would dissipate back into his lifeless figure.

"Hey—hey," Nick muttered in sudden realization, she could have sworn he held her tightly within that moment. "Who told you I could die?"

Julia finally pulled away from his arms catching his gaze immediately, detecting both shock and fear—and comfort. "My Dad," she whispered, a knot in her throat causing her to slightly choke on her words.

"Dr. Carter?" Nick shook his head in disbelief but not exactly as confident as he wished he could be. He trusted his doctor, but why wouldn't Dr. carter tell him he was dying? "He—he said I could die?"

Julia looked away uncertainly, suddenly very confused over the situation. Was he dying? Or was her father just trying to prepare her for what may come? Suddenly she wasn't so sure. "Well," she whispered, "Everyone dies, Nick. I don't think my father meant you're time was coming."

The words were said and out before she even realized what she had said—as if someone sat and spoke for her; someonesomeone who wanted her and Nick to hear those words. "Nick," she whispered hesitantly, "God is here."