Disclaimer- If I did own the rights to Yugioh, I would be filthy stinkin' rich and I wouldn't waste my time writing a fanfic for my own story, which technically would not be a fanfic it would be fact. Hope I've made that clear.


Don't Say Such Things!

Yugi- Uh, guys? Weren't we just in six flags?

All-(blank stares)

Yugi- Never mind.

Joey- (looking at random map of Africa on the wall, starts laughing hysterically)

Qi- What the hell is so funny?

Joey- Nigger!

All- (have horrified looks on their faces)

Joey- What? Don't ya get it? There's a river in AFRICA called NIGGER! Its funny cuz black people are called niggers and there's a river-

Yugi- We get it!

Bakura- Holy shit, man are you trying to get us all killed!

Yugi- Yea, Joey you can't say that word!

Yami- It's pronounced Niger not Nigger!

Qi- My God! Whenever someone that's not black or Hispanic says that word its like standing in the middle of Compton and saying well…that word!

Ryou- Well, maybe that is where that term came from…

Yugi- What?

Ryou- Well, maybe some white person pronounced it wrong and used it as a derogatory term against African American people.

Yugi- Yea but still! Don't say it it's wrong!

Ryou- Two rights don't make a wrong.

Yugi- Wait is that the saying, isn't it a right doesn't make a wrong…or does it?

Qi- Three rights make a left!

Yami- I believe the saying goes, a wrong doesn't make a right.

Bakura- You should know Pharaoh! You probably used that lame ass line in one of your many sermons!

Qi- Please let's not start!

(Tupac busts down down)

Tupac- Sup foos' Which one of yall crakas used da word nigga? (pulls out gun)

All-(point to Tea who had just conveniently walked into the room)

Tea-Oh! A new friend to add to my arsenal of friends! FRIEND!

Tupac- (guns Tea down) Now I don wanna hear none of yalls usin' that word eva again, ya mean?

Qi- I thought you were dead…

Tupac-(eyes darting around the room, runs out)

(Not 2 seconds later Snoop Dogg swaggers into the room completely pimped out in, a pink fur coat, a white suit, a shit load of bling, a pimp cup, a pimp cane, pink sunglasses, giant pink feather hat, and to top it all off two hoes on leashes trailing behind him surrounded by an odd smelling smoke…)

Snoop Dogg- Yo, what up my shizzle fo rizzle, who da uizzle dizzle wizzle nizzle in dis

hizzle fo shizzle drizzle pizzle?

Tristen- Nah, my sizzle, wizzle dizzle drizzle, gizzle, me do double gizzle, it's of the hizzle for shizzle! My apologizzles.

Snoop Dogg- Pizzle my nizzle.

Tristen- Kizzle. (does the hand shake thingie with snoop dogg)

All-(have looks in various stages of shock, awe, and udder disbelief)

Tristen- What? I just explained to him that, yes one of my companions used that derogatory term, but it was said in complete ignorance of its true meaning and I will see to it that it is not spoken again.

Qi- And I thought you needed more charcter development, you're a hard ass gangsta!

Tristen- (blushes) Ah, well, thank you.

(Awkward silence)

Joey- So, what now?

Qi- How do you think vampires shave?

Yami- What do you mean?

Qi- Well, think about it. They can't see their reflections, and I've never seen a vampire with a beard.

Yugi- Yea! How do they shave?

Ryou- Maybe they shave each other…

Joey- That sounds gay.

Qi- Thanks for your input.

Yami- Besides aren't vampires loners?

Yugi- Yea, but maybe vampires sire vampires just to shave them. Like they have their own personal shaver vampires.

Qi- Hey! Maybe there's a vampire barber shop out there somewhere!

Yami- Well, then maybe there's a vampire barber shop quartet.

Ryou- Why wouldn't there be?

Yeslek- Maybe they use some kind of special enchanted mirror or something.

Qi- Yea but not every vampire would have one.

Yami- I've never heard of an enchanted mirror vampires use to shave with…

Bakura- (finally putting his 2 cents in) Well, that wouldn't exactly be in the record books.

Qi- I've been trying to get every ones opinion on this.

Joey- Wait who the hell are you?

Yeslek- Oh, I'm Yeslek the magic talking staple gun. Alyek is my cousin.

Joey- Are you gonna yell at us for the content of this chapter?

Qi- Again this is why I rated this story M! But I was thinking of changing the rating to T.

Yeslek- Oh, no I just like to kill people.

Yami- oh…maybe we should take cover…

Yeslek- Oh yes, I would if I were you.

(all run in random directions while Yeslek shoots staples at an alarming speed at them all, Qi picks up Tea's body and blocks the staples with it.)

Yeslek- FEAR MY POINTY PROJECTILES! (runs out of staples) shit. (hops through the broken window and makes his escape.)

Tristen- I should have popped a cap in it's ass.

Qi- (throws Tea's staple filled bleeding body aside) Yea that would have helped.

(All turn the furniture back over from when they used then for protection, all take their seats in front of the miraculously unharmed television.)

Ryou-(turns on tv) What should we watch? Oh! BBC!

All- NO!

Ryou-(sighs in defeat, channels change to different stations, a ramen commercial comes on, hello kitty passes by, a few animes, a kimono fasion show, an ad for sushi, other Japanese clichés occur)

Bakura-What the hell is this I thought we were in America!

Qi- Well, we're in Japan now okay?

(all shrug and settle on watching MXC)


Narrator- What the hell was that all about? Is Tristen really a hard ass gangsta? Where are the stapler's coming from? How do vampires shave?

Please read and review! And I would like to hear your opinions on how vampires shave. Please submit a response and the debate will continue!