well, here's chapter three finally after such a long time. I don't recall how long it's been since I've updated this 'Xiaolin Showdown' story of mine, but I can say this; I just now got back from my vacation. I have had no access to my word documents and as such, haven't been able to either work on or submit my writings onto this website.

anyway, this third chapter is a good ole' one-thousand-nine-hundred-sixty-six words long; that of which doesn't include this or the previous headnote just up above. it also doesn't include the disclaimer which makes up the following paragraph after this one. this 'Xiaolin Showdown' AU is loosely based upon the movie directed by 'The Devil Wears Prada's' own Anne Fletcher and written by Aline Brosh McKenna, '27 Dresses'. the movie was about a woman named Jane Nicholas who was just the most perfectly behaved bridesmaid until her younger sister and the man she loved started going out with one another.

disclamation: I don't own either 'Xiaolin Showdown' or its trashy reboot series that is 'Xiaolin Chronicles'. I also don't own '27 Dresses', not even on Blu-ray or DVD. 'Xiaolin Showdown' and 'Xiaolin Chronicles' are owned fully by Christy Hui. '27 Dresses' is owned exclusively by Anne Fletcher and is written solely by Aline Brosh McKenna.


Just before she could fully black out, Kimiko felt her head get lifted back up off of the hardwood floor at the church in which the wedding of her friend, Jessie's, elder brother, Clay had happened. Not only that, but her head was also lifted up just slightly by some well-tanned man who was also really quite handsome at that. At the very least, he was pretty handsome when she finally found her focus once again from having her head within the stranger's hands. She could even just hear someone talking about her, or rather asking about her.

Person asking about Kimiko Tohomiko: Is she alright?

Then, two other bridesmaids came to check on Kimiko along with the well-tanned man who was giving the Japanese girl a quick once-over. She only held onto her head as she tried to gain control back over her own senses. The well-tanned, handsome young man tried to get Kimiko to stay still until she could at the very least stand by herself once again.

Well-tanned, handsome young man: Whoa, whoa, whoa! Easy! Just take it easy. You don't wanna move around too much.

The well-tanned and incredulously handsome young man then looked from the beautiful porcelain-skinned young woman whose head he held up with his own hands to the women surrounding the both of them.

Well-tanned, handsome young man (continued): OK. This is a serious injury. I need you to get me some ice.

The well-tanned and handsome young man first pointed to the additional bridesmaid to his left and then to the other two bridesmaids who were also hovering over him.

Well-tanned, handsome young man (continued): You, give me a bottle of a hundred-proof liquor and something she can bite on.

Then the well-tanned and ridiculously handsome young man snapped his fingers at the other two bridesmaids.

Well-tanned, handsome young man (continued): Stat!

The well-tanned and incredibly handsome young man then looked back at Kimiko before responding further to her condition.

Well-tanned, handsome young man (continued): All right. She's fine, folks. Just a little bump on the head. Carry on.

When the well-tanned and enticingly handsome young man finally had the decency to help her up from off of the floor, Kimiko finally began talking to him. The first thing she said to him was in the form of a question, though.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Are you a doctor?

Well-tanned, handsome young man: No, but Tweedledee, Tweedledum and 'Tweedledrunk' were bugging me, so_

The well-tanned and incredibly handsome young man just chuckled a bit.

Well-tanned, handsome young man (continued): OK. Do you know your name?

Kimiko Tohomiko: It's Kimiko. Kimiko Tohomiko.

Well-tanned, handsome young man: Kimiko Tohomiko. I'm Raimundo, but my friends often call me 'Rai'.

While the well-tanned and unbelievably handsome young man, this Raimundo, had helped her, it was surprisingly, yet painfully clear to Kimiko that he had wanted to do a little more with her than just helping her.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Thank you for helping me.

Then, Kimiko tried to get up on her own.

Raimundo: Sure. Got it?

Kimiko Tohomiko: Uh-huh.

The well-tanned and undeniably handsome young man who had gone to her friend, Jessie's, elder brother, Clay's, wedding under the name of Raimundo seemed as though he had still wanted to make sure that Kimiko actually could get up on her own.

Raimundo: OK. You're good?

Kimiko Tohomiko: I'm fine.

Raimundo: All right.

Then, however, Kimiko began to topple over like she was about to faint. It was then that Raimundo had instantly realized that the girl within his arms had to have had a concussion or something.

Raimundo (continued): Whoa, whoa, whoa! OK! Why don't we get you a cab?

Then, Raimundo began ushering Kimiko out of the church.

Raimundo (continued): All right. Nice and easy. Let's walk.

Not surprisingly, the way back to Kimiko's home in Orlando was driven from within Jack's taxi cab. It was a little quiet for a cab drive shared between two people, though. It was quiet until Raimundo made a comment to Kimiko about when she was changing outfits from within the same cab earlier that exact evening.

Raimundo: I loved your thong, by the way.

That one little comment from Raimundo was just enough for Kimiko to grow weary of him.

Raimundo (continued): You buzzed past me, earlier. I saw you changing between a gown and a yukata. They both resembled bridesmaids' dresses, though. You were in two weddings in one night, weren't you? It sounds a little upsetting, don't you think?

Of course, Kimiko, herself, had a thing or two to say in defense for both of the weddings she attended that night.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Well, they're both really, really good friends of mine, and their weddings just happened to be on the same night, so what was I supposed to do?

Of course, the stranger in the cab with Kimiko, this Raimundo or whatever his name was, also had something to say about it.

Raimundo: Oh no, that's not the upsetting part. How do you stand it? I mean, isn't one wedding bad enough?

Kimiko had her own comeback to this stranger's comments about weddings.

Kimiko Tohomiko: I love weddings. I always have, ever since I was a little girl.

Raimundo: Really?

Kimiko Tohomiko: Yeah.

Raimundo: Which part? The forced merriment, the horrible music or the bad food?

Kimiko only chuckled at the cynicism of this total stranger in the cab ride with her, this Raimundo, before responding back to his question aimed at her.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Actually, it's meeting upbeat people like yourself.

Raimundo, however, came up with a mockery for this girl in the cab ride back to her home with him.

Raimundo: Love is patient. Love is kind. Love means slowly losing your mind.

Kimiko Tohomiko: What is it you do, again?

Raimundo: I'm a writer.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Right.

The two of them had finally made it back to Kimiko's house just in time for her to want to immediately part ways with both Jack and Raimundo for the rest of her life as the case had turned out to be.

Kimiko Tohomiko (continued): This is my place.

Raimundo had only wanted to spend all the more time with Kimiko under the guise of continuing to help her with the stuff she had gotten from both of the weddings of both her good friends, though.

Raimundo: I got it.

Kimiko, however, did not want the help of this cynic with whom she had been forced to share her cab ride back to her house.

Kimiko Tohomiko: No, I got it.

Raimundo: Ya sure?

Kimiko Tohomiko: Yeah.

Kimiko Tohomiko paid Jack the rate she had promised him for the night, along with all of the deductions she had promised him should he have looked at her in the rear-view mirror.

Kimiko Tohomiko (continued): All right, Jackie. One-hundred-forty bucks even. You know what you did.

Then just when Kimiko felt as though she could not have gotten anymore from the two in the car with her on her way back to her house, Raimundo grabbed onto the flowers she had gotten as gifts for her garden from the wedding of her friend, Jessie's, brother, Clay, to her other friend, Arlene wishing her well when she fell down onto the floor after the tossing of the bridal bouquet and tried to help her just so that he could spend more time with her. Kimiko would not have any of his help, however, especially not after he had reacted to her position in her friend, Arlene's, wedding so cynically. The young Japanese woman got out of the cab to follow the well-tanned and surprisingly handsome young man back to her house on the other side of the street from where the taxicab was stopped. Raimundo began speaking to Kimiko once again upon her getting out of the cab driven by Jack Spicer.

Raimundo: Don't you think it's a whole lot of ritual for something that, let's just face the facts, here, why don't we Kimiko? It's got about a mere fifty-fifty shot of making it outta the gate, both straight forward and safely?

Kimiko had finally made her way over to the other side of Jack's taxicab, the side at which Raimundo held onto her 'wishing you well' flowers from her friend, Arlene, and her other friend, Jessie's, elder brother, Clay's, wedding.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Oh, how very refreshing. A man who doesn't believe in marriage.

Kimiko then made a grab for the 'get well' flowers she had received from Arlene and her friend, Jessie's, brother, Clay, close to the end of their wedding from just before she had to leave with this well-tanned and surprisingly hunky, yet shockingly ill-mannered bozo named Raimundo. He had managed to pull the flowers further away from her just before she could grab them, though.

Raimundo: I'm just trying to point out the hypocrisy of the entire spectacle.

Kimiko, however, only saw that of which he was saying at the time as even nastier cynicism from Raimundo's end of their conversation.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Oh. That's so noble of you. Do you also go around telling small children that Santa Claus doesn't exist? Because someone really needs to blow that shit wide out into the open.

Kimiko then tried to make another grab for her flowers from Jessie Bailey's elder brother, Clay's, wedding to Arlene Moirano. Raimundo once again held the flowers back from her before he responded further to her statements.

Raimundo: Ah, so you admit that believing in marriage is kinda like believing in Santa Claus, do you?

Kimiko Tohomiko: No, I_

For one reason or another, Kimiko had suddenly found herself at a loss for any further reply to Raimundo's latest comment about his own hatred towards marriage. Then, she finally decided to just let the whole thing go since she was so horridly bad at arguing.

Kimiko Tohomiko (continued): I don't know why I'm arguing about this with a perfect stranger. Yes, marriage, like everything else that's good and important, isn't easy. Cynicism, on the other hand, always is.

Kimiko made a grab for the flowers she had received from Jessie's elder brother, Clay Bailey, and his new bride, Arlene Moirano, as their condolences about her temporary black out onto the hardwood floor of the church which held their wedding that night for a third time in a row. Only during her third time of trying to reclaim her flowers from Raimundo's intriguingly large hands was she actually successful in her endeavor.

Kimiko Tohomiko (continued): It was very interesting meeting you.

Kimiko shook Raimundo's hand just after she had reclaimed her flowers from out of those hands.

Raimundo: Bye.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Yeah.

Then, Kimiko finally began to walk across the street back to her house. That was when Raimundo felt the need to comment further on Kimiko's own presence at weddings, although in technical terms, Raimundo's comment to Kimiko about her wedding attendance was more of a question about her presence in weddings than a statement.

Raimundo: So, you gonna be in more weddings next weekend?

Kimiko only ignored Raimundo's question about her wedding attendance as she was in no way interested in talking to or listening to him anymore.

Kimiko Tohomiko: I have to go.

Raimundo, on the other hand, still wanted to get the goods on Kimiko.


A/N: sounds kinda ironic, doesn't it?


Raimundo: How many have you been in, by the way? Just, like, ballpark.

Kimiko Tohomiko: Goodnight.

Back in Jack Spicer's taxicab, Raimundo was on his way to his own house with a ridiculously, yet ironically happy smile on his face upon having even met a girl like Kimiko Tohomiko. The well-tanned and incredulously handsome, yet extremely cynical and ill-mannered young man was suddenly the happiest he had been in such a long time.