Warnings: Wow, this was longer than I thought it was…

Chapter Twenty-Seven: Waiting Takes Forever

I ran to the practice ring, and, upon arrival, collapsed in a patch of shade created by an old tree. I smeared a few tears across my face with the back of my hand, and pretended that I wasn't going to cry any more.

For a while, I watched Owen sparring with Dhal, but eventually my brother delivered the fatal blow to his friend and the match was over. My tears and sniffles rushed back as soon as the hiss of steel on steel ceased; my distraction was gone and I was left to wallowing in my sorrows.

"Hey," Owen knelt beside me and chucked me under the chin, "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Everything." I informed him miserably. "Everything."

He snorted derisively. "Everything can't be wrong, stupid. At least one thing must have gone right."

A tear slipped out. "I can't think of anything."

"Come on now," Owen glared at me, "That's not the happy, cheery Elensar that I know and love! Smile for me, 'Lensar."

"But what's there to smile about?" I burst out, flinging words and tears every which way. "Everything will never be okay."

A determined expression rooted itself onto Owen's face. "Right now, tell me one thing that's good."

I stared at him blankly, unable to think of anything. He waited patiently for several silent seconds. "Well…" I sniffed, "The strawberry pastry I had for breakfast was enjoyable."

Owen looked triumphant. "See? Everything's not all bad." He grinned. "Cheer up, sis."

"But I can't!" I practically wailed. "I've sentenced the man I love to death, and I can't do anything to save him! Well," I amended quickly, "I could do something, but that would be close to treason." I sighed heavily. "It's not fair."

"King Adrian." Owen spat the name. "He's not worth your time, Elensar, if I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times."

"It's not fair," I repeated stubbornly.

My brother raised a cynical eyebrow. "Your basis of comparison is…?"

Uncomprehending, I started to speak, but stopped mid word. "I don't know."

"See." He smiled again; that same self-satisfied smile that one might expect to see on a cat.

"I hate you," I told him affably.

"Love you too," He replied, smiling. "Cheer up, will you?"

I crossed my arms and belligerently stated, "No."

"Fine." Owen stood and offered a hand to help me up. "Mope then, see how fun that is."

"I will, thank you." I let him pull me up. "And I will enjoy it very much." I fixed my skirt primly, then surprised him with a hug. "Thanks, Owen."

He patted me awkwardly on the back. "Um…no problem." I gave him one last squeeze before he grunted in protest. "Elensar, I'd like to breathe."

"No, you don't need to do that…" I let him go.

I would have said more, but Dhal chose that moment to stroll over and join our conversation. "Why hello, Princess."

"Hello, Sir Dhal." I smiled politely. "I'm afraid it must be goodbye, as well, because I really must be off now!"

Prince and knight bowed simultaneously. "Farewell, then."

"Cheers!" Owen called after me as I scurried away. I turned around to wave for a moment, and then disappeared inside, feeling much relieved.

However, as soon as I stepped into the dim interior of my home, I felt the depression weigh in on me again. "What am I going to do?" I asked myself softly, sinking back against a wall. "I can't go on like this, it's just too much trouble!" I slid all the way down the wall so that I was sitting on the floor in a pile of skirts. "Help," I murmured, resting my head against the cool stone.

"Princess?" I shrieked as a hand touched my shoulder.

"What?" I looked up into Markus's worried face. "You."

"Yes, me," he replied mildly, seeming not to notice the distaste that tinged my voice. "Are you feeling all right, Princess?"

I wanted to say no, but the "Yes," just slipped right out.

Markus crouched at my side. "You're sure, now? You don't need an escort to your room or any other place, do you?"

My lips twisted into a wry smile as he obscurely mentioned the ballroom where he had taken me the previous night. "No, not at all, good sir. I feel fine."

"Like hell you do," he muttered, and promptly hauled me to my feet. "I think you could use some rest."

"What are you, my nanny?" I challenged him. "You think I'm not old enough to look after myself?"

He smiled grimly at me. "No, I think you're getting hysterical."

"Shut up." I folded my arms defensively across my chest. "I'm fine." I took a deep breath and smiled cheerily. "See? Fine."

"I still think it would be best if I escorted you back to your rooms." Markus's hand clamped tightly on my elbow. "Come, now, don't be difficult."

"Fine," I repeated again, and let him push me in the direction of my room.

Once we were there, the soldier shoved me into my study and instantly closed the door. He turned to face me, a dangerous expression on his face. "Princess, what in the name of all things holy and good do you think you're doing?"

I leveled him with my best blank stare. "Pertaining to…?"

He stalked over to me. "You're throwing away the trust of your entire family for your selfish desires. You can't know what you want! You're too young!"

"Do you know what you want?" I could feel the fear creeping up from my stomach, where it had been carousing scant moments earlier, into my throat, which tightened alarmingly.

"That's not important." He brushed off my comment easily. "Do you know what you're doing?"

I sighed, trying my very hardest to appear bored. "No. Not at all. I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing, sitting here in my study, talking to you. Do you know what I'm doing?"

Markus seemed slightly taken aback. "W-well," he sputtered momentarily. "Yes," he pronounced decisively, "You are ruining your life, and eleven other lives- the lives of your sisters! If you betray their secret, who knows what will happen to them?"

"They'll get married, have babies, and lead happy, normal lives, that's what they'll do!" I stood up so that I could add more emphasis to my words. "Is that really such a bad thing?"

"No, of course not, but this is what they know, what you know, Elensar." He took one step closer to me, so that we were suddenly so close as to almost be touching. "It's your life, it's tradition, and it's never ending. Will you be the one to break the tradition? Will you?" He pulled back abruptly, and the gulf between us seemed bottomless.

"You know." I whispered it softly. "You know, and you haven't told. Why not?" I sashayed a little closer. "Is it because we princess aren't beautiful enough? Is it because we aren't perfect? Is it because we're all too fragile?"

"No." He word broke through my rant. "Not at all."

I gazed up from beneath my lashes imploringly. "Why?"

Markus turned away from me and murmured something.

"What?" I gently spun him around and tilted his chin up with a soft push. "Why, then?"

"You're all silly girls who think only of themselves." His intense stare pounced and captured my own, and no matter how I tried to break free, I simply couldn't look away from that arresting stare.

"How…how…" I trailed off, wondering if 'how dare you say such things' would sound far too cliché. "That's not very nice," I settled on.

"Is the truth ever nice?" He smirked sardonically at me.

I glared. "I'm not just a silly girl."

"Yes you are. What do you call all that dancing business? And you're gambling with Kind Adrian's life. That's not a very smart or rational thing to do, now is it?" Markus pointed these things out with positively no emotion in his voice.

"But- but…" I frowned. He was right. "No fair."

He seemed slightly surprised, not to mention confused, at my choice of response. "What's not fair about it, Princess? It's perfectly logical if you'd only think about it."

"I don't like to think," I deadpanned, hoping to break the seriousness of the moment.

"Obviously," he replied, matching sarcasm for sarcasm.

A thought occurred to me, and I asked Markus, "If we're so silly, then, why haven't you told our secret? You know it, obviously."

He shrugged. "You have to learn. You all have to grow up." Then he sighed. "I'm Evadne's man, and it's she who pays my wages, so I mustn't cross her. As you well know, Princess, vexing the Eldest is not a wise thing to do."

I laughed softly. "Don't I know that well!"

"Yes, milady, you do." Markus started suddenly, and bowed. "I must be going, Princess, forgive me for my untoward conversation and departure." He saluted me, and then strode briskly out the door, leaving a nonplussed Raquel in his wake.

"Does milady need anything?" She asked me politely.

I gazed at her blankly for several seconds before her words registered. "Oh, no. Thank you, though."

Raquel curtsied and slipped out the door, leaving me to muse in silence.

I had a few hours left to debate which action I would take. Would I tell Adrian, or would I do what I had done the previous night and drug him. If I did incapacitate him, it would have to be through a different method than wine, since he might be expecting that. However, if he had believed me about last night being a dream to me, then I was relatively safe.

There were too many ifs and unknowns for my taste.

I wondered if I should tell him. I wanted to, for my own selfish reasons. I wanted to be able to love him for a good long while yet, and if I enabled him to "discover" our secret, I could do just that.

Markus's accusation sent me spiraling off on to many other paths; saving Adrian would be selfish, but keeping the secret would be too. I realized with a dejected sigh that I had come to a stalemate in regards to my motives. Anything I did, I would do to benefit myself first and foremost.

I moved on to other patterns of thought. My romantic heart, full of the sometimes sentimental and almost always trashy romance novels that were my reading materials of choice, told me how wonderfully romantic that it would be to play the heroine and save Adrian, my knight in distress. It would be a cliché reversal of roles that would play out beautifully and we'd ride off happily into the sunset and live happily ever after.

Right. I turned back to the dilemma at hand; I had to find a way to save Adrian without feeling like I was betraying myself. The thing was, I couldn't think of one. I kept going in endless circles, feeling at turn faithful to my family and at other times faithful to Adrian.

It was confusing and it made my head hurt.

I rang a little bell that was conveniently within my reach.

"Yes, milady?" Raquel appeared at the door. "Do you need something?"

"Yes," I rubbed my forehead thoughtfully. "I'd like some juice or something. Something cool and liquid."

"Right away, Princess." She curtseyed and whisked herself away, disappearing with the quiet efficiency that I was getting so accustomed to.

A few moments later, she returned, bearing a glass and a pitcher on a tray. "Here, for you," She pronounced softly. "It's grapefruit," she offered helpfully.

I smiled, "Thank you!"

She curtseyed again. "You're welcome."

I took a long draught of the wonderfully cool and refreshing beverage, and sighed happily. "Just what I needed." As Raquel was about to leave, I called her back for one more request. "Raquel, could you tell people that I'm not available for visitors, and won't be until later this evening?"

"Of course I will, milady." She gave me a soft smile and nodded. "You're obviously very much in need of rest. You look rather pale."

I grinned, and it was a smile that was shared between conspirators. It was good to have an ally. "Yes, yes, I am feeling a little faint. Perhaps I shall lie down a while."

"I would highly recommend that, milady." Her eyes twinkled and she giggled shyly.

As she left, I walked over to one of my bookshelves and trailed a finger along the spines of the novels in search of something to read. I finally settled on a story about a young common girl who had to save her country by defeating emotions and overcoming the class system. She also managed to net a Prince for herself in the process, but that was just a sub-plot. This was one of my favorites.

I had just been really wrapped up in the story when Evadne swept in. I sighed; it was very hard to say no to my eldest sister when she was in one of her moods. "Yes, Evadne?"

"I figured you weren't really sleeping," She declared triumphantly.

I arched an insolent eyebrow. "Is that all."

"Oh do play nice, darling." She flounced over to my side and peered over my shoulder. "Reading about Liana again? You know," She started in on me, conversationally, "There really was a Syrlan at one point in time I heard. It was apparently quite the Kingdom."

This was suspicious. Evadne wasn't personable unless she wanted something.

"I'm at the exciting part, so would you mind skipping ahead to whatever it is you want?" I carefully slid a bookmark into the pages and deliberately set aside the book.

"You're no fun," She said sourly. "The others at least play along for a little while."

"Deal." I crossed my arms and slouched further into the chair.

"Fine." She huffed. "I want to talk to you about tonight. Now, before you interrupt me with a thousand and one questions, let me at least say three words." She frowned. "I know that you're planning on telling him somehow and I'd like to let you know tha-"

I interrupted her with a droll smile. "How do you know that?"

"Shut up." It really wasn't very ladylike of her to say such a thing. "Now, if you tell him, the world won't end, but out nightly charade will end."

"Oh come on, Evadne. Everyone and his brother knows what we do. It's the worst kept secret in the entire kingdom." I scratched my nose idly. "Seriously, Evadne, welcome to the real world. Everyone knows."

"But they can't prove it. Until they can prove it, we can go on doing whatever we want to." She leaned in conspiratorially, "Don't you like that idea?"

"Is this some kind of power trip?" I asked her. "You want to be Queen, but you can't, because Father's not dead yet, and so you could just be taking hold of power wherever you can."

Evadne looked furious. My day was officially made. "I can see that you either don't care or make no effort to sympathize with your family."

She had decided to play the infamous guilt card, since I was notorious for responding well to that ploy. I steeled myself and managed a rebellious, "So?"

Evadne was aghast, "So? That's all you have to say? So? To your own kin? Dear sister, I am appalled at this lack of loyalty. I demand that-"

"Shut up."

The expression on her face intensified tenfold. "What did you just say to me, young lady?"

"I told you to shut up." I hastily glanced away, to avoid a look that would surely have Medusa-like properties. "Because, um…well…" I took a deep breath and launched into a half-formed tirade. "All this dancing is suddenly seeming rather pointless. All we do is go dancing at night, enslave a few princes here and there and generally disrupt the country. Father has no way of marrying us off because we have the stupid challenge of the dance, and all we really are, all of us sisters, that is, are selfish, spoiled little girls who care only about themselves." I sat back, amazed at my long, spontaneous speech.

"You've been talking to Markus, haven't you?"

"Yes!" I glared at her defiantly.

"He always tries to convince all the aristocracy that everyone is equal, but really, it just isn't so." She laughed lightly. "He just has some odd ideas about how a country should be run. That's why Father gave him to me, you know. He figured that I could set him straight." Evadne smiled oh-so-sweetly at me. "Don't listen to him, it's really not good for you."

I grumbled sourly, "I'll listen to whoever I please."

"Silly darling." She patted me on the head. "You'll learn." My sister laughed again and asked, "I expect to see you at the dance tonight, with no one other than Johan. He's expecting you, you know. I think he's quite taken with you."

"He can't help but be taken with me." My hand inched forward, reaching for my book.

She tsked. "Don't be so conceited Elensar! Not everyone has fallen in love with you."

I flicked my gaze up to her for an instant. "You know what I mean. You made him that way. With your wine, or whatever it is."

"Oh that," she said, waving a hand as if she wasn't drugging the sons of kings. "That's just wine, really. It's all in their head. They think they've been put under a spell, and so they stay. It's quite simple, really." Her lips curved upward into a sadistic little smile. "I love it."

"You're sick. Get out of my room."

Evadne's mouth dropped open in surprise, and she looked like she would protest, but she just left quickly instead. That had been easier that I had expected. I went back to reading.

Raquel entered softly sometime later. "Milady, darkness has fallen. Is it your wish to be readied for bed now?"

"I'll do it myself, Raquel. Go to bed." I stood up slowly, stretching.

"Yes, Princess." She curtseyed out.

I waited until my entire suite was silent, and then I crept out. I saw the wine that Alyssa had left me sitting in two elaborate goblets on my dresser, along with a note that read, "Do the right thing, Elensar. I know you can." I snorted derisively and went to the closet that was set into the wall. A tap on the back wall two handspans down and three across opened another panel in the wall and revealed a beautiful dress. I touched it and pulled back, afraid that I'd break it. Steeling my resolve, I gently pulled it out.

It was time.

Author's Note: Hey look! I'm updating on my own! Isn't it amazing? I don't believe it…My reviewers, per usual, are amazing people! I'm finally done with my evil critical paper, and I'm almost done with school…only twenty-some days left. I'm so excited! I can't wait for summer and warm weather…I hope you liked this chapter. I wasn't too fond of it at first, probably because I kept going around in circles. I'm happier with the ending of this chapter…and I hope you are too.

Well, anyway…time to say thank you to my reviewers:

Lilred-07: Thank you! And you're right…I probably won't kill Adrian. ;)

Zagato: Thanks! XD

TinkerBell394587: I'm thinking you're right…she does have some special tennis shoes. My guess is that they're gold. :P

Miss Piratess: Thank you much:)

ElvisLivesAgain: Will she tell him? I guess you'll just have to wait until next chapter to find out…mwahaha!

Cerri: Thanks for recommending it! I appreciate it! I'm glad you think that the characters a real- usually I have trouble keeping them that way. :)

Rainkisser: Well, let's see…I'm giving you now three un-reviewed chapters! Two from before and now this one! But don't think that just because I updated on my own this once means that I'll do it again! I just had lots of time right now…:P

Dragonblade Goddess: Thanks:)

Athena Diagon Cat: I would have started running earlier too…I probably wouldn't have gone to breakfast…lol.

V: Thank you:D

LindyLou78: I figured out how he gets the message! But…you'll have to keep reading…muahah:P

Moonsea: Wow…two hours? I feel special! Thanks:D

Jyska: Thank you muchly for your compliments! I'm guessing that I will have about three more chapters, making 30 total. But that's just a rough estimate…:)

Well, until next chapter, kiddos…au revoir.