THE PERSON I LOOK UP TO

Chapter 10: "Weeping Willow"
A Neo-Sailor Moon fanfic

By Bill K.

Through the great forest they came. Nearly seventy in number, they came as one,following the bidding of their queen. The birds quieted and the small forest animals hushed and hid, observing the humans as they made their way toward the river. In the lead was a woman,
with white hair and a fair face set in unyielding determination. She strode purposefully through the forest, unafraid of anything that might come, for she had the divine blessing of the Mother Forest and the power that came with it. And she would do the bidding of the Mother Forest and bring the enlightenment of the Mother Forest to those who did not believe.

And they would believe. They would believe or be swept under.

"Mama," a young girl timidly said, gazing up at her mother as they walked near the back of the pack, "where are we going?"

"To the home of the Torgus, Peusou," her mother, a quiet, timid thing of just twenty summers, replied.

"Why? Sailor Hayashi always said the Torgus were bad," Peusou, just a child of five, inquired.

"She's," the mother began haltingly, "she's going to-to deal with them."

"Is she going to hurt them?"

The woman looked down. "If they resist."

"But I thought it was wrong to hurt people."

"Shh," her mother cautioned. "Others are listening." The woman glanced up and saw to her left an older woman glance back at her with hateful disdain. She pulled her daughter closer and continued on, avoiding the suspicious glare of her fellow clanswoman.

The procession emerged from the forest and came to the bank of the raging river. Some began to turn, to journey downstream to the bridge that would safely carry them across. Shinrin, though, stood and waited for her people to realize that she was not headed where they were. The people quickly stopped and turned inquiringly toward her.

"You need not depend upon that which destroys the bounty of the forest," Shinrin said with a clarity of purpose that was exhilarating to some and frightening to others. "Abandon them and be pure."

"But how can we cross the mighty river without the bridge?" one of the men at the head of the pack asked.

"The Mother Forest provides for all who believe in her," Shinrin replied.

She turned to the river and spread her arms out. As her head lolled back slightly, the Queen took on a green glow. Her animal fur toga hiked up on her lithe body as she spread her arms higher. While her subjects watched, Queen Shinrin stepped forward toward the swift current of the river. Several gasped and surged forward, seeking to grab Shinrin before she fell in.

But she didn't fall in. Her foot stepped atop the water as if it were flat and hard rather than coursing and writhing beneath her. She stepped again and again and it was as if the water of the river dared not touch her. The people of Shinrin's clan stared in wonder.

"Come," she said, looking back over her shoulder at them. "Follow me. If you believe, follow me. If you believe, walk with me on the path of light."

Some of her more zealous followers moved immediately. They clamored up onto the invisible bridge and as their feet touched it their soles glowed green. Others hung back. It was too much to comprehend, too much of a leap of faith for some, while others bore no ill will to the Torgus so long as they stayed on their side of the river. No good could come from venturing across the river on Queen Shinrin's magic bridge of nothing and they hung back.

Their unwillingness to follow was quickly noted.

"Obey your queen!" snapped one of the men, barking at the stragglers. His eyes focused on Peusou and her mother. "Get on the divine bridge now! Your queen demands it!"

"But," gasped the woman, trembling with fear, "what if my child should fall? She is so young! She-she might not yet have the faith to sustain the bridge of nothing!"

"The Mother Forest provides through our great Queen Shinrin!" snapped the man. "Obey her!"

"But if she falls into the river, she will die!" cried the mother. "She's all I have!"

"If she falls, it is the will of the great Mother Forest," the cold reply came. "You dare to question the great Mother Forest? Are you with us or do you name yourself enemy?"

"Please, Mama, let's go home!" whimpered Peusou.

"Turn your back on Queen Shinrin and you'll have no home," the man growled.

The woman dropped her head, clutching her daughter and hoping that some divine providence would arrive and spare her the decision facing her. When none came, she stooped her shoulders and prodded her daughter toward the bridge. As they stepped on the energy field, the woman clutched her daughter tighter. If they were to fall through to their deaths, at least they would die together.

To her relief, the energy field over the river held and she and her daughter skittered across to the other side. Once on land again, the young mother breathed a sigh of relief. Her relief was short-lived, though, snuffed out by the sullen stares of those who believed in the greatness of the Mother Forest and of Queen Shinrin - - instead of live and let live.


"You're Sailor Eichi?" gasped Sailor Moon. Her mother, Queen Serenity, was equally amazed. The three women were in a modest cabin set in the forest about a half mile from the Torgus village.

"I was," the woman named Shintoru said. There was an ache to her reply.

"But Shinrin said you were dead," Serenity stated with amazement.

"In her eyes, I am," sighed the woman. She reflexively brushed her blonde hair away from her face. "I dared to question her attack on the Torgus. I dared to question the logic of forcing your ways upon another people. I began to recognize that believing something different than what you believe doesn't make another person evil." Shintoru expelled an exhausted sigh.

"She attacked the Torgus?" Sailor Moon questioned. "I thought they attacked her clan."

"In her mind, they did," Shintoru explained and as she spoke, both Sailor Moon and Serenity noticed the same qualities of logic and tolerance that Ami had. "They rejected the ways of the forest. They began to farm, to build tools, to construct dwellings - - to progress scientifically. This was heresy to Hayashi. It was a slap in the face, a rejection of everything she held dear, everything she believed in. She was determined to go to them, to find out who had corrupted them and deal with them." Shintoru snorted bitterly. "Dealing with evil - - that's what senshi do."

"If this is too painful," Serenity began.

"Gaining knowledge may incur some pain," Shintoru whispered, almost as an oath, "but the real harm comes from remaining ignorant. I'll go on if you like. This isn't nearly as painful as when it actually happened." Serenity nodded. "We went to the Torgus village, Hayashi,
Kokoro and I, to find out what was corrupting these people. As we investigated, I began to realize that there was no evil, corrupting force. They had just chosen a different lifestyle."

Shintoru stared at nothing, lost in her memory and guilt.

"Hayashi's efforts were not gentle. She let her outrage get the better of her. The Torgus, in turn, began using force against us to repel us from their homes. It's only logical. That in turn set off Kokoro. Kokoro never was one to hide her emotions - - and she never was one to shy away from protecting Hayashi." Shintoru's shy smile turned into a frown. "The Torgus didn't stand a chance against either Hayashi or Kokoro. Together it was - - genocide. I couldn't let her do that. She'd always stood for the best of the forest. I tried to dissuade her. I tried to stop her."

"And she turned on you?" Serenity asked, a tear in her voice. Shintoru nodded.

"That act of - - well, betrayal is too harsh of a word, but it's what Kokoro felt. It made her realize Hayashi was out of control. They began to battle. Kokoro was actually a threat to her, which naturally brought Kamen Irori." Shintoru sighed again. "If only he'd arrived sooner. Sailor Kokoro might still be alive."

"She killed one of her own senshi?" whispered Sailor Moon.

"We all acted badly," Shintoru said. "At the time, I failed to notice just how horrified she was. She and Kaiki - - Kokoro - - were like sisters in everything but blood. Hayashi was shattered, and for all my supposed intellect, I didn't notice. I was too busy feeling angry and betrayed." The woman grimaced. "During everything, the Torgus saw their chance to strike back. A spear - - one of the 'evil tools' Hayashi railed against, hit Kamen Irori in the ribs. I know something about healing. He was alive, but he didn't have long. His lung was punctured and organs were damaged. He might last the night, but not much longer, and only in great agony. Hayashi nearly went insane in that moment. Perhaps she did, though that would be an easy explanation. She poured all of her power into Kamen Irori, trying to heal him. It was beyond her, though. I knew it." Shintoru paused. "And then suddenly it wasn't."

"Her moment of supreme crisis triggered her ascension," Serenity said.

"Is that what happened?" Shintoru asked. "It explains many things. The Torgus were forgotten. We retrieved Kokoro and Kamen Irori and left. Hayashi spent the entire night healing him while I laid Kaiki to rest. In the morning, I grieved for one lost friend and rejoiced that two others had survived." Shintoru looked down. "But Hayashi had changed. Changed beyond the scope of her abilities; she was different. Or perhaps I just saw things more clearly. Looking back, I can recall incidents and oddly phrased answers to questions that lead me to think she's always been overly zealous in her belief in the Mother Forest mythology and I was too blinded by friendship and devotion to notice."

"Please don't blame yourself," Serenity said earnestly. "We all are obligated to be worthy of another's friendship and trust."

Shintoru silently digested this, mulling it over along with the fresh pain of old wounds. Serenity and Sailor Moon sat and watched her.

"So, um," Sailor Moon began awkwardly, "is there anything you can do about that leaf stuck in Mom's chest? Because Mom's the only person who can stand up to Shinrin right now."

"I wish there was," Shintoru said. "Perhaps someone as wise and gentle as you, Serenity, might pierce the veil of zealous righteousness that has corrupted my-my friend. But Kamen Irori's leaf attack is very powerful, and since his ascension to Danro Ganjou it's become even more powerful. It's beyond anything I can do. But I vow to defend you if he does manage to track you here."

Serenity nodded gratefully, trying not to let her disappointment show. Then she grimaced and held her head with her hand.

"Mom?" Sailor Moon gasped fearfully.

"Just dizzy," Serenity wheezed. "It feels like the room is spinning."

"I have an herbal potion that can ease the dizzying effects of Kamen Irori's leaf attack," Shintoru offered. She rose and headed for the next room in the cabin.

Queen Serenity felt the steadying hands of her daughter on her shoulders and was grateful for it. Her hands went up and grasped her daughter by the arms. When her sight cleared enough, she glanced over at the girl. Immediately she saw the disillusionment mixed in with the concern for her.

"Usa?" she prompted softly.

"I don't get it, Mom," Sailor Moon said. "Shinrin was a senshi. Senshi aren't supposed to act like that. Senshi are supposed to help people."

"In her mind, she thinks she is," Serenity offered.

"Mom, don't make excuses for her!"

"Usa, even senshi are human," Serenity replied gently. "The power we possess can corrupt us. You remember the story of Sailor Galaxia, don't you? Even the best of us can fall prey to the corrupting influence of power."

"You didn't," Sailor Moon said. "What kept you from giving in to it?"

Serenity smiled shyly. "Well, probably because I've never thought my power made me better than everyone else. I've always questioned what I do and I've always turned to the advice of others and listened to that advice. And whenever I do begin to get a swelled head, I have you or Rei or Luna to put me in my place." The Queen sobered. "Shinrin, unfortunately, lacks the humility to temper her power. She thinks her vision is infallible - - and the minute you start thinking that, you're done for." Serenity gripped her daughter's arm urgently. "Usa, some day you're going to ascend to the level that Shinrin and I are at now. If you don't remember anything else I've told you, please remember that humility is just as important to you as power, maybe more. It could save you, and it could save many other people, too."

Sailor Moon stared solemnly at her mother.

"I will, Mom," she said in a very small voice. The grateful look she got from her mother made her feel good about herself.


"HAYASHI IS RETURNING!"

The words stopped everyone in the village in their tracks. The memory was still fresh in everyone's mind of the last time Sailor Hayashi had stormed into their village, using her powers to assault homes, fences, implements and anything else that offended her righteous eye and attacking anyone who dared disagree with her. No one wanted her return. They had barely fended her off the last time and only because her two fellow senshi had turned upon her.

But they knew she would be back, and they were ready.

The mob swept into the clearing with Shinrin in the lead. The more zealous of her followers crowded around her, secure in her proximity. Those swept along because they lacked the knowledge or the courage to defy her hung back and watched with confusion or anxiety. Shinrin stood at the front of the horde, tall and confident, her white hair blowing in the wind and her gaze sure and strong. They found the remaining members of the village ducked down behind any cover they could find, glaring out at them - - ready for anything. In moments, one man rose from behind his concealment.

"Leave here, Hayashi!" he called out a defiant warning. "We don't want you here!"

"I am Shinrin now, Queen of the Forest Clan and the chosen vessel of the Great Mother Forest herself," Shinrin called out. "I have come to give you one last chance. Abandon your sacrilege and return to the bosom of the forest that created you."

"Farming is not a sacrilege!" the man volleyed back. "Building tools and constructing shelters with those tools is not a sacrilege! We have abandoned the old ways for new ways! That is not wrong! That is just different! It is no crime to be different!"

"You reject the shelter of the trees for these huts of mud and stone! You reject the bounty of the trees and presume to be the Mother Forest herself, cultivating plants you grow yourself! You clothe yourselves in woven fibers instead of the skins of animals provided by the Mother Forest! You spit in the face of the Mother Forest!"

Shinrin's eyes blazed as she spoke and ally and adversary alike could feel the air crackle with building energy.

"But the Mother Forest is forgiving of her wayward children," Shinrin said with unearthly calm. Then she gestured to her right with a down-sweep of her hand and to the astonishment of all an invisible force crushed a home flat. "Confess your wayward ways. Reject them and embrace the ways of the forest once more and she will welcome you back with open arms." Shinrin gestured to her left and flattened a small field of crops. "The Mother Forest is a loving mother and only wishes the return of her wayward children."

Shinrin gave them a gentle but mirthless smile. Her answer was a thrown rock. It struck her energy field about shoulder high and glanced off. Eyes narrowing, Shinrin pointed toward a stone border wall. The wall flew apart, revealing three men and a woman behind it.

One of the men was seized by an invisible hand and hauled up twenty feet into the air. Shinrin calmly walked up underneath where he dangled, struggling to free himself from the grip of nothing. Everybody watched her, the mood of the gathered a swirling cauldron of guilt and terror, triumph and anger, awe and desperation.

"LET HIM GO!" wailed the woman, reaching for her dangling mate as the other two men held her back. Shinrin ignored her, focusing on the man her power held aloft.

"Why?" Shinrin asked, hurt and confused. "Why do you continue to reject her love? Are you possessed? Are you insane? Why do you throw away such a wonderful gift?"

The pressure around the man continued unabated. He struggled in vain until it finally wrenched a strangled scream of agony from him.

And then he slumped forward and breathed no more.


Serenity suddenly stirred. She tried to push up from her place on the floor, then stopped short and grimaced. One hand clutched her head while the other grasped at the leaf in her chest.

"Mom, don't get up!" pleaded Sailor Moon. "You have to rest!"

"Your daughter is right," Shintoru concurred. "The more active you are, the more the leaf of Kamen Irori leeches from you. You must rest and regain your strength. Only then do you have a hope of removing it."

"But," panted Serenity, struggling to pierce the haze and get up, "Shinrin's attacked the Torgus. I felt it. She's killing them."

"I feared it would come to this," Shintoru whispered bitterly. "I had hoped it would wait until I could think of a way to stop her. But that hope is gone."

"I have to help them," Serenity persisted, struggling against Shintoru and Sailor Moon. "I made her what she is! I have to stop her!"

"You can do nothing against her in your present condition," Shintoru told her.

"I have to try! I'm the only one with a chance to stop her!"

"It's suicide, Mom!" Sailor Moon wailed.

"It's genocide if I don't!" heaved Serenity.

Serenity struggled to her feet as Shintoru backed away. Immediately she teetered and Sailor Moon caught her.

"You're not going to listen to reason, are you?" Sailor Moon fussed. "All right then, let's do this. We'll face this together, as senshi."

"Eichi Power Make Up!" they heard behind them. Turning, they found Shintoru in a gold tunic with a blue skirt, bow and boots, all made of animal hide. She met their gaze proudly. "I vowed to defend you, Queen Serenity. I can best keep that vow as Sailor Eichi. Perhaps three senshi may triumph against Shinrin where two might not."

"I'm sorry to hear that, Shintoru," came a male voice. The three women whirled and found Danro standing in the doorway.

continued in Chapter 11