Mischievous Love
Card Captor Sakura
Chapter Fifteen
*starjade*
In Which A Bush Talker, Ultimate Plans and Idiots Appear
" And then I called him Gumdrop Honey Doodle! You should've seen his face!!"
Tomoyo laughed. " I can imagine it!"
Sakura could not stop laughing. " It was so funny! It was embarrassing at the end, when Syaoran leapt at me and his mom walked in. I left quickly after that, of course blowing kisses to everyone and telling them I'd be back before night, to wash Syaoran's underwear, since he doesn't do it himself."
Tomoyo's eyes widened. " You, my girl, have more guts than anyone I've seen before!"
Sakura laughed evilly. " I know! Syaoran won't mess with me anymore!"
Tomoyo rolled her eyes. " You know, Syaoran didn't even do anything to you lately. Why did you go embarrass him in front of his family, pretty much stripping him of his dignity, his reputation and his pride?"
Sakura stared at her. " When you put it like that, of course it sounds mean! But all I did was pay him back! What did we do when we first moved here? Nothing! So what did we do to deserve all their pranks?"
Tomoyo rolled her eyes. " We encouraged it, Sakura! We retaliated-"
Sakura grew angry. " What do you think we should've done? Sat around like teletubbies, swinging around purple purses and riding on scooters and ignoring the baby in the sun?? We'll be ferocious teletubbies and get black purses and carry around knives-"
Tomoyo was dot eyed. " Sakura? Sakura!"
Sakura stopped. " What?"
Tomoyo shook her head pityingly. " Shut up."
Suddenly the doorbell rang. Tomoyo and Sakura fought their way through the doorway and raced down the stairs. Tomoyo opened the door breathlessly.
" Eriol??"
Sakura snickered. " That thing has more brains than Eriol."
It was a package. A little box lying on the step. Tomoyo glared at Sakura. " Eriol has a lot more brains than a package!"
Sakura rose her eyebrows. " I'll believe it when I see it!"
Tomoyo made a face and leaned over to pick up the package. It was covered in gold paper and the tag said, ' To Cherry Blossom.'
" I'm guessing that means you..." Tomoyo said, her voice sceptical as Sakura opened the box.
Inside all the wrappings was something soft. Sakura pulled it out and then gasped.
" WHAT THE HELL?" She yelled.
It was a pair of boxers.
A pair of pink hearted boxers.
On it was a picture of Sakura, dolled up with blue eye shadow and pink lipstick, clinging to Syaoran who looked absolutely green.
In Memory of Sakura Kinomoto....Who Will Be Ambushed By The Master Prankers, was what labelled the shorts.
" I am going to kill them!" Sakura said through gritted teeth.
Tomoyo was laughing hard. " You...you look like your absolutely in love with Syaoran! He is so going to black mail you with this!"
Sakura growled, " Remember the saran wrap over the toilet seat? If you want to pee comfortably , I suggest you shut up."
*************
It was THE DAY. The DAY in which THE VICTIM will fall HEAD OVER HEELS (Eriol hopes that it will be literally) in LOVE with the CHOSEN ONE who is of NO USE but shall only be the BLAMED ONE at the END of all the CHAOS and the-
You catch my drift.
Syaoran was crouched near a tree stump, trying not to listen to Eriol's insane giggling.
" This is gonna be perfect!" Eriol said.
" Something could go wrong," Syaoran said.
Eriol grinned. " Nothing could go wrong! We are like the duo couple!"
" Couple??"
" We fight justice! We trick people into thinking we are decent! In which we are not!!"
" Get your arm off of me, Eriol."
" Don't you love me anymore? Why are you shuddering?"
" Shut up. Look, here comes Hiiro."
Hiiro was ambling along the pathway and Eriol jerked out and grabbed Hiiro's arm, pulling him behind the tree stump as well.
" OW! OW! SEXUAL ABUSE! CALL THE OPERATOR!" Hiiro screamed.
" Shut up, Hiiro!" Syaoran growled. " It's me, Syaoran and the brainless he-she over there."
Hiiro sighed with relief. " Thank god! I thought you two were going to rape me!"
Syaoran rolled his eyes. He was surrounded by idiots.
Eriol blinked. " Why would you want to call the operator?"
Hiiro brushed himself off. " To ask for the number for 911 of course."
Eriol and Syaoran sweat dropped. Total idiots.
" So when is the chick coming?" Hiiro asked.
Eriol got that slinky smile again. " In fifteen minutes or so. You got the conversation down pat, right?"
Hiiro blinked. " Conver-sation?"
Syaoran grabbed Hiiro's arm. " You did memorize that sheet we gave you, didn't you??"
Hiiro laughed, nervously. " Sh-eet?"
Eriol jumped to his feet. " I am going to kick your ass so hard, you're gonna be constipated for the rest of your pathetic life-"
" Eriol!" Syaoran cautioned. " Shut up."
Eriol glared at Hiiro and Syaoran paced back and forth. " What are we going to do, she's going to be here in ten minutes and that monkey over there is so brainless...I got it!"
Syaoran quickly told the other two his plan, and in the nick of time too, for just at that minute, Sakura was headed up the pathway.
" Get out there!" Syaoran growled and pushed Hiiro out into the pathway.
Hiiro stumbled onto the pathway and Sakura jumped back, startled by his sudden appearance.
" Hey, Hiiro..." Sakura said, a bit confusedly.
Hiiro rubbed his sweaty palms against his jeans and grinned. He snapped his fingers behind his back and Syaoran slapped a hand against his forehead. Extreme idiots.
" Say, hi, Sakura!" Syaoran hissed.
Hiiro recovered. " Say, Hi Sakura!"
Syaoran slapped a hand to his forehead, and Sakura shot a quick glance at the forest around them. " What was that?" Sakura asked, her voice quivering.
Hiiro laughed, his cheeks red. He was snapping behind his back like crazy and Eriol quickly whispered, " That was a mosquito biting my butt. Mosquitoes are attracted to fleshy things."
" That was a mosquito biting my butt. Mosquitoes are attracted to fleshy things!" Hiiro said, cheerfully.
Sakura stared at him, blankly. " Okaaay."
Syaoran glared at Eriol. " Stupid, don't say things like that! It'll ruin the entire plan!"
Eriol shook his head, clucking and said wisely, " The only thing that would ruin the plan right now is if Hiiro has scurvy and was born with breasts."
Syaoran stared at him. " I won't even ask."
Hiiro was snapping behind his back madly while Eriol and Syaoran were arguing and Syaoran muttered a quick curse. " Thank you!" He whispered. That was always the safe way to go.
" Thank you!" Hiiro said.
Sakura rose an eyebrow. " I asked you WHY did you ask me to come here!"
Hiiro snapped at his back again and Syaoran growled, " I swear, I will call off this Ultimate Plan. We are stuck with the Ultimate Loser!"
Eriol grinned and whispered, " Why, to be with you, my lady!"
" Why to be with you, my lady!" Hiiro said, and finally seeming to understand what he was saying, bowed low.
Sakura blinked and then giggled. " Thanks...I guess."
Hiiro snapped at his back again and Sakura gave Hiiro a weird look. " Why are you snapping your fingers near your butt?"
" Another mosquito!" Eriol whispered.
" Another mosquito!" Hiiro said, happily as he straightened.
" Another thing that attracts mosquitoes is scent. Oops, another one at my armpit!" Eriol said cheerfully.
" Another thing that attracts mosquitoes is scent. Oops, another one at my armpit!" Hiiro said, confusedly.
" Dumbass," Syaoran muttered angrily.
" Dumbass!" Hiiro said, grinning.
Silence seemed to echo around the pathway. Sakura was staring at him confusedly. " Did you just call me a dumbass??" Sakura said, her tone threaded with anger.
Syaoran growled. " No, I was talking to myself. I can't believe I didn't notice you before."
Hiiro repeated what Syaoran said and Sakura smiled, her expression a bit lost. " Notice me before?"
Syaoran whispered, " Notice how beautiful you look tonight."
After Hiiro repeated that, Sakura blushed. " Thanks."
" You really are beautiful. You're nice and kind and generous and everything a guy would ever want. You're funny too." Syaoran whispered, his eyes on Sakura.
Hiiro repeated his whole sentence and Sakura was blushing hard. " You're a charmer, you know that?" Sakura said, her voice sweet. " But I don't believe you."
" What??" Eriol burst out. " That was the best thing you ever said-"
" What??" Hiiro started. " That-"
" Shut up!" Syaoran said frantically.
" Shut up!" Hiiro repeated, a bit confusedly now.
Sakura's eyes flew open. " Huh??"
" I'm telling my brain to shut up. I want to kiss you but my brain tells me I have to wait till the moment is just right," Syaoran amended.
Hiiro repeated that with quite a lot of relish, his lips already puckering.
Sakura stared at Hiiro and then smiled, gently. " You're a sweet guy."
Eriol made a hand motion. " Cha-ching, we hit the jackpot!"
" Cha-ching-" Hiiro started.
" No!!" Syaoran cried. " You stupid, idiotic bastard of a frog-"
" No! You stupid, idiotic, bastard of a frog," Hiiro said, his voice loud and happy.
Eriol giggled and Syaoran groaned as Sakura's eyes narrowed again. " Are you talking to yourself again, or did you mean me?"
" To myself!!" Syaoran yelled.
" To myself!!" Hiiro yelled as well.
Sakura was now looking out at the forest, a more scared look on her face. " Did someone just talk...or was it...was it...a g-ghost?"
Hiiro snapped again but Eriol's eyes were shining in that weird way of his. " She's scared of ghosts!"
" She's scared of ghosts!" Hiiro repeated.
Sakura didn't even seem to hear. " Sc-scared? I'm not scared..."
Eriol giggled mischievously and snapped a twig in his hands. Sakura screamed and latched onto Hiiro. Hiiro was now not snapping at all.
" Are you okay?" Hiiro asked, his voice threaded with the right tone of concern.
Sakura nodded, fast. " Yah, yah..."
Hiiro took off his jacket, winking at the wrong bush where he thought Eriol and Syaoran were hiding and wrapped it around Sakura's shoulders. " Are you alright now?"
Sakura giggled. " That's cheesy!"
Hiiro laughed, that I played seven girls at once, kind of laugh. " It may be, but it always works with the girls!"
He winked and Sakura hit him playfully on the shoulder. Another snap echoed in the forest and Sakura gripped Hiiro harder.
This snap came from Syaoran, who had broken another twig in pure anger. His fists were clenched hard as he glared at the rather cute looking couple in the pathway.
" He should've just asked her and got out of the way. Why is he doing all this cutesy stuff?" Syaoran growled.
Eriol stared at him and then snickered. " You're really falling for the Victim of The Ultimate, Gruesome, Emotional Which Makes It All The Funnier Plan, aren't you?"
" No I'm not!"
" Face it, ultimate plan's victim lover-" Eriol halted, his brows crunching up in confusion. " Waiit..I just said it...yah, you love Sakura!"
" I love you, Sakura!" Hiiro said, hearing the last two words of Eriol's statement.
Sakura leaped away from Hiiro in shock. " Wh-what?"
" Please go with me to the dance. Please!" Hiiro pleaded.
Sakura now seemed like she wanted to be anywhere but there. " Look, I have to go. See you tomorrow, Hiiro-"
Hiiro caught her hand, pure Hollywood style. " Don't leave without saying goodbye!" Hiiro tugged her to his chest and whispered, " Tell me your answer in the next week. Don't leave my heart hanging."
With that he whirled her away and turned away, his shoulders heaving with what looked like raw emotion. He waved his hand out and whispered, " Go. Go before I change my mind and won't ever let you go!"
Sakura ran off down the pathway, after shooting him one more confused glance. Once she was out of sight, Eriol struggled out of the bush, his eyes wide.
" Where did you learn THAT!!" Eriol cried. " That was skills!"
Hiiro brushed off his arms. " Yah, that was the speech I made for all six of my other girlfriends, while I was going out with Mei Huin."
Eriol looked awed. " You are my new idol."
" I thought it was Whitney Houston?" Hiiro asked confusedly.
" It was. Before you came along!" Eriol said, smiling at Hiiro adoringly.
Hiiro stared at him for five minutes before his eyes widened and he held up his hands. " Oh no! I don't walk down that road, my man, nope!"
Eriol gave him a look. " I got a girlfriend."
Hiiro looked him up and down. " Is that a code name or something-" Hiiro looked over at Syaoran, who was brushing leaves off his shirt and his eyes widened. " Ohhhh! Oh! Oh!"
" Oh, what?" Syaoran asked, irritably, then he saw how Hiiro's eyes were flitting between Syaoran and Eriol.
" Oh no. Oh no, you can't be thinking-" Eriol started.
" We are so not-" Syaoran started.
Hiiro was holding up a hand. " I have nothing against homosexuals. You two should be proud!" He held up his fist in a power solute and walked away.
" WE'RE NOT GAY!!!" Eriol and Syaoran shouted after him.
Well, that shows you some of the idiots in this story. Mischievous Love seems to be filled with rather...dumb people. But as you may know, the chapter is ending! Sadly, you can't see if Hiiro won Sakura over, or what the Ultimate Plan really is or if Syaoran and Sakura will ever get anything on!!
But you may see it on the next chapter of Mischievous Love!!
a/n: HEY! Wat up, guys? This is the next chapter, and I'm slowly drawing the humour out of it and slooowly putting in romance. Is it working????
Yah I know. I struggle.
Review, ya guys!! Tell me what ya think, suggestions! SUGGESTIONS ARE GREATLY NEEDED!
I luv ya'll!
see ya latez,
*starjade*
