Past and Future by Hitokiri-san

A/N: I ain't that slow, am I? Only half a month to update! (shields my ears from thunderous boos and curses) My pathetic excuse for a reason is that school has decided I have too much time to dream about marrying Kenshin, and so set more tests in attempt to quench it. Not effective, though. I confess that I still want to marry Kenshin, no matter what!

Ch 18 The cost of interrogation

Oblivion-fogged hazel eyes stretched lazily open, after an agonizing period of lapse. Takehashi blinked once - sluggishly as if he was a frog newly waking from the year's hibernation. A number of objects, he discovered immediately, were positioned there to meet his eyes...

The face-up position he was in gave him an invariable opportunity to observe the uppermost layer of the building...

A wooden, square-patterned ceiling.

His sight fell on a bend curving the ceiling towards a vertical position...

A beam, connecting the ceiling to the floor.

Attached to the beam was a tall, lanky man with narrowed amber eyes; taking a drag from a whitish tube.

A wolf.

Wait. A wolf? All alarm sirens began to wail in Takehashi's head, and that was when his mind woke up with a virtual squeal, bewildered by the mental sirens going off all at once. And that was not any wolf, for Kami's sake, but the notorious Shinsengumi Third Troop Gumi-chou; the fiercest wolf in the whole Shinsengumi, if not the best! Takehashi began wondering fuzzily about his lack of luck in these few days – and decided that Himura Battousai was responsible for that.

The wolf's name, officially, was Saitou Hajime; and he was looking down on the spymaster with a mixture of bemused contemplation and predatory coolness. The two expressions, however, had combined to set Saitou's hard, razor-sharp features into an emotionless one. Takehashi tensed ever so slightly – he hated it when Saitou was thinking, partly because the Miburo was ten times more dangerous that way; and partly because the Ishin spy could always imagine him cooking up new combat strategies, new patrol schedules that could cause the whole Choshu han to capsize altogether.

"Sai-Sai...tou-san." The Ishin addressed Saitou rather groggily, noting that his mind seemed to be malfunctioning, in a way. He was having problems getting his bearings straight and concentrating on an object for a short while made his head hurt. Takehashi cursed whatever being that made him think of putting poison into his darts - not just any poison, either, but the kind of snake poison that could kill a person in less than twenty minutes. Luckily or unluckily, that was when Saitou chose to mention it.

"Thank Kami you're alive, ahou. Another five minutes, and you'd be in merry hell with a bunch of your comrades."

As if I don't know that. The spy scoffed – mentally – while physically too weak to offer any response. He closed his eyes again; trying to piece his mind together. However disoriented, he secretly understood that the third troop captain wanted something with him. Saitou Hajime, as most had known, simply did not have enough compassion to look after fallen inferiors – at least that was what they thought.

Maintaining a look of confused fear, the spy observed the Shinsengumi captain through half-lidded eyes. His thoughts wandered to Himura then – the Himuras, actually – and he hoped that for once the two thickskulled redheads wouldn't mess things up badly. He was astounded by the Battousai's simplicity, at first; Takehashi had never believed the hitokiri to be a demon driven by nothing but bloodlust, that he was to be considered something close to a monster. He had snorted at those superficial assumptions; believing, instead, that Battousai was a fascinating creature – one of insanity and cold-heartedness, yet having the complex wisdom to override madness; Bloodthirsty, yet never succumbing only to instincts: every action of his involved calculating opportunities and risks. After all, he knew Katsura-san – the man would never entrust the whole Choshu han to a ruthless man with no brains. If Himura merely operated on brute force alone, then only Kami would know where the hell this hitokiri was leading the Ishinshishi to.

But then, his theory was recently proven wrong. Himura Battousai met both of the above assumptions, yet he did not. He was simplicity and complexity etched together – simple, in the way that he held his ideal future above all else, ruthlessly paving the path to a new era, however far away; complex, in all his inner turmoil, his double character of childishness and deadly hitokiri senses; in his reluctance to kill, his denial of blood and death; belying the lethal, vicious art in his possession.

Takehashi was curious. Laughing at the Battousai's apparent clumsiness, but nonetheless curious about his contradictory character. Katsura-san had always been elusive about the boy; there had always been some emotions tugging silently at his voice whenever he spoke the hitokiri's name. Was it guilt? Remorse? Care, or doubtfulness? The spymaster was pretty sure that all above had been included.

A sudden stench of tobacco invading his nostrils reminded him of the other occupant in the room. Saitou had been silent, allowing the spy to brood on Himura on the while. Takehashi steeled his mind, quitting his contemplation on Himura as he focused on dealing with the wolf at hand. A combat of wits and feigning, then.

He was sure he couldn't beat Saitou in any kind of duel with any kind of weapon. But in a duel of pretense, he was positive Saitou wouldn't get the best of him.

Saitou went a few steps closer to the futon, his silhouette positively looming over Takehashi; a slight, oh-so-familiar wolfish smile curled at his lips.

"Tell me, boy – he who hurt you, is he worth my time?"


"...Kenkaku-san?"

Kenshin straightened his back as his mind finally registered that it actually referred to him. He wondered how many times Okita had repeated that in order to get his attention.

"Hai?" The rurouni turned violet inquiry at the Shinsengumi captain, his mind noting the momentary, subtle spike in Okita's ki. The young gumi-chou had noted his absence of mind, and had thought something on it. This made him uneasy. Very uneasy.

"Anou...kenkaku-san," Okita's cheerful smile erupted in full force again as he walked alongside the rurouni, who previously didn't really have a clue as to where he was going; his mind was somewhere else, delved too far away to pay actual attention. His plan, as for now, was to get to his younger counterpart as soon as possible before the hitokiri could further damage himself. Kenshin peered over at the beaming captain, slightly frowning. Unfortunately, Okita proved to be a big hindrance to his plan.

He'd have to dump Okita behind without arousing the fellow swordsman's suspicions.

The next part of Souji's sentence, though, caused his train of thought to fly out of the rail and crash its way downhill altogether.

"As an apology for today's misunderstanding, I'd like to offer you my companionship while you search for your other friend. To avoid any more misunderstandings with other patrolling Shinsengumi groups, I hope." He winked at the redhead, his excessively jolly expression belying the formal wordings. Inwardly, Okita observed the stranger's reaction with rapt attention. This would be the last temptation, a good chance to let the stranger err. Kenshin's explanation to his fleeing from Okita was reasonable, in a way; in the other, Souji was not sure he trusted the rurouni that much. If he had a chance to see with his eyes what the "second companion" of the stranger was about, it might help him to decide whether he had faith in the minute redhead. Or, more possibly, not.

For a moment, crinkling charcoal and abyssal violet stared at each other, one testing for a reaction, the other smart enough not to offer any, except for a thoughtful little look.

Smart as it was, it would be exceptionally weird –and yes, impolite - if someone asked you a question and you just stared blankly back as though the asker had spouted an extra limb or two. Kenshin learnt that pretty quickly.

Kenshin breathed, the mildly pleasant rurouni mask firmly in place. Answer yes, or no? If he answered no, it didn't seem as if Okita would leave him alone, anyway. He knew, too well, that Okita Souji hadn't a single intention to let him be right now. Answering yes was downright crazy. Okita and Battousai meeting prematurely was almost the worst scenario he could think of, provided that Battousai was...was...the rurouni didn't want to perceive the state his younger self was in. There would be a time when he must brace himself for that – but now, it would be too much. Distracting. Overwhelming. He couldn't afford to do that right now, when he already had the Shinsengumi captain breathing down his neck.

Okita was prepared to wait the night out for the rurouni's answer when an intruder dismissed both Kenshin from his answering and Okita from his probing.

"OKITA GUMI-CHOU!"

The scrunched black eyes let go of their agreeable façade, if only for a moment; diverted, instead, to meet the one that he could instantly recognize as one of his men.

Kenshin could feel the newcomer silencing abruptly at one look on his gumi-chou's face. Okita had his back to him, his features out of sight; but the rurouni could easily imagine his former nemesis's expression as of now.

"What is the matter, Sengaki?" Souji voice held no trace of the gnawing frustration he felt at the time. Keep his temper in perfect check, he had reminded himself over all these years. The lesson had been well learnt, an imprinted reminder on his soul for the rest of his short life. It wasn't going to change now.

"Anou..." the man began. Then, encouraged by a little nod from his captain, went nearer to deliver the message into Okita's ear.

Himura watched, temporarily forgotten, as Okita frowned marginally at the spoken message. Observed with a slight tensing of his shoulder as the cheerful, easy-going face wiped itself of outlying emotions. Curious, indeed, how the young captain would betray his thoughts by showing no emotion at all, rather than the contrary.

That blank look in itself suggested to him that he was healed of his current trouble. Okita had, in one way or the other, been distracted from his untimely interest with him – he hoped.

Okita turned back to his redheaded companion with an intensity that Kenshin couldn't just describe at the moment. The thin frame before him told of suspicion and anticipation, of doubts and urgency...yet the ex-hitokiri had no idea what had been the cause. His eyes flitted to Sengaki, who was eyeing him with an openly accusing look. Kenshin's hand instinctively dropped to the hilt of his sakabatou at that expression.

"Is that it?" Okita's quiet inquiry had Himura's nerve on end. What it was, and whether it was or was not, was beyond his ability to answer. So he responded with an equally blank look as Okita's, and an involuntary blink.

The Ichibantai gumi-chou sent him a long, searching look; before turning on his heels and striding quickly in the opposite direction, his inferior trailing behind like a silent shadow. Remembering something, he halted in his steps; tossing a minute object backwards in Kenshin's general direction.

"I would like you to keep this, kenkaku-san. Until we meet again." With that, he continued on his way, face set in the same tensely empty expression as before.

Which left a totally bewildered rurouni standing stunned in his wake, staring down at what he recognized as a Japanese chess piece bearing a distinctive symbol – which he quickly identified as the same one marking Saitou's medicine box when he had come along the dojo, in the disguise of a medicine seller.

The symbol of a Shinsengumi.

He pocketed it, snapping out of his reminiscing trance with a snap. He had better things to do at the moment than silly memory-replaying, he told himself.

He made a dash in another direction, where he knew his past and future were now playing chaos in the hand of a boy called Himura Battousai.


Chaos, that was the word.

The aforementioned boy squatted, inspected what happened to be part of a ribcage – clinging with severed muscles and softer tissues – with a distinctly apprehensive look on the stark, beautiful face. Wasn't that he felt anything. Or, he did feel something, if hollowness could be counted as a feeling. It was just that – he couldn't feel any normal feelings anymore. It was even worse than his former mixture of extreme savageness - derived from the shock of being so blatantly betrayed for the first time, and by the hand of someone he was so bent on protecting – gentler misery, and the crazed feeling of total lost and abandonment. Like a scapegoat in its wicked wanderings.

It had always been like this – when he couldn't feel anything at all, it meant that one small part of his soul had died. Again. The horror had become so intense that his spirit had plainly frozen, numbed by the injury; and died, little by little. Sometimes he was just a walking puppet, living on the Choshu's order. Nothing more, nothing less.

Time died. Reason died. Emotion died.

His heart was struggling to maintain its ungainly beating. Failing in its attempt. The blood loss was devastating to his body, and more was still gushing out while he was in this stationary position. Frankly said, his life would be in serious danger even if he had treated the wounds instantly. With his recent abandonment of it, it was getting even worse.

He paid it no heed.

And when the all-too-familiar presence approached him from afar, his soul was already too lost in the bloodshed to recognize.


A/N: Sorry for all those readers who is under the impression that Battousai has "gone crazy without reason." My point is, Battousai doesn't just go crazy and start chopping random people up. It was Matsukaze's betrayal that shocked him to the core. Matsukaze was, in his eyes, a younger voice of innocence and dependence; and though Battousai had been gruff with him he had wished to protect him. His final plot against Battousai (and plotting on his life, also!) was a spiritual wound to the teenage assassin. His emotions surged immediately with anger, confusion, and extreme hurt...so he seemed like a cornered animal, having the impression that the while world was against him. This is the cause for his "craziness".

Nekotsuki: Oh! I just noticed that you are the same person who wrote Tanabata Jasmine. Dense, am I? (smiles) and yeah, you said that you won't be able to update as frequently as usual, if I remember correctly (something about starting a course?) Real life does want all your attention, ne?

Ms Zeal: Um, I guess you're right. After all, Hiko hasn't seen his baka deishi in ages, so maybe that'd work. Same technique: pose Kenshin as Battousai. Ah, and about Battousai's bloodthirsty persona thing, I realized a lot of readers got lost...so I have to add that long, long paragraph in. Okita vs Kenshin? Unfortunately, I have the same little idea that Okita would be beaten to the ground, and that won't be cool. So...Okita went off! Not for no reason, but hey!

XZig-zagX: Bloodlust usually derives from reading too much RK...so much for being a psycho. I think we, action people, are regular night-prowling blood-craving vampires (yeah, talk about Halloween) Been enjoying your Amber Eyed Angel, though a bit lazy to review...gomen!

BakaBokken: I guess my writing after the writer's block is a bit...psychologically off. Insane, if you want to put it simply. Which isn't necessarily a bad thing, as our comrade ESP has said, "I don't like my heroes sane." Hehehe. And when are you going to update your story?

Night-Owl123: Sorry for the slow update! I aort of found that my update speed is decreasing over time...sigh...alas for real life!

Hikari Tsuki Chi: Oops. Battousai's not necessarily "going crazy"...I guess you can better put it traumatized. And Kenshin is in for psychological depression, that's for sure. This mess, as you said, is definitely not going to straighten out nicely; but whether or not Kenshin's future is affected...hey, confidential information!

PhoebeOtaku: More free time than usual? Mine is the contrary. I'd most likely failed Economics today...whew, all about GDP and GNP and stuff that I have no minimum understanding of. I'm glad you like the story. This chapter has more Okita-Kenshin interactions, by the way!

Megume: Mmmm, I've almost forgotten what chapter 8 is about (talk about planning my story) okay, entrance into the Bakumatsu. To say the truth, I rather dislike that part (smirk)

Jupiter's Light: Oh, so you're on chapter 8 too...thanks for reading! I hope this story continues to pique your curiosity.

Barbara Arvardan: Read it in a single breath? Jeez...that must take hours. I've grown so tired of reading my earlier work over and over again, so that I could correct the grammatical mistakes I made somewhere in 2003...thanks for your compliment! I really need it.