Chapter 7
All I have been living for is gone...
"So, you said no to what Jamal proposed you, Mony?" Kathleen asked the little angel that day in the afternoon when the demon left their 'boss' office.
"You wouldn't think I'd say yes, would you?" the angel replied in a matching sarcastic tone. "I'm not interested in your deals, Kathleen, I told you so..."
"Well, well, you did do what I told you to..." the demon said taking a seat on the corner of Monica's desk, not allowing her to continue with what she was doing.
"You know why I did it, to spare Andrew's life, and you can be proud now. I'm hurting and so is he. You've done our lives miserable..." she added with such a painful tone and a cold gaze that would have hurt any other being but a demon.
Kathleen laughed quietly. "Yes, I'm proud of you too, dear," she took the angel's hand but Monica freed herself immediately. "Whatever you told him, it certainly hurt him. I saw him today at the diner. What a pitiful expression he had! Not even sweet Deborah could cheer him up!"
Monica turned away so Kathleen couldn't see her face, and closed her eyes to fight back the tears she so wanted to cry. "Help me, Father..." she murmured quietly.
"I'm sure you said the same thing to know what to tell him to go away, didn't you? He heard you, Mony... Now just pray for Deborah not to do her job..."
The Irish angel turned quickly, fear reflected on her eyes and her heart beating wildly. "Deborah? Why? NO!" Kathleen nodded. "Is she one of you!"
The female demon smiled broadly. "With such a pretty face you'd swear she's an angel, right? She can even deceive an angel! Specially an angel in such a state of mind..."
"I told you to leave him alone! He has nothing to do with this assignment or with Jamal's deal with the Devil!" Monica exclaimed in a panicked voice.
"See, little angel? This has nothing to do with 'our' business," the demon said. "But a soul like Andrew's is highly tempting for us... and you know how we work! We take advantage of your biggest weaknesses! We almost had you once, don't you remember? Your heart was broken then; Andrew's broken now! This isn't a chance we're missing so easily..."
"Kathleen, please!" Monica asked. She would beg if necessary, but he had to be safe... "This is between you and me! Leave him!"
"This is all up to Andrew, dear," the demon stroked her hair. "If he falls into Deborah's game... and if he kisses her..." and left Monica standing behind her desk, shaking with renewed fear.
As hard as she tried, Monica couldn't take Kathleen's new menaces out of her mind. What could she do now to warn Andrew without placing him in a higher risk? She was thinking about that when she went to Jamal's office to search for the last year budget so she could compare it with the current one. The man had told her it was on the upper drawer behind his desk, so she was there, on her knees, with a pile of yellow folders at a side, half reading the labels on them, half thinking again and again about a certain blond angel.
"Gosh..." she couldn't help but exclaim when she placed a new folder at the top of the pile and all fell and got scattered around. She started to collect them and place them back on the drawer, and only when she picked up the last ones she noticed a blue envelope that had fallen to the floor. The beautiful handwriting that read "To Jamal" on it called her attention, and even if she doubted first, she took out the two pages inside and started to read the same elegant penmanship.
"Jamal,
I wish there was an easy way to say this, but there isn't. I know I'm going to hurt you, but I want you to remember this is hurting me twice more..."
"Just what do you think you're reading, Monica!" Jamal's voice made the little angel jump out of her skin.
"Oh, I... I..."
In two long strides the man was by the angel's side and grabbed the letter. "This is no one of your business, you hear me! This is part of a past I have left behind and I don't want any of my employees to dig on it!"
"Who was Sheila, Jamal?" Monica offered softly.
"No one you can get interested on..."
"She loved you, she said so..."
Jamal took Monica's arm and shook her, the little angel wincing with pain. "You, women lie! You say you love us but that's not true! Don't you think she told me all that I'm sure you've told your boyfriend? 'You're my life, you are my everything'... and you have sent him straight to hell! For sure he is now mourning and you're here reading someone's else secrets!"
"I'm sorry... I didn't mean to..." the angel said, her eyes shining with tears. He couldn't know how certain his words were in respect to her and Andrew...
For a long second, Jamal met Monica's eyes and the true fear he saw in them moved him at the end. He released her and murmured an "I'm sorry".
Monica closed the drawer, took the folder she had come to look and started to walk out of the office, but before she reached the door, she turned to see her 'boss' again. "Jamal... did you ever really try to find out the truth? About her reasons to..."
Jamal looked at his assistant, the expression on his face telling everything Monica needed to know...
The last thing Monica needed on a day like that was to pass by the café and see Andrew talking to Deborah again. But there he was. Or there they were. He was seating by the window and she was standing at his side, the menus totally forgotten as one of her hands was covering her mouth and the other was circling her waist for she was laughing like crazy. Andrew was smiling too. Not laughing, but smiling. Yet his eyes showed the deep bone sadness to the one who knew how to read on them, to the angel that meant the world for him...
"If he falls into Deborah's game..." Kathleen's words were so present in her mind that Monica didn't think it twice before pushing the door open and take a seat right across where Andrew was seating. He noticed her presence immediately as his eyes were fixed on her, only occasionally turning to Deborah more for the mere courtesy. Another waitress came near to her to offer the menu but she asked for a coffee.
And Andrew would have noticed her presence no matter what. He so missed her! He had lost everything in hours... his job as an angel and the being he loved the most. He so wanted to run to her and hold her tight, to not let her go anymore, to kiss her and make her forget anything but his love for her. It was almost a physical ache for him not to go closer to her...
And Monica was feeling the same. She so wanted to forget about Kathleen and Gregory and Jamal! But she couldn't. Instead she examined Deborah carefully from head to toes... yes, she was indeed beautiful, but so she was dangerous and Andrew was right where the demons wanted him to be. She had to find a way to take him away from her, but how? She looked down to the table and her gaze caught in her hand: the ring Andrew had given her for Valentine's. It would be so painful to give it up; it meant so much for her... She took it out and walked to his table. "Excuse me," she said and Deborah shot her a nasty glance. "Andrew... can I have a word with you?"
The blond angel turned to see Deborah, who understood what he was asking. "I... hum..." she picked up her menus, "I'll be back later."
Both angels waited until she was gone and only then did Andrew speak. "Now what do you want, Monica?" he said with a very upset tone. "You were very clear when you said you didn't want to see me again. Did you think it twice and now you regret your words?"
The Irish angel felt how tears were stinging in her eyes for she didn't know what was worse: being away from him or hear the bitterness in his words. "Please, Andrew, that's not fair..."
"Fair! You want me to be fair!" he yelled and lowered her voice when half of the customers turned to see them. Monica was still standing by the table and he felt suddenly sorry for her. "Sit down," he ordered her. Once she was sitting, he continued, "Don't come to me with what is fair or not, Monica, 'cause what you did to me certainly isn't!"
"If you only knew..." Monica murmured not able to meet his eyes.
"Then tell me!" he raised his voice again, grasping her hand until it was almost painful for her.
The Irish angel raised her face and only then could read the desperation in Andrew's eyes. She couldn't tell him anything, not yet... Doing the biggest effort of her life, she freed her hand and stood up. "I can't!" she said now in a high voice too. "I just wanted to give you this back..."
Andrew saw the ring and couldn't believe it. "It's yours. I don't want it back..."
"I can't keep it. It doesn't feel right. Here you have," she let the ring in front of his hands. "That's all I needed to tell you." She then walked to her table, dropped some coins to pay for the coffee she ordered and left.
He couldn't let her go so easily. He left a bill too, took the ring and went after her. "Monica, wait!" he said but the little angel practically ran away. He followed her along the street until she crossed by the corner to a park. Being taller and faster than her, he reached her and took her by the arm. "Wait! We need to talk!"
"Let me go, Andrew!" she fought.
"No! You are not going anywhere!" he shouted grabbing both her arms and shaking her. "I can't believe what you are doing! You and I were blessed with our love! It was the most special gift we could have ever had and you are giving it away! It's not only yours to decide you know? I have something to say here too!"
"You don't understand, Andrew, you don't understand!" she sobbed.
"That's true! I don't understand it! I can't understand you want to give up what we've had together, what we've shared! How many angels have had this chance, tell me! How many times had you felt this way! Why are you doing this!"
"I have reasons, Andrew!"
"Reasons that I can't accept! You mean so much to me, baby!" he cupped her face forcing her to see him through teary eyes. "Monica, you can't possibly know how much I love you, sweetie! You are my world..." he started to kiss her face and then pulled her into a tight hug. "You are the reason of my everyday... Without you... all I have been living for is gone..."
Monica felt how her resistance was receding with Andrew's caresses. It had been less than twenty four hours but she had missed and needed him every second. Nowhere but in his arms she could feel herself strong enough to carry on with this assignment... Yet, barely a couple of seconds later, she tried to pull away. "Andrew, please, let me go..."
"No!" he shouted cupping her face and steadying her. He had to fight for her. He needed her and wasn't willing to let her go. "No, Monica, no, don't go..."
"Let me go, please..." she took his wrists trying to make him free her.
"I said no!" he shouted and taking her by surprise, he pulled her over for a long, deep kiss.
