Amme: HI people! We're BAAAAAAAAAAAAACK!
Kish and Ichigo: We CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRREEEE!
Lynnia: I KNEW YOU WOULD KK!
Lynnia glomps Kish's arm.
Ichigo: Get off of him now!
Lynnia: MAKE ME!
Ichigo: I'LL SHOW YOU!
Ichigo and Lynnia get into a BIG catfight.
Amme: Awww, isn't that cute? They're finally playing together!
Kish: Shouldn't we break that up?
Amme: Naw, I figure they'll tire themselves out in about three minutes. All we gotta do is wait.
Kish and Amme sit down and wait three HOURS for Ichigo and Lynnia to get tired.
Amme: That's nice. Now, we got reviews!
Runaway Kid—You're on a sugar-high aren't you? NO MORE PIXIE STIX FOR YOU! HAHAHAHAHA:D
Mew Purin—YAY! I'ma use that this chapter! HAHAHAHAHAHA! Thanks for the idea! We'll fit you in in some chapter... somewhere... sometime... someplace... somewhen... somehow... someday... someone... somewhat... ((starts singing very badly)) SOMEWHERE, OUT THERE! BEYOND THE SOMETHING SOMETHING SOMETHING!
Ichigo: Somewhen? That's not even a real word!
Lynnia: I don't care.
Kish: And we're all SO proud of you for that.
Lynnia: I KNOW! I'M SO PROUD OF ME FOR NOT CARING!
Amme: Whatever.
((A/N: I have to do Mew Satou first, because of a favor, but I'll do you next!))
Someone—Okay, FINE. I'll kill Masaya in this chapter too! Just for you!
SailorKagome—That's cool. Thanks for the review!
Sweet Tooth—Awwww, looks like someone is on a sugar-high! And just between you, me and Lynnia who doesn't really care—((whispering)) We sold Taruto's pigtails on EBay last night while he was asleep. HAVE A COOKIE!
CutiePie07—WOW-O! YOU REVIEWED LIKE A GAZABILLLION TIMES!
Ichigo: She reviewed twice.
Amme: Same thing.
hm—EVERYONE LOVES KISH!
Masaya: EVEN I LOVE KISH!
Ichigo: Dude, I didn't know you rolled like that! That's disturbingly funny.
Someone—Oh, someone's gonna die, but not until the last chapter…. Haha ha!
Retasu—THE Retasu? As in—the REVIEWER Retasu? WOW! The last time I tried to buy the rabbit some Trix Lynnia ate them, mistaking them for sporks.
Lynnia: YOU PROMISED YOU'D NEVER TELL!
Amme: I know, but I lied.
Mew Satou—Your friend told ya right! Cause I'M THE BEST! n.n
Megan—It's alright to send it to your imaginary friends, too! They're the ones who gave us the idea!
KUTESTAZINEVER—My caps lock gets stuck all the time, it's nothing to worry about!
RunawayKid(Again!)—Uh…. Zitto Bitto!
Kitty Help—Thanks a lot! I'm going as fast as I can! n.n
light and death angel—Thanks light angel! How's it hangin', death?
Hidden ice nin—He wouldn't have done anything anyways, and Ryou…. He talked about money! (For your other review, I'll put a whole chapter about Pai in there somewhere, okays?)
count-hide—((ICE!)) n.n
You'll never know….—Yay! I love getting these reviews! I'll try to go faster!
Kawaii Plushie Fetish—I get along with Minto because we're both sarcastic!
ChristianGal—Eh, the funnier ones come and go. Perrsonally I think the next chapter after this one will be funnier!
Angelic Ichigo—That might be a good idea!
White Tiger Mew—Yay! I thought I was the only one who cries with laughter! Thanks!
Kat—Why, thanks! Did you read Kishing Bunch as the other one? That's a pretty funny one! n.n
ichigo nya 3—I'm updating!
-SohmaShiroganeInuYasha-Fangirl—Lynnia takes those as the most high and respected compliments! ((Lynnia nods))
EVILISHpunkPRINCESShorsesj—Wow, cool name! And YES Masaya is that bad! Lol.
LazerWulf—((Amme looks at watch nervously)) Oh! Would you look at the time! I just remembered, I got a ...uh...banana... In the…. The time machine. Yeah…. The time machine…. ((Amme turns to Lynnia)) Lynnia, I have a BIG GIRL job for you.
Lynnia: OH MY GOSH! A BIG GIRL JOB? HOW SHOULD I BREATHE? HOW SHOULD I THINK? THIS IS TOO SUDDEN! NEVER!
Amme: LYNNIA! I just need you to answer the rest of these reviews!
Lynnia: Oh! Okay then!
Kish: ((whispering to Amme)) But this is the last review!
Amme sends her just-now-made-and-already-copy-written famous DEATH GLARE towards Kish.
Kish: Oh! I mean, uh, LOOK! More reviews! ((laughs nervously))
There are suddenly three more reviews while Amme runs away REALLY REALLY fast.
Okay, the REAL LazerWulf: ((Lynnia tries to act all technical and puts on geeky looking glasses to prove said technicality)) Well, my dear beta-reader, There is a GREAT DEAL of difference between the amount of stupid humor a boy can handle and the amount of stupid humor a GIRL can handle. There is! Honestly! What? You don't believe me? I'M SO UNLOVED!
Lynnia runs off crying so we don't have to go through Kish's reviews! Amme comes running back for a millisecond.
Amme: And we have a guest today! It's Mew Satou! She'll be locked in there with us for this chapter!
CHAPTER THREE: Truth or Truth! And A Stolen Laptop?
"Okay, we're all done with our telling our secrets. Now what?" Ryou asked.
"Now, you're going to forget everything you were told about muffin making..." Lynnia yelled. She ran around the room yelling out very stupid things that she probably stole from some bum she met on the street and started dating but was secretly cheating on him with her orange friend the Blue Thing.
Ichigo sadly shakes her head.
"Right now we're going to switch bodies with other peoples...and then we're gonna bake cookies and eat...brains of...bread...from a CD...that's of Amme singing...and she'll be biting the microphone and her agent at the same time whilst singing!" Carl said.
"What?" Minto asked, confuzzled.
BEEP!
"OH NO!" Amme screams. "I FORGOT ABOUT MEW SATOU!"
"About who now?" Retasu asks. Amme types something in her computer when Mew Satou pops up out of nowhere. She's carrying a big wooden bat.
"DIE MASAYA!" She shouts, running towards the hentai baka. Masaya watches her until she's real close to her then speaks.
"You're cute."
"EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW EW! MASAYA GERMS! I'M CONTAMINATED! SOMEONE KILL ME!" She shouts, flailing around helplessly. "GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF! GET IT OFF!"
Kish moans.
"It's going to be one of THOSE days…."
Amme types something in her computer and everyone (save Carl) gets a shot in their arm.
"OWWW!" Someone shouts.
"Shut up, ya big wuss." That orange fuzzy soft pillow-like fish/human says.
"Can I kill him now!" That one guest-girl wines. "Please please please please please please please?"
"NO!" Everyone shouts.
"YES!" Lynnia shouts.
"Okay," Amme said.
"Now," Carl said. "We're playing Truth and Truth. Everyone is asked two questions by one other person and they have to tell the truth."
"And just to make sure you all DID tell the truth, we've injected all of us with a truth serum!" Amme says, slapping her hand over her mouth in a quick thunder-like fashion.
"Thunder doesn't make a sound." Pai says. Everyone looks at him.
"IT TALKED!" Satou said, getting in Pai's face and examining him closely. "What else can you say? Can you say 'I'm a big fat alien who can only count numbers.'?"
"Boy, is she stupid!" Keiichiro chirps happily. "OMG did I say that out loud?"
"This is pointless, and I wanna go home to my Café! Think of all the money I'm losing! THE MONEY!" Ryou shouts.
"I'll go first…." Amme speaks. "Hmmm…. Keiichiro. Question one: What's your worst fear?"
"I fear nothing! Except for little mice and cockroaches. And pillows and clouds and stuffed animals and hairbrushes and plastic plates and televisions and CD players and plastic cups and…."
"BOO!" Satou screams behind Keiichiro. She waves her arms in the air wildly.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Keiichiro screams, toppling over onto the floor. He passed out.
"My next question is: Why do you act so happy all the time?" Amme asks. Keiichiro can't hear her because of the loud buzzing in Satou's head that is disturbing everyone in New York to the point of suicide, but no one's killing anyone!
"My turn!" Taruto screams. "Satou, who do you like?"
"NOT MASAYA! DIE!" Satou finds a toothpick encrusted knife and tries to plunge it into Masaya's eye.
"NEVER!" Ichigo shouts, tackling Satou. A big fight happens, Satou being the winner by bringing out a paper dog her imaginary friend's sister bought for her 1/4 birthday, just last year!
"What?" Kish asks, all confused.
"Boing!"
"Ring-ring!"
"Hello?"
"NOT ME IDIOT, THE BLONDE!"
"MONEY!"
"Why's everyone shouting?"
"WE DON'T KNOW!"
Amme seemed to have had enough of all the excitement, and stood up.
"FREE BEER!" She shouted. Everyone became silent. She sat back down.
"Hmmm…. MY TURN!" Minto flew into the ceiling with her legs first, so that means she was flying upside down? Whatever. All she cared about is it was her turn and all the little people would pay attention to her until the end of the gloriously purple-reddish page.
"AMME!" She pointed an accusing, pointing, bleeding, melting, good-smelling nail at the All-Powerful-Authoress. "What get you the maddest?"
"My Star Wars game." Amme answered, picking up an anonymous controller and playing on the invisible, turned-off TV that had her game on it. "THE PEOPLE DON'T KNOW WHAT STAYING PUT IS! DIE!"
"Alrighty then… what in your life made you decide to become an All-Powerful-Authoress?"
"It was the golden millennium of 2004. I had already begun my process as a Powerful-Authoress, with just writing for my own pleasure and to mess with Lynnia. Wait, WHERE ARE LYNNIA AND SATOU?"
Lynnia and Satou appeared on both sides of the cool Authoress with Sherlock Holmes clothing on, and Lynnia was holding a violin soaked in the sweet, sweet sugar of water oranges when Satou shoved a HUGE magnifying glass in Ichigo's face.
"The QUESTION is! My dear All-Powerful-Authoress, Where is THE LAPTOP?"
Everyone looked around, and the laptop was missing! Keiichiro, who had just woken up hungry, took a bite out of Masaya's diseased arm and fell back asleep.
Masaya, with a big hold in his arm, ran around the room screaming that his arm was bitten off.
Amme threw a hand in the air so forcefully, she threw herself to the ceiling, hitting her head on the padded hard plates of the depths below.
"NEVER FEAR!" She shouted, plummeting back down to the floor. "I HAVE A TRACKING DEVICE IN IT! Now where's my cell phone? Minto, I'll pay you triple if you lend me your cell."
"But, we're not getting paid to sit in this white-padded-dump." Minto thought.
"You're not getting paid to THINK! I'll pay you quadruple, but NO MORE!" Amme screamed.
"That seems more than fair," Satou nodded her head and smashed Kisshu on the head with a bat. She gasped. "NOO! MY POOR KISSHU! ARE YOU OK? I DIDN'T MEAN TO DO THAT!"
"Done!" Minto handed her cell to Amme, who smirked and started dialing on the phone. Then she put it on speaker so everyone could hear.
"Moshi-Moshi!" The voice started.
"Sahrah!" Amme squealed. "My laptop was stolen. Get onto that All-Powerful-Authoress-In-Training tracking device and FIND IT!"
There was a minute of no sounds but typing. Then there was a gasp.
"AMME-CHAN! MY COMPUTER FROZE! THEN IT SAID 'COMPUTER GONE. AUTHORESS-TAMPERINGVERY YES!'. Someone doesn't want you to find it!"
"Who do you think took it?" Kisshu asked, as everyone huddled together like they were freezing, starving, in-outer-space people who wanted to talk in low-frequency voices so the dolphins in Alaska wouldn't hear that the All-Powerful-Authoress had lost her laptop.
"Let's call role!" Amme said. She looked around the huddle to see two people missing, and one was asleep with Masaya-diseased-arm in his mouth. The other one missing was the one—the ONLY—
THE END!
Amme: Who do you think took it?
Lynnia: I DID IT!
Ichigo: What's with the chuck out of Masaya's arm thing about?
Kisshu: I thought it was kinda cool.
Ichigo: SHUT UP!
Lynnia: Llew, yhw t'nod ew og wehc no delcycer repap s'taht neeb deifirup yb eht suolucarim slerriuqs!
Everyone else: HUHN?
Amme: She's tknlaig brdacwadks!
Kisshu: BEEP BERREEEP! SQUAKKITTY SKWAK QUACK!
Ichigo: Am I the only one here that can talk sanely?
Lynnia: On, fo esruoc ton! Er'uoy ylno gnimaerd!
Kisshu: MEOW NYAN! ROOF BOW-BOW.
Amme: Palsee hlep us! You hvae to rveiw!
Ichigo: Roughly translated, I think she said Please help us, you have to review.
Lynnia: WEIVER! WON!
