A/N: I am sooo sorry for not updating sooner. My old Beta wouldn't give me back the chapter and I was not going to make a fool of myself so now I have two (they couldn't decided who would be my betas). I have the whole story finished I just have to turn them into Mommy Kitty for corrections. She is super fast so I hope to be done by New Years MAX.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of the characters. If I did, well I could be VERY rich. Also I would be married to an alive Sirius...maybe Draco…maybe both! (Nobody has a problem with bigamists…right?)

Dedication: I would not be posting this if it weren't for my best friend, mommy Kitty. LoL you really are the mother out of all of us. . Thank you so much for the story promptly (unlike Bookie Bird I still haven't got it back from her)

I Wanted To Fly

Chapter 4- Live

I do not know how I can stand just sitting around watching Sirius fight for his life. I mean, sure it is his fault that he is laying in the hospital wing instead of outside causing so much trouble with James that I do not want to know about. I want to know how I can look at Sirius without breaking out into tears. Sirius is supposed to be one of my best friends and it is killing me that I can not help him fight. I want him to wake up more then anything I have ever wanted, even the cure of my bite.

I am trying to figure out things to do in the hospital wing. James and I have been sitting here for what is the second day. There is only so much one person can do in a hospital wing. I look next to me, Prongs in sleeping like a little baby. He is all curled up in the chair with dried up tears stuck to his cheeks, which had paled from to few days that he has been cooped up in the hospital wing instead of being outside in the sun. I am probably just as bad.

Tomorrow we have to go back to class, and I do not know how I will be able to sit in a classroom. I have not quite figured out how I am suppose to pay attention to my school work while my best friend is laying in a hospital bed fighting his inner demons to wake up and greet the world. Part of me wants to miss my lessons and just stay here with Sirius, but I know I cannot miss class. Right after class, I plan on doing all the research I need on my homework; then head back here to finish my homework right here in this chair.

Even thought I feet like something is missing, all I need to do is look at James and know I have gotten off easy. James looks as though his own little world was hit with an earthquake on top of a tornado, without Sirius by his side, James is empty. I knew if James and Sirius did not make up something bad would happen, but I would have never guessed that Sirius would have tried to take his own life. Little did Sirius or James know: by Sirius taking his life, he also stole James' as well. I doubt James would even admit it, but I do not need him to say it, because I know James and Sirius could not live without each other, two brothers.

I reach up and feel tears streaming down my face, one after the other. Sirius has to wake up so I can see his bight eyes look at me the way only one of my best friends could look at me. I do not care if he opens his eyes to make fun of Snape or Malfoy. Sirius could do whatever he pleases and I will not even bother to tell him that he should not be doing whatever he is doing. I do not care anymore, not that I ever did; all I want is for him to wake up and call me Moony and for things to be right once again.

I remember last Christmas was one of the greatest times in my life. Sirius, James, and I stared off by opening presents. Peter had gone home to spend Christmas with his family, which Sirius said was better because we did not have to listen to him say how he was hungry. Next, we proudly started an all school snowball fight, followed by dinner in the great hall. The thing I loved most about this day was we all went back to our dormitory and just laid out over James bed and talked of nothing all night. None of us got a wink of sleep. The next morning, seeing as we were already awake, we decided to plot a few pranks for the rest of the break. The best part of the night was how close we were. We kept finishing each others sentences and laughing about how the other was reading their mind.

I do not see how one day could change all that. Sure, Sirius made one oversight and it hurt me more than I could have ever let on, but that could never change how close we once were; how close we are. James seems to believe that all that matters is the fact that he hurt me for the mistake and that made hurt James. I wanted to reach out to Sirius and tell him that I still cared and I understand that he lost his temper, not that I approve, but he is still my friend and the idea of that caused James to go off on me.

Sirius was always one to react on impulse and I never could figure that out. He got caught up in his emotions too easily, and that often led him to trouble. I have a feeling that him tell Snape my secret was one on those times. There are only two things Sirius goes off about: his family tree and if anyone dares pick a fight with any one of his friends. I do not know what happen that night to make Sirius' fuse light and him blow up like a bad prank, but whatever it was, it was not good.

Sirius was always stubborn, that why I knew he would not die. Though nobody knows how he survived the fall, a fall like Sirius took should have killed him. All the professors are baffled by Sirius' remarkable survival. Though that just proves they do not know Sirius as well as I do. I know Sirius could not die without James and him once again as the best friends that they really are. Sirius is just too stubborn to die; he must live for James. He must live for me.


A/N: Please RR and flames will be use to light a fire for James, Sirius, Remus, and I to tell campfire stories under and roast Peter (anybody want BBQ rat?). .