I Hate Mondays
Chapter 3: Tigra
By
The Uncanny R-Man
And
Anything but ordinary
Disclaimer- We don't own anything, all familiar characters belong to Marvel.
Shout Outs-
Jaenelle Angelline- Heh, Hank becoming a daddy, random, non?
Melissarxy1- Correction, the chicks dig the OTHER fuzzy dude. Heck, just ask Anything but ordinary, she's frickin' Hank fangirl!
Showstopper- Oh just you wait 'til you see what he wave planned for Hank and co. MWAHAHAHAHAAA!
SpyOfNabiki- Yup, both Anything but ordinary and I agree with you, hank kicks butt and there isn't enough Beast Fanfic around. More Scott/Jean bashing soon.
Ldypebsaby- Oh just you wait and see how random this day becomes! Heh.
Avengers Mansion-
Tigra's day started as it always did, by her blissful sleep being interrupted by an alarm clock glaring in her ear. Tigra simply grabbed the offending clock and smashed it against the wall before going back to sleep.
Although Tigra was an inactive Avenger at the moment and had a job as a New York cop to attend with, she decided to take a break and visit her old buddies at the mansion. She was received warmly by the Scarlet Witch and She-Hulk, both who were close friends. Captain America however, was a little wary of the weretiger turning up out of the blue, given that in the past she used to flirt furiously with him.
Tigra let out a groan as somebody walked into her room and pulled open the curtains, illuminating her face with sunlight.
'Nuh.' She mumbled with her head under the pillow. 'Don' wanna... sleepy...'
'C'mon Tigra.' She-Hulk said. 'Rise and shine, it's butt whipping time.'
Tigra muttered something explicit underneath the pillow.
'Jarvis is making waffles.' She-Hulk added.
'Ooh, waffles!' Tigra said, sitting up straight. 'C'mon Jen, the sooner we get there, the sooner we can snag the maple syrup!'
She-Hulk just stood there and watched as Tigra sped out of the room.
'Um Tigra, hadn't you better put some clothes on? You're kinda... naked.'
'Oh right, how silly of me.' Tigra blushed slightly. 'Clothes, heh.'
Downstairs-
Tigra and She-Hulk had joined the rest of the Avengers in the dining room for breakfast. Tigra was guzzling down a huge pile of waffles while the other Avengers just watched on in amazement.
'Geez, I never knew Tigra could eat so much.' Hawkeye said.
'At least we know that nothing will go to waste.' Wanda added.
'If only she would let us get a look in.' Hank Pym, aka Ant-Man uh... Giant-Man, no... Yellowjacket... or is it Goliath? said. (1)
'You just eat your oat bran cereal, dear.' Janet Van Dyne replied.
Pym just muttered under his breath and poked at his oats with a spoon.
'I wanted waffles.' He pouted.
'I'll grab you some, High Pockets.' Hawkeye said as he cautiously reached out towards Tigra. Unfortunately, Tigra was aware of this and smacked him on the hand with a spoon.
'No, mine! Or I will help you not!' (2)
Hawkeye just cradled his hand and joined Pym in the pouting.
'Um Tigra.' Wanda said. 'You can share those waffles if you want.'
'Too late for that Wanda.' Captain America replied. 'She's eaten them all.'
A collective groan rose from the assembled Avengers.
'I don't suppose you have any oat bran left do you honey?' Jan asked her ex-husband.
'Oh no.' Pym replied. 'You wanted me to have these oats so I'm gonna eat them.'
Pym dug his spoon into the bowl and shovelled a spoonful of oats into his mouth. He winced at the taste, or lack thereof.
'Mmm, so sweet.'
The other Avengers looked up from their places as Tigra let out a meaty burp.
'BRAAAP! Oh excuse me, better out than in I say.' The weretiger blushed. 'Well thanks for the breakfast guys, I'd better get going, things to see, people to do.'
The Avengers watched at Tigra departed from the room.
'She meant things to do, people to see, right?' Pym asked.
'You can never tell with Tigra.' She-Hulk shrugged.
Salem Centre-
Tigra was in her civilian identity of Greer Grant-Nelson. He feline form was hidden by the magical amulet that she always wore around her neck, kinda like an image inducer but... magic.
She was about to enter a grocery store to buy random foodstuffs when she saw several police cars speeding behind her chasing a carjacker.
'Uch, I'll never be able to buy those Twinkies for Beast now.' She pouted. 'I know how much he loves them.'
Greer ducked into a nearby alley and pressed her amulet, turning her back into Tigra. Tigra then grabbed onto the rungs of a fire escape and clambered upto the roof of the store. Upon reaching the roof, she surveyed her surrounding for signs of the carjacker. Her heightened feline senses soon picked up the sound of sirens and the sight of flashing lights so she sped across the roof in the direction of the chase.
Down on the road, the carjacker was trying to divide his time by keeping his eyes on the road while firing off pot shots to the advancing police. He almost lost control of the car when he heard something leap onto the car.
'Hi, I don't suppose you know the way to San Hose?' Tigra asked, peering through the windshield.
The carjacker let out a girly shriek and fired a few shots at Tigra. Fortunately for Tigra, he missed.
'I could swear that you car thieves get worse at this stuff every time I catch you.' Tigra tutted.
The carjacker just yelled out obscenities and fired off more shots. Unfortunately, several of them hit Tigra, which made her loose her grip on the roof of the car.
'Oh this is gonna suck.' She winced as she finally felt her grip go. She hit the ground with a thump and rolled into a ditch on the side of the road. The carjacker meanwhile, lost control of the car completely and ploughed straight into a nearby tree and was engulfed in an improbable but impressive fireball.
Tigra looked up weakly from the ditch and noticed that she had conveniently landed right outside the Xavier Institute for Higher Learning. She clutched her steadily bleeding bullet wound and limped towards the mansion.
'I haven't got enough time to get to a hospital.' She said to herself. 'There's only one man that can help me now, Hank McCoy!'
Thankfully, the gates to the mansion were open and Tigra limped up the driveway, leaving a steadily increasing trail of blood behind her. When she finally got to the front door, she knocked weakly on the door.
'Come on, come on.' She winced. 'I'm bleeding to death here.'
Tigra was just about to faint from blood loss when the door opened. Tigra fell forwards into the arms of a blonde woman with a face pack and fuzzy bunny slippers. Tigra heard the woman muttering something about bleeding on white leather hot pants before she finally passed out...
TBC...Notes-
(1)- You have to admit that it's damn hard to keep track of what Hank Pym is calling himself nowadays. I think that he's now calling himself Yellowjacket now, right?
(2)- Heh, gratuitous Yoda reference. Yoda references R-Man does like, very humorous they are. Hmm, yes...
