Edonil: I love your reviews! They made me laugh… I love your reactions to Kuja and Garnet walking off. But, well… Here's the next instalment. More author's notes at the end. Oh, and Popgoesthebaldie (and anyone else who was wondering), the reason no one is uncomfortable is because most people don't know. As of the end of chapter two, only Zidane, Dagger, Beatrix, Tantalus, and all those pesky servants from dinner know. But I hear that servants chatter…
Disclaimer: I own nothing but my homework (grr!).
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To Challenge Perfection
Chapter Three: Snogging
Zidane frowned. Stupid Kuja. He'd gone off with Dagger, so Zidane had figured it was his duty to follow them. The two sat around the library, talking about dusty tomes of no relevance to the real world, until Dagger had finally gone off to bed, and Kuja had started walking back to the Tantalus airship. There had been no romance. Normally, Zidane would be elated, but…
If Dagger wasn't falling for someone as inherently awesome as Kuja, what chance did Zidane have?
Kuja was currently walking across the courtyard, looking at a map he'd scrounged up in the library, completely oblivious to the rest of the world. That was probably a good thing; it seemed that everyone knew about his existence before dinner was over. Darn servants; they never kept their mouths shut. Oh well, it was bound to get out sooner or later.
"Halt!" Kuja looked up slightly. Zidane bit his lip. It was Steiner. This could be… interesting.
"Ah, Captain Steiner. A pleasure to see you." Whatever Steiner had been expecting, it hadn't been that.
"You! You filthy, no-good, double-crossing-"
"I beg to differ, Captain Steiner. I am clean, my intentions are pure, and I have never double-crossed you."
"You… You… You double-crossed the queen!"
"May I assume it is the late Queen Brahne you are referring to, and not Queen Garnet til Alexandros XVII?"
"What?" Kuja had completely lost Steiner. Poor bloke.
"I most definitely double-crossed Queen Brahne, although to be fair, she intended to do the same to me. I have never betrayed your current queen, however; actually, we just had a nice chat. She seems like a lovely young lady."
"You… You… You're the other person she was eating with!" Kuja nodded.
"Indeed. I was surprised to see you weren't there, Captain Steiner. I suppose Her Royal Majesty trusts me," he mused, almost to himself.
"You… You…" Steiner was looking a tad angry. Zidane decided to step in- and then he saw Beatrix.
"Beatrix!" he whispered.
"Hmm?"
"Beatrix! Come here!" She obeyed. "Do you want to go rescue Kuja from your boyfriend?"
"Hmm?" Beatrix looked over at Steiner, who was turning purple. "Oh, of course." Walking over to Steiner, she smiled rather seductively and asked, "Darling? Is there a problem?"
"What? Oh, Beatrix… Do you see who's here? Look! It's…"
"Hello, Kuja," Beatrix said, smiling pleasantly. "I trust you're well?"
"Yes, thank you, Lady Beatrix," he replied, giving his annoying but polite little nod. "And yourself?"
"Splendid. Although it seems Adelbert is having trouble breathing." 'Adelbert' was indeed having trouble breathing; apparently he hadn't been expecting Beatrix and Kuja to get along. "Adelbert, Darling, are you alright?"
"Yes… Fine… Beatrix, can I talk to you for a moment?" he asked in a strangled voice.
"Of course. I'll be seeing you, then, Kuja?"
"Indeed, Lady Beatrix. Farewell, Captain Steiner." Smiling politely, Kuja walked off. Zidane would have stayed to see what Beatrix and Steiner did, but he needed to talk to Kuja about something important, so he followed.
((Some time later…))
"Ok, so… You don't like her?" Kuja smiled.
"No, Zidane, you can fall in love with Queen Garnet as much as you wish; I do not like her like that. Are you satisfied?"
"Yeah, I guess… You're sure?" Zidane wouldn't have asked, but… Kuja was so perfect. "No, don't answer that, I know the answer, don't I?"
"Yes, you do. Now, is there anything else you wished to ask me?"
"Well…" Zidane thought for a moment. "If you don't like Dagger, then who do you- HOLY EIDOLONS OF ETERNAL LIGHT!"
"Hmm? What is- Oh!"
Kuja and Zidane had been walking across the courtyard, chatting, thinking they were alone. Apparently they weren't; Steiner and Beatrix were snogging each other senseless nearby.
"What!" Zidane's yell had attracted Steiner's attention. Beatrix looked over at Zidane and Kuja and smiled slightly.
"I'd say we have company, Steiner."
"Company? Company! Beatrix…" Steiner looked scandalized. Zidane laughed. "You! What are you doing here!"
"Walking. Talking. Why do you ask?"
"I… You… He… Wibba… wabba…" Steiner trailed off. Zidane laughed again.
"Well, I'm off. Are you coming, Kuja?"
"I was actually going to go into the city. I was going to meet somebody-"
"Really? Who is it? Is she hot?"
"It's Blank, Zidane. Not a girl." Kuja looked slightly amused. "Contrary to popular belief, I can have friends. I'll be seeing you later then, Zidane, Lady Beatrix, Captain Steiner." Smiling, Kuja walked off.
"I guess I'll be going too, and leaving you two alone…" Steiner snarled at Zidane. Zidane did his best to look innocent- and failed miserably. "Have fun!"
Edonil: Just for the record, I'm going to be playing with some of the stereotypes that Kuja had picked up over his years in fanfics. That's why I had to make him leave with Dagger, but not have an affair with her. I apologize to everyone who wanted to see a Kuja/Dagger pairing. Oh, and for anyone who cares, I love the word snogging; it sounds so funny!
