The Nearness of You
Disclaimer: I own nothing!
Thank you, thank you, and thank you!
By the way, try reading my other story, TIES THAT BIND... it has no Spike, and nothing to do with this story, but I'm proud of it, and hope yall will sample it.
Warning, I do take some creative license for things that happen in Sunnydale. Like Dawn never happens, because the slayer is not there to protect her, so what sense does it make for Dawn to exist?
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-----Pieces of Me-----
"Slayer, wake up," Spike said as he gently rubbed her shoulder. Buffy's head was resting up against the window and she was resting peacefully. It was almost a shame to wake her.
"Mmmm, are we there already?" Buffy asked sleepily and somewhat confused.
"No, but we are at a hotel," Spike replied, softly brushing her blonde hair.
"Wha-?" Buffy asked, sitting up in her seat looking around.
"The sun is coming up, pet. You and the bit are knackered, figured a little rest would do us all some good," Spike explained, climbing into the back seat and unstrapping Emma, who wrapped herself around Spike like a little koala bear.
Spike led Buffy up a flight of stairs, until he reached the right hotel door. Spike struggled with the key, holding a sleeping child was hampering his movements. Finally Buffy groaned and took the key from him and with little effort, opened the door.
The hotel had an outdoors motif; forest green and brown were the two primary colors in the rooms. It wasn't that bad of a room that Spike had gotten for them. It was a large room with a small TV, two beds, a couch, and a bathroom in back. While Buffy was checking out the bathroom, Spike put Emma to bed taking off her jacket and shoes he tucked her in.
"You're a pro at that," Buffy said from the bathroom doorway. She watched the heart-warming tenderness of Spike putting their daughter to bed.
"I love children," Spike admitted, with a cute grin as he jumped onto the only free bed.
"I could see that, you being childlike," Buffy replied with a teasing laugh. Spike still grinning tossed a pillow at her head playfully.
"Tell me about this new Buffy, the one supporting a growing child," Spike inquired, attempting to sound casual. Buffy walked across the room and sat down next to him on the bed.
"Well as you can imagine, I wanted to stay near Emma, so I took a job selling paintings on the Internet and soon I was able to rent the house you saw." Buffy explained, leaning onto Spike.
"What sort of paintings do you sell? Are they pornographic?" Spike asked teasingly, getting cozy wrapping an arm around Buffy. It felt like forever since he got to hold her.
"No! I sell original paintings..." Buffy replied cryptically. Buffy sighed as she inhaled the scent of Spike's duster. Tobacco and something else she couldn't quite place.
"Original paintings, eh. Of what?" Spike asked while caressing her shoulder.
"The monsters I've fought over the years. People love to have these terrifying creatures on their walls and I love the money it generates. Symbiosis." Buffy explained, lacing her fingers together.
"Really…" Spike said leaning into Buffy and giving her a kiss.
"Would you stop! Great seeing you again, but my daughter is right there," Buffy said gesturing to the other bed where her daughter slept, "Tell me about what you've been doing the last five years?" Buffy asked changing the subject.
She regretted scolding him, but she did not just want to jump into another physical relationship with Spike. If Buffy was gonna make things right Spike would have to get to know his daughter first.
"Well after Drucilla went crazy and left me, I went looking for you. Well I needed a place to stay and your mum needed the protection and the company, so I took up living in the basement of your old house." Spike explained with a sigh. He knew he was pushing his luck, but Buffy was his addiction. After one taste, Spike was completely hooked.
"You're living in my house!" Buffy exclaimed with shock.
"What? You don't live there. Me and your mum get along great; I help at her little gallery. I even prepare meals for her and she makes me hot chocolate with those little marshmallows. I don't really know how it happened, she recognized me as your band mate. Next thing I know she's letting me stay in the basement." Spike reminisced with a fond smile.
"I'm gone for five years and you become me?" Buffy asked sarcastically with a quirked eyebrow.
"I'm still Spike the evil vampire who shagged you in the park. So what if I live with your mum? It's not like I'm helping Angel or any of your lame friends," Spike insisted.
"Angel?" Buffy asked very quietly.
"Yeah, he and your merry band of friends go skipping around Sunnyhell protecting it," Spike replied tentatively.
"How are they?" Buffy asked looking away from Spike's intense blue eyes.
"Hurt," Spike answered. Buffy's head whipped around to look at him, concern all over her face.
"Are they in trouble?" Buffy asked truly worried for the welfare of her friends.
"No, they were hurt when you abandoned them. You never said goodbye. No one even knew why you left," Spike explained gazing into Buffy's deep green eyes.
"I had to. They were in danger," Buffy mumbled.
"Bullshit and you know it. You were ashamed of getting knocked up. You didn't want anyone to find out about some one-night-stand, so you split," Spike growled.
"What do you know about any of this?" Buffy said climbing off the bed and away from Spike.
"I know that Emma is amazing and I feel privileged just to have met her, but for some reason five years ago you wanted to cover up the fact that you had a child and Buffy believe me you did wonderful work," Spike said accusingly as he began to pace around the room.
"I did it to protect her!" Buffy said nailing Spike in the head with her shoe. "Her father was a dangerous vampire who would have used her against me!" Buffy yelled as she stormed out of the hotel room and into the sunlight, where Spike couldn't follow.
Suddenly Spike felt like he had been pumped full of lead. Angelus was Emma's father, unless Buffy had some other vampire man around. Spike walked over to Emma and brushed some stray hairs from her face. He wasn't sure why, but he felt heartbroken over the fact that Emma belonged to his sire. Angel didn't deserve her or her mother for that matter.
o8o8o8o
At sunset Buffy finally returned to find a sleepy Emma sprawled across Spike's chest. Buffy wasn't sure how Spike was going to take the news that he was Emma's father when she left, but she knew he would readily take Emma as his daughter. He obviously adored Emma like she was his.
"C'mon you two get up. I got breakfast," Buffy announced offering Spike a plastic container full of animal's blood.
"No need luv. I'll just eat Emma and we'll be on our way," Spike said as he picked up the giggling four year old and blew raspberries all over her tummy.
"Please, I'm more worried about Emma eating you," Buffy laughed out, placing a bacon and sausage McMuffin in front of her daughter.
"Where were you last night?" Spike tried to ask casually.
"Met this guy and we hit it off... No, I just went and slept in you car. Figured you'd want to be alone," Buffy explained.
When the three finished their breakfast, it was back to the car and back to speeding down the road, windows rolled down, and music from the Sex Pistols blaring over Spike's radio...
o8o8o8o
"Tell me about Willow, how are she and Oz?" Buffy asked
"Well, Willow's a practicing witch now and a working on becoming a doctor," Spike said.
"And Oz?" Buffy asked.
"He left. Troubles controlling his inner wolf. Willow was a mess afterwards as you can imagine. But Willow fell in love with a real nice girl named, Tara," Spike said concentrating on the road.
"What! Willow's a le-, uhm with another girl?" Buffy asked wide-eyed.
"Oh, she's really quite sweet, both of them are actually." Spike replied placing his hand on Buffy's thigh.
"How is Xander? He's not gay, is he?" Buffy asked enjoying the feel of Spike's touch.
"No, he's a construction worker though and he is engaged to a former demon named Anya. She is hilarious, has this fear of bunnies, you'll see." Spike said laughing at some odd memories.
"Giles, what has my stuffy watcher been doing?" Buffy asked looking out her window as the night world sped by.
"Ummm... He bought the Magic Box and a red sports car," Spike responded watching Buffy to see her reaction.
"Liar," Buffy said shaking her head.
"I swear! After the high school blew up he needed a job, so the Magic Box became his. And I totaled his Citron in a wreck trying to escape some guys and you'll have to see it to believe it," Spike said trying to convince Buffy.
"Sunnydale High School blew up?" Buffy asked in near denial of all the changes.
"Yeah, at graduation the mayor did this whole Ascension thing and chased Angel through the school and the Scooby gang blew it up. Whole senior class was in on it. Quite amazing really that we survived," Spike said excitement evident in his tone.
"Huh, I missed a lot of stuff?" Buffy asked dismally.
"You have no idea. But everyone will be excited to see you and you won't have to deal with me anymore." Spike replied once again concentrating on the road.
"Maybe I like dealing with you though. It's different, last time it was like purely about the sex. But with Emma, you've become like this amazing man that I would like to get to know better," Buffy responded a little shyly trying to convince Spike to look into her eyes.
"When we arrive everyone's going to have questions for you and Emma's going to want to get to know her real father better," Spike explained.
"You're right, she will, and I will probably have to form the whole Scooby gang so I don't have to tell the same stories over and over again," Buffy said thinking aloud.
"Aren't you going to ask, slayer?" Spike asked after a long silence between the two.
"Ask what?" Buffy asked.
"About Angel. I'm sure you've been dying to know, since I mentioned him," Spike snapped at her suddenly turning moody.
"Tell me about Angel then," Buffy asked so quietly Spike wasn't sure if she actually asked.
"He's great, lives in the mansion, and fights for puppies and rainbows. Usual crap. Oh! And Cordelia lives with him and his son Connor," Spike said knowing it was wrong and he should have let Angel say it himself. But Spike was sick of his sire getting everything he wanted.
"Son? Angel has a son?" Buffy asked.
"Yeah, Darla came to Sunnydale and they had a good old time, nine months later, well you know the drill. 'Cept she died to bring Connor into the world, so he's like this tiny little infant that Angel won't stop fussing over. An' looks like now Connor has a half sister to look forward to. Angels going to have to learn to delegate his love between his two children," Spike growled with bitterness,
"Two? Who's the other child?" Buffy asked, sitting on the edge of her seat.
"Emma! Remember your daughter, her father was a sodden evil vampire!" Spike snapped. How could Buffy be so daft?
"Yes, you are her father! I thought you got that," Buffy said reaching out and touching the side of Spike's face trying to comfort him.
"I'm her father! I can't be, we were only together the one time!" Spike yelled pulling the car off the side of the road and getting out to contemplate what he was being told.
Buffy looked at Spike and wanted to go to him. But then she looked at sweet little Emma sitting in the back seat waiting. Buffy couldn't stop the tears, once they started. She knew when she wasn't wanted, but she was hoping Spike would have at least stuck around until Sunnydale before abandoning them. Buffy would not wait around to watch Emma get hurt.
As he paced nervously back and forth he noticed Buffy carrying Emma away from the car and away from him. He chased after her, but she refused to stop and refused to face him, but Spike had already seen the tears.
"Slayer stop!" Spike demanded.
"Go to hell!" Buffy yelled as she continued to walk quickly down the road. Jogging, he got in front of her and stopped her.
"Buffy please?" Spike pleaded running his hands along her waist and hips.
"Let me go." Buffy insisted trying to shove past.
"Where are you going?" Spike asked his deep blue eyes probing Buffy for answers.
"I'm taking Emma away! Where she won't be a problem to you," Buffy replied tears freely flowing down her face.
"Is that what you think, I think? Because you are sorely mistaken Ms. Summers. This is the happiest moment in my unlife. I just needed a minute to think. Where are we going to live? How am I going to support a family? I want to take care of you both..." Spike explained placing a hand tenderly onto the side of Buffy's face and wiping away the tears with his thumb.
"Be mine Buffy?" Spike asked as he leaned in and kissed her tenderly.
"I was yours long ago." Buffy replied returning Spike's tender kiss while awkwardly holding Emma on her hip.
"We should go, there's still a bit of a drive." Spike said as he ushered his women back to his car with a huge smile on his face. He was a father. Spike was not sure what he had done right in his terrible life to have earned such a precious gift, but he swore not to fuck it up.
