THE ABSENCE OF GOOD

They say evil is the absence of good. What if someone you thought was evil was just missing his other half?

A/N: I think I give valid credit for all my quotes and I hope you guys will give me the pleasure of reading your reviews! And Lily, I heart you!

"We enjoy warmth because we have been cold. We appreciate light because we have been in darkness. By the same token, we can experience joy because we have known sadness." - David Weatherford

Oh he'd known sadness alright. All he'd ever had in life was sadness. From the first breath he took, to the slow shallow breaths he was taking now as he flipped through the pages of her diary. It was filled with quotes of all kinds, books she had read, and the everyday happenings of her life.

"The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart." - Helen Keller

He wondered if he could feel true joy. He'd felt joy when he was with her, but it was always overshadowed by the growing fears of who they were. They were living on different sides, and someday, it was going to catch up with them.

"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength; loving someone deeply gives you courage." - Lao Tzu

He watched her sleeping on the bed only a few feet away from him. She'd been his angel, from the very beginning, even when he was too stupid to realize it.

Dear Diary,

What does it mean to Heart someone? Luna says she Heart's Ron. I don't get it. I suppose it means love, but I don't understand why they just don't say that instead. Maybe it's too big of a commitment. Maybe they say it because the word love is to strong, and heart is easier to get used too. In that case, I suppose I Heart Draco. He needs to be Hearted. I figure maybe, if I Heart him enough, then he can make a fair choice about who he really wants to be. Maybe I should tell him I heart him... nah, he wouldn't get it.

Ginny

A smile crossed his lips as he read her words. He knew she hadn't wanted him to read the journal when they were together, but he couldn't resist. She had given him her journal a week ago, so that he could know how she felt. But he already knew, every time he looked in her eyes.

He'd be leaving soon. His 7 years in school were up and it was time to start his life. Or leave it behind. He hadn't really decided which yet. His father wanted him to join the death eaters. And while Ginny hadn't made him promise not to, he knew it would break her heart if he did. He'd thought briefly about becoming an Auror. It was that blasted Potter who'd made him think about it.

He'd had a confrontation with Harry about Ginny actually, just a few weeks ago. Outside of the pair Harry was the only one who knew about their relationship. And it was only because he'd found one of Ginny's notes to him. It had been an interesting conversation.

Harry slammed him against the wall roughly before turning back around to lock the door of the empty classroom.

"Well, well Potter, never knew you swung that way. Not that I can blame you--"

"Shut up Malfoy. I'm here for one reason and it isn't to listen to you babble." He spat, holding an angry finger to Draco's face. Draco smirked in response.

"I would assume not. After all it's quite hard to talk while you--"

"MALFOY!" Harry interrupted again. "I'm here to warn you." Harry dropped the hand and became a little bit calmer. Draco's face turned to a well practiced scowl.

"Warn me about what Potter?" He folded his arms.

"Listen closely, because I'm only going to say this once. Stay away from Ginny." He said, his voice low and threatening. Draco's mind raced, but he retained his perfect unfazed composure on the outside. He starred Harry down for a moment deciding which move to make. Deny or threaten.

"I highly doubt she'd want to likes of you defending her." Draco growled. Harry reached a hand out and grabbed Draco by the collar of his shirt.

"I know what's best for her!" He shouted. "It's my job to take care of her, not yours! Now that Ron's... now that he... it is none of your business. And I expect you to stay away from her." He tossed Draco forcefully backwards. He didn't walk away though. He was waiting for Draco to say something. So he did.

"Sod off Potter. I'll do whatever I please." Bad idea, his brain decided as Harry rushed him.

He grabbed him and sent him tumbling over one of the desks. Draco stood back up and readied himself for another attack. When Harry swung at him he quickly ducked and sucker punched Harry in the gut. He pushed him away. Then in an instant he had his wand out and pointed at Harry's temple. Harry stopped moving.

"Now listen here Potter. I'm sorry about your friend, but get a bloody punching bag. Don't try to take out your aggressions on me for something you have no say in. It's none of your business. And believe me when I say that I will never hurt Ginny. I'm the only Slytherin who can say that. Now I could kill you right down with two little words. But I can't very well revive your friend without your help." He pulled the wand away from Harry's head and offered him a hand.

"What did you say?" Harry asked slowly. He starred dumbfounded at the hand Draco was offering him.

After that the conversation had turned friendly. Took seven years, but they finally seemed to agree on something. Harry no longer objected to Draco being with Ginny, but he didn't seem to have any qualms about asking why.

"I don't get you Malfoy." Harry said quietly. Draco nodded.

"Only one person does. And if any idiot was ever stupid enough to accuse me of hurting her... lets just say he'd regret it." Draco threatened lightly. Harry nodded.

"But I mean... you are going to hurt her. Everyone in the whole school knows about your initiation. If you're going to... well you know... how can you two be together?" He questioned. Draco starred at the wall for a few minutes before answering with a sad smile.

"We haven't really figured that part out yet." He shrugged. Harry waited a moment in pensive silence before speaking again.

"You don't have to do it." He said at last. Draco guffawed.

"Sure. Death is an option." He sarcastically rolled his eyes but Harry shook his head.

"You could become an Auror. Take the courses with me and Hermione." He suggested. Draco starred at him blankly for a moment. He'd never thought of that. Finally he smirked.

"Become an Auror. What a cruel irony. What a pretty price I'd fetch." He sniggered. To his surprise Harry smiled.

"It'd be dangerous. But you could be with Ginny." Harry stated. Draco was quiet for a long time after that. What a change going to the good side would be. What a liberation.

"It'd never work." He shook his head at Harry. "It's a nice dream, anyway." He hopped off the table he'd been sitting on and headed for the door. "We'll talk again soon Potter."

Draco rubbed his eyes from the memory. An Auror. When he'd asked Ginny she hadn't wanted to say anything, but he could tell she was delighted by the idea. But how long could happiness ever last for them?

"Draco?" Ginny's sleepy voice sounded slightly panicked as she rolled over. He quickly shut the book and set it in the drawer but she was sitting up in the bed already.

"Are you reading the book?" She asked suspiciously.

"No. I was just thinking." He said hastily. She eyed him carefully.

"I'm sure. I'm going to have to take that thing away from you and give it back to you two weeks from now if you don't stop reading it." She came over and sat down on his lap. He smiled lazily at her. He brought a hand up to stroke her face gently and she leaned in to kiss him.

After a moment he picked her up and carried her back to the bed. He laid her down gently and she giggled up at him.

"What're you laughing at?" He chided. She pulled him down on top of her and he kissed her again. When he pulled away he looked down at her caringly.

"I heart you." He whispered.

"Sneak!" She accused, hitting him gently in the shoulder. He smiled at her and pulled the covers over both their heads, content to stay where they were for the rest of the night.

"Maybe, but I still heart you." He said as he began tickling her.

"Mercy!" She said as he continued tickling her. She finally sprung up and pressed her lips to his and he ceased his attack. She pulled away with a smug smile.

"That's cheating." He told her.

"You broke the rules first! Mercy means stop remember?" She scolded. He answered her with a kiss.

And they stayed that way until the sun came up.