Disclaimer: Still not mine okay?
A/N: My, my! minna san THANKS SO MUCH for the reviews!!! Sorry it took a while. I'm back in school as well and the professors thought we had enough rest and each dumped piles of paperwork the students' lap! You can imagine the torture!
Some quick notes:
1) I'm glad that you guys are enjoying this fic despite the fact that it is quite too cliché…
2) to everyone: Thanks for the suggestions and the revs. : )
3) to Spawn of Hell and Norna Urd : I guess you're right. Sometimes when fics take too long they become ruined for good. So please do tell if I'm starting to make a mess of this one. : )
4) About this being a valentine's fic… well, I'll just see what I can dish out… but if I start bore you guys I'll end it on the next chapter. : )
5) to Norna Urd : Oh my! Thank you. But then… Yes. I guess I okay. Although, you might reconsider when it's done… so maybe you should see if you like how this ends first, ne? then let me know if you're still willing to do it. : )
6) to rei-kitty: "Yare, yare"… it's from my beloved Cho Hakkai of Saiyuki. More specifically: "Maa, maa. Yare, yare desu ne." Something like: "Oh well, here we go again…" : )
7) to katgrl: I know what you mean about school. : )
8) author chuckling: this is that expected day after scene… so cliché really… do forgive me… I tried not to make it too much…
9) this part is still sad! More Ken angst. (Bad Kage!) Coz I'm kinda upset about all the piles of school worked currently dumped in my room… so I took a break and typed this chappie… Tell me if I get too redundant, onegai?
Please Read and Review!!! Arigatou!!!
Frost by Kage Kurokawa
Part IV Shards
It was pounding.
It was loud.
It was painful.
It feels like hell.
Oh, somebody's gonna pay.
Yes, somebody's going to suffer a slow, deliberate, torture.
Somebody's gonna die.
Somebody's gonna scream for mercy before this day is over.
Make that somebody a certain, lanky, skirt chasing, hormone overloaded blonde.
That much Ken Hidaka knew the minute he woke up like he was promptly ran over and then hit in the head by a bulldozer. Not to mention thefact that his whole body feels sore and numb at the same time. Espesciallyas he immediately sat up, that he had no choice but to groan and fall back on wherever he was lying. He landed on something soft. Might have been a bed.
There are sheets. He could swear he is on a bed. His head fell on a pillow. Definitely a bed. But he cannot remember going home and getting into bed.
Besides, it was still quite warm. He hazily remembered something about a broken heater.
Which means…
Oh hell no! He didn't freakin' go and sleep with some nameless bimbo last night did he?
He groaned some more. Somebody make the pain stop!
His head ached even more as he tried to remember what kind of stupidity he had gone and done the previous night. And it had been New Year too.
What a great way to start the year. Just great.
His eyes remained closed as his hands crept their way on either side of his body trying to cautiously feel any presence. There was none.
He sighed in relief.
But the right side was slightly warm. There was a slight indentation on that spot.
Uh. Oh.
He felt beneath the sheets.
He was wearing boxers.
Good.
His heart began to pound in time with his head.
Then it hits him.
He was wearing...
Nothing but boxers.
Not good.
He tried to open his eyes but even in what seemed to be a faint light they hurt a bit before they gradually adjusted.
He was on a bed.
Inside a room.
It was midmorning already.
The scene is vaguely familiar for a moment.
Before he realized where he has.
He was…
In his bed.
Inside his room.
In the middle of the day.
And his boxers. Red boxers with green dotted prints. (A/N: Polka dots. Hehehe. Sorry can't resist)
He sighed in relief again.
But then…
What the hell?
Slight panic set in.
He was in bed with someone, inside his room, during the New Year, wearing nothing but boxers?!
Color red flashes in mind.
Definitely not good.
He can not remember. His head still hurts.
Suddenly…
He doesn't feel so good. So he ran to the bathroom and…
Oh Youji is so gonna be dead!
xxx
Ken entered the kitchen a good thirty minutes later. Wearing a green sweater and the usual faded blue jeans. Omi was just putting a steaming cup of chocolate on the tabe before settling down on a chair.
The chibilooked up and smiled.
"Ohayo Ken-kun! Happy New Year!!!"
"Not so loud please, Omi!" The brunette sat down and held his head. He tried to smile.
"But a Happy New Year to you too."
"Anou, Ken--?"
"Just a hangover Omi."
"Oh. Do you need anything?"
"Happy New Year everyone!!!" A certain blonde vociferously greeted the room.
"Owww! Youji!!!" Hangovers are killers.
"Hello Kenken! Had a nice night?" There's that big silly grin.
"I'm gonna kill you today, Youji." Glare. Pain. Ouch.
"You mean you didn't get any last night?" Teasing. Smug.
Ken was livid. His head hurt. He felt his cheeks reddened.
Omi blushed.
"Fuck off!"
"Already done that, thank you very much." Smirk.
Silence.
"So does this mean you didn't get some?"
"Shut up!!! Owww!!! I have a nasty hangover and its all because of you!"
"Hey I didn't I didn't ask you to get drunk last night…"
"I wasn't drunk, I was…"
"Yeah, yeah. Tipsy, tipsy. That's what you kept muttering last night before you left. Like I believe you anyway."
"Left? You were the one who left me with some random blonde airhead!"
Shrug. "She seemed bright enough to me. Who cares though? She looked hot!"
Wide blueeyes simply looked back and forth to his two friends.
"You know Kenken, if you asked nicely I'll make the Youji special hangover vanishing concoction."
Eyebrows raised in distrust.
"Hey it's very effective, trust me." Wink.
Blue green eyes narrow but said nothing.
"Seriously, if it doesn't work, I'll let you kill me today."
He looked at Omi. The chibi's face contorted slightly in disgust.
Ken frowned.
"Hahaha. Don't mind the chibi. I made him some one time and…"
"Omi got drunk?"
Omi blushed.
"It works Kenkun." The genki kid changed the subject immediately. "It tastes like garbage but it does the job."
Shrug. Might as well. Anything to kill the pain.
xxx
Minutes later.
"What is that?"
It was green. No. Brown. No. Dark yellow. Ken couldn't really decide.
It indeed looked like garbage.
Youji smiled evilly and handed the soccer player the equally evil-looking glass.
It smelled like shit too.
Covering his nose. He gobbled it all down in one gulp.
It tasted like crap.
He wanted to throw up.
He must have looked it as Youji laughed and Omi looked at him with sympathy.
What a way to begin the year.
At least his head is clearing up a bit.
Youji's drink is starting to take effect. Thank goodness.
But he'll still kill that playboy later.
xxx
"So where'd you go last night Kenken?"
Where did he go last night? Honestly, he couldn't quite remember. He dimly remembered leaving the bar. And then walking. Yeah. He did wander along the city streets. But where did he go? Somewhere with a bench. He saw red again. But it was still very vague. So in response he said:
"Oh just drifted here and there. Then I went back home after midnight."
Oh that was nice, considering he couldn't recall how the hell he managed to get back safely. Another image. The warm empty space on his bed. He'd have to figure that out later.
"Aww… Poor Kenken. Spent the New Year alone. If you'd just stayed and---"
"Youji!"
"Did you see the fireworks Kenkun? They were wonderful!"
Fireworks? Yes he remembered fireworks. Somewhat. It lit up the black sky with a dazzling array of colors. But the dominant color was… violet?
Yes he remembered the fireworks.
"Yeah I saw the display Omi. It was beautiful."
Yes it was indeed beautiful. The color purple.
One name.
Aya.
Where did that come from?
"Oh I have to go now you guys. Aya-kun's alone at the shop. I just told him I'd take a short break."
"Ya, go do that chibi before he goes into the king-of-the-jungle-mode." Snicker.
"But Aya-kun is quite in a good mood today, Yo-tan."
"Yeah, I could almost swear that I heard him mutter a 'happy new year' when I greeted him as I entered. Most strange. If I didn't know better I'd say he got laid last night."
And for unknown reasons, a certain brunette choked on water.
Two blondes stared at him weirdly and then looked at each other questioningly.
Eyebrows lift. There was a smirk. A shrug.
And the chibi went back to the shop.
xxx
It had been a week since he woke up with the hangover. But Ken couldn't get some things out of his head. He managed to figure out some things but not everything.
Things like how the hell did he get home. One name.
Aya.
How did he end up in his boxers. One name.
Aya.
Who slept in his bed that night. One name.
Aya.
Did anything happen?
He doesn't know.
Who does he have to ask then? One name.
Aya.
Now figuring out who got the answers was the easy part.
Confronting the said person? Demanding explanations? That would be the predicament.
Youji must have been dreaming when he said that Aya was in a 'good' mood that morning. His temperament was anything but 'good'. Or so it seemed to Ken who was blatantly ignored the whole day.
And the next few days, Aya had been more aloof than ever. If that was possible. Not to mention irritable. He'd snap at the smallest things. Scaring those poor little devoted fangirls away. And making one of them cry the other day.
He knew Aya was deliberately avoiding him. And truth be told, he didn't want to talk either because he didn't know what he was supposed to say. He's still only got bits and pieces here and there. But nothing quite concrete. The scenes were still quite shadowy except for that kiss in the midst of the fireworks and then nothing more... There's a big chunk of space between midnight and midmorning that needs some clarity... He could almost laugh. Things look like one of those conventional denial and evasion scenes that happen on morning-afters in those cheesy, romantic soap operas. But then, when he dwell on it, he wasn't even sure if there was even a night before that he should be worried about.
And then there's a little voice in his head that keeps saying he has to know…
So, it was on a quiet afternoon when Omi was out to do research with his friends and Youji went on one of his usual trysts and the shop was uncannily empty that Ken decided that it was the perfect opportunity to talk with the redhead.
Aya was currently seating behind the counter as usual, reading the day's newspaper. Who the hell reads the newspaper on the afternoons? Aya does.
Although he doesn't really read. He just wants to make his companion think that he's reading. So he will not be bothered. So he will not be forced to talk.
But alas, Lady Luck has left the building.
"Aya?" The brunette began cautiously.
The recipient of the name did not bother to look up.
"Aya." He tried again.
"…"
Ken Hidaka was beginning to lose his patience. So he took a deep breath.
"Aya." Again.
"…" Again.
"Aya."
"..." Ignore.
Somebody got fed up. Stalked up to the counter. Yanked the newspaper from pale hands. And smiled sweetly.
"Let's talk shall we?"
"…" Play dumb.
"We have to set some things straight."
"…" Play mute.
"Are you even listening?"
"…" Play deaf.
"Dammit Aya! I'm tired of playing this charade over and over again. Why won't you be a man about it and talk to me?"
"…" Ouch. He's really pushing it.
"Look, I want things out in the open. I want know where I stand--- where we stand."
That's it. "There is no "we", Ken. As cliché as it sounds there is 'you', there is 'me'. But there is no 'we'."
"Right. Well, I'm sorry that I keep failing to remember that tiny detail every time you kiss the life out me!"
"Ken-"
A sigh of defeat. "Damn you ! I tried to walk away, Aya. I really did. I tried to ignore it. Get rid of it. But it keeps gnawing at me. It won't give me peace. That you say and do things that frustrate me even more does not help me forget it in anyway. I give up Aya. I really do. I just get more confused when I try to figure you out. You kiss me then you punch me. You kiss me then you mock me. I hear you say you hate me behind my back one minute and then smother me with kisses the next. What the hell do you want me to think?"
"It's not that simple Ken-"
"Yes it is. Either you return my feelings or you don't. I really like you Aya."
"I don't like you Ken." Cold.
Ouch.
Pause.
"ButI think we both needed that." Monotonous.
Need. What a word.
Silence.
It stretched uncomfortably. Until.
"Damn straight Aya." That hurt. Ken wanted to add. It hurt a lot. "So that night-"
"There was nothing to it. It was one night. That's it. That's all you asked for. And that's all I'm willing to give." A shrug.
Aya was right. Ken agreed. Faraway words reached his ears…
"For now let me pretend that I'm actually warm…"But that didn't make the dull ache that's slowly rising in his chest go away.
"I understand." That's all he could say. And then he wonders whether he should regret making that little speech with Aya. He couldn't make up his mind which was more painful. Ignoring what happened and pretending it was all a pleasant dream (nightmare?), or facing the harsh reality and accepting it.
And the eerie silence stretched till closing time.
xxx
The clear night found this certain soccer player on a familiar ground. Once more, just like that snowy night a few weeks prior. He is here. He is not standing but sitting down on the dry ground beside the white marble. For some strange reason he finds comfort in this place. Hollow comfort. But a semblance of it is better than nothing. Isn't life ironic? He finds a weird sense of peace with a friend in death than when this 'best friend' was still alive.
Perhaps it's because this place reminds him of his naiveté. It reminds him that he is but a fool.
"Fooled you once, his fault. Fooled you twice, your fault." Yes. That was the popular saying and it seemed to add at the back ofKen's mind... "Fooled you thrice? You need your head examined."
Snowflakes gently fall once again, as it seems to do every night this winter season. But unlike that first night, he felt too numb to feel the chill.He sat there, looking at the ground with vacant, glazed eyes. The blue green orbs were surprisingly dry. And it seemed that for the first time in a long while, Ken Hidaka felt that he does not to have any tears left to cry.
Minutes. Hours. Time passed. Slowly. Swiftly. Unnoticed. The lone figure in the empty graveyard sat there, eerily still, as if he was somehow a part of thebleak world of the departed that surrounded him.
In the stillness of the night, something caught his eye. Before him was a shard of broken glass, glimmering in the pale light. He picked it up and brought it before his eyes. Something stirred within him, and for a moment he could sympathize with that jagged piece in his hand.
Alone.
Broken.
Unwanted.
Cold.
Just like him.
End chapter
A/N: Err… this was long chapter, ne? Not the confrontation scene you were expecting right? Not what I expected either… So how was it? Did you get that urge to throw the computer at me? Sappy, crappy, frustrating? Do tell… and review!!! Thanks!
Well, I'm gonna go back now to the mundane world of schoolwork… yay! (author is sarcastic and muttering silent curses at reality)…
Extra: i edited some errors in the text coz this had been a type and post coz i'm frustrated with life kind of chappie... so gomenasai!
Ja!
See you guys next week! : )
