DISCLAIMER: I don't own anything from the Naruto universe. This is my Mito, though.


Thinking (+ flashbacks, "Mito speaking to Kurama in her mindscape," etc.)

Emphasis

Bijuu, etc. speaking

Bijuu, etc. thinking


Minato frowned at his daughter. They were eating breakfast - something that Naruto absolutely refused to do because of his test (dammit, Kakashi) when he left at 0500 - and Mito had just told him about what happened at the bar. She was angry with him. "Mito, I don't know what to say. Hideki's your guard but I never told him to have you home at a certain hour or anything."

Mito narrowed her eyes, almost ready to ask her overgrown, multi-tailed associate that resided in her gut if her father was lying.

"...Your guards do, however, have orders to get you out of any sticky situations before they arise. Were you in danger?" Minato asked. He knew, however, that had Mito been in danger, he would've been told about it.

"Hell no! I was just sitting there talking to Anko-chan and Kakashi-kun."

Minato tented his hands over his bowl of miso and hummed. "Were you discussing classified information or…"

"Of course not," Mito said hotly, regretting that her hair had come alive again; it seemed to be trying to reach over and strangle her father/village leader. She grabbed and petted it, wishing it would calm down. "Honestly, what do you think of me? Do you really think I'm that untrustworthy?"

"I don't think that at all," Minato cried adamantly.

"Forget it," Mito mumbled to herself, picking up her soup bowl and emptying its contents into her pie-hole. "Pie: I wish I had pie. –Anyway, maybe Hideki just needed to get home or something. Sorry; I… I really do sincerely apologize for my earlier words and poor attitude."

"Don't be sorry," Minato said, wishing that she'd look him in the eye and then almost wincing when she did. She looked so distraught. "I was the one who asked about last night."

"Because you thought I might be losing control? –I was just angry. It happens!"

"Mito, you're ready to take your MASTERY of fuuinjutsu test. You know as well as I do that your seal is unstable. The matrices were disturbed when…"

"Yep, and I also know I'm fine now; I've MADE it fine. I'm… loyal and I'd ask why you can't treat me like the Jonin I am but I don't have time to hang out for answers, sadly."

The father and daughter would make up later: that night before dinner, in fact.
But that was Future Mito. Present Mito was still more than a little pissed.

"I've gotta get to my team. And by the way, I cannot imagine anything that would make me lose control of the fox!"


Asuma sneezed and wondered if someone was thinking about him. He hoped that it was Kurenai but figured it might also be Mito-baka who WOULD BE REPAYING HIM for all the drinks she'd had last night.

Asuma frowned at the server when he went to pay his bill, knowing that these charges weren't all his.

"Before Mito-hime left, she said that you would pay her tab, Lord Sarutobi. She said it was a special occasion."

"I don't associate with that woman," he'd lied adamantly.
Oh, Cheapo Mito was so going to get it!

Grumbling, he nearly chewed up what was rapidly turning into the butt of his cigarette as he thought about the whole thing.

Ino clicked her tongue. "Do you really have to smoke that around us?"

Asuma blew the smoke toward her, using a quick wind jutsu to really nail her and the other kids, too. "Yes. I do." They all coughed and hacked, Ino-chan really putting on a display that he knew was overboard. Choji eventually raised his hand and Asuma sighed. The Akimichi was a cute kid but the nervous chip-eating needed to stop. He put the butt out on the underside of his sandal. "What?"

"I was just wondering about the test, Asuma-sensei." His new sensei nodded at him and boy did the Jonin look aggravated about something. Choji was pretty sure that they hadn't done anything too bad yet. His new team had all just been standing around, looking at each other and trying not to breathe in cigarette smoke: it was unhealthy! "Um. What would you like us to do?"

"Well, this is a learning and teaching exercise for all four of us. We'll all get to know each other a little better this morning, ne?" Three heads bobbed at their sensei. Choji looked nervous, Ino looked haughty, and Shikamaru looked like his father. Asuma groaned and pulled out his lighter and a new cigarette. Lighting it up, Asuma grinned when he saw how disgusted they all looked.

He was giving them a pretty damn obvious clue, though.

"You are to determine, search for and find my very valued possession," he asked, putting his hands in his Jonin vest's pockets. "You may attack me with the intent to kill." Choji raised his hand again while Ino nearly shrieked at him. She definitely hurt his ears.

"How are we supposed to know what you 'value?'" Ino asked sassily. Her big, burly sensei shrugged and then pointed his bearded chin up toward Choji but Ino was already moving - having realized that she knew EXACTLY how to figure out what he wanted them to do! She put her hands together in a seal (one that Asuma knew very well.) "Watch over me, Shikamaru! Shintenshin no… OOF!"

Within a second, Asuma had kicked them all - one, two, three - into the treeline where, fortunately for them, Shikamaru ordered them to hide in a pained grunt. "Lesson one, brats: taijutsu." I didn't kick them that hard: Ino really needs to stop complaining so much.

"Hmmm." Maybe I can have Kurenai or Mito talk to her about being a real kunoichi and not a fangirl… God damn that Mito: making me pay her tab - and Anko's!

And I'd better not hear Ino-chan mention "Sasuke-kun" one more time or I'm going to actually make this test hard. The girl had been complaining about "Forehead" being on Hatake's team again (as she had when he formally met the team) while he watched before making his presence known this morning: enough to make him really dread this experience. Ino's got a long way to go. He would've been surprised that Inoichi allowed her to carry on this way but knew the man well enough to figure out that he was a very doting father.

He felt the Yamanaka girl begin to probe his mind and groaned. Circulating his chakra quickly, he pushed her attempt away and hopped toward them while running through a couple of hand seals "Nice try. Lesson two: genjutsu." He broke out in quiet laughter when they soon staggered and fell to the ground; Ino at least caught herself - and Shikamaru had helped Choji, which was nice.

The jar of having landed/fallen to the ground knocked them out of the genjutsu. He met the angry eyes of a Nara. Ho? Didn't like that, did ya?

It's always dangerous to piss off a Nara!

It had only been a D-ranked technique! Did they really not teach how to break genjutsus at the Academy anymore? They were supposed to - although maybe his Hell Viewing Technique was a little much. "Wanna regroup?" Shikamaru nodded and sighed out a "troublesome" as the three kids ran away again - making him chuckle. The kid was right: this really was troublesome.

They did hide pretty well and he could barely hear them plotting. Asuma's eyes lit up as Choji came barrelling at him like a giant bowling ball. He easily dodged, noting that a shadow wasn't attached, and pushed out his trench knives. "Very good, and that brings us to lesson three: ninjutsu." He turned and winced as his Gale Palm jutsu hit Choji right as the kid barrelled into a tree. Maybe that was too much. He should've paid more attention.

And then that's when the Nara (and thus the shadow) moved. Asuma felt himself still and grinned as the Nara forced him to pull out his pack of cigarettes. Ino was on him next, pulling out his lighter when Shikamaru let go of his jutsu. "Aww. What do you two think you're doing?"

"I think we just passed your teamwork test," the Nara kid said with a smirk. He waited for Choji to join them, hoping he was right. He'd heard about a different version of this test before when his father had been complaining about that silver-haired Jonin. Ino had their sensei's cigarettes - Shikamaru frowned at her, hoping that she wouldn't do anything stupid with them in case the Jonin loved them that much - but she'd tossed the lighter to Choji as he'd asked her to.

"Well, you've got my cigs and lighter," Asuma commented. He pulled out a single he had in his chest pocket, lit it up with his old man's seal-less spark jutsu, and smirked at them. (He'd also sneakily grabbed some gunpowder that was in that pocket, too, and dropped it into his other hand.) "So?" Now the three kids looked scared. He grinned more. "What's the plan, Boss?" he asked the Nara.

Ino scowled again and complained under her breath about Shikamaru not being her boss. Asuma let out a tired whimper. He probably will be your boss sooner or later, kid: just wait. The Nara kid had a certain dangerous intelligence in his eyes just like his father did. He planned to challenge the kid to a game of shogi to see how smart and tactical Shikamaru might really be.

"Troublesome - but I believe this is what you want." Shikamaru handed over the lighter.

Asuma hummed and pulled up his sleeves to ensure his minions saw the rather unusual seals on his forearms and tucked his trench knives into one of them. Normally they'd just appear in his hands with a push of chakra through his arms. Thank you, Mito; but not for making me pay for your drinks, you utter dumbass. "And you three are in agreement that that's what I was looking for?" They didn't look like they were.

"I figured it was your cigarettes since you were so obvious about loving the disgusting things so much," Ino admitted with a flip of her ponytail. "But Shikamaru believed you needed your lighter to smoke one." She glared at her lazy teammate.

"Hmm. He was right but did I mention ninjutsu?" He began running through slow hand seals: Snake →Rat → Snake →Tiger and called out his jutsu as the kids looked shocked but ran away again; the Yamanaka girl was yelling about how he HAD mentioned ninjutsu - which was both funny and true. "Katon: Haisekishō!" He popped some gunpowder into his mouth and let her rip, controlling exactly where the ash and smoke went.

That's as far as the jutsu went today: no explosion, sadly.

Asuma was wind-natured: at this point in his career, this was very easy for him to control if he gave it real thought. "Lesson four: Buki Jutsu," he yelled. He rather lazily threw some kunais toward the kids' positions (through the smoke) and enjoyed hearing them yelp. It sounded like they all at least dodged fairly well. "Are ya gonna come back or not." Silence reigned for a few minutes - aside from the initial coughing.

"No, sir!"

Asuma grinned: that was Choji's voice. He walked toward them and blew the ash away so that he could see them. "You all did pretty well but we've got a LONG way to go. The test's over: I just have a few questions." Three wary kids made their way toward him. They all had weapons out. "Good; glad you're thinking ahead. Now Choji, do you think I wanted my cigs or my lighter back? Or somethin' else?"

Choji bit his lips and looked toward his best friend. "I wasn't sure but um… Although Ino made some good points, I trust Shikamaru's judgment. But," he added quickly, wanting to placate Ino and really explain, "I thought it better that we get both your lighter and your cigarettes. You can never be too careful!"

Asuma nodded. "That's a good point, kid." The kids gasped as a large purple barrier sprang to life in the distance. "And would you look at that? Someone's teaching a lesson about another shinobi art: fuuinjutsu."

"Should we investigate the barrier?" Shikamaru asked, unusually serious.

Now Asuma knew just where Mito was - not that she could ever truly hide from him again! He'd wait for her to finish testing her Genins but then he was getting his money back. "Nah. Sit down and give me an overview of your strengths and weaknesses. After we do that, maybe we can go check things out."


.


Mito made five clones. Four of them shot out to make a perimeter and she and the leftover one watched her Genins nervously approach the training ground. She snickered. She wouldn't let them get hurt! Her remaining clone hopped into a tree and hid.

She cleared her throat and stepped forward. "Morning. Did you each bring your weapons and whatever else you might need?" Three heads hesitantly nodded as Shino and Kiba put a hand on each of Hinata's shoulders, pulling her back a bit. Good: you're already looking out for each other. Shino's bugs and little Akamaru seemed on high alert.

Mito was "leaking" some Intent, and it was great that they could so easily pick up on it.

"Sooo," Mito continued somewhat uncomfortably. "It's a bummer, but I need to see what you've got. Which means you're going to fight me - for all your worth. Lesson one, kiddies. –-Or shinobi art one: fuuinjutsu," she said, swiping a bloody thumb over a hidden seal over her vest and pressing chakra into it. The kids gasped as her Uzushio armor came out, quickly piecing over her uniform from seemingly out of nowhere for a little show.

"Holy crap: you're like a transformer," Kiba gasped. That was so cool! He wanted to do that!

"Thanks, I think." No one moved, frustrating the sensei. "I suggest you attack before I do."

A purple barrier appeared, surrounding them. Right on time! All three kids sucked in noisy breaths. So you've heard about them, have you?

Kiba had nodded to her challenge before that - and so had his puppy. "One, two, three: Gatsuga!"

Mito grinned and shut her eyes. She ducked and twirled around Kiba and grabbed Akamaru away from him, swatting Kiba aside and stunning the kid. She tried to hold herself back from smooching the dog: he seemed so scared! His little body was just trembling in her arms: poor baby! Hinata finally raced forward and Mito dropped the puppy into his prone master's arms. The Jonin jumped forward and then pulled back her fist and winked at the very frightened Hyuuga heiress as she tugged her jacket toward her with the other hand to lessen the blow. Pushing her fist into the ground (just a little harder than a love-tap) beside her, the earth exploded and Mito tossed the girl into Shino who was desperately trying to stay upright. "Lesson number two: taijutsu."

"That is NOT normal," Kiba cried. Mito shrugged but felt Shino's allies converging all around her.

Actually, it felt tickly although the bugs were gross to try to see through. Mito closed her eyes. "Better! Thank you, Shino. This leads us to shinobi art three, though, doesn't it? Ninjutsu." Not too fast and very soft: Tiger → Ox → Dog → Rabbit → Snake. "Futon: Daitoppa!" She breathed a sigh of relief as the bugs were blown away and returned to Shino and didn't seem hurt. She'd been really careful, having figured that Shino might react the way SHE would if any of her cats were hurt.

Later, I need to remind him to target his enemies' mouths. –That definitely would've grossed her out and probably sent her running.

"Thank you for the lesson, sensei, and for leaving my allies intact," the Aburame said seriously a beat later with a dip of his head.

Kawaii! "You're very welcome." No one moved so Mito slumped - which made them all draw out their kunais. She moved more quickly through the next three hand seals. Ox → Snake → Ram. "Suiton: Kirigakure no Jutsu." A mist began quickly gathering over Training Ground 43. She made four more clones and trotted off. "Catch me if you can!"

The Jonin's clone in the tree watched excitedly.

"Byakugan!" Hinata gasped. Before all the mist dropped lower, her sensei's chakras were… strange.

- Purple with blue and red bubbles and… What?
- Her chakra pathways aren't normal either!

"I can smell her out," Kiba volunteered at the same time, moving forward only to be held back by Shino.

"Hinata?" the taller boy asked. "What can you see?"

Kiba wanted to complain but figured he'd give Hinata a chance to help.

"The m- mist is l-laden with chakra; I can s-see through a- a little of it but… DOWN!" She pushed both boys down when a kunai came flying at them and suddenly her sensei was right there between all three of them.

"Lesson four, or if you'd rather, we can call it lesson three, subsection one or two? Hmm, ANYWAY, it's iryo-ninjutsu." Mito quickly checked the (increasingly bewildered, floundering) kids to ensure that they were okay with a diagnostic jutsu on each of them. (She thought she might have punched the ground a little too hard and was worried about their ears, especially.) They seemed fine. "Iryo-ninjutsu can also be used to battle, ya know." A chakra scalpel appeared on her index finger and she turned around in a circle, giving them all a scary look.

"F- fall back," Hinata cried. She knew what that was!

Mito stood there for a little bit, waiting for them to finish plotting in the distance. For the first time, she witnessed them arguing. Shino, it seemed, took a commanding role which was something that Kiba didn't like. Hinata was pleading with them (and stuttering a lot) to stop and agree to virtually any kind of strategy, it sounded like.

Mito scowled and waited for as long as she had patience. "Well if that's how you're gonna act, how about something a little different, hmm? Ninja art: the summoning jutsu. She bit her thumb and VERY quickly raced through the normal seals. They'd better never do this without supervision and a contract. Boar → Dog → Bird → Monkey → Ram. "Kuchiyose no jutsu!"

*POOF* *POOF* *POOF*

"No," Shino seemed to breathlessly demand. He was the only one calm enough to speak! Hinata looked like she'd pass out and Kiba's expression was one of disbelief. They were all clutching each other. "Run!"

Run they did.

Kei, Tora, and Ana looked to their summoner and shrugged before trotting/slinking off toward Training Ground 44. Mito followed them. There was a barrier there that would keep ALL of them out of the worst part of that hellhole. Mito had re-investigated her markers for it this morning. She figured that she might as well sweep the area again before the kids came closer to it so she made some more clones to help out. "You guys can eat any animals you find here - except for the humans, ya know."

In the meantime, Hinata took a deep breath once she was fairly sure they were safe. "Those must be Mito-sensei's partners…"

"So they probably won't hurt us," Kiba added shakily, desperately hoping that was the case.

Shino raised an eyebrow at that. "Would your clan's partners hurt anyone?" Idiot?

"Only enemies," Kiba exclaimed.

"D-did you see w-what th- they were wearing?" Hinata asked, beginning to get excited the more she considered it. The boys shook their heads at her, although Shino asked if she meant the Konoha vests the oversized cats were wearing. "No! Th-th-they had on ha-harnesses! With little flags?"

"What?" Kiba asked. "No, they didn't!"

"The flags were down," Hinata insisted without stuttering.

"So our task is to retrieve the flags." Shino felt rather sick. Those animals - summons - were big and their teeth and claws were… also big! "We need to plan. Mito-sensei tried to heal us. Why would she do that? It is because we will probably have to fight at full capacity to get those flags."

Kiba made a rather pathetic noise. "Maybe we can just ask her for them? Or ask the cats?"
Cats? Gross!

Hinata poked her fingers together. "M-maybe we can!"


"They're co-o-o-o-o-ming!" Kei sang.

"Just remember, they're my cubs now," Mito cautioned them. She made three more clones to better keep an eye on each of her Genins from high in the trees. Kei and Tora took off after them on the ground but Ana stayed with her. She'd chosen the three most laid-back cats for this little training exercise and had promised them lots of snacks afterward.

Ana watched the cub approach. She treated him like the prey he was. She sprung, landing with her front paws on his shoulders, and snarled.

After a few breathless moments, Shino wiggled his nose, adjusting his glasses, and tried to control his body's reaction to having all of this weight (and power and teeth!) over him. It was a strange feeling to be so terrified while his allies were calm. "M-may I have your flag please, Ll-ioness-sama?" he asked politely - it came out as just a whisper. The Lioness looked toward where Mito was hiding and shrugged.

Mito facepalmed.

Ana lay down on the ground and allowed Shino to remove the ridiculous belt Mito put on her before dispelling to go home for a while.

Shino opened it and found only a blank sheet of paper. "I do not understand." He turned the paper over and found a very small seal. Slightly grinning under his coat, he pushed his chakra into it and found a code. "It's incomplete." Adjusting his glasses, he frowned.


.

Kiba closed his eyes and prayed that his sensei was somewhere around to save him, as embarrassing as that was to admit even to himself. "Hello, um. Tiger-san. Umm, may I have your scroll, er- flag?"

Tora sat down. Mito hadn't said anything about the cub just asking for it. "May I have a snack?" Man, he was really looking forward to Funyuns. He started drooling just thinking about it and noticed the puppy back up behind its dog-like master. "What?"

"You can't have Akamaru!"

"Yip yip!"

Tora didn't understand. "What's an Akamaru? Is it food?"

"NO," Kiba yelled. The giant tiger pulled back his head as if he'd hurt his ears. "Fine! We'll fight you!"

Tora tilted his head, wondering if saying such a thing before attacking was a good policy. It didn't seem like it was. He yawned widely while the kid started counting. Mito's clone was beside herself, trying not to laugh at them from a tree.

"...Three: Gatsuga!"

"Oh crap!" Off the tiger romped, also finding the whole thing hilarious. After dodging around watching the dog-boy bash through some trees as he tried to get him, he figured he might be a little dangerous so he swatted him down with his paw. "Uh-oh."

He'd knocked him out! At least the kid had a big coat on to drag him around with. He looked at the puppy and hoped that he hadn't hurt him. Dropping the puppy's (now tiger-drool-covered) body on his partner, he began dragging them into the forest to Mito.

He cocked his head as he noticed another group of cubs screaming and freaking out on the other side of Mito's barrier. Oh, well.

"Asuma-sensei! That tiger's gonna eat Kiba-kun!"

"Hmm. I guess Kiba-kun shouldn't have gotten caught then."

"We have to stop it!"

"Do we really, though?"


A kunai in one hand, Hinata approached the very overgrown lynx warily. She'd nearly gnawed through her bottom lip but chewing on it was the only way she could force herself to move forward. He turned toward her with intelligent eyes and waited until she was very close and then took off running. Hinata looked for either of her teammates for help - she'd also believed that she'd have to fight him, not chase him. Maybe we should've done this together?

Three cats, three Genins: that had been their thought at the time. They should've known that they needed to approach this differently: together!

"Byakugan!" Using her dojutsu, she soon found Shino - who was reading a paper! Yes, she had been right: this was their task! She found Kiba and gasped. She took off running toward him, hoping that she wouldn't be too late when the lynx jumped in front of her. It opened its mouth and talked?

"You were the only one who didn't fight Mito." His summoner jumped down behind him. "Good luck!" He bounced up into a low tree branch.

Mito looked more frightening than the big cat as she stared down at her student. "Fight me, Hinata."

Mito chose a soft opening stance and wondered if the girl would comply or if she'd have to make the first move. "You won't be placed on my team if you don't show me what you've got, young lady." Hinata took a deep breath and moved into what was clearly the Academy's taijutsu stance. "No. I want to fight against the Hyuuga style. …No one passes my test if you don't fight."

Hinata nodded once, a little angry for her teammates who had chosen to fight but might lose out on the chance to begin their careers because of her. Guilt hit her hard as it so often did.

BUT! She'd tried before but she wouldn't fail her teammates! "Byakugan!" She felt her lips pull up on one side: Mito-sensei had moved very close to her. "You are in the range of my divi- Oh!" Mito had hit her - or smacked her hand!

"I'm in range, am I not? Is that what you were saying?"

"Hai," She began again and got a hit! "Two palms, Four palms, Eight palms, Sixteen palms." Hinata gasped, breathing hard, when Mito popped. A shadow clone?! She shrieked when the lynx jumped on top of her. She gave it a juken strike and felt terrible when it moaned and rolled over.

"Nice one, Hinata," the real Mito said as she jumped out of the tree she was hiding in. "I substituted with my clone: I do that a lot, you'll find." She was already checking Kei out. "Do you think you can help me with this? He's really hurting!" Hinata eagerly nodded and, reactivating her byakugan, shakily pressed her fingers into the lynx's blocked tenketsu.

"Be confident, girly," Mito ordered. Hinata nodded and unblocked the tenketsu she'd hit.

"Thank you - and you owe me for this, Mito." Kei glared at her as he moved to leave.

"Wait," Hinata exclaimed and then looked like she'd pass out again. "Ano. M- may I have the scroll you have on your back."

"It's a flag: get it off!"

Mito slumped. "They really hate belts. I hadn't realized how much until now." She turned around and walked off and soon Kei tried to knock her feet. "Watch it, you!"

"No," Kei laughed. "She hit me hard! -It was real sharp!"

"I'm glad," Mito said, smiling to herself.

"You suck."


Three Genins looked at their scrolls after Shino threw water on top of Kiba and Akamaru to wake them up. All three felt more and more irritated as they decoded the scrolls after putting them together.

"Is this really a grocery list?" Kiba asked. He and the others jumped when a kunai flew by him and their sensei appeared between them again in a flash of teleportation.

Mito's hands raced through seals and she prayed she'd get this right. "Shinobi art five: genjutsu." Shino and Hinata immediately dispelled the genjutsu and realizing Kiba hadn't, they pushed their chakra into him, too. –Just as Akamaru bit him. Kiba gacked and pulled out his kunai, his heart beating wildly. His weird sensei was smiling at him and looked excited.

"What d'ya see?" Kiba blinked at her and his mouth had fallen open. Mito tilted her head and grinned at him. "In the genjutsu?!"

"Oh, um…" Kiba's cheeks were dusting pink under his tattoos. He was not telling! "Something' uh- smelled bad."

"That was it?" Mito asked in disgrace. The fact that she never knew whether her genjutsus worked or not was so embarrassing. "Never mind. And did I hear that you guys decoded my list?"

Shino handed it over but Kiba was the one who told her what they thought it was. "So are we supposed to get your groceries now?"

Mito grinned. From what she'd seen, Genins did a lot of grocery shopping and deliveries in the village. "This isn't just a grocery list; it's important stuff: especially for your future career with me, 'ttebane." Mito then winced; she hadn't meant for the tick to slip out. "Hey, you guys did good!"

-Funyuns

-Dango

-Flamin' Hot Cheetos &/or Takis

-Nacho Cheese-flavored Doritos

-Popcorn

-Fish and french fries

-Froot Loops

-Raw Meat

-BBQ-flavored chips

-Pork rinds

-Nuts, shredded carrots, and banana

'Ruto-chan landed on her head and bounced up so Mito could put a white washcloth on top of her head, between them. Her Genins looked at them in disbelief. "Ah, this is 'Ruto-chan." She pulled out a couple of seals and set them down on the ground while the parrot sat tight. Plopping down, she used the seal to dispel all of her clones, releasing the purple barrier she put up. Pushing chakra into the scrolls, a bunch of food and water flew out of them. Oops.

She'd overloaded them again.

Kei and Tora were immediately on them. Tora grabbed the bag of Funyuns and shook it violently, sending the snacks flying everywhere before beginning to gobble them up. The Genins had tried to jump up to shake the gross little things off of them, but it was too late: Tora had gobbled some off of Kiba's lap. Mito laughed at the horrified expression on his face while Akamaru seemed torn between barking at Tora and wanting to gobble up all of the food. Kei lay down in the middle of it all, lazily munching on a plate of old french fries.

"Thanks for not making these," the lynx said with a grin. Mito turned bright red.

Her cooking was getting better, dammit!

She cleared her throat and began handing out healthy snacks and water to her Genins. "Make sure that you always carry food in your scrolls along with supplements and a water bottle or jug or whatevs that's HANDY on your person at all times, alright?"

"Itadakimasu," the Genins said quietly and began eating. Shino was surprised that Mito offered him something she called a "Lemon Crumble for your allies, ya know."

"Ano… Does th-this mean we passed y-your test?" Hinata asked shyly. Kiba subtly passed her some of his cheese without looking at her. Oh, I do love cheese! Thank you, Kiba-kun!

"Oh yeah. No problems there." Mito smiled as Kiba cheered, Hinata smiled bigger than she'd ever seen the girl do so before, and Shino nodded, fisting his hands and pulling them back - almost as if he wanted to cheer, too. "Congrats, guys: we're Team 8." She leaned back and ate some of the "Lemon Crumble" Pie-thing Momo-san gave her this morning. "What up, Asuma?"

"You owe me."

"For what?" Mito asked, genuinely confused. She raised an eyebrow at his Genins who had helped themselves to her (and her summons') snacks.

"Asuma!" 'Ruto-chan repeatedly chirped - his wings flapping excitedly.

Asuma glared at the parrot. "You keep your mouth shut around the Genins, Bird. And YOU," Asuma hissed, turning to his sister, "you left me with your tab."

"Ohhhhh," Mito said, unsuccessfully trying to hide a grin. "Okay. It wasn't my fault! Monkey dragged me off before I finished…" Pranking you is what she wanted to say. "I guess I can pay you back, though: it's a good day after all, ne?"

Asuma dropped to the ground beside her, guessing that she was right: sort of.

After introductions were made, the two senseis watched their Genins talk with each other for a while. Shikamaru was VERY quietly talking to Shino about something; Choji was laughing at the things Kiba said and occasionally petting Akamaru who was sitting in Kiba's lap. Kiba had kibbles in his hand that the puppy seemed pleased enough with. Considering all the food around, he seemed very well-trained.

Ino was chatting a silent, wide-eyed (and pink-faced) Hinata's head off and all of them were only a little wary of the big lynx and giant tiger who were both romping around, play-fighting each other every now and then when they weren't sniffing around.

Asuma glared at his kunoichi student when he heard "Sasuke-kun" and "Forehead" being brought up again. If Mito can set her crazy summons loose, so can I. "Ino-chan, if you don't stop talking about 'Sasuke-kun and Forehead,' I'm gonna sic my summons on you."

Ino clicked her tongue and shook her hair over one way. "Asuma-sensei," she grinned as she flipped her bangs back and sat up more, settling her hands on her hips. "You can't get in the way of true love!"

"Kuchiyose no jutsu. SPIDERMAN: get the blonde girl."

Ino shrieked when Spiderman jumped on her head and began pulling her hair every which way. Asuma and Mito high-fived each other.

"Alright, Spiderman; that's enough. Ino-chan," Asuma ordered, clearing his throat and appreciating Mito giving the little spider monkey/nightmare some berries. "Every time you bring up the Uchiha kid that's not mission-oriented, Spiderman's gonna pay you a nasty little visit."

Mito nodded, getting excited about it. "I can create a seal so that if she even mentions Sasuke-kun, Spiderman will be right there!"

"That's not fair," Ino cried, trying to get her hair in order. She pulled a fairly large brush out of her weapons pouch and Mito fell back on the ground, groaning.

"Weapons are supposed to be in there, girly; not your hair care products!" Mito noticed Kurenai approaching and waved at her from the ground. "So your kiddos passed, too?"

"Fairly easily, actually," Kurenai said with a soft smile. She hid the way she beamed when she heard two of her students whispering that her test wasn't easy at all. "They refused to fight each other while in my genjutsus."

"Until she tricked us into thinking she was an Iwa nin," Sora complained. He gave Mito a quick side-hug.

Kurenai sat down and took the snacks Mito offered her and her Genins. She thought it was funny the way that the kunoichi always had loads of food on her. "Asuma-sensei, Mito-sensei, these are the Genins of Team 11: Sora-kun, Torune-kun, and Sai-kun."

"Nice to meet you all."

"You are Dumb-dumb's sister," Sai said with a weird smile.

Mito's smile turned into something that made her look a little deranged. "And you are now my enemy, I guess." Asuma threw a piece of cheese at her.

What a weird team for Kurenai, Mito thought as she chuckled and observed the Genins. Maybe she was missing something. Time will tell, I guess. She fiddled around in her vest and pulled out a pack of chakra papers. Asuma's eyes went wide - he didn't look happy at all - but Kurenai looked excited. "Have any of you ever used this before? This is Chakra Induction Paper and it's used to find out one's elemental affinity." She held a single piece up and it immediately split and dripped water from both sides.

"Mito-chan," Asuma whispered quietly, hoping to stop this. What she was doing meant more work and questions - and he already had a lazybones, a fangirl, and a chubby, shy, pacifist to correct.

"There are five elemental chakra natures, ya see - aside from yin and yang release - which are the foundations of all elemental ninjutsus. Each of the five big countries is named after one of 'em." Mito pointed a single finger up as she spoke but continued to raise her fingers as she went through the five. All of the kids were very attentive. "If your primary element is Wind, this paper will tear. If it's Water, it will get wet. Anyone Lightning-natured will see their paper crinkle up, and if you're Earth-natured, the paper will turn to dirt and crumble. Hi no Kuni has the largest number of those who are predominantly Fire-natured. If your primary element is Fire, your paper will burn."

"Each element is weaker or stronger than another:

Fire is strong against Wind - but weak against Water.

Wind is strong against Lightning - but weak against Fire.

Lightning is strong against Earth - but weak against Wind.

Earth is strong against Water - but weak against Lightning.

And finally, Water is strong against Fire - but weak against Earth!"

"Makes sense, right?! Anyway, a technique with a weaker nature CAN still overpower one with a stronger, opposing nature if the weaker one is of a higher level. For example…"

Asuma dropped back to the ground as he listened to the Human Encyclopedia go on and on and on. He could tell that the kids were getting itchy to get their hands on her chakra papers and would've groaned, had he not seen the very approving, very pretty smile on Kurenai's face as she nibbled on snacks and nodded every now and then at what Mito was saying. God help me. Women are going to drive me crazy and force me to work harder.


.


After dismissing her Genins, (and handing them a list of medical terms to memorize,) and repaying Asuma - it seemed like a lot of ryo he'd said I owed him - Mito flagged her shadow, Hideki, into a dark alleyway. Leaning on the wall of a building between trash cans, she asked him what had happened the night before.

Hideki pulled his mask up and sighed. "You were getting drunk."

"And?" Mito asked. "There were a lot of people getting drunk."

"Yeah," he agreed before kicking a pebble hard enough that it cracked the side of the building across from them. He winced. He didn't want to admit the truth: he might be a little overprotective of the girl; no, the woman he'd watched grow from a nearly bald newborn whenever he'd been around.

"I don't wanna wear it," a very tiny Mito had pouted.

"It's a fox mask! I know you love foxes best, chibi-chan," Hideki grinned.

"I'm not small," the little girl pouted, but - with his instructions - she attached it to her face with chakra.

"OH! So pretty, Mito-chan!"

"Really?! You promise?"

Mito sighed. "I've been told - OFTEN - that I'm safe in my home village and don't need to be quite so paranoid, Aniki. –You're going to make me think I'm not."

Hideki sighed and gave her a deadpan look. "You're being manipulative."

Mito huffed. No kidding. I'm trying to get you to back off! "So? …You know I don't need a guard."

Hideki frowned. "You're a high-priority target, Mito-chan: be reasonable. Hokage-sama would flip if you were taken. We'd have a war on our hands!"

Mito considered that. "You really think so?" she asked quietly. Hideki gave her a look as if he thought she might be a complete idiot. She crossed her arms over her chest in response. "I'm gonna live my life as I see fit, Hideki-nii. I'm," she laughed awkwardly, "actually sorry that I'm your assignment, really."

Hideki shrugged. "I don't mind - and I get to go home to my family most nights with this particular assignment, thank you very much! And you're not guarded 24/7," he lied. "Why don't you come over for dinner? Play with Kono-kun: he's such a brat. You two should get along great."

"Alright," Mito agreed, running her hand through her hair which she'd let loose after dismissing her Genins. "Later this week?"

"Whenever!" He thought more about that and grimaced as he put his mask back on. "Considering how much you eat, let me know at least a day in advance."

"Jerk! I eat like a bird: everyone knows that!"

"Ha!"


.


The Namikaze family celebrated Naruto's promotion to full Genin that night over a very festive dinner - which Momo-san the chef finally joined them for. Naruto opened his gifts (Mito gave him a set of non-orange clothes with their clan crest on them, and an orange teddy bear that had vital areas X-marked in red. Her father thought it was horrible but both Mito and Naruto thought it was hilarious AND creepy.)

After food and presents, Naruto began telling them all about Kakashi's bell test.

It was hard for Mito to hear anything other than the blood rushing in her ears after one, early part of it. Her father had put his head in his hands when he heard about it. When the kunoichi was sure no one was speaking - and she knew they were looking at her strangely - she asked for verification of what she'd just heard. "Naruto. –Did you say that," she cleared her throat, trying to swallow the lump that came up there. "Did you say that Hatake-san 'put his fingers up (your) ass, jutsuing you like a damn perv?'"

Naruto nodded. "Yeah - it hurt and sent me flying, 'ttebayo. He's a total perv."

"Naruto," Minato began and tried not to laugh. Mito, however, had flashed away. "Oh, my. …I think your elder brother is in a lot of trouble, Naruto."

"Awesome! I hope she gets that good for nothin' Kaka-SENSEI good!"