Chapter Six

Justin hurried after Allie, wondering where the moment had gone. In one second she was in his arms and they'd been about to kiss. Another second and she'd been rushing back toward her car and taking her hand from his.

He jogged after her, his arms suddenly feeling vacant, and he realized that it was because they were. She was not in them.

"Allie!" he shouted. "What's wrong?"

She stopped, only for a split second, to say, "I'm sorry. I just… realized something." She looked as confused as he as she approached her car, grabbing her keys out of her pocket and fiddling with them, her hands shaking as she tried to unlock her doors.

Justin put his hands over hers and took them from the keys, forcing her to look him in the eye. "I'm being serious. I'm not being sarcastic. I just… I want you to tell me what just happened." He looked away, knowing very well what had occurred. He'd tried to kiss her and scared her away in the process.

Allie shook her head, pulling away from him. "Justin, I can't get attached to anyone here. I have to go back to college."

He was confused. "So soon? I thought you didn't have to go back for another two months."

"I don't," she replied sadly. "But what's the point in creating something we'll just have to destroy when I have to go away again? I refuse to make it painful for myself… or you."

Justin enveloped her into his arms once again. "I'm sorry."

"You'd better be sorry. You're tearing my resolution to bits as we speak," Allie whispered into his ear. She was trying to sarcastic and reserved, but he could tell her statement was true, but he didn't pull back.

"Allie…"

She ducked out from under his arms and looked at him seriously. "Justin, it's only been three weeks. You haven't seen me for two years. I went on a mission's trip last summer for most of the time I was out of college. And all of a sudden when I come back you decide you're attracted to me? There's got to be something wrong with that… we can't start a relationship off of three weeks."

"I've known you all throughout high school, Allie."

"You knew me throughout the last part of high school. The Allie before that was shy and embarrassed, intimidated by your teasing and cynicism."

"I know you now, Allie. I'm sure of it. Why can't we have just these two months… the only way I'm going to get to know you better is if I spend more time with you."

"I can't do that. I'm just going to hurt your feelings and mine. I can't pretend like everything is perfect when it's not. I can't play make-believe, like I'm done with college and I'm ready to start a relationship, because I'm not. I'm not willing to be attached to you and put myself and you through pain we can both do without. Two months of fun and romance might be great, but I don't think it will be worth two years of pain."

Justin watched her face harden until it was expressionless. He'd just ruined her fun-loving and cheerful personality. Now she would be nothing but serious around him. She might return his one-liners, but never with the same vigor or teasing attitude as before. It would probably never be the same.

And as she drove away, the glare of her lights backing out of his driveway with a sense of finality, he knew that she was right. At the end of their two months, this same moment would replay itself. Except the pain in his heart and the sense of loss would be ten times as strong.