9.35pm
Mousse snickered to himself as he locked up the front windows and exited the building. He may have loathed the dried-up monkey, but even he had had to applaud how utterly pissed she was able to make Saotome through the simple expedient of a nickname.
He resumed talking to himself and he went through his foolproof plan to be done with Saotome… and by extension, claim Shampoo. He'd gone over the scheme (aloud - there had been much sweatdropping, but Mousse hadn't noticed) in the Nekohanten as well, and couldn't find a lick wrong with it then either.
Self recrimination and reason melted away as his childhood fantasy materialised before him.
Alternating between jaunty whistling and sinister snickering, the myopic lad skipped happily down the street, towards his home, thoughts of his darling Shampoo, forefront in his currently one-track mind.
---
"Would ya give it a rest already?" Sniffing, Cologne shook her head.
"You've really got to develop a sense of humour, Ranma. Don't be afraid to laugh at yourself every now and then," she advised.
"Why bother," snorted the redhead, "when I've so many others to do it for me?" Eyes narrowed, the Elder responded,
"Ah, but don't try to tell me that you didn't have fun tonight."
"No!" insisted the girl.
"Really?" she asked laconically.
"Nope! No fun whatsoever."
"Is that so?"
"Okay, so maybe a little…"
"Just a little?"
"Alright! A lot. Happy?"
"A lot?"
"Will you quit already? Okay; a hell of a lot! In fact, I probably enjoyed myself more tonight since when Ucchan and me were little kids, alright?" Smirking, the crone drawled,
"You do realize you're telling the truth, don't you?" Arms akimbo, Ranma indignantly replied,
"So?"
"Think about it."
Ranma did.
"Crap."
"Yep."
"I don't suppose you'll need a part time waitress?"
"We'll work something out."
---
"Thanks a lot, Nabiki," grumbled Akane to herself. "Let's see," she said, making a surprisingly good effort in imitating her older sister's careless 'know-it-all' drawl, "Ranma's working his poor hands to the bone. And all for your sake, Akane." She dropped the impersonation and griped impotently. "Could she be any more vague?"
Yet, it did tell her something. Although Nabiki had likely sexed it up, it was apparent that Ranma was out doing something for her.
Now that she thought about it, that meant that Ranma had missed dinner for her. Not what many would regard as the greatest sacrifice, but not many understood Ranma's priorities as well as those with whom he lived. Her fiancé knowingly foregoing a Kasumi-made repast could almost be compared to another person taking a severe beating for her sake.
That thought, combined with some other anonymous sacrifice he was making – some secret mission, she supposed, smirking at the corniness of her own thoughts – sent her stomach a flutter. Feeling a spontaneous urge, she moved to and rifled through her cassette drawer. Her English might not be perfect, but she understood the chorus well enough… Quickly finding the tape she sought, she plopped it into her the deck of her CD system.
Despite feeling silly, she began humming flightily to herself in time with the music. Anybody looking in her window wouldn't miss the dumb smile on her face. Almost unconsciously, Akane began to sing.
---
Kasumi exited her room in full readiness save in dress, when she noticed her younger sister spying on her youngest sister. She was about to scold her in a mildly reprimanding tone, when she remembered that nobody else was present. She crept closer to her motionless sibling.
"What's she doing Biki?" whispered the tall girl. Showing no surprise at her appearance, Nabiki answered Kasumi with a toothy grin. She motioned for her to approach, while she moved slightly away from the slight opening in the door.
---
9.44pm
"Night, Natsu-chan. See you in the morning, bright and early."
"Goodnight, Ukyo-san," replied the shinobi as he bade his employer goodbye. Closing the front door as he left, Ukyo turned around to the source of her current discomposure, sitting silently on a stool by the counter. "Well?"
"Er…well?" repeated Ryoga intelligently.
"I don't believe in fate," stated Ukyo suddenly steeping closer to the travel-worn boy.
"Um, okay. If that works for you…"
"What I do believe in however," she said fiddling with a mini-spatula in her hand, "is opportunity." Ryoga continued to stare at her expectantly. "You got any decent clothes in that pack of yours?" Blinking, he answered sheepishly,
"Well, ah, most of my good clothes are at home." Ukyo rolled her eyes.
"Okay you can borrow some of mine."
"WHAT?"
"My guy clothes, jackass. Geez," she mumbled. Ryoga nodded, staring absently out a window then quickly turned to Ukyo.
"Wait a minute. Why?"
"Because you and I are going out," she rejoined casually.
"We're...going out?" She nodded. "Together?"
"Yep."
"The two of us?"
"Uh huh."
"As in…" he questioned, his hand moving to his face, "a date?" She pondered that a moment and smirked at his expression.
"I suppose you could call it that." He paled.
"B-but, Akari…"
"Oh, get your head out of the gutter," she ordered. "I just felt like a change of pace, and I didn't want to give Natsu-chan the any false hope. And then you showed up. Call it my new mantra, 'when opportunity presents itself, take it.'"
"You mean 'motto'."
"They're the same thing," she replied flatly.
"Not exactly. You see, you'll have to use your new motto for some time before it becomes your mant-."
"Whatever, sensei."
"So you don't want to… with me?" asked Ryoga unable to give detailed voice to his concerns.
"Please!" muttered Ukyo. She glanced at his unflinching expression. "That's a 'no'."
"Oh, thank god," he breathed.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean!"
---
"I guess you were right, Kaz," admitted the shorter of the pair. "Even if my teeth are rotting from the sweetness of what we've just witnessed, it really was worth imouto-chan paying after all."
Kasumi 'hmphed' at the implication that she could have possibly been mistaken.
"You can't play the omniscient, benevolent mother-figure as long as I have without picking up something," pointed out the tall girl.
"Two bad that something was so small," smirked Nabiki. "You don't want to be late again like today. Dad wanted to send out as search party. You ready to go? " she asked, indicating the black leather bag and other items strewn about her older sister's large bed.
"Everything but my work clothes," answered the bed's owner, already easily slipping out of her dress.
Only one other citizen of Nerima would have failed to be surprised by the sight of the paired rows of granite-hard hillocks that ran down the length of Kasumi's abdomen.
Grumbling in mock discontent, and mild jealousy, Nabiki nodded at her sister's physique.
"You know, that's really unfair," commented the short-haired girl. Kasumi snorted noisily as she stepped into a pair of combat fatigues. "Do you know how little people are able to maintain a body like that?"
"Same as big people, I suppose," shrugged the taller girl. "They work out."
"To quote you beloved sister, trè s drole," Nabiki absently recalled, before continuing. "Don't you feel its an injustice that I have to work so much harder than you to keep myself in top shape."
"Curiosity demands," rejoined Kasumi's muffled voice from beneath a heavy sweater, "that I ask if you actually believe that you," her tone dripping with derision, "are in 'top shape'."
"Screw you, Kaz," she swore in response. Bending over to secure her heavy boots, Kasumi lolled out her tongue and licked her incisors provocatively.
"If you ask nicely."
The sultry voice proved too much for Nabiki, as she fell over backwards, the mattress coming to her rescue.
Her fall having resolved into guffaws, Nabiki eventually removed the hand she used to prevent alerting the entire house of her mirth.
"Oh man, that was good." Kasumi 'hmphed' again, this time in feigned disappointment.
"To think you find my generous offer amusing."
"Hell, incest aside, if I ever decide I swing that way, I'll give you first refusal." She looked Kasumi up and down. "You about ready?"
"Damn, Biki. And here I thought you were checking me out," she drawled as she adjusted a shoulder strap.
"They'd eat you alive in boot camp, you know?" Kasumi deigned not to respond. "Well seeing as you're going to spend all night getting your strap-on," she snickered. Kasumi rolled her eyes, and motioned with her free hand for Nabiki to get on with it, which she did. "We may as well get back on topic. I may not be in the same shape as you,"
"Or league," added the older girl helpfully.
"Whatever," dismissed Nabiki. "But what is damn unfair is that I have to work twice as hard to stay half as fit as you."
"It's a gift."
"I couldn't agree more. And what is a gift but something you didn't earn?"
"Piss on you, Biki," growled the pony-tailed girl.
"Not even if you ask nicely."
"Who says I'm asking?"
Making a production of glimpsing at her watch Nabiki intoned,
"Plan on leaving while we're young, Usagi?"
"Keep it up," she suggested. "You'll have a scat fetish when I'm through with you."
"At this pace, I'll have died of bedsores before then."
Kasumi finished securing her gear, and picked up the deceptively heavy leather bag with ease. She approached and opened the window, with a quick announcement.
"Well, I'm off."
"At a leisurely pace," griped her companion.
"Be safe, Biki."
"Safe, Kaz," she agreed.
---
"I can't work those hours!" exclaimed the irate redhead, back in her usual attire. "I'd have to roof hop straight from school."
"Don't think you're up to it, daughter-in-law?" Ranma reigned in her anger, and answered,
"Of course I'm up to it. Its, well, just…"
"There's no shame if you think it's too much for you."
"Hey!" complained the girl to about the only adult female in Nerima shorter than her, other than the evil old washerwoman.
"I'm simply being honest…"
"It's just that…" mumbled Ranma in a small voice.
"And now it's your turn."
"Okay, okay," she submitted. "If I do that, when… when am I going to get any time to... spend with friends, like 'Roshi and Dai… and um, Akane?"
"Ranma?" asked the wizened old figure.
"Y-yeah?"
"That's both very sweet, and startlingly mature of you," she grinned.
"Really?" blurted the girl. "Thanks!"
"But there's a flaw in your reasoning."
"Yeah?"
"Those are your weekend hours."
"…Oh."
"Yes."
"You really want to hit me with your cane right now, don't'cha?"
"Would you mind?" asked Cologne hopefully.
"Has that ever stopped you before?"
"Thank you, Ranma."
---
10.14pm
"Don't worry. All my decent guy-clothes are sized to fit me while I'm wearing shoulder pads. They'll be fine on you."
"I dunno…" mumbled Ryoga cautiously. "What about pants?"
"What about them?" asked the chef curtly.
"Well, I'm taller than you."
"Are not," quickly countered the girl. Ryoga blink-blinked.
"Er…yes I am," stated Ryoga quickly stepping into his companion's personal space. "See," he said, looking down at her. "I've got at least four inches on you."
"Whatever," she sniffed, and then blushed when she realized how close he was still standing. "Ryoga?" she questioned. Said Lost Boy only now noticing the close quarters, 'yipped' and hopped backward several feet.
"Anyway," began Ryoga, trying to steer the situation away from… well, just away, he thought. "What gave you the idea you were my height?" Blush receding like a frightened prairie dog, Ukyo turned a frosty gaze to the fanged boy.
"Are you saying I'm short?"
"W-well, no," he answered. "I mean not for a girl," he continued failing to notice Ukyo's glare. Then he did notice it. "Eh-heh…" he sweated.
He wouldn't have suspected that Ukyo would had had height issues. She was actually fairly tall for a girl. Kasumi was the only girl he knew in any real capacity who was taller than her, and she was a woman. It was not as though she would have been teased or any…thing.
Then he realised. Ukyo had been raised a boy from the age of six. Of course she'd have been teased. But heck, compared to teasing he had received as a kid for his navigational 'difficulties', she had probably had it easy.
Hmm, he pondered, deciding that no personality was complete without a complex or two. Pity Ukyo's all happened to stem from the same thing.
Now that was new. When had he become so insightful? Guess all those hours wandering alone with only his own thoughts for company had finally resulted in something positive.
-CLANG!-
Of course, there was the drawback that he'd sometimes coast away into his thoughts even while he was in somebody's company, as his new spatula-induced headache attested.
"I said stop daydreaming, numbnuts!" demanded Ukyo when he turned his slightly glazed-over eyes to the brunette.
"Sorry," he apologized sheepishly. "Sometimes I just drift off…" he said lamely.
"Yeah, yeah," she huffed half-heartedly. She threw him a dark pair of pants. "Those are practically new," she said when he plucked them from the air. "I never wore them, because…"
Sensing he shouldn't allow this to end without a conclusion, he gently prodded,
"Because?"
"Because, because they were too long for me, alright?"
"No problem," he answered easily. "Besides, I think you'd look a lot better in that dress," he commented referring to the garment she was holding. She glanced down, and slowly a wry smile spread across her face.
"Ryoga?"
"Uh, yes?" he replied nervously, hoping he hadn't overstepped the bounds of proprietary.
"Weak. But thanks for trying."
Relieved, he awkwardly sighed, "You're welcome."
"But you're still not getting any."
The Lost Boy concluded that remaining silent would be wisest course of action.
---
"I must say, Ranma, tonight has been fun," chirped the ancient crone as she accompanied her new employee out of the restaurant.
"Amazing as it is, I gotta agree with you. Who'da thunk it, old ghoul?" smirked the busty redhead.
"Keep that up daughter-in-law, and tomorrow you'll be getting the jobs I used to give Mr. Part-Time to distract him from Shampoo."
"Can dish it out, but can't take it yourself?" Cologne suddenly deflated.
"Point taken, Ranma. My apologies. Good night, my boy." Before she could re-enter the building, Ranma quickly blurted out,
"Oh yeah! You just reminded me. I need to talk with you about Mousse as well."
"Mousse?" repeated the Amazon, raising an eyebrow. "Alright, but that is for tomorrow. Right now, I have to entertain."
"No worries," replied Ranma, agreeably, leaping to a nearby roof. An orange streetlight lit up her features, and threw stark shadows over some of her face. This had the effect of highlighting her dimpled cheeks as she smiled down. "Later, old ghoul," she laughed liltingly with a wink for the gnarled figure perched upon her equally gnarled staff. The redhead then bounded away too fast for the untrained eye to follow.
"Goodnight," she answered the darkness, "Ranma."
