TW : This chapter contains intense themes and scenes of unaliving
Song Listened To :
JENOVA from Final Fantasy VII Advent Children (first half)
*Chapter 15*
In the slip of night, in the very silent budge Gideon took into Throttle's old, lovely abode on palace grounds, Gideon was given the go-ahead, from Wren, to not only let himself inside of his and Throttle's Sugar Rush abode, but also very hesitantly agreed to Lash and Penny tagging along. With this, Lash and Penny apprehensively tailed Gideon through Throttle's warm, dark home. They knew Wren would likely be in Throttle's study, it was a place that Wren had been frequenting a lot lately; the crew chalked it up to the notion that it was a dark, quite library-like den, a cave with little full-room light sources. As Gideon cautiously moved through Throttle's home, with Lash and Penny silently shuffling with him, he came to the gape of Throttle's den, the entrance that only barely peaked through a near-orange glow of a weathered desk lamp. Gideon held his breath and gently peeked inside as he held his hand out and behind him, to silently tell Penny and Lash to not join him inside Throttle's den temporarily. As Gideon caught with Wren's faced-away figure, across the way, Gideon scuffed his heels a little and made his presence a bit more known now. Even with this, Wren stood near Throttle's towering walls of bookcases, his hand aimlessly fiddled with the cigar holder cozily nestled atop a small side table, equally cozied up to a loved, dark leather lounge chair for reading. Wren's gaze was down at his hands, though with his aimless tinkering was an equally as aimless stare.
"Not you, too," Gideon mumbled lowly, playfully, he couldn't hear Lash and Penny in the hallway, something that he appreciated.
"Hmm?" Wren's deep voice hummed as he just barely perked up and tossed his eyes to Gideon's, in which Gideon's was concentrated on the cigar holder Wren was fiddling with. Wren finally scoffed a shaky laugh and shook his head, "Smoking? No, no... A joint here and there, a celebratory cigar, but no, not a habit."
"Got Turbo and Throttle trying to wrangle Lash and Nox into that nonsense, figured Throttle got to yah," Gideon teased kindly as both men held eyes, though Wren's toss of eye contact looked haggard, terrified, teary and forlorn. Gideon shook his head in the long bout of silence and finally shrugged, "... This is gunna be hard, my guy. It's gunna be hard."
Wren firmly looked off, nodded, grimaced in a crumple of hovering tears and sucked in a loud, shaky, nasally breath through his nose. Gideon frowned and looked down to his hands, he knew no amount of small talk could even barely cover the mountain of grief Wren was going through.
"It's gunna be hard," Gideon repeated gently, he took meandering, patient steps closer to Wren, "And... Lash and Penny are also ready to endure this difficulty with us. This is all going to be hard, I'm going to repeat it until I'm blue in the face."
Wren nodded again and sucked in a tiny grimace of a cry-hiccup he couldn't keep control of any longer. He covered his forehead and eyes with the gape of his palm and began to hunch in on himself with his back almost turned away from Gideon's approaching figure.
"But this is necessary. Painful conversations are necessary, holding fast to one another and enduring the pain, hand in hand, is necessary," Gideon soothed, and as he came into Wren's bubble, he knew Wren was due to exploding, he knew emotions would get very intense, he knew this was a task he'd be mediating for eventually, though he did whatever he could to set the tone and keep it. He neared Wren and cautiously rested his hand to the back of Wren's right shoulder as he patiently continued on in Wren's closer crumpling proximity, "I know you're hurting. I may not be in your shoes, and I may have endured hurt from Callum's choices, but I really need you to hear me when I say that I will do everything in my power to bring your little brother home."
"I miss him so much," Wren suddenly choked in a cry he could no longer contain, and with his full descent into crumpling, Gideon sucked in a patient breath and began to usher Wren into the encouraging gestures of offering a hug, a place to put all of his tears. Gideon was floored that Wren didn't hesitate, and with the gentle snug, Gideon wrangled his arms tight about Wren's shoulders, sprawled his wings and cocooned Wren into a huge scoop of safety. Wren fully unloaded into Gideon's chest, his deep cries reverberated throughout the den, he staggered to messily carry on through all the tears, "My whole family has been destroyed and ripped apart due to all of this."
"You're right, it's not pretty," Gideon hummed patiently with a nod, he lulled his eyes closed and warmly cupped the back of Wren's head and messy, stick-straight white-blond hair. Wren shook, he leaned nearly all of his body weight against Gideon's unwavering, firm stance and wrap of arms and wings and now wildly began to unload into Gideon's chest. Full sobbing, his body trembled, Gideon fluttered his eyes with the heart breaking stagger of choking Wren's trembling figure emit as he hesitantly carried on, equally becoming wrought with tears, "But, I promise... I promise it'll all be okay."
"You can't know that, he could be dead for all we know," Wren's deep voice officially cried out, he allowed himself to just lay in a firm sag of a lean against Gideon's unending care, Gideon squeezed his eyes shut and grappled Wren into a tighter hug as Wren's cries now became full wails of entire despair out into the universe. Such a hit of engorged, desperate sorrow had Gideon reeling what felt like a hit of blackened mirrors reminding him of the intense pain he felt inside of the dark web. He fluttered his teary eyes and could feel Wren's aura fervently warning Gideon that some sort of a mental collapse was on the way, thus proven with Wren's further press of dark, harrowing words all laced with the hoarse, desperate rasp of his groaning cries, "I don't want to endure this pain anymore, Gideon, just find it in your heart to take me out into the station and end my life, please... I'm begging you."
Gideon silently scoffed a breath of gasping surprise over Wren's shoulder and grit his teeth in a tight grimace of such a staggering, darkened notion of unadulterated horror.
"I don't want to be alive anymore, Gideon, I want it all to end," Wren hoarsely moaned out and over Gideon's shoulder in the desperate wails of defeat his deep voice allowed. Wren thumped the side of his head into Gideon's clavicle and allowed his upper body to sag even deeper into full defeat. He messily carried on through the clog of his nose, "Please do me the favor..."
Gideon now squeezed his eyes shut, felt the want of his impending, new last name echo loudly into the back of his brain and urgently engulfed Wren in a sudden chokehold of an exterior swap. Gideon flinched, tugged Wren deeper into his chest and suddenly felt the atmosphere around them whip into a whirlwind of gently tossed wind and drizzling rain. Gideon fluttered his eyes, sharply looked about and released Wren upon realizing they were at least safe to do so. Gideon perked up, assessed everything for what it was and very swiftly understood that this was Wren's lucid manifestations, everything in this raw lucid state was Wren's due to just how potent and aggressive his emotions were. Fervently noting any escape Gideon should take, he flinched and now understood the two were up incredibly high in the air, on some sort of a tall structure. This structure was rigid, huge, impossibly tall and made of solid grey brick. A few tattered flags nearby whipped in the wind, the darkened atmosphere about them was stormy and tumultuous, and though Gideon narrowed his gaze and could see lovely, fluffy, golden sunset clouds high on the horizon, he furrowed his eyebrows in a swing of further confusion and remembered Wren's harrowing words; he urgently peered to Wren across the gap created due to their silent observing and meandering.
"Gideon," Wren staggered sharply, his voice clipped the air, Gideon held his breath and peered hard to the side of Wren's now sweaty face. The wind whipped about his beautiful white hair, the scar down his left eyebrow furrowed with his tighter grimace. Gideon felt his heart sink in frozen, impending dread the second he could see Wren inching his footwork to the edge of the high post they were on, "C-Can... Can I game over in your lucid state and live to tell the tale?"
"Well, y-you are still inside of Sugar Rush," Gideon hummed, he tried to hide the shake in his voice, he outreached his hand and now began to feel terror plague him at the very gut-wrenching idea of Wren taking an eternal leap.
Although Gideon knew somehow Wren would be okay, he also was well aware none of them had ever tested anything like this. It was in this instance did Gideon swallow a huge gulp and briefly wonder if regeneration was something he could possibly swing, with his new powers. Still, he tried to take baby steps towards Wren so not to spark action, movement, any of which would send Wren cascading off of the sheer drop he was now loosely hovering nearly on top of. His hoarse, defeated voice pressed Gideon a darkened notion.
"Is this my imagination or yours?" Wren clumsily staggered, he eagerly peered down between his feet, which hung to the rigid edge of this incredible structure they stood atop; the ground could be seen, but it was certainly leagues down, through the haze of the rainy, dreary fog.
"Yours," Gideon did whatever he could to keep a neutral tone, for in this, he knew if Wren got riled enough, uncertainty would unfurl tenfold. With the state of Wren's current collapse, with the incredible tension about to be dolled Gideon's way, Gideon held his breath, peered down to the ground and surrounding area and suddenly felt sharp realization hit him between the eyes. Gideon raised his eyebrows, looked out to the grey, felt a cold wash come over him and almost dared to allow a scared smile to sprawl his face. He huffed a shaky notion to himself and felt almost delightful confusion plague him, "The tower..."
Out of a nightmare, new trauma Gideon wasn't prepared to be hit with, the only thing Gideon could see barely caught in the clip of his peripheral was Wren's figure almost happily and loosely sagging into the void, silently off the edge. Gideon sucked in a sharp inhale, choked, thrusted his hand out, lunged forward and clenched his teeth as hard as he could. A huge hit of confusion plagued him as he urgently yanked himself away from the edge, grappled his hair, whirled around to find the center of this tower's flat top and looked out to the cloudy, gorgeously grey abyss about him. Swirling clouds that began to pour down rain, Gideon felt a wave of assurance come to him, assurance that Wren could do whatever he wanted here and no harm would come to his physical self. He sighed a wildly trembling breath as tears immediately streamed his cheeks, he grimaced and could feel the wall of pain, that he had previously endured, come rushing back to him. In the rush of feeling entirely triggered, he sucked in a massively trembling breath and knew this was Wren's moment of collapse, this was Wren's opportunity to endure self destruction, it was something Gideon was now feeling honored that Wren felt as if this huge task was safe to accomplish inside of Gideon's care; thus, the reason why Gideon wasn't eagerly waiting to cushion Wren's collide on the ground.
Wren fluttered his eyes, allowed the dipping feeling of falling to swallow him whole, and in the mere seconds he had free-falling, he squeezed his eyes shut and ran through a million different hits of notions, all in such a tiny, cram-packed few seconds of intense headspace. Even with the half-hearted, uncertain confirmation from Gideon, that dying in Gideon's lucid space would likely be safe, Wren felt the crawl of intense, unmitigated regret just ruin every last little sparkle of happy embers he had left in his coding. Everything in him now began to scream and beg just why he had gone through with this, everything inside of these tiny seconds were seconds lived in parallel with the life he could genuinely have had he not left the ledge. Even with the sudden dip of a lifetime to think, inside these tiny seconds, the thought of Gideon coming to rescue him never once crossed his mind. He fluttered his tired, wet eyes closed, watched the ground get progressively closer and awaited the quick out. With one last blip of an apology out to the universe, delivered with Rancis's, Taffyta's, Callum's and Penny's names on it, he felt gravity kindly remind him of its intense power, and like a light, the clip his body took to the ground was final.
Wren urgently sat up with a huge, desperate gasp of gaping inhales and fervently peered about with terrified eyes. He grimaced a sharp cry outwards, looked up and before him and now was face to face with the incredibly tall, narrow tower he had just leaped from. Laid on the ground, alive and well, he peered up to the very top of said tower and now began to feel taunted. He heaved in shallow breaths, his eyes scanned the ground of the tower in the blurry haze of rain and fog, and with his findings, he could see his own father standing in the gape of a blackened doorway, facing into the building. Wren grit his teeth, shook his head and watched as Rancis reeled back and chucked a bottle of alcohol into the darkened building. Desperately trying to grapple with logic, Wren covered his face and hunched in on himself as suddenly the room, inside the bottom of the tower, erupted with a billowing cloud of flames. Said flames urgently licked at Wren's heels, an intense shockwave of destruction, and as he clumsily scoot back on the dirt and peered hard to the billowing mess of fire pouring out of the bottom of the tower, he could see his father standing, his back turned, hunched in on himself, just watching the destruction happen. It was in this switch did Wren now feel protective of this tower, a place he was certain he'd never been before. He heavily panted through the grit of his teeth as new sweat began to drip down his now-soot covered face and chest, he glowered down the back of his father's head and urgently got to a stand, so to very bravely approach.
"Dad," Wren hollered through the loud crackling destruction, the sudden thuds of falling wood and debris from inside the building. Rancis looked equally as haggard, Wren fully rounded Rancis's figure and grappled Rancis's upper arms. With a shake, Wren sharply held eyes with Rancis's deadened gaze, "Dad, what the hell are you doing!"
"It has to come down," Rancis's hoarse voice muttered, Wren shook his head and now weirdly felt even more protective of this strange structure he had never even dreamed of, let alone been to, in no timeline had he ever had any attachment to this building.
"No, i-it's... We can fix it!" Wren huffed shakily, disregarding Felix's game-day call, though Rancis caught on to it and very meanly gave Wren a deranged smirk.
"Even Felix has more power in that one, stupid little hammer than I will ever hope to have in my entire body," Rancis growled, and it was in this sharp instance did Wren flinch and fully understand that he wasn't talking to Rancis, his father wasn't in on this exterior swap with him and Gideon. It was here did Wren fully understand that he was having a conversation with himself, "What, somehow gain telekinesis powers just because you embraced the fact that you enjoy taking it up the ass?"
"Th-that's not," Wren staggered tearfully as he held his hands to Rancis's upper arms. Even though the words coming out of Rancis's mouth were Wren's own subconscious, the fact that all these hateful words were coming out of his own father's mouth was nearly too much to handle, "I-I didn't try to gain powers, dad, it just... Happened."
"So what, what do the REST of us do then!" Rancis hoarsely shouted, "Y'gunna leave the rest of us behind like you did, then? Your own little brother needed you..."
Wren huffed a faltered notion, staggered on his tears, felt his lip quiver and peered up into his father's eyes in unadulterated horror.
"And now, you have to live with yourself," Rancis hissed into Wren's face, "Y'don't get an out because you're too chicken... You don't get an out because you're too hung up on the fact that Callum can somehow be saved."
"H-He can," Wren crumpled, he meekly continued on through all of his tears, the blaze of the fire licked at his bare back, "Gideon's right, we can't give up..."
"You already did," Rancis growled, he glowered Wren down and pointed up, "The second your feet left that ledge."
"This isn't me giving up," Wren stabbed sharply, now feeling determination and protectiveness come back to him, "Wrecking shit down that doesn't serve you any longer isn't giving up..."
"You leapt-"
"I had a one-up! Okay?" Wren suddenly hollered into Rancis's face, both men sharply panted as they tightly hovered. Wren's deep, trembling voice stabbed onward, "I made a rock-bottom choice because I subconsciously felt safe to do so..."
"Then get back up there and repeat the cycle, y'little bitch," Rancis sharply hissed into Wren's face, and though Wren had to keep fervently reminding himself that this was not his actual father speaking, it still felt like daggers to his heart. Wren crumpled with tears as Rancis delivered the final blow, "That's all you know how to do."
Wren sharply squeezed Rancis's arms, and now with the added pressure that would surely break skin or tear muscle, Rancis's figure hissed away to nothing but smoke now lifting through Wren's fingertips like black snakes. Wren sealed his eyes shut in a loose flutter of reigning in power he was initially confused about, though as his coding began to urgently flood with a reign of what he was certain was Gideon's shared rainbow coding, inside their exterior swap, Wren felt every hit of tragedy, hardship, unfurl, every single cry Gideon had ushered out into the universe and felt it all be swiftly adopted into his coding. A death and rebirth, Wren twisted his back in a strict, rigid show of perfect form and, with as much grace and elegance afford to him, he clenched his fists and allowed Gideon's fresh wrecking abilities to surge every single last little blood vessel in his body. With such a hit of Gideon's unfathomable power, Wren ushered the universe about him one final battle cry, and with furious swings, strained tendons, bared teeth and hoarse, defeated cries into the blaze of fire, he successfully did everything he could to wreck the base of this seemingly-indestructible tower down to the ground.
Through the fire, the boards of wood that fell around him, Wren felt his coding quickly note that he had been encased in what seemed to be a protective dome of his own coded forcefield, though it had a rainbow sheen that swirled about it, the color of his and Throttle's lovely blood-orange coding swirling about in the intense amp of sudden emotion only brightened and intensified with the kiss of metallic, rainbow glints through the fire. He fluttered his eyes in the sealed hover he took to keep his eyes from rolling back, he continued to make solid work of destroying every last brick in this tower without tiring. Somehow, he felt as if he was tearing through a brick maze and the walls to destroy were never-ending, the rubble and full collapse of said high tower now came down on top of his protective bubble, and with said final collapse, Wren continued to step through it with his teary eyes sealed. With his coded protection making way for him, he continued to walk with his eyes shut, and with said progression, he finally scuffed his bare heels after a few moments of finding that he wasn't running into anything else to destroy, any singular spire of bricks the tower now clumsily had to offer, it was all decimated in his name. Wren heavily panted, sweat, tears, dirt and soot splayed his messy face, hair and bare chest, he kept his fists clenched and shook where he stood, though somehow, he felt his lung capacity broaden. Although he was certain that he wasn't brave enough to test said expansion to the fullest, he slowly began to feel a warm, brooding presence directly to his right, just on time.
"Deep breath," Gideon so tenderly cued, and with such a hit of sudden allowance, Wren stiffened his back and sucked in the hugest breath he had ever taken into his body, through his nose. Wren wildly fluttered his eyes, felt unending power course him, humility brought him closer to this delicious moment, and in relishing, Gideon scoffed a shaky chuckle and looked down to his bare feet as he tucked his thumbs into the gape of his sweat's pockets, "Y'feel it?"
"H-How the hell do you tame your own coding like this?" Wren whimpered in staggering, renewed, teary surprise as he kept his eyes shut, and though Gideon wanted to open his mouth and continue on with words of wisdom, he grinned in cheeky knowing and looked ahead to the fluffy, golden sunset clouds he had seen previously, now more clearly seen since the tower was gone and the storm was dissipating.
"That was all you, Wren," Gideon grumbled cutely, to which Wren popped his eyes open and firmly peered into Gideon's happily caught gaze. Wren shook his head, gestured to Gideon and looked perplexed, to which Gideon sucked in an equally as big breath, nodded and looked out before him, once more, "We may be in an exterior swap, but we both still have autonomy to our own coding. I can choose to simply be a vessel for imagination... You didn't use my wrecking abilities to bring down that tower."
Wren heavily panted through his nose and now looked to be having a full out-of-body experience. He glanced down to his trembling hands, turned around and took note of the whole mountain of wreckage he left behind and fervently peered into Gideon's eyes in full desperation.
"What are you saying?" Wren hissed shakily, Gideon tilted his head in a gesture to Wren's hands and gave him a cheeky little grin.
"Cue your coding," Gideon instructed lovingly, and upon Wren looking down at his hands in almost-apathetic disbelief, his bright, teary eyes widened in childlike wonder the second his beautiful, darkened orange coding swarmed his palms, all alive with that beautiful rainbow sheen he had immediately fallen in love with. Wren shot his teary though fresh eyes tight into Gideon's and huffed a faltering, stumbling notion of gasping shock. Gideon chuckled and looked down in an equal show of disbelief, "Ahh, the tower... I'm discovering a lot about myself, in these lucid trips, too..."
"What's happening? Th-this is my imagination? We're not in your lucid space?" Wren staggered nervously, to which Gideon shook his head and grinned.
"Nope," Gideon chirped with a shrug, Wren was thrilled that Gideon didn't seem concerned, "This was your tower moment. I was expecting to whisk you away and give you the life-saving talk of why you shouldn't want to end your life, but... Instead, you endured the worst thing your psyche could endure. The tower."
"The tower," Wren huffed nervously, both men looked back at the rubble with almost nostalgic yearning.
"It surely looks different for everyone, yours just so happened to legitimately be a tower. You took a good, long, hard look in the mirror and realized you were the villain in your own story," Gideon's deep voice wisely soothed over Wren's still trembling, fresh soul, "You had built this incredible stronghold filled with all sorts of different sets of beliefs... But, you looked yourself in the face and realized you had built it all in vain. You realized the tower wasn't serving you... It had to come down."
"I've been a horrible big brother," Wren whimpered as fresh tears spilled down his cheeks, and although Gideon felt the urge to scoop Wren into a hug and shush away his sorrows, both men stood tight in each other's gravity and understood this rapid-fire exchange of truths was the desperately needed.
"What else?" Gideon pawed tenderly.
"My dad's resentment towards mine and Throttle's upgrade made me avoid all those outings he and Callum would invite me to," Wren's exhausted, teary eyes nervously scanned Gideon's broad chest in the hit of dreaded realization coming to him, "Th-they surely thought I was just acting as if I was too good to hang out with them."
"Did they assume that or was that true for you?" Gideon volleyed, Wren squeezed his eyes shut.
"I wanted to spite them," Wren admitted sorrowfully, he hiccuped a cry and looked down to his hands, "I felt I had somehow hit jackpot... I had powers and stardom. I didn't have time for silly sword fighting lessons."
"Your father is on to something, Wren," Gideon hummed wisely, "I've been in a position where my powers were sucked from my body, and all I had to my name was my flesh and bone..."
Wren peered in hard terror into Gideon's darkened, hovering gaze, and with the very image of the potential of Gideon's evil glower, Wren sucked in a shaky breath through his nose and felt his blood run cold as Gideon slowly carried on.
"If you ever find yourself in a position where you're powerless..." Gideon narrowed his gaze and shook his head, "All of your father's sword and combat fighting would surely benefit you, now wouldn't it..."
Wren looked off and grimaced a teary, crumpling cry, knowing that Gideon was an eternally safe place for all of these huge emotions. Gideon bobbed a nod and allowed a small smile to sprawl his face as he looked down to his feet.
"Our powers make us happy, no?" Gideon pawed, Wren bobbed a nod and nervously began to scoot his eye contact back to Gideon's, though in the slow progression of still aimlessly scouring the broad of Gideon's thick clavicles, "This world and this life benefits from your misalignment with yourself... I learned this the hard way. Don't saddle your happiness onto any one particular thing, Wren. Don't give reasons to your happiness."
Wren nervously braved Gideon's powerful eye contact and softly panted through his nose as Gideon concluded his harrowing notions with a croak of grumbling, experienced understanding.
"Those reason can be taken from you," Gideon's deep voice ushered with succinct, precise caution.
Wren swallowed a trembling stagger of a swallow and was absolutely certain he couldn't comprehend just what Gideon or even Callum had been through, the torture both men had endured up until this point, he knew he'd be an absolute idiot not to fall into Gideon, in this raw moment.
"When the student is ready," Wren started, words he had no clue where he was grappling them from, words that fiercely resonated with his refreshed soul, he raised his eyebrows in a hit of shock and watched as Gideon did what he could to stifle the broaden of a relieved smile.
"The teacher will appear," Gideon finalized, he took in a steadying breath, tucked his thumbs deeper into his pockets, relaxed his shoulders and ushered a happy, chuckling conclusion into Wren's bubble, "You're ready."
"I'm ready," Wren sighed in agreeing with a nod.
"Wanna know how I know that?" Gideon wondered cutely, "I'm currently inside day-two of having this heightened stature, there's no way I'm in the headspace to be eagerly seeking out souls that want lessons in reaching inner peace and grappling at the light side of unfathomable power... But I'm quickly understanding that I do not have the ability to schlep away the idea of ushering good-natured beings to full, inner oneness. Even though I'm still grappling with this, myself, I can still hold your hand through this journey."
"As much as I want this, Gideon, I don't think obtaining rainbow coding is going to bring my family back together again," Wren lightly complained, "My dad already lowkey hates my guts for somehow gifting myself powers."
"Gamers can't just gift themselves powers, what you and I have done is entirely unheard of," Gideon looked off and shrugged, "There's no such thing as coincidences, and... Somehow, in the heat of the private moments we had with our swap mates, something in our coding allowed for the thinned veil. Some blip in the binary came a little loose, and... The deeper we dive into the emotion and meaning behind just how and why we were lead to those exact moments and time, the more we can understand just how the coded soul operates. We are more than just our electric coding."
Wren peered hard into Gideon's eyes and remained patiently silent as Gideon smoothly carried on with a sense of trepidation in his tone.
"Unfortunately, I cannot give you a fool-proof blueprint to rainbow coding, I cannot predict the future and your circumstances are entirely different from my own, but..." Gideon allowed his trepidation to fall away as he eyed Wren with a loving smile, "I can happily take you on, as my first pupil... I can happily shed light, I can happily help you dig your heels in and embrace the dark and scary demons that haunt your past, present and future. I can teach you how to unlock your coding to its fullest potential, like I've done for myself."
"Y-You're going to teach me?" Wren huffed, he tried not to get too excited, though Gideon blurt a cute laugh and looked down to his feet, once more.
"Wren, I couldn't think of a better first-student to take on... Callum's big brother," Gideon hummed in bittersweet, loving warmth, and it was in Gideon's hit of gentle words did Wren finally close the gap and eagerly slap Gideon into a huge hug about his middle. Gideon grunted a happy laugh and grappled his arms about Wren's shoulders. He sighed over the top of Wren's head and lulled his eyes closed in pleased relief, "That was some fucking fantastic wrecking, there, dude..."
"I was so angry," Wren choked a shaky laugh as both men squeezed inside of their huge hug and tenderly released one another.
"How do you feel?" Gideon wondered, Wren bobbed a nod and inhaled a huge breath.
"Awful, amazing..." Wren shook his head and shrugged in confusion, "Relieved, defeated, stupid, humbled..."
"Yeah, the second I realized I was along for the ride inside of your own tower moment, I was like ohh shit, this is gunna get wild," Gideon grimaced a small laugh and shook his head, "I'm glad I was here to help you... I'm glad I was here to witness all of this. I didn't know that I needed this for my own healing, as well."
"You did?" Wren pawed, Gideon sighed and looked up.
"Of course... It's made me realize that, the key to life isn't about becoming who you can be," Gideon peered into Wren's eyes with dignity, with humbled warmth, "It's about becoming who you are. Who you are isn't defined by your level up of coding, it isn't defined by what you do in your reality or the powers you may or may not have."
"... Tell it to my dad," Wren mumbled sadly, Gideon squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head.
"That's the beauty of leveling, that's the beauty of representing your own excellence... You won't have to tell your dad anything, your new plane of existence will speak volumes and it is only then that he will take a knee and listen," Gideon's lovely voice hummed, Wren fluttered his eyes and soaked in every blip of wisdom Gideon lovingly offered, their new teacher to student dynamic was something Wren was eager to don and adhere to, "You need to develop a deep trust in your own capabilities outside of your powers, in your value as a person. Boss energy requires inspired action. It requires that you don't place your value on your current situation."
"I-I... I don't say anything to my dad? Should I not even tell him about our interaction?" Wren worried, he unfurled his fingers and cued his incredible coding, both men were floored to find that said beautiful, metallic, rainbow sheen had not left Wren's person.
"No... It will make this situation worse," Gideon hummed, he looked off in contemplation and shrugged, "Uncle Rancis has his own demons to battle, he has his own mistakes to fess up to, and you need to keep your humility in check. Move in silence, Wren... Let your unending success be your noise."
Wren fell silent and peered hard into Gideon's lovely gaze, both men stood in the glint of setting sun as the fluffy, golden clouds now promised no more threats of storms to come. It was something Wren visibly sagged to.
"In this new chapter of our lives, living in paradise, roaming the internet, having everything life could ever hand us, on top of your unending fame," Gideon cautioned, said apprehensive tone firmly returned. Gideon peered hard into Wren's eyes and shook his head, "I was worried about you the most, and I'm glad my intuition here was spot on. I've been in your shoes, I've wanted it all to just end. I understand all of that... But I know, now, you can't revisit that feeling, can you."
"...No, I can't," Wren huffed in quiet, nervous bewilderment as he rested his hand to his chest, "H-how? It's haunted me since you and Callum left for Game Over."
"It's all grey matter, this topic isn't black and white, but it seems to me that you endured death in your own way," Gideon mused with a nod, "An old version of you died... You made room for your new self. I know you see that rainbow sheen inside of your coding."
"I-I do, what does that even mean?" Wren staggered, and though Gideon fluttered his eyes and could feel wholly in-tune with raw information being dolled his way, he knew that his signal wasn't totally perfect, he knew he didn't have every single last answer to all of life's questions, but even still, he allowed discernment and intuition to carry him.
"... I think this is proof that you are now taking a natural path to enlightened coding," Gideon wondered as he opened his own palms and cued his incredible rainbow coding, slithers of unending color snaked up the wavy circuitry in his hands and arms, "I took a sharp, dangerous detour and made it out alive, but... I think I'm here now to usher people into it. I want you to be cradled into greatness, not thrusted face first into a pit of fifty other gamers that want you dead."
"I mean, hey, you won," Wren chuckled, Gideon grinned and looked down as he finally allowed his tail to thump to the ground behind him.
"It came with a price, I'm nowhere near perfect, but..." Gideon looked off in cute contemplation and finally brought his smiling eyes back to Wren's dewy, excited, humbled gaze, "I'll help you get right with yourself... I promise, everything in your life will fall into place. Your relationship with your parents, as well as Callum, Penny and Lash..."
"I forgot they were still waiting for us," Wren worried, he suddenly showed a prickle of dread and stood tighter with himself, "Wh-what are they gunna think now that I have a rainbow sheen to my coding? I already was an anomaly for gaining powers by swapping with Throttle..."
"Y'wanna know who else is an anomaly?" Gideon muttered dryly, Wren sagged in the thwart as Gideon roused into chuckling, "You're in good company, my guy. Inside this lucid state, you're feeling heightened and excited, I know. It's okay to celebrate yourself, but you will fall back into humility. You won't feel the need to brag or announce or display yourself, like you have been."
"I've been a real dick, haven't I," Wren mumbled sadly, to which Gideon grinned and rolled his eyes.
"I haven't spent enough time with you to confirm or deny any of that, but if that's the conclusion you're coming to, on your own, after you've destroyed your own set of crumpling beliefs about yourself, then yeah, safe to say you're probably right," Gideon and Wren erupted into happy laughter. Gideon shrugged and pressed on through the bass of their warm chuckling, "Again! You're in great company. Even now, I'm not above being an ass on occasion. This journey is about observing yourself, bringing awareness to your actions and words. You have a lot of work ahead of you, but... I'm willing to come alongside you and usher you to where you're destined to be."
Wren gazed hard into Gideon's eyes and felt as if this was too good to be true. He dart his teary eyes between Gideon's and didn't dare waver from Gideon's wise stare.
"In this whole day, I've gotten the vibe that all anyone wants me to do is explain just how the hell I did this so that they, themselves, can have this world-altering coding," Gideon mumbled, "I very quickly promised myself that I would only extend a hand to those who don't show greed. To those that prove that they're ready to dig in and do the dirty work of humbling yourself and taking responsibility for your actions."
Gideon swung his gaze tight into Wren's, once more, and narrowed his sweet gaze for loving emphasis.
"I wasn't expecting to come out of this innocent little one-on-one with a pupil," Gideon's definitive conclusions poured over Wren like the coolest water in the hottest sunshine.
"I'm honored," Wren huffed humbly, he looked down and shook his head, "Undeserving..."
"You are deserving," Gideon corrected, "Everyone is deserving. All it takes is a shift in perspective, a shift into humility. You had the strength to realize you were the reason your life was becoming increasingly difficult. When you become someone who you're not supposed to be, life will fight against you. I became a Game Over winner and it nearly ruined me, ruined everyone. I became someone I shouldn't have been, but... It took rock bottom to open my eyes and understand that I had wrongs to right."
"It wasn't all your fault," Wren mumbled sorrowfully, Gideon shrugged and nodded.
"Sure, the people in my life played a part, and they will have to answer to it by taking that dreaded look in the mirror," Gideon hummed, "If I have to be that big, dreaded mirror with legs, if I have to trigger everyone to this point of collapse and rebuild, well then... So be it."
"One Fluggerbutter down," Wren stated cheekily, and even though Fluggerbutter wasn't his last name anymore, he still donned it due to his familial ties in this moment.
"I'm actually glad you're up first," Gideon sighed happily, "You can easily see disfunction and have fought against it, don't think I haven't noticed. I see how you go back and forth with Penny and your dad, they hate that shit."
"They're like brick walls! Nothing gets through to them," Wren urgently complained, to which Gideon rested his hand to Wren's broad shoulder with a happy laugh.
"It's okay... It's normal to feel that way, you're not going to feel the need to talk AT them, like that, any longer," Gideon mused lovingly, Wren peered up into Gideon's eyes in a show of gentle fear.
"I-I don't want to fight with Penny and Lash, what am I to expect of this conversation?" Wren worried, Gideon lulled his eyes closed and pondered Wren's words for a moment.
"You're to expect applying everything you've learned, just now," Gideon skillfully cued, "You're going to collect yourself and present them with these new, hard facts you've grappled onto. You're going to begin the healing process with your sister... But there has to be ownership, Wren. No one, in this entire mess, is innocent. Own your shit... Seek humility."
"What if I get angry?" Wren continued to show signs of wanting to panic under this new state of being.
"That's a valid emotion, feel it," Gideon shrugged, "Allow everything... But you have to keep ownership and humility at the forefront."
"Y-You're going to stay, right?" Wren huffed, Gideon gripped Wren's shoulder and chuckled.
"Yes... I'll be mediating. These hard talks are necessary," Gideon reminded, a notion he was ushering Wren what felt like ten hours ago, though was simply inside of this same conversation, "But now, you have all the tools to get through it gracefully. You're learning, and I'm here to spot you. I'm in your corner."
"Thank you," Wren's deep voice trembled, Gideon smiled and bobbed him a definitive nod.
"Y'ready?" Gideon cued lovingly, he prepared to bring him and Wren out of Wren's shared lucid space, and with Wren's huge deep breath, he finally nodded and sagged his shoulders.
"Ready."
