Chapter Three

"Phoebe…" Paige greeted when she entered Phoebe's office.

Phoebe looked up in surprise, "Paige? What're you doing here? What's wrong?"

Touched that her sister's first instincts were of concern for her, Paige smiled sadly and replied, "Us…I miss my big sister."

"I miss my little sister," Phoebe admitted as she stood and walked around her desk to face Paige. She stared at her sister for a moment before she held out her arms to Paige. After Paige stepped into her embrace, Phoebe sighed in relief and stroked her sister's back. "I'm glad he makes you happy, sweetie."

"I know you're not jealous," Paige whispered before pulling away with a sniffle. "But it hurts that you don't trust him."

"And it hurts that you don't trust me," Phoebe gently countered.

"It's not that I don--"

"I don't want to see you make the same mistake I did," Phoebe interrupted.

"So you finally admit Cole was a mistake?"

"Loving Cole wasn't a mistake," Phoebe emphatically told her sister. "Don't think for one minute that I even remotely believe that."

"So, what then?"

"My mistake, one of my mistakes," she quickly corrected herself, "was that I didn't trust my sisters enough to consider their warnings. If I'd've listened earlier, I might've saved us all a lot of pain and grief and my life, our lives, might've been completely different now."

"You loved him," Paige shrugged.

"Now say it like you mean it." But Paige didn't respond so Phoebe sighed and said, "You wanna know something ironic? For all your sniping about my wild sex life with fears of commitment, the only man I ever completely committed myself to and waited before jumping into bed with him was Cole."

"Please…"

Stung by Paige's sarcastic tone and rolls of the eyes, Phoebe declared, "I didn't sleep with Cole until I knew that what we felt for each other was love. It's not that I didn't want to, I mean you do remember what he looked like…" She shook her head in annoyance that her heart would still skip a beat when she thought of him that way. The chemistryhad beenthere from that very first moment but, for some reason, she'd refused to give into her impulsive nature. Even from the start, she'd been careful with Cole taking it slow. He'd been different from any man she'd ever met and she'd wanted things to work out with him. So, instead of a series of meaningless quickies, she'd dated him, gotten to know him. And wanted him all the more.

"Earth to Pheebs…"

Phoebe blinked and realized she'd lost her train of thought. "Sorry, guess he's been on my mind a lot since last night."

"Because you learned he was an Avatar," Paige surmised. "Piper told me what you said before you ran out and that Leo figured it out. Isn't that enough to prove the Avatars are dangerous? Cole was insane and invincible and they wanted him on their side."

"Did Piper also tell you that they said Cole only agreed because of love?" Phoebe countered. "Just like Leo. Didn't you tell me that Cole seemed bothered by the altered world? That it wasn't what he'd expected?"

"Yeah," Paige warily replied. "But if you also remember I told you he was out to kill us. Again."

"Still," Phoebe sighed, "he created that world because he loved me. No matter how misguided his actions, it's the one thing that never wavered, Paige. Never. Our love was real. It took time to develop but it was real. So if you tell me that, after only a few weeks of knowing him, you're already that in love with Kyle, I'll be the first to congratulate you both and step aside."

Paige remained silent, unable to meet her sister's gaze. She was attracted to Kyle and enjoyed spending time with him and the fact that he knew her secret made it that much easier and she certainly wanted to see where the relationship could go but she'd be lying if she said she was madly in love with him. And Phoebe knew it. And she knew that Phoebe knew she knew it.

Relieved her instincts had been right and that her sister hadn't yet reached that plateau, Phoebe still let her sister stare at the floor while she continued to press on in order for Paige to truly understand why she's been so worried about Agent Brody. "When things ended with Cole the way they did, I thought I'd fall into a deep pit and never see light again. But with you and Piper I found my way back. And I love you both for it and I've tried to make you both proud by moving on with my life. But there are times when I still get scared dealing with issues of love and trust and it hurts when I look to you for encouragement and you're not there. I mean, does it depend on who's hurt me or was it payback for me somehow not being supportive to you?"

Paige stared at her sister in surprise. She'd never realized how badly Phoebe was still affected by what Cole had done to her. Why hadn't she let on? "Maybe we were caught up in our own problems and didn't realize you were hurting too," Paige uttered. "I guess it's sometimes been so frustrating watching you ac--"

"Act like an immature teenager?" Phoebe patted her sister's hand, "I get why you think that. I do. But did you ever really put yourselves in my shoes standing at the edge of the abyss being told to jump because it's okay but knowing, deep down, something was missing? Did you ever realize that even though you supported me and encouraged me while I fell in love with Jason, not once did either of you suggest that I tell him the truth? Not until right before the end, after more than a year, did we even talk about the idea of letting him in on our secret. And then, when he did find out…"

"He left you," Paige nodded sympathetically. "But you got past it."

"Um, you do remember my speed-dating frenzy, right?" Phoebe encouraged her sister to sit while she returned to her chair behind the desk. "I was blinded by a vision of the future I wanted so desperately that I needed the shock of losing my powers to finally remind me of who I am and what I want out of life. And I've had to learn all over again about letting someone into my heart. I didn't even like Leslie at first but I couldn't deny the connection. The first one since Jason and it scared me because I wasn't ready to go through another painful breakup which I knew was inevitable."

"You didn't give him a chance," Paige accused. "You were in such denial about wanting him that you never gave him the chance to know you."

"Number one, I wasn't in denial because, believe it or not, I was actually enjoying my independence and I wasn't looking to start a new relationship, and, number two," she added, "once I got to know him a little better, I did want to let him in. And maybe if he'd've stayed in the city I'd've had the chance. The point is, Paige, both were attractive, good, caring, creative, generous mortal men who wanted to be with me but I held back. I couldn't share with them a part of myself that I wasn't sure they'd understand. A part of myself that had been so easy to reveal to Cole."

"Because he'd researched you," Paige glared, "in order to kill you."

Phoebe exhaled in relief and leaned back in her chair. Paige finally gave her the opening she'd waited for and she smiled bitterly, "And how do you know Kyle didn't research you in order to kill you?"

Paige opened her mouth to argue but suddenly closed it when she realized Phoebe had steered the entire conversation in order to ask that one question. She'd fallen into the trap hook, line, and sinker and she folded her arms across her chest. "Not fair."

Phoebe tried not to sound smug when she asked, "But you can't answer me, can you? You may have even asked yourself the same question but convinced yourself it couldn't be true. Kyle couldn't be a demon trying to set you up by undermining your relationship with your sisters. That's something Cole would do, not Kyle. How close am I?"

"Warm," Paige reluctantly admitted.

"His story, and the way he came into our lives," Phoebe quietly said, "can seem just as convenient as the Avatars manipulating us into protecting the Seer. So, knowing that Kyle can have a dark side with his need for revenge and knowing what I went through with Cole, is it still so easy for you to believe Kyle and ignore my warnings to be careful?"

"Kyle's mortal just like Jason and Leslie," Paige insisted before adding, in Phoebe's own words, "He's attractive, good and caring and, in his own way, rather creative. And I don't have to hide anything from him because he understands me."

"Maybe he does," Phoebe conceded with a sigh. "Maybe Kyle's the guy who'll give you a happily ever after…" She slumped in her chair, emotionally drained from reliving her love life, knowing Paige was still clinging to the hope that Kyle was good. "God, it scares me the way you let him into our home, our secrets, when you barely knew him." She leaned forward again, resting her elbows on the desk, "Paige, this isn't like when you confessed all to Glenn. Agent Brody wasn't someone you'd trusted all your life that Piper and I could accept without question. He was someone who'd secretly had us under surveillance and practically blackmailed usinto helping him with some favor to be named at a future date. All we know about him is what he told you and, powers or not, I know there's more to him than meets the eye. And I wish you'd be more careful around him, certainly about spilling any more family secrets that could hur--"

"I didn't tell him about Leo," Paige quickly said before she frowned, "no matter how angry I am with Leo, I'd never reveal something like that unless Leo said it was okay."

"Good," Phoebe nodded, "because I'd hate to see Kyle do anything stupid like try to vanquish Leo."

"He wouldn't do that!" Paige exclaimed.

"Wouldn't he? From everything you've told us and everything we've seen, Kyle's been waiting his whole adult life for revenge against the Avatars. All of them. You think he'll let Leo go because we ask him to?"

"He wouldn't do that," Paige repeated.

"Honey, I want to believe that," Phoebe honestly said, "because I've seen how you've been glowing ever since you met him. I know you've been happy. You deserve happiness and I hope to God that Kyle's exactly what he says he is and that he can give it to you. But I don't think we can take that chance right now. There's a new Source in town, or will be soon, and we've got two babies in the family now. The three of us have to sit down and make some decisions about the Source and about the Avatars and what they're offering."

"I say they're evil and need to be vanquished," Paige contended.

"And I say you've only heard Kyle's side," Phoebe countered. "You didn't see the vision and you haven't heard the Avatars and you certainly haven't considered Leo." When Paige frowned, Phoebe added, "You owe it to him to hear his side and why he chose to become an Avatar."

"Fine," Paige grumbled before looking at her watch, "but right now I'd better get back to school."

As Paige stood and turned to go, the phone rang and Phoebe called out to her, "Are we okay?"

Paige hesitated before answering, "We're getting there."

Phoebe held up a finger, indicating for Paige to wait, and answered the phone, "Phoebe Halliwell." She frowned, barely able to understand Piper. "I can't under--"

"Chris…" Piper sobbed.

"What about Chris?" Phoebe stood, steeling herself for Piper's reply.

"He's gone…blood…my baby's gone…"

"We're on the way," Phoebe gasped as she rushed towards Paige and ordered, "Home now!"

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