Chapter Twenty-One

In a rush to get back to school, Paige flung open the front door with annoyance and was completely taken aback by Cole standing before her. "Cole…"

"Paige," he greeted with a quirky smile, "long time no see."

"Nine days, eight nights, but who's counting?" she shrugged. "Look I'm not trying to be rude but --"

"Oh never that," Cole rolled his eyes.

She let it go, "Look, I've really gotta get back to the school. Besides, Phoebe's not here. She does work, y'know."

He shook his head, "I'm not here for Phoebe. I'm here for you." He smiled from her stunned reaction and assured her, "Nothing sinister. Honest. Drake's kept me informed about his progress but I wanted to hear from you how you thought it was going with Kyle."

"Okay…I guess," she waved him inside but stayed in the foyer. "I don't know, it's hard to tell. Sometimes I think he's back to his old self but other times…Other times I see the demon he's become and I wonder if Kyle's really gone after all." She paused a moment and added, "I don't know how you and Drake came up with that deep undercover cover for him or how you convinced his supervisors but you bought us a couple of weeks where his job's concerned. I don't think he's quite ready yet to face the regular world again."

"His whole world's been turned inside-out, Paige. It'll take time," Cole empathized. "Kyle's learning about a powerful part of himself that he never knew existed. It's a lot to take in." She silently nodded and he said, "But you caught him early enough after his transformation. With enough good influence surrounding him, monitoring him, I think the odds of saving him fall more in his favor each day."

Suddenly Paige felt awkward, "Y'know, it was really…good what you did for him. I mean you could've burnt him to a crisp or snapped him in two but you didn't. You went against your instincts and gave him a chance. And then you found Drake who, well, he's character all right, but he's…I…I like him. We all do. He's funny and charming and can be a complete goofball at times making him fit right in and…and he's not just helping Kyle…When he's hanging around, he reminds us of, of…well, of lessons we seem to have forgotten and…and we're learning…"

Both satisfied and relieved she'd unknowingly confirmed Drake's reports, Cole nodded, "Thanks for giving Drake that teaching position."

"Against my better judgment," she complained, "but he's definitely got a way with those kids."

"Yeah, well, thanks anyway," he turned to the door.

"Any other demons who want to be good or human that we should know about?" she called out. "I mean, first there's you, then this other Seer, now Drake?"

He faced her again and nearly smiled, "In the Underworld, who knows…I'll do my best to warn you first."

"You really are different," she commented, "changed, I mean. You seem more, I don't know, at ease, confident."

"I've been to hell and back," he explained, "and have been given more second chances than I deserved. And I won't take it for granted or blow it this time."

"Phoebe wouldn't agree," Paige said. "She believed you deserved those chances."

"I wasn't prepared," he argued. "Phoebe exposed my soul to me and I wasn't prepared for the onslaught of conflicting emotions. And everything happened so fast that I only had time to react, never to absorb and adjust. I don't know, maybe Phoebe and I were only meant to meet so she could free my soul. Maybe we're not destined to be together."

"Or maybe you are. Look, Cole, I don't have any answers," she sighed. "And I can't predict the future. Maybe you and Phoebe will get married and have ten kids or maybe I'll vanquish you next week. Just do your best, that's all we can ask."

Speechless by her change in attitude, he turned back to open the door. "Okay then, see you around."

But Paige darted forward and grabbed his arm, "What I mean is, thank you." She felt him stiffen before he faced her and she tried to lighten the moment, "Yeah, it sounds unbelievable to me too." He snorted lightly and she returned a shy smile, "I'm serious, though. Thank you for what you did, not just for Kyle but for us too."

"Phoebe already thanked me when I found Drake," he informed her with a shrug.

"But I needed to say it too," she said. And, somehow, doing so lifted a weight off her shoulders.

"It still doesn't make up for the past though, does it, Paige?" he asked. "I never wanted to hurt any of you. I --"

"I know," she interrupted. "I know you're sorry for what you did and I know you didn't always have a choice. This whole mess with Kyle's forced me to look back on the past with a different eye now."

"But you can't forgive me, can you?" he realized.

"I'm sorry," she apologized with a shake of her head, "but you hurt me, Cole. You targeted me and hurt me real bad. I still…I never told her because I don't want her to feel more guilty than she still does but I…I still have nightmares. I still relieve some of those moments and…" He was about to interrupt but she cut him off with another shake of her head, "But I think I'm ready to leave it in the past, to take a leap of faith, and move forward. Maybe it's time we all did."

"Maybe you should talk to her."

"Maybe I did," she grinned slyly. But the grin faded quickly, "It's different for Phoebe. She's not just terrified of trusting you again, she's terrified of trusting herself again."

"I know, Paige," he sighed, "but neither one of us can change what happened and, no matter what we each say, we can't seem to move past it. She's too afraid of me turning evil, of herself giving into the evil."

Paige shook her head, "She's more terrified of something else." She waited for him to look directly at her, "She's afraid of losing you, Cole. She put her whole being into loving you, into your future, your family, and when it was torn from her, she nearly lost herself in the process. She went from one extreme to another, one obsession to another, until she finally settled into something of a comfortable life. And I don't think she can handle that happening again."

"And now that I'm back, I'm ruining it all for her," he commented with disgust at having hurt her again.

But Paige disagreed, "Now you're back to save her. Yeah," she chuckled, "I told you it's unbelievable to hear."

But he doubted her statement, "Does she even want to be saved? By me?"

"C'mon, Cole, you know her," she countered. "Phoebe wants you back because she's never stopped loving you."

"So, I repeat," he sighed with exasperation, "what now? How does she, do we, move on?"

"You take it slow," she instructed. "Start simple with no pressure, no expectations. Take her to dinner. Take in a movie. The important thing is to just get to know one another again."

Cole stared at her a moment and forced himself to realize that she was entirely serious. Not only was she giving her permission to try again with Phoebe but she was giving him pointers. But he didn't want to push his luck and decided to go, "Thanks, Paige." And as he shimmered away he could hear her faint, "You're welcome."

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"All right, Halliwell, what the hell is this?" Elise questioned as she angrily burst into Phoebe's office.

Phoebe glanced up at her boss with disappointment. She'd worked hard on that column. "You didn't like it?"

"Look, Phoebe, no games, the clock's ticking," Elise told her. "And I need your column in my hands this minute."

"Aren't you holding it in your hands?"

"What I am holding is your list of things to do this week," Elise glared, "and your shopping list."

"Oh my God," Phoebe groaned as she dropped her head into her hands on the desk. "I must've attached the wrong file," she mumbled. She picked her head up again and apologized before turning back to her computer, "I'm printing you a copy right now and e-mailing it."

"It's him, isn't it?" Elise accused.

"Him, who?"

Elise eyed her, "You're not still sick are you?"

"No, I told you, I'm fine now," Phoebe replied as a light bulb went off in her head, "oh, him. I haven't seen Cole in a week."

"That doesn't mean he's still not messing with your head," Elise maintained. "This isn't the best time for you to lose focus. I need you to be honest with me. Do you need a leave of absence?"

"Of course not, no," Phoebe quickly exclaimed. "I just attached the wrong document, Elise. It's nothing, I swear."

Elise stepped inside the office and closed the door behind her. "Phoebe, you know I like you, I care about you."

"And I appreciate that, Elise," Phoebe assured her. "You opened the door for me to express myself in a way I never imagined I could and you've given me so many chances to prove myself. And somewhere along the way I discovered you weren't the dragon lady I thought you were."

"Hmmph…" Elise sniffed before teasing, "And I discovered you're not the flake I thought you were."

"I'm just a little confused about Cole being back," Phoebe admitted, "but I promise not to let it affect my work."

"Is he back?"

Knowing what Elise meant, Phoebe shrugged, "I guess so…that's the problem, I give all this advice to strangers and don't have a clue what to do for myself."

"Do you want him back?" Elise watched Phoebe struggle to answer and ordered, "No. Don't think about it. Give me your gut reaction. Do you want him back?"

"Yes," Phoebe whispered.

"Then go for it," Elise declared. "Forget what everyone else thinks, all that matters is what you think."

Phoebe avoided her gaze by retrieving the copy of her column from the printer. "It's complicated," she finally said.

"And that surprises you? Life is complicated, Phoebe," Elise stated. "I know this guy hurt you and I know you're afraid to trust him again but you have to move on with your life."

"I can't go through it again," Phoebe nearly cried. "It almost killed me the last time when it fell apart."

Elise sympathized, recalling Phoebe's state of being at that time, but said, "Then you have to decide which pain would be worse, the pain of it all going wrong by taking a chance or the pain of letting it all slip away by not taking a chance."

"I'm not sure I know how to make it happen and I don't know that we should even try." Phoebe shook her head, "I just don't know how to make it work this time."

Elise took the page from Phoebe's hands, "You take is slow, one day at a time. Learn about each other again. Start simple, go to dinner or a movie."

A knock on the door spared Phoebe from commenting and elicited a shout from Elise, "What!"

Phoebe's assistant poked her head in and apologized for the interruption, "But there's some guy here for you, Phoebe."

"Not a good time," Elise warned.

"He's got flowers," the young woman revealed with a smile. And, in a voice barely above a whisper in case he was listening, she added, "He's really hot, too."

Elise rolled her eyes but nodded to Phoebe, "I told you, start simple. Now take a deep breath before you hyperventilate on me." To the assistant, she ordered, "Send him in."

Carrying a bouquet of wildflowers, Cole cautiously entered . "Bad time?"

"No," Elise answered, "Phoebe's about due for a break. But she's in the middle of an important project so I don't want you taking up too much of her time." When he nodded, she poked him in the chest with the paper that was getting crinkled and threatened, "You want to live to see next week, you remember what I said about messing with her. You don't want to have to answer to me."

"I'm sure I don't," he replied, catering to her mood. He glanced at Phoebe and wasn't sure what to think from her nervous and anxious expression.

"Keep it simple and in public," Elise continued to instruct him. "Don't bring it here. Remember there are always two sides. And give her space when she asks for it."

Now he grinned in amusement, "Anything else?"

"I expect a front row seat at the wedding and a bottle of the best bubbly money can buy for doing her job and giving smart sound advice," she smirked before turning around to Phoebe. "Remember, one day at a time."

Phoebe nodded and watched Elise leave the office. But she couldn't speak yet and ended up gazing at Cole.

Cole finally broke the silence by shoving the flowers at Phoebe. "You used to like these."

She snapped free from her thoughts and admired the bouquet, "I still do…thanks."

"Phoebe, I think we need --"

"Cole, we need to --"

Speaking simultaneously broke the tension and both laughed for a moment before Cole asked, "So would dinner be okay?"

"I'm working late," she replied. But, lest he think she was putting him off, she quickly suggested, "Can you come by here around seven?"

"I'll be back," he agreed with a relieved smile.

"I'll be here," she assured him with a grateful smile.

An hour after Cole left Phoebe's office, both were still smiling.

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