Chapter 2 – Golden Retriever Bonding


-:-:-


"I made a… connection," Harry settled on when he and Evie regrouped in their dorm room that evening.

Immediately the princess perked up, watching his face with a look of open interest. "You networked? Go on."

"Accidentally," Harry muttered, hunching his shoulders when he turned his interest back to his homework. "Caught some assholes bothering some blond guy." He cleared his throat, shifting uneasily. "He's gonna sit with us at lunch tomorrow."

"What's his name?" Evie asked, cutting straight to business, the same as she always did.

"Chad," Harry replied. "The assholes called him 'charming', though, like some kind of nickname."

Evie clicked her fingers, her expression lighting up with satisfaction. "That, my dear, would be Chad Charming, Cinderella's son."

"Cinderella?" Harry echoed. "Isn't that the princess who died?"

"Yeah, it was awful," Evie said. "Even the Tremaines were broken up over it."

Harry wondered if Chad's lack of mother had contributed to him being a target to the other students of the school, if that had been the fire that led to him molding the shield of an 'obnoxious shit', but Harry wouldn't know until he actually talked to the guy for more than ten minutes.

"This could be good for us," Evie continued, her brows furrowed in thought. "Chad's a prince. Gaining his friendship could be useful, we just have to make sure that's all it is. We don't want people to think we're gold diggers."

Harry made a face. "I doubt they'd be open to polyamory anyway."

"Still," Evie hummed, tapping her chin thoughtfully. "Better to be safe than sorry."

-:-:-

"Hi!" Chad offered brightly when he saw them the next day, the blond hovering tentatively on the outskirts of their secluded garden hideaway before he managed the courage to push in. "Um, hello. It's me, Chad, from yesterday."

"Hey, Chad," Evie greeted, her smile kind when she motioned Chad to take a seat across from them. "How are you?"

"I'm good!" Chad chirped, rushing to sit down with a relieved grin. "I have that sweater you loaned me. I washed it and everything. Just in case, you know. Didn't want to leave behind any um- princely germs."

"Thank you," Evie said, the height of soothing and diplomatic. "That's very kind of you."

The comment – the small, nothing that it was, made Chad light up like a damn bonfire. "I um- yeah, that was- that was what my mom wanted. Courage and kindness, I mean. I don't- I don't know for sure, of course, because she- but Captain Anozie said…" he trailed off somewhat pathetically. "Sorry."

"You don't have to apologize," Evie replied, and this was- it was unquestionably sad, and how an Auradon kid managed to get to such a scattered state was something Harry couldn't help but be confused by, but Evie was grace under pressure and seemed to understand what Chad needed. "We haven't properly met yet. I'm Evie."

She held out her hand, and after a moment where Chad watched to see if she'd- what, pull back? Well, after that he leaned in, shaking her hand gently and pressing a kiss against her knuckles. He seemed relieved when it was over, or more likely, seemed relieved that he'd managed to execute as much without making a mistake, and turned to Harry after a moment's hesitation.

Evie didn't even have to elbow the pirate for him to get with the picture. He offered his gloved hand and Chad took it willingly, pressing a kiss to his damn knuckles as well.

This guy.

He'd be dead on the Isle in five minutes. Harry found himself remarkably protective of him despite this, probably because the blond reminded him of Gil.

"So Chad," Evie said, deftly picking up the conversation. "Tell us about yourself."

It seemed to be a statement no one had ever made towards Chad, and as such he lost a second being bamboozled by such a concept before he eagerly launched into things, his eyes lit with a happiness of the truly neglected.

And that was how Evie met Chad.

-:-:-

They got a rundown of the basics. Chad was the prince of Sardinia, he played Tourney and Swords and Shields. He didn't perform well scholastically and seemed to have a grand total of zero familial support.

"My dad's just busy," he rushed to explain. "After my mom died, just- he has a lot to do, and that's okay. I mean, that's what being king's about, you know. You have to make sacrifices." He started twisting his hands together, one of his many nervous tells. "My grandpa says he doesn't have time for my whining, which is definitely true. I try not to do that, though, I know it's unbecoming."

Harry had a feeling that Chad's 'whining' was really just trying to initiate any kind of conversation with people, because he didn't seem particularly well-versed at that, which made Harry think that maybe it didn't happen all that often without Chad being steamrolled.

"I have a lot of friends," Chad lied. "Though um- they're usually busy and stuff because we're all royalty. That wasn't a brag," he rushed to say to Evie. "Sorry, I um- I didn't mean-"

"It's okay," Evie soothed just like she did every other time he tried to apologize. "You were just stating a fact, you don't have to apologize for that."

"Cool," Chad said, ducking his head with a flush.

He asked about both of them too, seeming determined to prove that he wasn't self-obsessed or something, and actually seemed genuinely invested in every answer they gave.

"You made that?" Chad gushed when Evie explained her penchant for sewing. "Both of your outfits? Wow, Evie, that's amazing."

"Thank you," Evie said, a pleased flush dusting her cheeks.

"You're both very pretty," Chad continued. "Not that- I know that's not the most important thing in the world, obviously, just- you're very stylish, is all."

"Thank ye, blondie," Harry said, because Evie couldn't pull all the load.

Chad turned to face Harry. "And um- you just- you knew how you wanted to dress?" he asked. "I don't really- I mean, I just wear whatever my grandpa's assistant sends me. He says he doesn't trust me to have respectable taste, whatever that means." Chad made a face. "I think that it's cool that you get to wear like, pink and eyeshadow and nail polish and stuff."

"Would you like to?" Evie asked, making Chad's gaze go wide. "Try any of that, I mean?"

Chad's flush darkened until he looked like something akin to a tomato. "Do you think I could pull it off?"

"Definitely," Evie said, grinning wide. "Why don't you stop by our dorm room after school? Maybe some of Sonny's stuff would fit you."

"Oh," Chad said. "I'd um- I'd really like that, Miss Evie."

"It's just Evie, Chad," Harry reminded him. "Evie and Sonny."

"Oh," Chad repeated, like they'd given him the damn world.

-:-:-

And that was how Harry came to lose some of his more boyish clothes, but when he looked at Chad wearing the pink oversized cardigan, sporting a brown smokey eye while Evie painted his nails light blue, it was hard to be mad.

"Do you wanna try lip gloss?" Evie asked Chad when he grinned at his reflection, seeming endlessly pleased with his transformation.

"Could I?" Chad asked, tone rife with hope, and that was how the three of them tried on different shades until they found the one that best suited Chad.

"My sister sent us some money so we could shop for any extra things we needed," Evie explained. "Maybe we can go and pick out some stuff you actually want to wear."

"Like shiny shoes?" Chad asked. "Or floral stuff? I like flowers, but my grandpa's assistant ignores me any time I ask for them."

"Yes," Evie said, getting a set in her brow that indicated there was an injustice she was definitely going to battle. "Like that."

-:-:-

Chad dropped by their room the next morning so Evie could redo his makeup, the princess promising to procure Chad his own pallet and practice with him until he could do it on his own, and then they were off, Chad walking with a distinct bounce in his step as he wore Harry's dumb cardigan like it was a three-piece suit.

Harry rode the high of that dumb optimism until lunch time, when a slushie-spattered Chad hovered on the edge of their nook, looking entirely dejected.

"I want names, Chad," Evie said while Harry let the blond sit beside him, wrapping an arm around the blond's shoulders because fucking what the fuck was wrong with these dipshit Auradon people?

"I mean, I probably deserved it," Chad sniffed, rubbing at his eyes. "This is why I shouldn't pick out my own stuff."

"They tried this shit two days ago when ye were wearing yer grandpa's shit," Harry reminded him. "They're not attacking ye because of your clothes, they're attacking ye because they're assholes."

"No, they're not um- that," Chad gushed. "They just- that's a friend thing."

"Chad," Evie cut in, her tone firm. "No it's not, and we're not going to let it happen anymore."

Chad looked at her, gaze mixed with hope and a sort of wary reserve that indicated he thought it couldn't be done. It was a look that Harry saw on orphans from the Isle, and a prince from Auradon sure as shit shouldn't be wearing it.

"What's your schedule?" Evie moved on, ever the practical human.

The next day Chad left their room in an oversized lilac sweater and clip-on earrings, and Harry and Evie traded off from walking him to his classes during the trouble periods where his bullies would show up. One look at Harry scowl or Evie's fluttery fingers usually sent them packing.

"Oh wow, oh wow," Chad said when the three of them headed out to lunch. "I didn't get tripped once today. That usually happens all the time."

Harry filed that away as shit that was unacceptable. "What else did they do to ye?"

"I mean." Chad flushed. "You know, the usual stuff. Knocked my books out of my hand or slushied me or stole my shoes."

Fucking Auradon.

"Never again," Evie pledged, reaching over to squeeze his shoulder before they retreated to their usual lunch table.

Harry would think it strange, adding this weird Auradon kid to their group dynamic, but Chad was so bizarrely happy and enthusiastic once he managed his way out of his reserved shell that it was all but impossible for Harry and Evie not to like him.

"Look!" Chad would chirp, showing them a picture of a flower he'd taken between classes. "I found it by the auditorium, isn't it pretty?"

"That cloud looks like a dolphin!" he would cheer, pointing up above them with a brilliant smile. "Or maybe a whale? I'm not good with animals."

"You're going to be the best fashion designer in all of Auradon, Evie," he would say with complete and utter sincerity. "I can feel it in my bones. Feel it."

He would visit them after school and work on homework with Harry while Evie sewed away on her machine, and on one notable occasion he joined their group call with Queen Snow because he happened to be hanging around when she called them.

"This is Chad," Evie explained, who waved his fingers in an excited flutter. "He's our first Auradon friend."

"The first of many," Chad pledged. "Thank you for getting Evie and Sonny off the Isle, Queen Snow, they're the best people ever, and I'm really glad they're my friends."

So fucking sappy.

"It was my absolute pleasure, Chad," Queen Snow said, seeming familiar with Chad's flavor of… Chadness. "Why don't you tell me what the three of you have been getting up to?"

"Evie's teaching me how to do makeup!" Chad chirped. "And Sonny's teaching me disengagement tactics so I can run away from my bullies!"

"You have bullies?" Queen Snow asked, and Harry and Evie didn't know it yet, but apparently that was a thing you actually told other people about in Auradon.

That was what led to the parent-teacher conference that had Queen Snow standing in as Chad's guardian and what led to the four assholes who regularly harassed Chad in camera-laden hallways to get suspended for two weeks.

"Wow," Chad said when they walked out of that meeting, seeming somewhat dazed. "I thought only babies tattled to the principal."

"They did something wrong," Queen Snow explained patiently. "They deserve to face the consequences of their actions." She turned to Evie and Harry. "I'm sure you two didn't think to report this because you're not used to the chain of authority, but out here there are laws to protect your basic rights, and Auradon Prep, as well as the guardsmen, will work to uphold them, but they can't do that if they don't know a crime was committed."

"Um." Harry and Evie shared a look. "Sorry," he offered. "We're still getting used to that."

The queen sighed, a weary thing, though she didn't seem upset with them. "Why don't we go out for dinner tonight? What's a food you've never tried before?"

"Imperial City food?" Evie offered.

"Hey." Chad perked up. "I haven't had that either."

And he'd lived in Auradon his entire life. Auradon, where it was ridiculously easy to get whatever kind of food you wanted if you put forth a little effort.

Queen Snow seemed to recognize this with a twitch of her brow, and then she was sliding into a smile. "Let's have that then."

She made sure each of them had leftovers to take back to their dorm rooms, and even made an extra shop at an ice cream parlor so they could all have a shot at building their own sundaes.

"You know, I watch people do this all the time," Chad exclaimed. "In commercials, I mean, um- it's nice to do it, though."

Harry had a feeling that Chad watched more from the bench across the street than he did commercials, seeing as this place was within walking distance to Auradon Prep. A few minutes later Queen Snow made plans to visit the following weekend, making Harry strongly theorize she'd put that much together as well.

"Your sister's super nice, Evie," Chad said. "I think it's just your family's inherent super power."

Evie's smile froze a little on her face. "My mom was still the evil queen," she reminded him gently.

The blond startled, his eyes going wide. "I'm- I'm sorry, I forgot. I'm so sorry, Evie, you're just so cool-"

He stopped when she drew him to a halt, and then Evie was hugging him, a level of physical affection she rarely shared with people outside of Harry, and she only did it with him for the sake of appearances.

On the Isle, such a statement would get you stabbed.

Here, in Auradon, Evie looked close to tearing up. "That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me," she murmured, pulling back so he could see her smile. "Thank you."

"Aw shucks," Chad said, his cheeks flushed dark. "If I can make you even a little bit as happy as you've made me, I'd be over the moon."

Low, stupid standards, and yet he meant them. Every word, he meant.

Harry would never understand Auradon.

-:-:-

Between the shopping trip and the stuff Evie decided to make for Chad, the blond had enough outfits that he could safely make it through the week looking as cute as he wanted. Queen Snow happily piled onto this when she recognized Chad's new style and his grandfather's tendency to stifle it, until Chad was sporting the most feminine version of male clothes ever.

He seemed happy with it, though, entirely more comfortable in his skin than he'd been when Harry had first met him. The only downside was that with this new confidence and the absence of his bullies, well, other people started to take note of Chad as well.

And thus the admirers came out of the woodworks.

Where the fuck they'd been when Chad was getting bullied, Harry didn't know, all he knew was that he'd gone to pick up the blond after third period and found him talking to some tall, lanky shit in a dumb, spiffy suit that was eighteen flavors of too earnest for Harry's taste.

Chad seemed equally confused by tall guy's attention, flushing when the other schmuck leaned too close and then lighting up when he caught sight of Harry.

"Sonny!" Chad chirped, immediately disengaging from tall guy and sliding his hand into Harry's. "Did you have a good morning?"

"Decent enough," Harry allowed, not liking how tall guy was now looking him over.

"Are you one of the new transfer students, then?" tall guy asked, and he was either practiced enough to hide his disgust or legitimately didn't care that Harry was from the Isle, though Harry couldn't tell which. "I'm Ben."

Ah, this was the Ben whose opinion meant so much to Chad for whatever damn reason.

That could be a problem.

"Sonny," Harry offered with a nod. "Nice to me ye."

"Likewise." Ben grinned, seeming to mean it, not awkward or put off by the way Harry dressed, though if he was suddenly into Chad, that might just be a kink for him. "Are you who Chad's been eating lunch with?"

"Yep," Harry said, and then he tugged Chad away, because Evie was the one who was good at talking and shit, not him.

"Ben's been way nicer to me lately," Chad explained when they got farther away. "I don't know why, though."

"It's your new confidence," Harry lied, but it was worth it to make Chad brighten up, worth it to earn his pleased grin because Harry really was a weak thing.

From then on, Ben always seemed to find a reason to linger, and Evie reported run-ins with him too.

"That's Prince Benjamin," she explained one day while Chad was at Tourney practice. "The future king of Auradon."

"That fucker has a girlfriend, doesn't he?" Harry asked. "Figured he'd have a roving eye."

"Hey," she said with a shrug. "You can always look, he just can't touch."

"And he'd better damn remember that," Harry growled, because Ben's opinion meant the world to Chad, which gave the tall shit a lot of power over their well-meaning blond.

It was something worth keeping an eye on, was Harry's point.

"I love it when you get all protective," Evie said, and it didn't even seem to be a lie, so it was perfectly respectable for Harry to blush then and there.

Obviously.

-:-:-

They got a week of blessed peace before the friends of the guys they got suspended became so affronted by their mere existence that they confronted them in one of the hallways that actually didn't have cameras. They still did it after school, with a few other kids lingering around, but for the most part it was just their trio against six disgruntled noble kids, all of them looking ready for a fight they had no chance of understanding.

"Think you're fucking tough?" their chosen spokesperson growled. "Think you can come here and taint Auradon with your girly shit? Think you can…" He trailed off when he noticed Harry taking off his backpack and purse and passing them over to Evie and Chad. "What are you doing?"

"Is this happening or what?" Harry asked, rolling his shoulders and shifting his weight to the balls of his feet for better maneuverability. "I might be wearing heels but that doesn't mean I can't kick your ass."

Next to him, Evie already had her phone up, and had likely been recording their stupid diatribe the entire time they'd been spilling it.

"Um." Spokesperson didn't seem prepared for the possibility that they might actually fight back, as though they hadn't grown up on the Isle. "Okay, you asked for it."

"Self-defense, Sonny," Evie reminded him. "They have to strike first."

"Yeah, I got it," Harry drawled, stomping into the fray with his hands curled into fists.

Suffice it to say, the afternoon ended with six assholes on the ground and only some minor bruising for Harry.

"Idiots," Harry groused, stepping over one of the unconscious shitheads before he retreated back to Evie. "Is this the kind of shit we have to report?"

Evie shrugged. "Maybe we should do it just in case."

Fairy Godmother viewed the footage with a sigh. "In the eyes of the law, Miss Sonny is clear, as technically she fought in self-defense against what was a clear threat."

"I'm sensing a 'but'," Harry drawled.

She sighed again. "Audradon Prep has a zero-tolerance policy towards any kind of fighting, so I'm afraid I'll have to give you a week of detention."

"Can we join her?" Chad asked. "Is that allowed?"

Fairy Godmother, who didn't seem to know what to do with the son of her goddaughter, managed a tight smile. "I'm sure the overseer wouldn't mind an additional face so long as you're quiet."

"Fucking stupid rules," Harry muttered when they left her office. "Makes me glad I broke their noses."

"Me too," Evie hummed. "We'll have to find a sneaky way to prevent these sorts of attacks in the future."

Further conversation was interrupted by no other than Mr. Tall-and-Lanky himself, Ben barreling around the corner in a power walk that was just barely not a run.

"Oh, good," he said upon seeing them, seeming relieved. "I heard someone tried to attack you guys, are you okay?"

"Physically, yes," Evie said. "Sonny took care of them. Mentally, no, because someone thought it was okay to attack us on the basis of wearing something they don't like."

"I'm sorry, guys," Ben said, seeming genuinely regretful. "That kind of stuff shouldn't happen. Your style is both cool and valid. They'll figure that out eventually, though um- I might have an idea as to how to make that work."

"You want us to eat lunch with you?" Evie countered, seeming to know where he was going.

Ben blinked, startled by her accurate deduction, then grinned. "I know it's dumb, but I'm kind of popular, and if people see you guys eating with me, they'll be more inclined to think your fashion's cool rather than be scared of it."

Or it could make them even bigger targets because those shitheads thought they were poisoning the more popular kids with their wicked ways.

Whatever, Harry would let Evie make those decisions.

"It would be a load off my mind?" Ben tried when Evie didn't immediately reply.

"Okay," she said eventually. "But if anyone makes us feel unwelcome, we're leaving."

"That's fair," Ben said, not seeming even slightly offended by the statement.

"Wow," Chad said later, when they were walking back to their dorm room. "I finally get to have lunch with Ben. Usually his table's full and I only see him during Tourney practice. You know, all the best people sit there – Audrey and Aziz and Lonnie and Ruby and um- sometimes Doug and Jane – Doug's my roommate, you'll like him, and Jane's my Fairy god-person! Except she's super shy so she doesn't talk a lot but she's still really great."

"We look forward to meeting her," Evie told him, earning another brilliant smile.

Yeah, seemed like they were gonna do a lot of things for that smile, but Harry didn't really care.

For Chad, it was worth it.

-:-:-

The only one that didn't seem happy with their presence was Ben's girlfriend Audrey, which was a grand total of not surprising given the circumstances.

They would have kept Chad between them were they not required to present as a unified couple, so instead they settled him next to his roommate Doug, who was there that day with Harry on his other side, Evie trading sweet talk disguised as very casual threats with Princess Audrey, who demonstrated the true meaning of passive aggression. Ben was just the right flavor of oblivious to miss this, though, so he didn't really seem to read his girlfriend's subtle ploys against Evie, the prince himself too invested in pulling Chad and Harry, for whatever damn reason, into a conversation.

Lonnie and Aziz seemed to know what was going on, though Jane and Ruby didn't, taking all conversation at face value while Harry just wanted to roll his eyes and be done with it.

Still, Chad seemed entirely thrilled by the affair, happily babbling on about Evie's talents and Harry's self-defense skills and the fucking pictures they drew in art class because Harry had to choose a creative elective and that seemed like the easiest one.

"You should try out for Tourney, Sonny," Aziz offered. "If you're interested. We could use people who can actually dodge."

"And then we could play sports together!" Chad chirped, ecstatic by this news. "If you want."

Harry shared a look with Evie. "I'll think about it," he said, which was enough for Chad.

"Wow," the blond said later when they were walking to their next class. "That was like, the best lunch ever. I mean, after all the lunches I had with you guys, obviously."

"I'm glad, sweetheart," Evie said, earning a dark flush from Chad, and for all that she'd spent the entire meal fending off Audrey, Evie seemed to have had a good time as well. Seemed rejuvenated now that she got to test her wits against someone who wasn't Harry.

Overall, it was a win.


-:-:-


Endnotes:

Harry and Evie cinnamon roll protection squad ENGAGED.

Thanks to everyone for the feedback! Seeing scheming Evie get support for her outlandish plans was a great boost to my day ^_^

Story notes:

"Have courage and be kind" is from the live action Cinderella remake, and was sort of a motto for Ella. They also didn't bother naming the captain of the guard in that movie, so I named him after his actor. Hence, Captain Anozie.

Sardinia is my name for Cinderellasburg, because yada yada, you know the drill, Cinderellasburg is a dumb name.

Until next time :)