Hi All, this took a real change of pace from where I wanted to go with it so I hope you enjoy it. I certainly enjoyed writing it. Greg Yates is such a nutjob that he's actually a writer's dream.

Disclaimer-Nothing here is mine.

TRIGGER WARNINGS for this chapter.

I intend to do one maybe two more chapters and then I will do a multiple update around Christmas. I always do this with whatever story I have and if you have followed my work you with know that. So if we get to December and there are no updates whatsoever please don't panic.

And thank you all for your kind words and advice with the sequel, I am currently not planning to do anything post this story as soon as this one is done. But I never say never with a story so it's always gonna be there, nagging at me to write it. Either way thank you all for your advice it is greatly appreciated.

We do go Very, VERY AU for the end of Season 2/beginning of Season 3 so please keep that in mind as well. If you were looking for a cannon story this was never going to be it.


Born Under A Bad Sign

Chapter 13-Hearts Still Beating

Greg Yates Part 1. Olivia Benson comes to Chicago, Will is a suspect, Hank and Jay are bitterly, perhaps fatally divided. Tragedy strikes the heart of Intelligence and in the past a short scene sees Hank and Jay negotiate their way forward after Jay's relapse (more future scenes than past in this chapter) so might be shorter.


18th February 2003


Jay woke up with the hangover from hell and realised that he had slept in for a day and a half.

And that he might have called Hank Dad.

Shit,

He staggered downstairs to see the man himself there buttering toast and seriously? Was the man just there? Was he there whenever Jay had a bad day? Was this something in the man's blood? Was there something that just woke him in events like this?

Jay wouldn't put it past him.

"Jay"

"Hank"

"Toast?"

"Coffee. Please"

"As you wish son"

Son. There it was. Son.

Bracketed between brackets.

Shit.

"I err…I think I relapse"

"You think?"

"Yeah I…I did. I did make it to the bathroom though I remember that"

Hank shot him a look. Jay tried to put sugar into his coffee but his hands were shaking with the after effects of his body drying out. The worst of his hangover might be over but that didn't mean the affect effects were going to be any less brutal.

And that was before you got to the fact that he called Hank Dad.

Shit he was so out on his arse.

"Where'd you get the vodka? Cause over the course of the last two days I've checked and it sure as hell wasn't from me"

"You do get that this is Chicago? It's not hard to get stuff you shouldn't."

Hank said nothing to that for a second and then…

"I want the name Jay, I want the name of the person before you leave the table. Because I do not know what that was the other night or what it was for but I am not having a repeat. I told you that if you stay here there were rules and one of those rules was that you stayed sober. Sure I don't mind the odd beer at a party because I'm not an idiot but I am not coming home to find you choking on your own vomit on some back ally vodka. And don't even think of deny it you were one drink away from getting your stomach pumped. I had to sit up all night just to make sure that you wouldn't choke on your own vomit"

Jay nodded looking down at his plate. In terms of a rebuke it was probably well deserved. And it could have been a lot worse. He knew he could have been thrown on his ass.

"Sorry"

"Yeah well…consider yourself grounded for the next three weeks. And you can come to work with me as well and be our universal coffee boy for the next three weekends"

Jay shot him a look and then he closed his mouth. There was a sense that he should not press while he was ahead. It was Hank's idea of a punishment and a gentle nudge in the career change and Jay didn't mind. He didn't want to be near Erin yet. She had not so much as even bothered to look at him and Jay was too raw to look at her.

Jesus. He was seventeen year olds and here he was broken hearted over a girl. He was like every cliché in the video store.

"Do you want to tell me what happened?"

He did…he really, really did but the truth of the matter was that he couldn't.

So he just shook his head.

"Alright then. You know where the bacon is"

Jay nodded.

It was better than he could expect.

Hank stood up and as he moved past Jay he tensed. It was old habit one that he had thought he'd grown out of but the truth was that you didn't grow out of stuff like that. Not when you had learnt that stuff from childhood.

No…no you didn't grow out of that.

You couldn't.

How could you?

Hank paused a little behind the chair and Jay felt his arm come around so that he was almost, kind of, sort of, hugging him.

"We do love you son" he said finally. "Even if you do make it so bloody hard to be mad at you sometimes."

Jay snorted but smiled.

Everything was still working.

Hearts still beating.


12th December 2015


"Sarge she's fitting up my brother for a crime he didn't do!"

Olivia Benson sighed next to him. Will Halstead looked between Hank and his brother with a slightly clueless expression and though he had never met the man (heard a little bit about him though) Hank had to wonder just what about Will Halstead, Elliot Stabler had suspected was criminal? Actually he was wondering weather or not Elliot Stabler had even bothered to investigate beyond Will. Hank might not know everything that took place between Jay, Will and their father but he knew people and Will Halstead might be a lot of things but he was not a killer.

At least…not to the extent that this person was. This person…whoever was raping, suffocating and then setting on fire these woman was beyond a killer…this person was evil.

And on principle Hank did not like to use that word lightly.

Will Halstead was not an evil man.

But Jay was looking at him as if he was one.

"You knew?" it was half whispered on the air as if it was being punched out of him and Hank couldn't do anything but look at his son who was looking between his brother and him like it was hard to believe.

"You knew?"

"Jay"

"You…you fucking…you…it's Will. He was in your house. Jesus fucking Christ Camille loved him! He's my brother Hank!"

And Wow…he had thought he had known about pain but the fact that he had seen the look on Jay's face right now was something that he had not considered before. He had never seen Jay look at him like that but now…

"Fuck Hank if you want to fuck Olivia Benson just do it—don't fuck Will over in the process"

WHAT THE FUCK?

And to make matters worse Erin chose that moment to stick her head around the door.

Her eyes went from Hank to Jay, to Will to Olivia Benson and then back again and then she raised one which was cue for Hank was going to have to ask some questions later that he really, really did not want to answer.

Because…look it was not like he was not human okay? He knew that he had not thought about it. But the truth, the bitter…endless…truth was that he was just not interested.

He was not interested in Olivia Benson in that way. He was not interested in any woman in that way. He'd fallen in love at the age of twenty two and he had never fallen out of love.

And that had been the end of that.

"Jay—"

Will again, understanding that his brother had gone too far and perhaps understanding that his brother had perhaps realised that he needed to speak.

"Hank?"

"What?"

"You ask me what you have to it's fine"

"Will—"

"JAY, IT'S FINE"

Jay smacked his hand against the door and then he was gone. Erin raised one eyebrow and then she was gone too. And that was that. That was the end of that.

Except it wasn't.

Not really.

It was just the beginning.


"Jay"

"Don't Erin…just…don't"

"Jay you don't think you might have gone too far—"

"It's my brother Erin! No! I do not think that I have taken a step too far"

"Look I know that there's more chance of the moon falling out of the sky tomorrow than Will being a serial rapist and killer okay? Hank does too. I bet even that twit who interviewed him in New York did too. But Olivia Benson has been carrying around this one for ten years and—"

"DO NOT DEFEND HER!"

Erin sighed. She had dragged Jay into her car and was looking very much as she wanted to smack his head against the steering wheel.

"I am not defending her, I am saying she did what we would have done in the same situation. She saw an opening and she grabbed it. To her he probably does look good for it. This is just a blip and Jay you really don't think you might have gone a tad too far with that?"

"No" Jay said. He had he knew but he wasn't going to admit it to Erin. Not when the anger was still coursing through his veins at a speed that would make anyone in the medical profession worried for his health…and his sanity.

Erin shot him another look.

"You know you've got to get up there and work with them" she said and there was a tinge of amusement in her voice.

"Yes…no why?"

"Because it's Will, if he doesn't remember where he was nine years ago which is not you know…out of the realm of possibility…then it looks bad. If he doesn't have a solid alibi for the last attack then that's just as worse. And don't think about saying he was with you because Olivia Benson is gonna see through that and it will only make things worse"

Jay sighed.

"You know" he said as he got out of the car. "The really fucked up thing is that the actual guy is gonna kill again. And we're here spending time with Will trying to prove what is fucking obvious to anyone with half a brain cell" he shook his head and if he slammed the door to the car shut with a bit more force than the department recommending then…then it was the car and not a perp.

Erin followed him back in with a small smile to help secure Will's alibi. Hank didn't look at him. Jay found that he was perfectly fine with that. What that meant for the state of their relationship he really didn't know.

But the coldness in the room when the rest of the team arrived did help them fix on Greg Yates a hell of a lot faster.

And he was the right guy.


"You gonna tell me why you and the kid are icing each other out again?"

"No"

Al didn't say anything for a second and then.

"You know I know right?"

"Erin called you?"

"No Trudy did. Adam and Kevin were half on the stairs when they heard Jay's little outburst and they scurried back downstairs to hide behind Mommy because Daddy and big brother were fighting"

"There are about fifty things wrong with that sentence you know?"

Al said nothing. Just took a drag of coffee with the same devotion that he had once done with cigarettes until Meredith had made him stop.

"Everyone knows?"

"Relax, I had a word with the children explained that you and Olivia Benson were not friends with case benefits and it was never to be discussed. Considering nobody and I cannot stress this enough Hank, nobody wants to imagine you like that and they are all pretty scared of me your good. But really, Will Halstead? You thought Will Halstead was a serial killer?"

"No I did not. I knew it was bull the second Olivia mentioned it to me but I thought it would at least get her off my back for a second. And…forget it's Will for a second, if it was anyone else we'd have followed that lead. Besides…Will might have known something"

"And you didn't think to pull your adoptive son aside and tell him all of that? Instead you caught him on the raw after a bad night and your surprised that he defend the only blood relative he's got with the strength of a fierce Momma Bear? Come on Hank! You and I both know that you can't get between the Halstead brothers! Even when you took Jay in Will was always there"

Hank said nothing. In truth he knew Al was right but he wasn't going to tell him that. Much like Erin and Jay though Al knew that he was right.

Al said nothing again and then with a speed that only Al could do said—

"So are you sleeping with Benson then?"

"No"

"But you want to?"

"No"

Al shot him a very unimpressed look.

"The one word answers were annoying when we were rookies. Now it's just depressing"

Hank said nothing. They were wating and watching for Greg Yates to arrive to speak to Erin and while he could hear Erin and she could not hear him it felt strange to be having this conversation with half of his team scattered around even if it was just him and Al in a warm car.

"I don't…I haven't…looked at anyone since Camille and you know that"

"I do"

"And you know I don't want to. I just…I can't replace that."

"I know that too" Al said as if he was speaking to a frightened child. "But I also know that Camille didn't want eternal loneliness for you either. And God knows you could do a lot worse. And she could do a lot better"

"Thanks partner"

"Your welcome partner"

"And I'm not alone. I have my kids"

"One's across the country, one's not speaking to you and the other one is stood on a bridge waiting to meet a serial killer"

"I have you"

"Yes" Al said grinning. "But I have a sex life"

And suddenly he was laughing because it was just funny.

(it wasn't really but Hank had learnt a long time ago laughing was better than crying)

And then he saw Greg Yates.

"Showtime"


"Hey Nadia"

"Hey Jay"

"You want a hand with that cake?"

"I thought you were all working?" Nadia said passing him the cake with a smile.

"I'm being punished"

"Oh I heard"

Great. Everyone knew then. Nadia smiled her sweet smile at him and Jay resisted the urge to stamp his foot. Everyone was out stalking the guy that they knew was good for this and here he was in the parking lot because he was being punished.

Which to be fair he kinda did deserve.

Crap this was going to take a lot of whiskey and a lot of grovelling.

"So Greg Yates? He your guy?"

"Yep" he said popping the P and resting the cake on the hood of her car.

"I suspected" Nadia said smiling. "I haven't seen the boss that protective since that case with Erin's brother"

Jay resisted the urge to snort. Everyone had a little bit of a soft spot for Nadia. Which reminded him for some utterly unknown reason—he really should check in with Mouse. He wanted…he wanted to talk to someone who would get him like Nadia and Erin had each other. He'd always had Mouse.

And he could already feel a bad night coming on.

And besides…Nadia and Mouse would be quite cute together.

Oh God he was matchmaking.

Somewhere in whatever was the great beyond, Camille was laughing her ass off.

"Jay?"

"Yeah"

"Greg Yates"

He didn't pick up on the tone of her voice until it was too late.

"What about him"

And then softly he felt someone come up behind him. Years of training kicked in and he didn't need Nadia to point to know.

"Behind you street rat"

Jay moved instinctually but Greg Yates got there first.

The iron pole came out and smacked into his face with enough force to knock him into the car. He felt something in his face, his cheekbones maybe shatter a little on impact and he knew blood was coming from somewhere. He fell to the floor staggered, seeing stars and by the grace of God he managed to keep awake.

Keep awake. Keep awake. Keep awake.

He'd been like this before. In the Army, lesson number one. You stayed awake no matter what. And before that. Lesson number one in Pat Halstead's household. You stayed awake because the second blow was always coming.

Keep awake. Keep awake. Keep awake.

Nadia screamed and moved but something…he couldn't see but then she was down and Jay moved towards her but he got a boot in his ribs for his trouble and suddenly he was furious.

He swung his legs under Greg Yates who taken by surprise staggered and fell. Jay moved out of old reflex and he staggered on top of the man getting in two punches but Greg Yates utterly unperturbed smiled and then…

It was a sharp pain somewhere alongside his ribs and Jay looked down for a split second distracted.

The flash of silver came back two, three, times and he realised with a horrible delayed reaction he was being stabbed.

Nadia was a crumpled little doll on the floor. They were in line of sight by the precinct but unless someone was watching the camera's then you wouldn't see what was happening.

Keep awake. Keep awake. Keep awake.

Keep awake. Keep awake. Keep awake.

Keep awake. Keep awake. Keep awake.

Keep awake. Keep awake. Keep awake.

Greg Yates yanked the knife out and Jay staggered. He felt what he thought might have been fingers in the blood but the pain was getting too much and he was starting to feel blood everywhere. Smelling it, feeling it. It was everywhere and he couldn't…he couldn't do it. He couldn't keep awake. Not even for Nadia.

He blacked out.

It was Nadia's death sentence.

But Jay was too far gone to realise that.


"Well that was a bust" Erin said throwing her coat on the chair with a bit too much venom for the situation.

"Not completely" Adam said ever the optimist. "Fire are still looking at this one, there's still hope he slipped up"

"Alright" Hank said rubbing a hand over his eyes. "Get everyone back here and we'll start it from scratch get Nadia and Jay and—"

"Where are Nadia and Jay?"

That was Al and Hank opened his eyes. He had completely forgot.

The only words that he had spoken to Jay since their…disagreement was that he was to stay here. Punishment until he could figure out weather or not he wanted to strange his boy or not.

Seriously Justin had never been this…

Oh wait…yeah that was a bad example all things considered.

"Nadia went for your birthday cake" Kevin said after a long look with Adam who just sighed and rolled his eyes. "I guess Jay went with her"

Hank was going to kill this kid he was, he really, really was. What part of do not leave did he not get. And Nadia because with a serial killer with a fetish for young brunettes on the loose it was so the right time for Nadia to be out in the open. Hell, he knew that Al had called Meredith and told her to all but chain Lexie to the nearest radiator.

"Kevin find Trudy and see—"

"Yeah boss on it"

"What part of I didn't want a birthday party did you idiots not get?"

"Aw come on Erin it's not everyday you turn thirty, I mean my God it's almost middle aged"

"THIRTY IS NOT MIDDLE AGED YOU LITTLE SHIT"

"AL SHUT THE FUCK UP! Can we all please get back to our jobs?"

"Sorry Sarge"

Day care, this was what this was. Day care. Fisher must be thrashing in his grave laughing at his expense.

"Sarge?"

"Kevin?"

"Eh Jay went out to meet Nadia according to one rookie, she went by herself but nobody downstairs remembers them coming back up"

Wait what?

That was…odd. Jay was stickler for signing out and singing back in and he knew that Trudy had lectured Nadia on it when she'd forgotten two weeks ago. It had turned into one of those impromptu lessons she had shouted to the downstairs lot. You signed in and you signed out. That was how the person on the Front Desk knew who you were and where you were.

"Jay didn't sign back in?" Erin said frowning. "Christ you must have really pissed him off"

"Doing my job Erin"

"Yeah but…hang on let me call him see where he is"

She put the phone to her ear and Hank watched her. There was something here…he knew it…something…gut instinct if you wanted, was telling him something was off. There was no way Jay was upset enough to forget his training. There was no way that it should take this long to get a cake and bring it back. But he was too tired and too emotionally raw to put the pieces together. Instead the picture was just there…missing the big pieces.

"He's not picking up" she said looking at him. "Let me try Nadia"

But something already told him that Nadia was not going to pick up either.

"Adam ping his phone"

"Yes boss"

He picked up his own phone and found Jay's number and pressed call.

Again it went to voicemail.

"Boss?"

"What?"

"He's outside in the back car parking lot"

"You sure?"

"Well his phone is"

What the hell?

Erin was already putting her gun back on her face set as if she was preparing for a mortal blow.

Hank followed.

It was one of those brilliant Chicago winter nights, stars in the sky and a freezing temperature to boot. It wasn't snowing but it was below freezing and with a swoop that only a parent could know he realised Jay had not taken his coat with him. But then why would he? He had only gone down the backsteps to help Nadia with the cake?

Erin breathed a little near him and then.

"Clear"

Hank rounded the corner.

"What the fuck is going on?"

"There's your car Erin" Adam ever so helpfully pointed out.

Erin nodded and she moved ahead of him Adam behind her and Hank following when suddenly she stopped.

And then she screamed.

Adam ran the short distance to meet her and then he stopped. One look at his face told Hank all he needed to know.

He had known it was Jay before he had even come round the car.

And there he was.

He had been left there by the side of the car as if he was a piece of trash but the blood

Hank didn't think there would ever be enough words to describe the blood.

It was everywhere.

It was on Jay's face and it was all over his stomach and it was still leaking out of him. Jay himself underneath it was the colour of snow.

"Oh my God" Erin was saying, she kept saying it over and over and her hands were shaking like she wanted to touch but she couldn't and he was aware that Adam was shouting down a phone for a bus but he couldn't…

Couldn't move, couldn't breathe.

Jay…

Jay crumpled on the floor.

Jay dead.

Dead. Dead. Dead. Hank's son dead and—

Smack!

Something hit him hard from the side and he turned pulled out of his thoughts instantly. Adam looking very much as if he knew he was going to be in trouble for that when Hank regained the power of…well…anything…had punched him back to reality.

"Is he alive?"

"I don't…I can't…"

And then it snapped into him. He was the boss. He was in charge. Jay didn't need a terrified parent right now he needed his boss. And so he spoke and he was marginally proud that his voice didn't shake.

"Erin move. Adam where is Nadia?"

"She's not here, signs of a struggle though"

Shit. If he was to assume this was Yates then he'd done this after he had left Erin and that meant that he had Nadia.

Pushing aside that thought for a second he focused on what was in front of him.

Jay.

"Hank I can't find a pulse"

Oh God.

No.

Please. Please. Please.

He couldn't either. But that didn't mean he was dead. Wasn't there something about cold and the body and…and something?

"Adam get on his pulse and tell me when you've got something"

"Yes boss"

And so he started CPR.

Come on kid, just breathe for me. Just breathe, just for me. Just do it for me.

He didn't know if it had did any good.

Camille please, please don't let me loose another one.

Adam was shaking next to him, Erin was sobbing and all he could do was just keep pressing down.

Please, please, please.

Please.

Come on kid just fight for me. Come on Jay.

"Come on Jay"

But Jay didn't hear him.

Jay didn't hear him.

And Hank didn't know if there was any kind of hell beyond this but he knew he had to try. He hadn't given up on the kid yet.

"Come on Jay" Adam muttered still scrambling for a pulse.

Erin was sobbing and he could hear sirens over her cries and all Jay had to do was hang on until they got here but…

But Jay didn't hear him.

Jay didn't hear him.


And there you go, God that was hard to write, but I hope you enjoyed it and I will do my best to bring you the next one sooner rather than later.

Next Chapter-Greg Yates Part 2-Jay in hospital, Will is beyond furious, Erin is on the warpath and Hank...there are no words for what Greg Yates will suffer when Hank Voight catches up with him.