Day 17! And, even better, I have a virtual day at school tomorrow because of the weather. So, hopefully, one's finished before 2 in the morning. Today's chapter summary: Peter trying to explain why he lets Neal stay over as much as he wants.


Neal was making his exit. He had been invited over to Peter's for dinner (El had insisted) and it had run a little long. And by 'a little long,' it was almost eleven o'clock at night, and they'd started at six. Five hours were whittled away with good conversation, good food, and a little more alcohol than was entirely smart for three adults to consume. The sky was pitch-black, not even dotted with stars, and Neal was trying to make a French exit. His goal was to leave before Peter and El noticed that he was gone. It hadn't worked.

"Neal," Elizabeth said, semi-commanding. Her tone was most accurately described as the way a parent tells a teenager sneaking out their window to get back in bed.

Neal held back a sigh before turning back around, releasing the doorknob. I guess I actually have to say goodbye. "Yeah?"

"It's late," El pointed out, as if Neal didn't notice. "And, if you don't want to find a way back to your home..."

Neal stared at Elizabeth. Was she...what? "Are you..." He tried to find the right words to ask what he meant. Eventually, he found a close-enough sentence. "Are you letting me stay overnight?"

El nodded. "Of course." The way she said it, it sounded like the most obvious thing that could ever be said. Like she thought it wasn't entirely worth pointing out in the first place.

Neal glanced over to Peter, asking him to confirm or deny El's statements. "Don't fight her," Peter supplied. He'd learned early on in his marriage that she had a way of getting what she wanted. "We'd be happy to let you stay," he tacked on at the end.

Neal blinked. They were actually welcoming him into their house. Neal couldn't remember anyone actually welcoming him. Inviting out of obligation, sure. Offering because they wanted something from him, definitely. But welcoming him? That wasn't something people did to Neal Caffrey. Wasn't something FBI agents tended to do to Neal Caffrey. Huh. His eyes darted back and forth between El and Peter, who looked back at him almost expectantly. Peter was a mix between concerned and suspicious, while El was more motherly and inviting mixed with confused.

Neal took a few staggering steps back into the home. At the very least, he'd let them explain before saying 'no.' Well, I'll probably say no. Might change my mind. He managed to make it to the couch in their living room before his legs gave out from under him. Neal's mind was reeling from the strange sensation of being wanted in someone's home.

"Neal?" Peter asked. The young man looked strange, and Peter needed to know he was okay.

Elizabeth took the seat on Neal's left and tilted her body to face Neal as best she could. "Are you okay?"

Neal nodded. His silver tongue seemed to have melted and left him incapable of speech. That's inconvenient.

"Do you want anything?" El asked. It was half out of courtesy and half out of concern. Knowing Neal, something would be coffee or being left alone. The former, she'd be happy to oblige. The latter...no way.

Neal shook his head, still mute. He buried his face in his hands, cutting off all senses except hearing. It was easier to process the world when he only had to hear instead of process facial expressions and body language and spoken language. It always seemed to help when he was overwhelmed. And he was certainly overwhelmed. It would be a few minutes at least before he recovered his powers of speech. Hearing was a thing he could do easily, processing what he heard, slightly easier. Answering seemed to be impossible at the moment.

El glanced down at the young man shutting down in front of them. She looked up over his shoulders to her husband. Peter shrugged. He didn't know what to do. Why did El assume he knew what to do? This wasn't a situation he ended up in very often. He didn't even know Neal did that! El shook her head minutely, whether at her husband or surrogate son, she wasn't sure. She did what she thought was best. She put a cautious hand on Neal's shoulder. He didn't flinch, but he didn't lean in either. All he did was stay frozen like a statue.

"Neal, honey?" she asked. He seemed to react to the term of endearment. That's progress. "Do you want to talk?"

Neal took a few deep breaths. What's happening around me? He'd learned that the best way to cope with these situations, where something was suddenly spiraling out of his control, was to assess them clinically, then factor in emotions. Okay. One: he was sitting on the couch in the Burke's living room. It felt familiar and was reassuring. Two: he could hear El and Peter talking to him. That was good. He liked those voices. Three: El's hand was on his shoulder. That was...good. It wasn't bad, which Neal guessed made it good. Four: he was being offered a place for the night. He still wasn't sure how he felt about that. Five: El was giving him the choice to speak. Most people assumed he was lying or trying not to lie if he shut down. But, El was asking. And, the answer was...yes. He did want to talk. Didn't expect to get my voice back this quickly.

"Why?" was all Neal managed to say. Okay, maybe I haven't found my voice.

"Why what?" Peter asked. The couch sank down on Neal's other side. Peter was sitting down. Good. He's nearby enough, but won't touch me. This is fine. I'm still in control of my surroundings. This is safe.

"Why are you letting me stay overnight?" Neal had regained enough control to feel safe opening his vision again. He lifted his head and let his hands fall limply in his lap.

"Why shouldn't we?" Peter asked in response. "Are you going to steal something? Commit some other felony that I should care about?"

Neal blinked. Auditory processing, still not 100%. He shook his head. "No."

"Then why shouldn't we let you stay overnight?"

Neal tried to stop his thoughts spiraling. It was safe, he was safe. This was a situation he was in control of. Nothing was going not to plan. Everything was going not to plan. But it was okay. It was okay. These were people he liked. Everything was safe.

"I...Because I'm an adult?" Neal managed as a response. Speaking, definitely good now. "With my own home?"

"You don't have your own home," Peter quipped.

He's got a good point there. "Okay," was Neal's only response. There wasn't another good way to answer that. 'Okay' was enough information.

Peter seemed very out of his depth. His lovely wife decided to take over and start answering for him. "It's late. You're not going to find a cab at this time of night. And I'm pretty sure Peter doesn't want to drive."

Neal switched from staring at Peter to staring at El. Or, rather, staring at the wall over El's left shoulder. He was still a little too overwhelmed to process facial expressions. The appearance of eye contact was enough. "But...you're actually welcoming me into your house? Your home?"

El nodded. Neal relaxed a little bit more. "Of course. Like Peter said, why shouldn't we?"

Neal took a few deep breaths in and out. El's hand was a constant pressure, but the good kind. It was a welcoming pressure, not an insistent one. "Why do you care?" he managed. "Shouldn't it be my problem what I'm doing with my life?"

"It is," Peter answered again. "But what you're doing with your life is very different from where you're staying for the night."

"Okay," Neal repeated. "I get that. I understand that." His mouth-to-brain filter was disintegrating. Not good. El moved her hand to Neal's hand and it felt better. Really good. Someone holding him in a way that means they care. That's good. "I mean, I would love to stay overnight," he continued, filling his tone with the politeness he learned through a long career of manipulating people. "But I wouldn't want to impose. I mean, I wouldn't force myself into your-"

Peter cut him off. "Neal. Stop talking."

That almost sent Neal over the edge. That was so different to the way he expected the conversation to go. He had a plan on how to get out. He had a plan on how to refuse staying. He had a plan on what to do on every step along the way. And then Peter had to go and throw a monkey wrench in every single plan. Neal stopped talking.

"We're not letting you stay over because we pity you or want you to do anything for us or are forcing you to impose on our lives."

Neal looked over at El. She was more reassuring and facial expressions were slowly coming back to him. She nodded gently. "Yes. Peter's telling the truth."

"So, why are you letting me stay over?" Why can't he just spit it out?

"Because we care about you," Peter finally said. Wasn't that hard to say, both men thought. Peter continued. "You can stay over as long as you ask before. For as long as you want. And if you want to leave in the middle of the night, go for it. We're not keeping you in here."

"Like I'm in a prison?" Neal quipped. Sarcasm had returned. He was still a little close to overwhelmed, but he was definitely closer to the normal mask on his face than full-on shutting down in front of two people he respected.

Peter looked ashamed, if Neal had to guess. "Yeah." He went back to something neutral before finishing up his point. "As long as you want to stay, as soon as you want to leave. Understand?"

Neal had to clarify. "And all I have to do is ask?"

Elizabeth nodded and gave a soft squeeze to his hand. "You're always welcome to join us."

Neal had his normal conman mask firmly over his face. They'd seen enough of the real Neal Caffrey for one day, thank you very much. He managed a sincere thank you before standing. "I think I will stay the night, at least."

"That's perfectly all right," El answered. And it was.


So, somehow in the process of writing this, Neal ended up as autistic. High-functioning, but still autistic. I don't know how this happened. But it did, and I don't exactly mind. It seems like he definitely gets hyperfixated on some things (did you see how many books he had on music boxes?). But, if you didn't like it, that is an opinion you are perfectly entitled to. I apparently like headcanoning characters as neurodivergent. Long post-script over, please leave a review if you especially enjoyed it. To those in NaNoWriMo, I know it seems hard right now, but let me give you the best advice I've ever gotten. You just have to crescendo through it and the end will be great!