Opera put the finishing touches on their latest project. "Opera, please tell me why there's a giant steel door on the kitchen wall?" Ms Midoriya asked.
"I'm keeping the potential danger zone quarantine, I wish to keep the potential destruction at a minimum." They answered promptly. "Madam, your son and his friends have the best intentions out of anyone in the netherworld, but you've never dealt with the full force of the Calamity Cult before."
"Don't be ridiculous. I know Clara can go a little overboard with her imagination, but she wouldn't hurt a fly." She was unaware of how brutal grocery shopping can get in the Valac household.
"But this time you're exposing the group to an unlimited supply of chemicals and heat. The danger is far too great for most demon-kind, and on the off chance a bio weapon is formed, it is my duty to make sure you're all contained before we work on an antidote."
"Eiko and Izuku work on magical items all the time, I'm sure she can handle a little flour and vegetable oil." Those items alone could be made into a deadly toxin. "Plus Ameri's with them. She seems like the most responsible of my baby's friends." Responsible, yes. Overly imaginative and prone to get carried away, double yes on both accounts.
The doorbell was heard, ringing with tolls of death and destruction. The danger has arrived. "I shall greet them, I suppose." Opera walked up and opened the door on the three … four girls? "Forgive me, but I did not expect Gaako to arrive."
"I figured it couldn't hurt to learn something else, Dad taught us cooking but it never really … was meant for regular people." Right, she had a craving for raw flesh. Pretty sure that's why Izuku was still cautiously weary around her.
"Either way, we're here to learn how to cook!" Eiko charged right in. "We'll learn and I'll be able to provide something essential for Izu and our three and a half children!"
"I still never agreed to a three way." Ameri huffed. "But still, we're all here, learning from Izzy's mother..I'm bonding with the in-laws! I already have her blessing...YES! Everythings finally coming together for me!"
"This is going to be super fun! Cooking time With Mamadoriya and Operako." Clara was dead wrong, Opera would be safely out of the blast radius.
"Alright girls, put on the aprons and follow me. Grab the nearest spatula and we'll get started."
"What's a spatula?" The three girls chasing Izuku's affections tilted their heads. They needed to double down on the shielding.
Inko forgot what it was like when Izuku was young, before his quirklessness came up. The stress of raising a toddler/baby for a good few years of her life. She now remembered through interacting with these destructive fiends.
Ameri had a good heart, and was leaning quite well, but her strength and interpretation was WRONG! A pound of sugar doesn't mean you pound the bowl with a bag of sugar, and thinly sliced doesn't mean you cut the board, and fine roasted doesn't mean set it on fire until it's black!
Eiko followed the instructions too well, she used chemical formulas and algorithms to measure things so finely that the end result tasted bland or was off kilter by a mile. And when she 'experimented' it resulted in a sentient food monster that had to be put down.
And Clara...sweet..beautiful Clara...her idea of cooking was throwing everything she liked into a pot all at once and stir it into some sort of soup, then dance around it like it was some sort of ritual. The song she was singing at least explained why she was doing it, and it was catchy to boot.
Meanwhile, Gaako was proportionally inept. She was used to her family cooking for a kingdom, so she literally tossed EVERYTHING into the recipes. Five fish for a simple sushi roll. A whole cow for a hamburger. A hundred giant strawberry-like fruits for a simple smoothie! Given her father's height, this was probably what she was used to on the daily, but not everyone has the appetite of an entire city!
The saddest part was that the only improvement she made was teaching Gaako about heating up food, everything else crashed and burned with these crazy girls! "Ho-how! How have any of you survived this long if this is what you do with Izuku daily!?"
"What are you talking about Mamadoriya, this is just super fun like all the time!" Okay, so Clara has the answer of viewing THIS as playing and having fun. Need to reassess how safe her baby is with them.
"All the danger in the world is worth it if it means Izu is safe and sound." Awe, thank you Eiko, even if it sounded a bit deranged at this point.
"Sanity and spite." Gaako spoke bluntly. Eh, she was dating Asmodeus, she shouldn't be surprised by that answer.
"To be fair, Izzy and I's reading never gets crazy at all. We just sit down together and simply talk about our futures together. It's actually the most relaxing part of my week just being with him." Ameri was blushing fondly at that. Okay, so she's the most stable of this group of crazies. So far she had the most brownie points. If only she didn't turn the actual brownies into charcoal.
Inko sighed. "Izuku's probably having a much better time right now." Then again with his luck he may just be running for his life.
"Go up, you hero, up!"
"I'm going up, they're just too fast! What do we have for cover?"
"Smokescreen, go for it!"
Shakky listened to Lied and his gaming buddy chat inside of his room, a little ticked. And here she made him promise to keep quiet. A promise that seemed nonexistent at this point as her anger boiled.
"So when did you have that horn? Or was that always a thing with you?"
"Nope, complete surprise. I never thought I'd get one ever to be honest. Not complaining though. Just hope I don't have to put a hole in my favorite hoodie now."
"Oh it's all about the wiggle room, you've gotta angle it when you're at the widest point."
"Really? I need to try that. Anyway, this game rocks you know."
"You're the one with the latest system, I'm just the one that knows how to exploit the best parts."
"Yeah, I actually had to research what this was. Don't know too much about all the systems around here. Still branching out and all that."
"Dude, I'm completely jealous of you being rich, but how can you enjoy it when you're so sheltered?"
Alright, what went on for far too long needed to stop now. She needed beauty rest damn it! She marched up to the door and kicked it down. "Pipe down you brats, can't you see I'm working?"
"Oh, sorry mam-" The admittedly cute demon tried, with manners, to apologize before her brother stepped in.
"You don't work a day in your life bitch. All you do is mooch around and try to be the best gold digger you can manage." He tried futilely to call her out.
"I work hard to perfect my beauty! It's not easy getting this body ready you know! That's a full-" She paused, looking back at her brother's guest. "Who's this?" She asked, getting a closer look at the kid.
"This is Midoriya. My guest. We're playing games if you don't mind." Lied grumbled.
It was then she noticed the console … brand new … he was rich. "Well a guest needs to be treated right." She quickly slammed the door shut, rushed into her closet, and came back wearing the fanciest dress she could find.
"You don't need to dress up for my sake, the casual atmosphere is actually really relax-"
"Izuku, that look in her eye, she's in gold digger mode!" Lied tried to warn the boy.
"Don't give Our only guest the wrong idea, Liedy-boy!" She shoved her brother to the side, doing her best to keep him down on the ground. "I'm simply going the extra mile to make him comfortable. Did you even clean your room before he came here?"
"Of course I did! I made sure the magazines were out of sight on the off chance Eiko broke in." Oh right, the supposed 'better sister'.
"Eiko wouldn't do that, Lied. She'd knock on the door with a mallet, but she wouldn't break in." So this Eiko was her competition, eh?
"Well, in any case, I'm glad you made it semi-presentable." She strolled up to Midoriya and curved her tail around his waist. "What about a proper snack? I just so happen to have some in MY room. We can head there together and get to know each other better."
"Listen, I just got Love Bunny rumors going and I'm not adding fuel to that fire." He deadpanned at her.
"Oh, a challenge … then how about I make you redder than the sun?" She asked with a finger tracing his body, and suddenly found her brother attacking her from behind. "What the hell Lied!?"
"Don't worry Izuku, I'll protect the little innocence you have left!" Her brother pulled on her hair, sending them both out of the room, where her brother rolled her up into a rug before she could find the strength to get back up. "Seriously, out of all the guys you can seduce, Izuku is on top of the list of no!"
"Oh come on, he'd enjoy a little one on one." She grumbled. "And you're having so much fun with that brand new system, don't deny it!"
"I am, that's why I'm protecting him to begin with!" He shouted, shutting the door. Wow, he's grown into liking something almost as much as games … that was a nice development. She'd do the sisterly thing and just spy on them with her ear against the door.
"Your sister seems nice." She heard Midoriya admit. Yes! Success. Just a little more work and he'll be hers!
"I'd be mad, but I know how dense you are." Lied responded. "Speaking of, what kind of girl are you into?"
"I … never thought about it." She heard him admit. "I just never thought I could get a girl." Okay, now she wanted to hug the boy for reasons beyond his fat wallet.
"Your popularity and rumors say otherwise."
"The rumors are based on circumstances, bad timing, crappy luck, and girls that just like popular guys." She could feel Midoriya's eye roll from the door. "I can't name a girl who seriously wants to be in a relationship with me."
"… You are a very stupid man." Lied spoke.
"What … what!?"
"Well, we have to wait at least an hour for the fumes to die down." Inko spoke, gesturing to Opera in a hazmat suit. "So why don't you girls go and explore Izuku's room?"
"E-explore Iz-Izzy's room!" Ameri found herself hyperventilating. Going into the room of the man she loved! The next step would be being invited into said room all alone with the boy studying all alone and then they start getting closer to each other on the bed and..
"Oh, we get to see the hero posters again!" … Right, the three next to her likely already have spent time there. She was a little behind, but screw it, she would take this step and overcome them eventually! Clara laughed, turning into a ball and rolling. "Hero time!"
"She's not actually considering being a hero, right?" Ameri had to ask out loud. "I mean, she did well against the Panther Rat, but I'm not sure if she's serious or not." Not to mention that SHE already decided to take her father's place at Border Control, and eventually his spot at the thirteen crows, so her career path already aligned with Izzy's.
"I mean she's going to stick with Izu like glue, so she's either going to be a sidekick, or a demon king secretary." Eiko muttered as she walked. "Of course the position of Demon King harem member belongs to me!" And there was that pack of problems to deal with. It wasn't that she didn't like women, she just preferred the romantic intimacy of two people, alone, by the sunset as they held hands, leaning in on each other and whispering the secrets of their hearts as their lips reached closer and closer …
"It's sad that we even start to believe the rumors just a little." Gaako rolled her eyes as they made their way to the door. "I know he's too dense to ever accept the idea, but that seduction mist should've tipped him off at least. Ugh, I still remember trying to cuddle him. So unpleasant."
"Yes, unpleasant." How Izzy kept getting into these situations was beyond her. Well, she was here, as his rock to keep him balanced. Now she needed to devise a system to monitor everyone that legitimately believed in Izzy trying to form a mass orgy.
They walked into Izzy's room, which was about the same size as her room … barring the multitude of notebooks scattered, and hero memorabilia posted all over the room. "Oh, so that's where he got the name from." She followed Gaako's gaze onto a poster of …
"R Rated Hero, Midnight?" Ameri felt her eye twitch just a bit.
"Oh, he explains it in this journal." Eiko spotted a notebook under the book. "'Hero Analysis for the future #15. OFA addition'."
"Izuku-kins has really good drawing skills, they're super lifelike." Clara smiled as they flipped it open.
"Midnight Special-Inspiration: R-rated Hero: Midnight. Original Ability-Somnambulist: Capable of knocking out enemies for an extended period of time. 15-minutes for women. 30-minutes for men."
"Weird that he worded it ability …" Gaako slowly muttered. He was smart enough to know Demons might stumble across or steal it. That's her lzzy-kun!
"He's got a lot of books over here … oh, here's 'Demon Analysis for the future #2.'" Eiko spoke, opening it to … "This one is weird." The girls looked over for a lot of scratched out marks, one word was visible, 'romantasist'.
"I think he was trying to word it to me so my self opinion didn't change …" Sad to see it took him nine whole pages to just say 'Self Worth = Strength'.
'"Note-don't attempt at any point in the future. Activation will cause immediate strength depletion. Ask source for advice at a later date."' Aw, he's already thinking about her and writing down his thoughts about her! Their relationship has truly bloomed.
"Alright, self worth is still a problem." Gaako said as they just started scavenging the room at this point. "I've got books about classmates, teachers, this one is about his suit. Huh, mentioned using Azz and Kerori's as a smokescreen."
"Well during the whole experience we never actually ran from a problem, so there was probably no need to use it." Eiko justified. "Hey, he's got a lot of materials here." They looked at jars, labeled 'Weapon Creation Testing', each with a sticky note on them. "Ix pheromone combos-DO NOT OPEN!'"
"Wait, does that mean he's been combining Elzabetta's bloodline with more than one person's?" Gaako had to ask out loud. "Midnight Special was invasive enough."
"Who cares about that! If this stuff is what I think it is, then it should be...AHA!" Eiko jumbled through the canister's, lifting one up high in the sky. "Found it! Now I can see if Izu likes me!" Wait what!? "According to Elizabetta it doesn't work on people the user likes."
She could feel her heartbeat faster. This was an option, just growing closer through knowing how he felt about her! This was so fast, the yes or no in that jar was too much. "Let's open it!" Clara, why were you so bold!?
"Wait a second!" Gaako spoke. "Besides the fact that I don't want to be exposed to that stuff, if we just open it up he'll know." Oh right, they were invading Izzy's privacy essentially...but wasn't all fair in love in war? That's why Haunaru snuck into that locker to see if Kakaro was cheating on her!
"I think opening it would be a fair question, we're curious after all."
"Curious enough to open the bottle that says explicitly in red marker 'Do not Open' in all caps?" Gaako, stop bringing logic to the conversation! It's not wanted! "Look, Izuku's essentially the little brother I'd rather have than the ones I do, so I'd rather not go horny for my little brother. I have Azz for that."
"Don't worry about it Gaako, if you're exposed to it, it means Izzy doesn't like you that." And as if being attracted to Izzy-kun was any kind of curse to bear. She'd punt her out the window for it, but at least Ameri didn't have to worry about the dragon being competition.
"Obey Izu … be curious … obey Izu … be curious…" Eiko seemed like she was picking a flower with how she kept going back and forth.
"You guys are all missing the obvious answer." They turned to Clara. What was this obvious answer? "We don't open it, we break it!" And with that, she threw it onto the ground.
"WHY!?" They all screamed at the moronic child! The only response they got as the pheromones climbed was laughter.
One minute passed. Two minutes passed. Three…"I'm not affected! I don't want to cuddle up and kiss Izu! At least, not any more than I already do!" Eiko screamed. "IT WORKED! I KNEW IT!"
"I'm fine too, I just want to play with Izuku-kins and kiss him after the festival like always." Wait what?
"I'm of sound mind too." YES, YES, YES! FUCK YES! IZZY-KUN LOVED HER! Okay, he liked the other two as well, but FUCK YES, now she knew for sure love was possible to bloom!
"Wait, I'm fine too...that shouldn't be right." Gaako looked to herself. "I went horny lizard for the first time...what the hell changed?"
"There can only be one explanation." They turned to Eiko, who looked at the bottle with shame. "It was a dud."
"No, I saw the young master work to place the pheromones in the jar myself. I had to get rid of a lot of cats that night." Opera entered the room, unaffected by the pheromones too.
That was indeed odd … "We'll have to talk with Elizabetta tomorrow, see how we can determine what happened-were you watching us the whole time?"
"As long as it's not my kitchen, chaos is amusing."
Nafra sat nervously as the girls drank tea and chatted. "Hey, are you doing okay?" Madam president asked her.
"Why … didn't … Smoke … come?" She asked. She already had to take off the hood, now she was nervous as hell.
"Oh, she's not involved with this like we are." Madam President explained, setting her down in a room full of girls she vaguely remembers from the Harvest Festival. Mainly Oni and Valac for teaming up with the Honor Student like Nafra-like she did.
"Yeah, she essentially called an emergency meeting of the girls of the Calamity Cult." Crocell explained to her, sipping a cup of tea right next to Ix. "Called the rest of us in a hurry, so we all just kind of dropped what we were doing."
"Why….how...am...I...Calamity...Cult?"
"You were with Izu for half of the exam, that seems like a decent ticket in." Oni shrugged, taking a bite out of her pastry. "But don't worry, we won't put any pressure." The girl smiled. "We just talk about things like boys, dreams, dresses, maybe a bit of magic." For some reason Oni stared at Ix for that last sentence.
"You're curious about Izuku's pheromones and who they affect." Ix smiled knowingly. "I figured this conversation would come sooner or later, but I expected the boy himself to come to me first before anyone else."
"We broke a jar of the stuff inside of Izuku-kins room and Dragon Lady wasn't affected that time!" Valac shouted out. "It was a confusing rip off!"
"Except Opera confirmed the stuff was real, and they weren't affected by the stuff either." Madame president shuddered a bit. "So unless Izzy is hiding some very confusing feelings about his butler, we need actual confirmation on how this stuff works." Madam president really needed to just tell the boy directly, Nafra would support her the whole way however.
"Oh it's quite simple, we Ixs believe that liking something is pure, so the original Ix created the bloodline that would draw out whoever they could truly trust and confide in, along with love and cherish. Anyone not worthy of this would be cursed into depravity and sorrow." Ix explained with a smile as she drank some more tea.
"So in other words...it doesn't work if that someone likes you on at least a platonic level?" Oni looked like a boiling pot. "Oh come on! That only confirms we're friends! Something I already knew!"
"Back to square one." Madame grumbled. Seriously, just talk to the boy, not like Nafra ever could, but Madame had confidence and lovely looks in spades.
"I mean it makes sense, imagine if it was used on your own parents." Everyone went silent as Ix's revelation.
"Yeah, don't taint the image of Mamadoriya like that." Koopa winced, before her eyes widened. "Wait, does this mean Izuku didn't like me at all before the Harvest Festival, because I was affected the first time."
"Can't be, Izuku-kins is your friend!" Valac shouted.
"Also it worked on me, and he likes me, right?" Everyone was quiet as they started disappointedly at Crocell. "Oh come on, you try to take over a forest and kill a girl one time, and suddenly you're the bad guy."
"I mean, you never really apologized, or at least made up for trying to voodoo him." Oni held up a doll of Midoriya. "Other than selling these adorable dolls of him to everyone at school, which actually makes up for halfway in my opinion."
"Also, I'm the girl you tried to kill." Koopa deadpanned, biting into a biscuit.
"I tried to kill you, you tried to kill me, by gones be by gones." Crocell shrugged.
"Starting to see how Izzy has slowly lost it at this point." Madame spoke with a sweat drop. "Well, let's agree to one thing here: Mamadoriya is the best cook."
"Agreed." Everyone, even Nafra had to say as they took a bite of something they brought over called Katsudon. "I'm starting to see why Izzy eats this stuff all the time." Oni ate.
"Well, let's also agree to not open any more jars, especially ones full of seduction mist." Gaako sighed.
"So you're saying I shouldn't break this jar either?" Valac lifted up a jar labeled 'Experimental Pheromones 06. HIGHLY UNSTABLE-DON'T EXPOSE TO OXYGEN!' That one just screamed danger, who in their right minds would-aaand it's broken, lovely.
"Eiko, which bloodline did he mix this with?" The mist covered mainly Ix, Crocell, and Nafra herself as Oni flipped through a notebook.
"06, 06, 06...AHA...it's Balam-sensei's. It's meant to be a truth telling serum. But due to the large mana imbalance it causes unstable reactions if you tell a lie instead of just making you tell the truth."
"Not again!" Crocell yelled out. This happened before? "Okay, so we just need to be as truthful as possible, right?"
"I'm more curious what 'unstable reactions' mean." Koopa spoke out, looking at her own hands in concern.
"Let's test it out!" Valac. "Do any of you like Izuku-kins! As in, I want to hug him tightly and hold him forever!" That was very specific, more than Nafra expected out of the girl.
"Nope." "Nothing." "A little bit." Koopa, Corcell, and Ix spoke simultaneously.
"Absolutely!" Forever and ever!" "I want to keep him in my arms and cradle him till the day I die." Oni, Valac, and Madame president respectively answered. Everyone was turning to Nafra now.
"...no?" Suddenly she found herself hit with an instant pain swelling up in her throat, and found herself breathing fire for some reason. "Aggh! It hurts! This fucking hurts!" She let out, not caring about reserving herself at the moment. After about a minute of this it passed, letting in sweet cold oxygen in.
"... Let's just … not talk for a while." Crocell said in response to that.
"Actually I have some questions for my new member." Madame looked at her, and she felt disappointment in her heart. "Did your heart flutter when he reached out his hand to you?"
"...yes." She answered, mainly to not feel the burns again, but she now felt herself being roasted alive by Madame President's fiery gaze alone.
"Did you feel warmth from when he held you close as you flew?" Madame asked, now turning her entire strong and tall body to Nafra.
"...yes."
"Does he inspire you to do more than what you'd usually try to do, make you want to step out and be more?"
"...sorta." She felt small tignes of flames begin to rise. "Nafra...never been helped….like...that….felt...nice...to...help...Midori." The heat stopped rising.
Before anyone could say anything, Midori himself arrived with Lied. "Hey guys, I brought Lied to hang out, so, is it okay if he joins.." Midori paused, looking at the group, before turning his back and dragging Lied. "We're going to Mcdemons."
"Dude! The girls! Don't.."
"I've learned from last time. Don't interrupt girl talk." Well at least he respected privacy.
"I mean …" The group turned to two specific girls with literal hearts in their pupils. "It wouldn't be so bad … as to …"
"Izzy, we spilled pheromones, scatter!" Madame shouted, causing Midori and Lied to now run screaming. At the very least the head start would save them. If only Madame President would stop staring at her like that now. This was why she hid herself and never said anything.
