In Which the Doors Open for Addison

"Oceanside Wellness Group." That's what the sign on the building says at least. I pull my car around to the side of the building and park it before climbing out. I lock the door behind me and really take in the California sun. It's so close to Seattle but it's almost as if the sun is brighter here. I don't know what I'm doing here. It was a spur of the moment trip. After the wedding, I woke up the next day and Meredith was gone. She texted me that she was going on Cristina's honeymoon with her and that was that. I don't know where we stand… I don't think we're going to make it.

Taking off my jacket as I walked towards the building, I almost got run over by some bicyclists. I walk into the building and press the button for the elevator. My old friends Sam and Naomi own this practice here in Santa Monica. It's been awhile since I've seen them and they don't know I'm coming so it'll be a surprise for them.

The elevator dings open and I get in after a guy. I can't help but laugh, "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, it's just… um, I was just reading up on Los Angeles and apparently there's a law against licking toads. Did you know that? There were enough people licking toads at a point of time that they made it an actual law. That's crazy. Right?"

He doesn't reply but just gets off the elevator at the first stop. I shake my head, "Oh my god. Oh my god, I'm becoming a crazy freak, crazy inappropriately chatting freak."

"Becoming? Seems like you're already there," a voice says out of nowhere. I look behind me to look for where the voice was coming from but there's no one on the elevator but me. The doors open on my floor and I step off, still feeling confused. I look around the floor and I see Sam's face and new book, Body Language, plastered all over the walls.

"Oceanside Wellness Group," the receptionist answers the phone. "Uh yes, you're confirmed for Tuesday at 4. Oh, no, no ma'am, no I'm not a doctor… I don't know what you should do about the itchiness down there… Ok, yeah, ok, ok, bye."

"Hi," I start when he hangs up. "I am… I think I'm in the right place. I'm looking for…" I pause as a teenaged girl walks into the lobby. "Maya? Is that you?"

"Addison!" the young girl walking by turns around.

Maya is Sam and Naomi's daughter. "Oh my god. You got so big. What are you like, 45 now?"

"Maya, you're gonna be late for school…" Naomi said, walking up to us. "Addison."

"Naomi. Surprise! I got lost like 8 times. I smell like someone who's been driving in a car for two days and I think I just had some kind of psychotic break in your elevator but um… surprise!"

"Maya, go get your backpack," she said, as Maya walked off. She turned to me, " So… what do you want Addison?"

"I miss you."

"Really? Cause I haven't heard from you in over a year. Unless you count the Christmas card which was nice."

"I know, I know… I'm sorry about… I'm sorry."

"I left you messages on your pager…"

"Right."

"I emailed you. I had some really special conversations with your voicemail."

"All right, could we just let this go? I've been having some rough times lately. Ok? I got divorced."

"So did I."

"Oh my god. You and Sam?" I say as soon as Sam and Maya walk up to us.

He looks shocked. "Addison?"

"Bye, daddy," Maya hugged him.

He hugged her back, "Bye baby."

"Hey," I say to him.

He smiles, "Hey."

"Sam, I'd say good to see you but…"

"Yeah."

"Your face is everywhere. Body language…"

"Yeah, I had a few thoughts so I wrote them down and…"

"And now you're the common man's medical guru."

A woman walks up to the receptionist's desk, "Hi, Dell. Can you push my appointments back an hour? I have to rescue Cooper."

"This is Addison," he introduces me to her. "Addison, this is our shrink."

"Violet, hi," she shakes my hand and continues walking out, "Bye."

"What did Cooper do this time?" Sam asked.

Violet shook her head as she stepped on the elevator, "What does Cooper always do?"

"A woman," Sam and Naomi say at the same time.

As the elevator closes, she says, "I can't believe this. I'm his colleague, not his chauffeur."

"So, this is co-op medicine," I say with a slight chuckle.

Sam nods, "Yeah, doctors working together. It's me, Naomi, we have a pediatrician, a shrink, an alternative medicine practitioner…"

"Could you excuse us for just a minute?" Naomi asked Sam.

Sam nods, "Sure I can. Good morning, Naomi."

"Shut up," she says and he walks away.

I can't help but pry… "So, you two still work together…"

"Hey Pete," she says to a guy passing by and I recognize him as the guy from the elevator.

He walks over to Sam and I follow Naomi into an office. "You work with your ex-husband in a shrine for your ex-husband."

"It's actually a good book. And we're friends. We stayed friends even after we got divorced. It's very healthy. We're healthy."

"What happened between you and Sam?"

"Addison, you and I were close in med school. It was a long time ago."

"Oh, Naomi, come on. You can't stay mad at me forever. I know you."

"You got fat."

"I did not."

"Your hair looks hideous."

"It does not."

"And you're getting really, really ugly."

"Aww. I've missed you too."

"So… why are you really here?"

I couldn't tell her that my new relationship was on the rocks because she didn't even know I got divorced until a few moments ago. I could tell her one of the reasons why I am here. If Meredith and I don't work out, I wanna be sure I can start a family on my own. It's something I've always wanted… I wanted it with Meredith but if she could just up and leave me whenever she feels like it, why wouldn't she do the same to our children?

"You're a fertility specialist, one of the best."

"You wanna have a baby?"

"I wanna have a baby."

Naomi nods and escorts me to an exam room. I lay down on the exam table and Naomi has a small smile on her face. It eases my nerves a little bit. I start to ramble, "I really just wanted a second opinion… The Seattle doctor said that it wasn't possible but I always planned to have one. It's just… Well, now; clearly a partner is not in the cards for me. A baby, that is my answer. Find a sperm donor, have a baby. My new dream… a baby."

"A baby's not really an answer, it's more of a crying, puking non-answer."

"Yeah, but you did it."

"With a husband."

"Yeah but you did it. You got married; you had a baby. You're my example."

"Ok, we should check your FSH and your estradiol levels and we should probably do an antral-follicle count."

"Holy crap," I say as it hit me. "I'm gonna have a baby."

Naomi runs all of her tests and leaves for the lab. I go to find Sam in his office. He's working on something on his laptop and I can't help but to slap him on his head.

"Ow," he says simply.

I slap his head again, "Idiot. You divorced Naomi?"

"Look, just mind your own business, okay… ouch."

"Moron," I hit him again, "She is my best friend."

"Stop hitting me on top of my head."

"Did you cheat?," I slap him again, "Did…"

"Ok, keep your hands to yourself."

"It makes no sense."

"Hey, if you want details, go see Naomi."

"She won't talk about it."

"Well, then you get no details."

"I'm on her side. You know that."

"That's why you get no details."

"Oh, details!"

"Woman, be quiet."

"I've missed you."

"Yeah, well, you know, Naomi's known you longer, so she gets custody of you in the divorce."

"Yeah," I nod, making my way out of his office to find Naomi. I find her in her office and I smile walking in, "So, uh, other than project baby, this is strictly a vacation. I am here to read trashy novels and go to the beach."

"Okay, nobody over 30 goes to the beach. You should stay here at the practice, hang out. See how we work. It's more fun than a stuffy hospital and we have an empty office."

"Naomi, are you trying to lure me?"

"Look, maybe. We do have sunshine and cute boys."

"Yeah, speaking of which," I point at the receptionist, "cute boy behind the desk is tracking you with his eyes."

"No, he's not."

"Oh, cute boy wants Naomi."

"Okay, maybe you should shut up... and go get some coffee or something... please."

I start to walk off as Naomi makes her way over to Dell, the receptionist. I was about to say something about how cozy they looked together when I heard screaming coming from another room. I look at Naomi concerned.

"Did you hear that?" she asked as Sam, Violet and Pete all come out of their offices asking the same thing. We all make our way towards the sound of the screaming.

"What was that?" Pete asked as the screaming started up again.

A man's voice called out, "I'm the father of that child!"

"No, I'm the father!"

"If it's anybody's baby, it's mine!" a woman screams.

"Stop it!" yells another voice as we make our way towards the sound of the commotion. It's in Dr. Freedman's office. When we get there, we see a man standing in the middle holding three guys away from each other. He calls out, "Calm down, everybody! Just… hey, hey, hey, hey!" He looks over his shoulder at us as he gets punched in the face by one of the guys, "A little help here. A little help."

"Oh, my god, Cooper! Cooper!" Violet yells as she walks further into the room.

So this is Cooper.

One of the women calls out, "Oh, Dr. Freedman! Oh, god! Oh, that's great. Really great."

"You gotta be kidding me," Pete says as he walks in and separates everyone into different corners.

They're all ranting to us their sides of the story when Naomi finally steps in, "Okay, let me see if I can explain this to everyone. So Carol was married to Rick. Carol is now married to Doug. Keith is Lisa's husband."

"Uh, I'm Rick's husband," Keith corrects.

Carol rolls her eyes, "Life partner."

"You're just mad I left you for a man," Rick says.

Jim speaks up, "I'm Lisa's husband."

"And Lisa is the…" Naomi trails off as Carol speaks up again.

"Surrogate carrying my child."

"Our child," Rick corrects.

Jim shakes his head, "You are not the father! You don't know that, Rick! I am so sick of you!"

"Hey, hey! Okay, okay. Let's all try to remember that we are in a place of healing," Violet tries. "Uh, Lisa… h-how are you feeling?"

"Guilty," Carol answers for her. "Guilty is how she is feeling."

"Wh-why is that, Lisa?" Violet asks.

Carol interjects again, "Because the same week that I brought her here to be inseminated, she had sex with him…" She points at Rick. "And him…" she points at Jim. "And him," this time pointing at her own husband, Doug. "And now we have no idea who the father is. Yeah, she, um, really gets around."

All of the doctors leave Cooper's office and head for the conference room. I can barely wrap my head around the drama. We're all standing around the table and Pete comes in saying, "Okay, how does this happen? How do you pick a super freak for a surrogate?"

"I-I screened her," Violet admitted. "There was nothing there to indicate she was…"

"Sex crazed?" Cooper asked, holding an ice pack to his face, "Insatiable?"

"Cooper-like?" Violet asked.

Naomi shook her head, "Ooh. Okay. The point is, everybody's flipping out over nothing. Medically, it has to be Rick's baby. We implanted Lisa with a fertilized embryo from Carol's egg and Rick's sperm."

"Then Rick implanted some more of his own for good measure," Cooper said.

Violet added, "Before he decided he was gay."

"I've treated Doug," Pete said, "I have him on valerian root for anxiety and stress. And I knew he was fooling around, but with his new wife's surrogate?"

"Can I just, uh…" I interject, "I think the more pressing issue, uh, here, is that, uh, Lisa's had no prenatal care. She took off right after her, uh"

"Sex-a-thon?" Cooper said then looked at me, "Hi. We haven't officially met. Cooper. Pediatrics."

"Hi," I force a smile. "Uh, yeah, she… left town, and, uh, she and the baby need a complete workup. Um, who's your usual G.Y.N?"

"Uh, she left the practice rather suddenly," Sam says as he looks at Pete.

Pete shook his head, "I didn't do anything."

"Well, look, I would be happy to examine her," I say. "Trashy novels can wait."

This situation was a trashy novel of its own.

Cooper turned towards me and asked, "Have you ever thought of... plying your trade in sunnier climes, Addison?"

"'Sunnier climes'? Now we see why he has to type to pick up women," Violet laughed.

Cooper looked offended, "Hey!"

"Besides, we have a very strict no consorting rule here now," Sam added, looking at Pete again.

Pete shook his head, "I didn't do anything."

We all make our way out of the conference room and go our separate ways. Naomi and I go to Cooper's office to retrieve Lisa for her exam. She's quiet. Maybe she really does feel guilty? I get her settled into the exam room and then go get Naomi. When Lisa's ready, we begin the exam.

"And the week before I implanted the embryo, you slept with how many, three?" Naomi asks, "Three men."

"We're almost done here, Lisa, and then we'll do the amniocentesis," I say from my position at the bottom of the exam table.

Lisa finally speaks, "You're on Carol's side."

"I'm Carol's doctor. You came to us," Naomi said. "You applied to be a surrogate. It was your choice."

"I know. I just… I was about to hand my body over to a baby that's not mine for nine months, which is a big responsibility. That… hit me… the responsibility… and I just... they all wanted me. Me. And f-for once, I just stopped thinking and I just… I did something wild," she said.

Something looks off. I guess Lisa could tell by my face because she asks, "Dr. Montgomery, is something wrong?"

"I'm gonna run some more tests."

I head out of the exam room to run a few more tests. The day is coming to a close and the results won't be in until tomorrow. So I make my way towards the elevators. Once the elevator dings open, I step on, recalling how earlier there was a voice talking back to me. I could just be going crazy but I try talking to the voice again.

"Okay. Hello? Hello? Hello? Hello?"

No one responds. Maybe I am just going a little crazy? I make my way out the building and towards my car when the elevator dings open. The sun's starting to set but it's still warm out. I hop in my car and start the drive towards Naomi's house. I can't stop thinking about Meredith and how she hasn't called or texted since she left. Should I reach out? No. She obviously wants her space or she wouldn't have left without waking me. Instead I should focus on having a baby. This is the right decision. It has to be.

I pull up at Naomi's and park my car as I head towards her door. Maya answers and I give her a quick hug before finding Naomi in the kitchen nursing a bottle of wine. I ask for a glass before making myself comfortable on her couch. I pull out my laptop and begin the search for a sperm donor. After looking at maybe twenty different guys, I find one that I like.

"Okay, this guy is 6'2", dark hair, green eyes, totally healthy. He plays the violin, and he's a physicist. That is good sperm. Geeky, but, uh, good."

"Lisa has extra donors if you want to borrow one," Naomi says, sitting down next to me on the couch. "Her tests come in yet?"

"No, tomorrow. I don't want to ring any alarm bells till we're sure," I say as a scroll on my computer. "What about this guy? He's a marine biologist. Good hair."

"Are you sure you want to do this? Your life is really gonna change."

"That's why I'm doing this. I want my life to change. I need… my life to change," I pause, looking at all the photos of the memories they have together as a family. "I mean, look, you have Maya. You're family. You did everything the way you were supposed to. You didn't wait."

"Maybe I should have... Waited."

"What do you mean?" I ask, looking up from my laptop.

Naomi shrugged, "Addison, I did everything exactly the way I was supposed to. After college, I never dated anybody but Sam, because he was the one. I never had sex with anybody but Sam because cheating is wrong. I had a baby because… that's what you do when you get married. I never made a single mistake. I did everything right. And then Sam comes home and says he wants a divorce. So all those photos you're… busy admiring, all they are, are reminders of all the stuff I didn't do. I'm 38 years old, and I don't know how to have fun. That's not lucky. That's sad. So just... shut up about lucky!"

"Poor… sad… dried up Naomi."

"Shut up."

"Poor little, special talented doctor girl. Let's make a made-for-TV movie… about the poor little, dried up special girl who has no fun."

"I could put you out. You'd have to sleep in the car. I just… I just wish I'd been a little more like you."

"What, an adulterous bitch who forgot to have kids?"

"Addison, seriously."

"I'm serious."

We spent the rest of the night talking about any and everything. We talked about this past year, how I moved to Seattle and Derek followed. I tell her about Meredith; how we started, how things feel like they're ending. We talked about Mark moving to Seattle; about how Bizzy died and I drowned. She looked at me crazily while I explained all of it then she finally forgave me for not reaching out. Once we reached the end of the bottle of wine, we knew it was time to get some rest. I made my way up the stairs to the guest bedroom and got myself ready for bed.