Chapter 27

Life in the Black's house was a little more peaceful despite everything else that was going on. We didn't have to worry about a surprise attack anymore. Though Billy was clearly a little sad he might see less of Renesmee soon. She could win anyone's heart. Except maybe Levi's. Maybe he was some other kind of 'mythological' creature. How surprising would it be if others existed?

Renesmee kept herself busy with all the presents she got from the Cullens and drew pictures for all of them. She wanted to go back right away, but I said we would in three days as we agreed.

"But that's for grown-ups, we can't play?" she said.

"We'll go earlier."

"Why not tomorrow?" I sighed at her.

"Because we said in three days." she pouted with 'angry' eyebrows. I did the same. She went back to her drawings.

It's not that I wanted to avoid them or Edward. I was just thinking if it was possible for us to be like before. What would healing look like? My memories of the past were like bubbles of warm moments from forever ago. Bubbles floating amidst pain.

The following years were 'traumatic'. Jacob was there, he was comforting enough. But no one ever made me feel loved and safe like Edward had. Parents expect a lot from their kids and Edward...had seemed to not care. He didn't have any expectations. He accepted me for me. Ordinary and unimpressive. Then I was thrown away. A truth that was true for two years, corroborated by his utter silence. Then abandonment from the Cullens layered on top. Could that be a thing? It's not like I was abandoned before.

But I was very lonely before, under Renee. I was lonely again when they left. Carlisle's words replayed over and over in my head. I had to give Edward chances to keep his promise. Running away because it was hard or uncomfortable wouldn't help.

By noon, my phone vibrated with a text from Edward.

~ I got your number from Alice. I hope you don't mind. I wanted to know if you were alright after meeting with the elders-Edward.

B: Yeah, we're fine. I think they're going to completely back off now - Now's a good time to update them as any, I thought.

B: Sam agreed to come to the field. A friend of Charlie's is one of the elders, actually. He's going to steer Charlie away from the area the wolves are patrolling in- I told him.

E: That's good.~ I half hoped he'd stop texting me now. I didn't know what else to say and I wouldn't know what to talk about. I fidgeted. How do you patch things up? It's so easy to say you want to. I held my phone in my hands for a long time, and it sat silent. (Unbeknownst to her, so was Edward.)

E: I missed you. I replayed over and over in my head how it was more likely I made the right decision, that I left you with the possibility of growing older and having children albeit with someone else. I know that none of that mattered to you, but...I couldn't help but feel as if I and my world were too disgusting for you to be in. That I had no right to touch it or you. I thought about how perhaps I was right all along; our worlds mixing ruined yours and your life. But I want you, even if it makes me selfish. I can't stay away from you no matter how hard I try; I've been apart from you long enough in my first hundred years. I was so close to returning, even to just watch you, when Alice came and told me everything.~

B: I never thought about having kids. It was never something I wanted. But if the baby was yours, of course, I want it. I don't know if I would've changed my mind about it later on, but I wouldn't have chosen anyone else anyway. I never felt sorry, that by staying with you, I'd never have that.

B: My life might have been harder because of James and now Victoria, but if it gave me all of you, it's worth it. I don't even feel the weight because I know we'll get through it. I'm only worried about the wolves and Jacob. I don't think they know what they're getting themselves into. They're just kids.- I have to tell Jacob to not try to overdo himself. Renesmee won't be the same if anything happened to him.

E: Carlisle and Jasper are aware of that. They're taking it into consideration. I have to go now; we're combing the forest to see if we can find another scent.

B: Be careful.

E: Be safe.


The next day, Renesmee was equally as impatient. I explained both sides were too busy to drop us off there, and Jacob was already 'flaking' to take us to the treaty line the day of the training.

"What can I do to help?" she asked. She was very serious about it. Maybe she could, if she had a different talent or was stronger-But I wouldn't change anything about her. I couldn't tell her that.

"Honey, we're both too human," I said. I knew exactly what she was feeling. Uselessness and guilt, that others were putting themselves in danger and we couldn't take the same risk. An idea occurred to me. What if I was bait? Like with James?

"We can help by staying safe," I said, coming to.

Billy and I spoke a little about where we would go if I decided to move out. Not that he was kicking me out, we were just finally free. He didn't say it in many words, but I knew he'd miss Renesmee. Technically I had the money...my mind immediately went to thinking about how wonderful it would be to live with the Cullens. If it's offered, I should take it; keep Renesmee safe at all times. I told him I'd think about it after we'd dealt with her.

"To be honest, there's a chance he'd swing by. Harry is driving up there, but what if he comes through here?" Billy said.

"Mmm." It's true. "I'll ask Alice to keep an out for me."

The sooner I leave, the sooner they could be best friends like they used to be too, right?


"Mommy, why do vampires glitter?" 'nesmee asked from the backseat. Jacob was driving us up to the treaty line.

"And stink. Not you, Nessie. Full vampires just smell like a horrendous blend of sweet smells times ten." he grumbled.

"What do I smell like?" she asked. I looked to Jacob, I never asked.

"Like...sunshine, and flowers." I wasn't all too surprised he couldn't say exactly what flower.

"What about mommy!" She shouted, leaning forward all the way.

"Flowers and... citrus," he said, smiling softly to himself. Such bygone times. Renesmee turned her attention back to me, not forgetting her previous question. She never forgot anything.

"I don't think the anatomy of vampires has ever been studied but..." I recalled the memory of the Cullens tearing James to pieces and tossing them into the fire they made.

"You've seen diagrams before of the muscular system, right? Full vampires are made, through a bite. I think the fibers of the muscles were just frozen by the venom, and they make facets, like on a diamond, so I guess that's why their skin shimmers. Tiny, tiny facets all over." That theory was further backed up by how tearing off a piece created jagged edges, and the sound it made, but I couldn't tell her that. Would she hear it anyway? Would she be close to the battle? Where do I keep her safe?

"Hey 'nesmee? When we go to the baseball field later, you might see some things." It was like I was gearing up to tell her to tell me when she feels like she was seeing things she shouldn't. I've never exposed her to violence before. Did her hunting count?

"If it's scary, tell me, okay?"

"Okay."

"What are you expecting?" Jacob asked.

"I'm honestly not sure. I've seen the Cullens fight before when they fought James, but I can't imagine the wolves and them play-fighting."

"Why couldn't we just ride you there, Jake?" 'nesmee asked.

"Jacob can only drive us to the treaty line. He's gotta patrol the forest with the wolves 'til tonight. Besides, it's probably best to not ride so close to the other wolves, out of... respect. Something like that. Not pushing their comfort level, ok? It's the 'nice' thing to do. When we're on our own, you can ride Jacob."

"What am I, a mule?" he grumbled.

It didn't take long to make it there. Edward waited, leaning against a large, dark Volvo. I looked at Jacob a bit confused when it looked like he was stopping a ways away, giving a wide birth.

"Might be 'nice' to give the treaty line extra space," he said. I scoffed. They could be so childish.

I got Renesmee and our backpack out of the car and walked with her, Jacob following close behind. Edward came to meet us as close as possible. He and Renesmee smiled widely as she closed the gap and ran into his arms. They were really too perfect together.

"I like your dress today," he complimented, patting the skirt behind her down.

"Thank you,"

"Jacob," he started. I turned and saw Jake coming closer to him. Albeit with crossed arms.

"What can I do ya for?"

"It's probably best if Bella and Renesmee continue to stay with you until we handle Victoria. I'd be happy to compensate your family for the trouble,"

"Bella and Renesmee are family. No payment needed."

"Still...I would like to spend more time with them, make up for the lost time." he said, looking at nessie. "But traveling on the public road will be dangerous. If Victoria-"

"I'll drive her up to the treaty line for you," Jacob spoke up. "Though not exactly for you. Then you can pick them up from there."

"Thank you," he said. I sighed. At least they were being mostly civil to each other.

"It's complicated," Edward suddenly said. I looked up and saw a glowering Renesmee, her hand on his neck.

"Everything's complicated," she muttered.

"Allow me," Edward lightly took the bag from my shoulder. "let's go," he said, starting to back up.

"Thanks, Jake," I said, turning back to him. He nodded.

"Be careful, all of you. Victoria isn't exactly a stranger to fighting," I told him and followed Edward away into Cullen territory.


I've been recovering from a cold that even took my voice. Still on the mend, sorry I'm late. Eat lots for me on turkey day, okay?